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Chapter 6

I battle with my facial features not to scowl. Just when I was starting to have a good time, the cameras had to appear to remind me that I am still part of the show. I don't need Peeta to say the words to know that he feels the same way. We simply look at each other and smile. I don't know how well they can catch the sound or if they could read our lips so I keep my thoughts to myself. There is no script, no schedule to follow so I tell myself to just act normal, try to ignore them and enjoy myself because that is what they want to see. And, of course, make sure Peeta and I act extra lovey dovey.

I know he is thinking along the same lines when he picks up my left hand and kisses it just above the ring finger where my wedding ring rests. I smile at him and lean over to give him a small peck on his lips. Just then, our waiter arrives and takes our order. I want to ask for everything on the menu. We will have a long day.

"Are you sure you want me to come along for your excursion?" Peeta asks me. I am not sure whether it is a trick question or if he is honestly wondering. He couldn't possibly be asking for the cameras as we are expected to be together all the time.

"Of course I want you to come" I say smiling at him. "As if I would let you out of my sight!" I say.

He laughs but looks sincere.

"Won't I slow you down with my leg? Or make too much noise? I remember it drove you crazy in the arena when I kept scaring off the game" he reminds me.

"Well, then it's a good thing we aren't starving" I reply sincerely and I hope it shows on my voice.

He seems to see it and just nods with a smile.

We eat our breakfast and then ask for things we can take for later. We leave with some apples, crackers, some bread rolls and cheese. As we walk out we can't see the camera anymore but we are sure it's around here somewhere.

We walk by the front desk and the boy there salutes us.

"Good morning Mr. and Mrs. Mellark, are you on your way to enjoy the fresh morning air?" he asks politely. I get a strange sensation in my gut as he refers to me by my new last name. I wonder if I will ever get used to it.

"We're actually on our way to explore the woods" Peeta answers cordially.

"Would you like a tour? We have many experts on the resort who would love to show you around and keep you safe in these parts!" he offers kindly.

Peeta wraps his arm around my shoulder and winks at me.

"Thanks but I got all the expertise and protection I need right here" he says with a winning grin from ear to ear and walks out proudly. I just smile at him and shake my head because he's probably right.

As we venture into the woods, I hear the forest become alive around me. I hear every little bug flapping its little wings, the bees buzzing around, a stream not too far from where we are, the wind howling above the tall trees… and of course the crashing and stomping of Peeta's loud steps.

I tell myself to ignore it. What do I care? I'm not hunting. I am so used to be on the look-out for anything we can eat that it's hard to just relax and enjoy it. But once I allow myself to, it feels wonderful.

I couldn't usually do this back home. I couldn't afford to lose the chance of bringing home extra food or something to sell. I rarely ever just relaxed and took in all the wonders that surrounded me, as much as I wanted to. But now that I can, I am glad I get to share it with Peeta.

We reach the stream and the sweet sound of the water running brings me peace and it's the most beautiful music to my ears… if Peeta's feet would let me hear it.

I decide we should just sit for a while so we can fully appreciate it.

I sit by a tree and just rest against it as Peeta sits next to me. I close my eyes and just hear it all. I sniff the smell of the trees, the water, the flowers. I let my fingers play with the soil and the grass and feel their texture. I open my eyes again and admire the perfect shade of green in the leaves, the beautiful blue sky, the clear water that never stops running down the hill. There is a butterfly flying nearby some wild flowers and I decide these are more beautiful than any others, by their simplicity and delicacy, growing unseen until now probably.

I sigh in awe.

"It's so beautiful" I say out loud. "I wish I had better words to describe what I feel right now" I confess, my eyes never leaving the sight in front of me.

"Magnificent… Perfect comes to mind" I hear Peeta express.

I look at him and notice that, while my eyes have been transfixed on the wilderness, his seemed to have been looking in my direction all along. My heart jumps in my chest, unexplainably, as I realize that while I had been talking about the forest… well, he had been talking about me. I look down, disconcerted. I am without words again and I hope the cameras aren't catching this. I don't think it would fit in the madly-in-love angle they are going for.

I'll make sure to give them something to work with later, hopefully, when I have composed myself.

I look at Peeta out of the corner of my eye, to see if he looks hurt or sad, but he looks as normal, as if he had just been talking about what he had for breakfast.

We stay that way for a while longer then I decide we should keep moving, to see what else we find. Peeta follows loudly. But as the day progresses I find it doesn't bother me that much and it has a nice feeling to it, kind of like a reminder that I am not alone.

We walk into a beautiful clearing, very similar to the Meadow, dandelions and all. I observe the sun high in the sky and my stomach also tells me, it must be time for lunch. We settle on the soft bed of grass and eat some bread with cheese and apples, until we are satisfied.

With the nice breeze and our full bellies, our bodies ask to take a nap and I fall deep into the grass beside with Peeta who takes my hand, reminding me we need to keep up with our charade.

I decide this is as good a time as any other to play up just married delight and sit up on my elbow until my face is looking at Peeta's closed eyes. If he noticed my body shifting, he doesn't acknowledge it. He just lies there peacefully.

I was thinking of kissing him but his calm countenance makes me stop for a second. I take in his face and remember our days drawing in the family book when I first noticed his peculiar eyelashes, as blond and long as ever. I see the way his hair flows softly in the wind, his mouth I've kissed so many times, his soft eyes and innocent look, his lips that almost always seem to have the smallest smile on them. I reach forward and caress his hair which prompts him to open his eyes.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you" I apologize.

"That's ok" he smiles at me. I feel like this is the perfect moment to throw in that kiss but neither one of us makes a move. We just look into each other's eyes for some time until he slowly rises to drop a light kiss on my lips. I close my eyes and feel the sensation. I open them as he pulls away too quick. I look at him a little confused then he rises again and kisses me again, just as softly.

