I can honestly say this chapter wouldn't have been written without some of my favorite songs :) Including: Signs by Ron Pope, Run by Snow Patrol, Sailing On by Ryan Star, and the list goes on and on...
RIP to the brilliant Robin Williams, you will be dearly missed.
"Okay I would like a venti and grande black coffee, please." It was one of those mornings where I hadn't slept a wink the past two nights. The Starbucks lady looked at my current state and nodded with an over-the-top smile. I am so overjoyed that this lady finds my horrible life amusing. I threw money down quickly before saying something that could quite possibly get me kicked out of the only Starbucks in town. Yeah, I would never risk that.
"Clary, hey," I didn't even have to turn around to know that it was the one person I did not want to see.
"Oh, great. It's you," there was no way to stop the nasty tone that slipped from my mouth. I still had no intention of turning around. Instead I observed the barista pouring my coffee so slowly; it felt like watching grass grow.
He tried the grab my wrist to turn me around, but I flinched about a foot away. "Clary, please, this is ridiculous! Why haven't you been answering my calls? Or texts?" he sounds desperate. It isn't a good look on him, I noticed as I turned around.
"You can't technically ignore someone if you've blocked them. Can you, Simon?"
"Venti coffee and grande coffee!" Practically racing to the counter, I grabbed my drinks and headed for the patio exit.
Naturally, though unfortunate, he was right behind me. "You're being a little overdramatic about this, Clary."
"You are such a hypocrite, you know that don't you?! I ignore your calls for two nights and I'm a huge bitch, but you ignore me for weeks and it's perfectly okay? Well fuck you, Simon. That's a bunch of bullshit. You know what, it's fine. I thought I needed you and I ended up crying at your doorstep," I opened my car door to distract myself from crying again. No sleep had officially wrecked all of my emotions. "It's fine though, I realized I don't need you as much as I always thought I did. Anyways it doesn't matter, I'm going to be late for work." I close the door and speed off before I can even put my seatbelt on.
By the time I pull into the parking lot, I've already finished my grande coffee. I knew two coffees would be needed today.
This sounds awful, but it wasn't even the situation with Simon that had me in this state, it was completely Jace. Why did he have to do that? Why did he have to ruin everything? I can't even close my eyes without picturing it in my head. I was afraid to sleep because there was no questioning what my dreams would contain. My outburst at Simon wasn't even truly about him. I was just in too much of a foul mood to really decipher where my anger was coming from until it was too late.
I am successfully ruining relationships left and right. Congrats Fray, you've done it again!
School actually isn't supposed to start for another ten minutes so I may have lied to Simon, but I had no intention of staying there and fighting with him. We knew the worst things about each other, and we could ultimately ruin our friendship if we really started fighting.
Stacy, one of my students, held the door open for me so I made polite conversation with her for a few seconds before she ran off to her friends.
Isabelle walked right in front of me, blocking my path. "We need to talk." She looked as gorgeous as ever, even though she too had bags under her eyes. Unless you were looking for them, like I was, you'd never notice.
"Sorry I can't. I have a lesson to plan, papers to grade, and people to ignore," I stepped to the right of Izzy and kept walking. She huffed in annoyance and went back to the office.
Knowing this was going to be the longest day ever, I kept picturing the great night of sleep I would eventually have.
The first bell hadn't gone off yet, so I prayed Jace would just leave me alone for a few hours. "Are you just going to ignore me today?" All hope was then lost.
I didn't answer right away, in hope that I could come up with some excuse that wasn't stupid. We needed to stop this, and I presumed Jace would think the exact opposite. I didn't even want to think about the consequences to our actions, but I was going to have to eventually.
"There's that word again…no I don't need to ignore you. Yesterday I reflected on our actions, and I think it would be in our best interest if we just forgot about it," I smiled at him. Hopefully he couldn't see how fake it was.
Jace studied my face and said, "How am I supposed to forget it?"
"It was just a kiss, Jace, I'm sure you had plenty of those before." I went back to grading papers, which probably should have been done yesterday instead of wallowing in my own self pity.
The next thing I know, Jace has his hands on my desk and he's leaning over it towards me. "Oh I'm sorry, most of my kisses don't last twenty minutes. And they definitely don't end with both of us shirtless in the backseat of my car."
I really had no idea how to respond, but the bell rang so it seemed like the big guy was rooting for me. I'm glad someone is. How does a person answer that?
Throughout the next hour I just watched Jace. He turned into Mr. Aggressive and his teacher game was on point. Taking out one of my school notebooks, I wrote down some of the things he said to the students. I know it was weird, but this stuff doesn't come natural to me like it does to him.
Teacher Etiquette by Clary Fray:
1. Always treat the students with respect (even if they are bitches).
2. Give them your FULL attention.
3. Take their thoughts into consideration (even if they are stupid).
4. Don't bring your personal issues to the classroom (refer to Jace currently).
5. Don't sleep with students.
6. Don't sleep with staff.
7. Do not sleep with teachers.
8. Just don't sleep with anyone; it makes life worse.
9. Stop caffeine addiction ASAP.
10. Make sure not to get attached to students.
11. Have authority always (even when intimidated).
"What are you doing?" Jace whispered in my ear. I jumped and my notebook went flying to the floor.
