Ford grunted, wrinkling his nose and turning his head away. Something soft and feathery brushed his upper lip and nose. "Knockitoff, Lee. Tryin'a sleep here."
"How 'bout you stop first," came a grumble from across the room. "I'mma sleep another two hours at least or I'm gonna-FOOOOOORD!"
Lee's voice pitched up into a squeal, startling Ford upright. Something weighty slid off his chest and onto his lap. Glancing down, he caught sight of a pudgy little body and a red cap diving over the side of the cot he'd picked the night before.
"Hey!" Ford rolled off the cot, sprawling on top of the-gnome? "Just where d'ya think you're going?"
"Shmebulock!" The gnome wriggled, dropping a feather and digging grimy little fingernails into Ford's side.
"Help! Lee! Ford! Do somethin'!"
Ford glanced up, his gnome taking the opportunity to break free and scamper toward Fiddleford. Fiddle was mummywrapped in blankets, being dragged out the door by no less than ten gnomes. One stood on Fiddle's chest, shouting orders to the others.
Lee crashed to the ground, using three of the five words that usually got him paddled. His blankets had been knotted from his ankles to the cot. He couldn't help. Ford darted after Fiddle, grabbing the extra gnome off Fiddle's chest and staggering out onto the porch. The thing was built like a brick and squirmed like a wet cat.
"Let go!" The gnome shouted, throwing fists uselessly. "I'm warning you! I've got fairy dust, I'll use it!"
"Tell 'em to let go of my friend," Ford growled, keeping a firm grip. The group holding Fiddle had stopped on the stairs, looking to the gnome Ford held. "You're the boss around here, I can tell. Tell 'em to drop!"
"Or what?" the gnome sneered. "I could just tell 'em to beat you up and go back to what they were doing. How 'bout that, boys?"
A couple of the gnomes grinned and began to set Fiddleford down.
"Or I'll go kick you off the roof!" Ford staggered toward the door, panting. What did these things eat, lead?
The gnome laughed as his henchmen blocked the door. "Yeah, sure. You're barely holding on as it is. Boys, let's show him what gnomes-" he stopped as Lee came barrelling out, punting a gnome several yards with one kick.
"Shmebuloooooooock!" it cried as it crashed into the forest underbrush.
"Alright, which one 'a you redcapped footballs is next?" Lee growled. "Somethin' tells me it's you!" He pointed to the gnome Ford held. "My brother wouldn't'a picked you to hold if'n there weren't a reason. Wanna try flyin'?"
The gnome balked, waving his arms frantically. "Brothers, leave him! Retreat to the forest for another day!"
The gnomes scampered toward the treeline, tripping over each other to be the first away.
"They are gone, now release me!" The gnome demanded.
"Not so fast." Ford handed the gnome to Lee, who grabbed him and tossed him in the air, catching him like a baseball. "You're gonna tell us a few things first, like, what tha heck you want Fiddleford fer! Was it you what's been drawin' on him inn'is sleep?"
"I don't know what you're talking about!" The gnome squealed, wriggling. "I don't draw, and who wouldn't try? With that big a reward out!"
"Reward?" Lee shot Ford a worried look. "What's this crazy talk? Fess up!"
"The whole forest knows!" The gnome blubbered. "Get the squealy one with burns, get the sixer. One wish, any kind!"
Ford's eyes narrowed. Someone wanted Fiddleford and him? But not Lee? "Who's offerin'?"
"Can't say, you can't make me! I won't!" The gnome chomped down on Lee's arm. Lee howled, dropping the little man who charged at the treeline like his life depended on it.
Ford knelt by Fiddleford, tugging at the viciously tight blanket folds. "Nevermind him. Good goin', Lee. What took ya so long?"
"Stupid tiny little knots," Lee muttered. "Had ta rip through 'em. Don't s'pose you'll do mine next?" He pointed to the torn blanket still knotted around his ankle.
"Sure thing. Hey, Fiddle?" Ford pulled the blankets open. His friend trembled like a teacup pup under the blankets. "It's okay, we gotcha. Ain't nobody stealin' you away."
"You heard 'em," Fiddle squeaked, "They'll be back. An' what else around here, Ford? They're comin' fer me an' you! We gotta go home, tell our parents we're sorry. I'll just wear sweaters 'til it goes away, I'll be fine!"
"No good, runt." Lee reached down, hauling Fiddle to his feet. "C'mon. You go back, you'll just end up with more'a the same, an' mebbe they'll find out and send you back you-know-where. I'm not gonna stand by an' watch it happen again, y'hear me?" He glanced over. "Ford, you with me?"
"With you," Ford nodded. "Whatever wants us got us here real 'specially, an' if we don't figure out why, it'll just keep goin'. Whatever happens, we go everywhere t'gether now. They don' want Lee fer some reason, so Lee, you gotta stay close."
"Roger roger."
"Are you both bats?" Fiddle backed away from them. "Gnomes! Gnomes! Gnomes aren't real! They're jus' ugly lawn things! But they're real here, what else? We gotta split now, while we can!"
Sighing, Ford rubbed his forehead. "Fiddle, how long you think you can run if'n this is where the answers are?"
"Long as I gotta!"
"Look. We go home now, it's gonna be super suspicious. At least we gotta get proof'a stuff so they know you ain't crazy, ain't hurtin' yerself, and it ain't yer fault. With me so far?"
"How are we gonna get proof?" Fiddle hedged.
"Kodachrome!" Lee grinned. "Oh man, Ford, can I have cam duty, can I?"
"Sorry, Knucklehead. Need yer fists free. I've got cam duty."
Lee rolled his eyes. "Fine, Poindexter, but I want to get at least one good shot'a somethin' weird."
"You got it. Fiddle? We'll take pictures, prove why we came here. You'll be covered, won't hafta go back ta that place." Ford held out a hand. "C'mon, we got this far. Don't back out now."
Fiddleford stared at the hand for awhile, before taking it. "Fine. But I wanna leave a lot sooner than a week."
"Then we best get some answers." Lee turned, heading back into the shack. "Grab our gear, we're goin' hiking."