He really has taking a liking to these taunting small kisses, I think, as I remember his small kisses on my face during our first dance at the wedding. The exasperation is equivalent. In a small act of revenge, I give him a taste of his own medicine and kiss his left cheek, softly. I slowly move to his forehead and drop another, then another on his other cheek and I really let that one sink in before I kiss just the tip of his nose. Two can play at this game. I lean back to see his reaction only to be surprised.

A nervous sigh escapes his lips, without permission, I am sure. His eyes remain closed, his lips slightly parted, and he is simply immobile. A strange sense of satisfaction travels through my body at this sight and I don't understand it.

His lips stay parted as if inviting me closer but not able to make a move towards me. Before I know what I am doing I am leaning closer until my lips barely graze his, tantalizing him for a reaction that doesn't take too long as he traps my lower lip and his tongue travels the small surface from side to side and I have to catch my breath because it is doing something to me that is completely foreign and a hunger comes alive inside of me, one that I had only once felt before, back in the games, that I never let myself think about again. A hunger that simply denies to become satisfied, that ravenously asks for more, one that takes over my mind and my actions. His arm comes up to my neck to caress it and starts to play with my hair as he rises to sit up higher, never breaking the kiss.

I am completely separated from what is going on anymore, only feeling the hunger and only looking to satisfy it, while something in the back of my mind fights to regain control of my thoughts.

I weaken as he slides his tongue inside my mouth now and fall back on the grass, unable to remain seating, overwhelmed by all the feelings. It's like my body is at full capacity, not an inch of me isn't alive, isn't experimenting something new and exciting and it can't process it all, it's on override.

My hands finally find a way to move but instead of ending this mayhem, they wrap around Peeta's neck and pull him closer, half his body completely on top of mine now.

As all of this is happening, it feels as if I am forgetting something important but my mind is just too occupied to recall what it is. Then it finally manages to tell me I shouldn't be kissing Peeta like this… I just can't remember why… and it feels like there's a pretty good reason why I should stop, but I just can't, I don't really want to. All I want is to satisfy the hunger in me that grows by the second instead of being satiated.

Peeta must have remembered what the reason was because he pulls away, suddenly, alarmed. His eyes just wander around as if regaining his mental capacity. Mine hasn't recovered even though he's stopped kissing me.

Then he slowly leans back down on the grass and just stares into the sky.

Gears seem to kick back into action on my mind and the first coherent thought my mind operates is: What… just… happened?

I remember kissing, lots of it, Peeta on top of me, partially, me taunting him before, an unsatisfiable desire… for Peeta?

Oh my God, what just happened!

I swallow hard as a puzzle in my mind wants to come together but I can't let it. I erase it and sweep it aside, mentally.

Good show for the Capitol, I tell myself. Yes, a good show it was. A show and nothing else. I take a deep breath. Good job, Katniss, you're getting better at acting.

I suppress the eagerness to get up and walk away from this blasted pile of straw and back to the resort. I want a shower, badly. But if I get up right away, it could look bad for the cameras.

Just relax for a little bit, catch your breath. What? My breath is fine, there is nothing wrong with my breathing. It's just a little accelerated, but that's because of this infernal heat and this hay all around me, that is beginning to cause me to itch.

I take one more deep breath and look at the sky to distract my mind. This time of the year it's a mesmerizing shade of blue, not a cloud in the sky. I smile as I admire it when I see a flash of eyes, that very same shade. Ugh! I hate this shade of blue. I hate the stupid sky.

Argh! I can't take it anymore! I stand up and start walking back with long quick strides. A pretty dandelion catches my eye and I pluck it as I walk by it and almost instantly I am repulsed by its particular shade of yellow and I crush it in my hand and violently throw it back.

I hear Peeta struggling to keep up behind me, surely due to the uneven terrain and his prosthetic leg but I don't care. I hear him call my name and walk faster. I vaguely remember I am being recorded for the Capitol but I don't care. They can cut this part out. They got plenty of juicy stuff back there!

Peeta's calls sound farther and farther and I am glad. I hope he gets lost! I start running and within a few more minutes I am back at the resort, shouting something at the receptionist who asked about the excursion. I board the elevator and impatiently wait for it to reach our floor with my hands crossed on my chest. I rip my clothes off as I turn on the shower and let the water run and run and run. My anger slowly starts to fade into a gaping hole in my chest and even then I refuse to acknowledge it.

I remember now that I left Peeta behind in the forest, without a way of knowing how to get back, unprotected and I feel a pang of guilt but I resist the urge to get back out to look for him. He will be fine. He survived most the Hunger Games without me; he will be okay for a few minutes without me babysitting him.

I am upset with him and I can't decipher why but as soon as I go wandering down that road, fear stops me and I decide I'd rather stay mad.

I finally hear the door open and close and I can't help my heart jumping in relief. I try not to come out the shower too fast, so I wait a while longer then come out. As soon as I see him sitting by the glass wall staring out into the forest, I feel a little piece of my sanity return to me knowing he is safe. Good, now I can go back to being angry.

He turns around and opens his mouth to speak but I cut him off.

"Peeta, I don't wanna hear it!" I yell as I run to the bed, flop on it, and hide under the covers.

I hear the slight limp as he comes in this direction and I get ready to reject him as he will surely try to comfort me now.

But my heart skips a beat as he makes a turn by our bed and walks towards the door and out of our room.

A/N: Please leave me a thought! I will appreciate it beyond words can express! I hope you guys don't hate me for this chapter but I promise things will get better!