"Jesus," I lost my breath for a few seconds so I was a little unsteady.
"Nope, but I've been told the resemblance is startling."
I laughed slightly, remembering Simon say the same thing. "You should get some new material, Mr. Lightwood. Simon uses that one all the time."
Jace picked up the notebook, but of course he had to read it before giving it back to me. Typical. "You should rethink seven and eight. There's no fun in that. Especially when you're talking about me."
"You are so narcissistic, it's repulsive." Some snickering started and I quickly realized we had an audience. My face reddened and I giggled, truly embarrassed for him. "Oops."
"Get back to work guys. Don't make me give you more to do tonight; you all know I will." The students simultaneously groaned but opened their books and starting writing. "Ms. Fray, can I see you out in the hallway for a minute?"
I put my best pout face on, "If I say I'm sorry, can we not?"
"Not a chance," Jace pulled my chair out, roughly I might add. It caused me to whimper at him, but it was to no avail, so I followed him outside.
He checked to see if there was anyone in the hall, then took me and pushed me up against the lockers.
"Jace, what the fuc–" he cut me off by kissing me like it was his dying wish. These lips are like a drug, my own personal kryptonite. If I died right now, everything would be okay.
But then again, I'm in a hallway where anyone could see me making out with my boss. When my legs made a move to wrap around him, I pushed him away with all my strength. "YOU HAVE GOT TO STOP DOING THAT."
"My apologies, I had no reason to do that right now," he turned around and started pacing while getting his breath back. "I called you out here because we need to talk, but honestly I can't look at you without wanting to attack you again. I've been waiting years to do it, so forgive me for being a little impatient now that I know what it's like."
I was fighting a grin, Fray 1, World 1. "C'mon Jace, this thing between us," I pointed at him and then back at myself, "won't last. It's just the forbiddance of it that keeps it interesting. Here you are acting like I've put you under a spell, when truly I have just been something you aren't supposed to want. We just need to take a break from it. I haven't slept in two days so I would really like to sleep tonight, but God knows I won't be able to if I have to worry about this mess." He nodded, but I could tell he didn't want to drop it yet.
We walked back into the room just as the bell ended first period.
My venti coffee was finished by the beginning of third period, and after twenty minutes I needed to pee again. The freshman were learning about World Studies so Jace had them doing different projects about each continent, though he did exclude Antarctica. Since each continent had different countries and diversity, none of the groups were doing the same basis of the project. It was an interesting concept considering how boring some of this information could be.
Teachers had a way of being lazy when assigning the same projects to everybody, but Jace was not that kind of educator. I envied how easy it was for him to love his job. He was currently walking around the room checking on the groups to see how their research was progressing. I stood up and met him across the room. "Yes, Ms. Fray, you may go to the bathroom. Though this feels like the seventh time today."
"In my defense, it's only been four," the freshman laughed as I walked out the door, away from my annoyed mentor.
When I was washing my hands the intercom went off and Isabelle said, "Clary Fray, to the office please!"
Do I have to?
My reflection was monstrous, and I thought about just going home sick. My father would somehow hear about it, so it wasn't a very good idea. I felt a fever was coming on so I splashed some cold water on my face before leaving the bathroom.
The office looked much better without the balloons everywhere. It definitely looked better without a crying Isabelle on the floor. Speaking of her, she was currently staring at me from her desk. She must have said something when I walked in, "I'm sorry, what?"
"I asked you when your birthday is."
She didn't sound very interested in the subject, or maybe she just didn't want to be in a conversation with me. "August, why?"
In a very snotty tone, "So your mom doesn't know when your birthday is?" Izzy tosses me a package from the floor.
I decide against a bitchy response so I examine the box instead. It's just a normal UPS shipping box, but my mom has decked it out with "Happy Birthdays".
I start grinning despite my awful mood. "Oh, it's a long story." I couldn't get the box opened with my nails so I asked Izzy for a box cutter, luckily she had one.
Mommy dearest had outdone herself yet again. The whole inside of the box had scattered paint all over it. Inside was a smaller box with my name painted on the wrapping paper.
Underneath the wrapped box was a small piece of paper taped to the bottom.
Clary,
I can't believe you're going to be twenty-two in just a few short months. You have no idea how proud I am to be your mother. My friends say I brag about you too much, and they're right. I know we see each other a few times a year, but Clary, I miss you so much. That's why this year I decided to get you something for the both of us.
Love Always,
Mom
P.S. There's one for Simon too.
Well she might have to refund whatever it is. Opening the box I discovered two plane tickets to New York City. They were two-way flights from LAX to JFK scheduled during Spring Break. It would be a miracle if we were on speaking terms by the time of this flight.
"Fuuuuuuuuck me," I dramatically pulled my head back in agony.
"Is that an invitation?" the cocky familiar voice of Jace commented from behind me. Groaning loudly I took the box and headed back to my own personal hell.
When I walked back into the room, the lights were out. Alec was in the front showing the kids how to do something on the projector. They were going to the computer labs later this week during class, so I assumed he was explaining different ways to present their projects.
With Jace gone for the time being, I decided to text my mom.
Thank you so much, Mom! I can't wait to come see you! I'm sure Simon will be thrilled to visit his family as well. Thanks for thinking of him :)
All complete lies.
Now I had to actually speak to Simon and soon. Texting him now would be an awful idea, considering the way I dealt with him this morning. Putting my head in my hands, I wonder what I've done to deserve all of this.
Once Alec was done he left, and I just walked around the room helping the students like Jace had done earlier. Jace did not return until the bell rang to end the period. I had been expecting a stupid comment or two from him, but he just kept quiet. The silence was uncomfortable, but perhaps needed.
Around lunchtime, I was seconds away from passing out due to exhaustion. Jace still hadn't said a word to me, not that I really cared. Okay, it was fairly annoying.
After the class left I broke the silence, "Mr. Lightwood?"
"Hmm?" he didn't even bother to look up from his laptop.
It was a long shot but I didn't know how much longer I could do this, "Do you think I could go home sick? I feel like death."
Jace gave me his full attention then and worry filled his expression, "Are you alright?"
"To be completely honest, no, not really. My lack of sleep is getting to me and I think I may have a fever," I clarified and started packing my stuff. I assumed from his concern that he was going to say yes, but honestly didn't really care much about his approval at this point; I just wanted to go home.
"Yeah that's fine, Clary. I'll let Izzy know what happened, so you can just leave. Feel better!" He walked out the door with me so he could head to lunch. I started going the other direction, just so I didn't have to walk with him. Going home was a blur, all I know is that I passed out as soon as my head hit the pillow.
Someone has been banging on the door for five minutes and I've been trying my best to ignore it.
"Helen, can you get that please?" I say from my pillow and go straight back to sleep.
And thirty seconds later, more bangs begin.
I peer up from my bed to look at my roommate's perfectly made bed. Getting out of bed is unarguably the worst pain my body has ever experienced. But if there were something to argue it with, it would be my first hangover; I don't think I got out of bed for twelve hours the next day.
Only tripping once on the way to the door, I considered it an achievement. My room was pitch black, so it had to be sometime in the middle of the night. I unlocked the door and dragged it open. Then I slammed the door in his face and went back to bed.
Just a bad dream, Clary. It's just a horrible nightmare.
Then I'm being shaken awake; instinctively my hand connects with my perpetrator's face. After a few seconds, the pain in my hand feels all too real, and I realize that I actually just punched someone. I hear a muffled chuckle and then my desk lamp is being switched on.
Jace is standing over me holding his face, but his award-winning smirk is still present. "I didn't think you had it in you, Morgenstern."
Hearing that, I was suddenly wide-awake. "Don't call me that."
"My apologies, Ms. Fray. I just used to know someone who had practically the same punch as you. Odd fellow, he was. Had blonde hair so white, it looked bleached. Take one look at his father though and you can see the resemblance. I haven't seen him in quite some time, but I'm sure if I went through your phone, I'd find his number."
I slowly sat up throughout his speech about my brother, not getting what the point was. "Okay, and?"
"Well you see, I still don't seem to understand just why you go by Fray now. I mean the last name Morgenstern would give you so many opportunities. Your father has hundreds of companies all over the world, and thousands of connections. You could be at some super rich private school in London right now, but instead here you are. So my question is, why?" It was the first time anyone had ever asked me that. Everyone just assumed it was because I hated my father, or that I wanted to start on my own without his reputation behind me, both were true but not the whole of it.
"That was the reason why my father cut me off, you know? Oh God, he was so angry," I couldn't help but giggle at the memory. "I changed it legally, once I turned eighteen. As soon as he heard about it he took the first flight here to drag me back home. It's ironic because he had just visited to give me my birthday present, my green Kia Soul. It took him a whole month to get his head out of ass and let it go–" Jace interrupted me before I could finish.
"Speaking of letting it go, can we go?"
"Well I guess you are the type to skip right through foreplay," I joked and looked at the alarm clock on my nightstand. "It's almost midnight, can I ask why you decided the best time to visit was in the middle of the night? I'm surprised my RA didn't skin you for making such a racket at the door."
Jace then pulled the covers off of me and pulled me up so I was standing in front of him. "C'mon Clary. If you saw me holding fifty dollars and a flirty smile, you'd melt too."
"On the contrary, I think I'd take the money and run." I started walking to my closet to get a change of clothes for whatever Jace was here for. My clothes were still on from school earlier, so I felt gross.
"That's ironic because that's exactly what Katie did," I snuck a peek at Jace grinning from the mirror on my closet door. I couldn't help the small smile that appeared on my face a second later, his goofy smile was contagious.
Going through my clothes, I settled on some cozy sleepwear. I had no idea why he was here, but I was not about to get all dolled up. "Tell me I can wear pajamas and I'll come."
"That's perfect, but you should bring stuff for tomorrow as well."
I was shell shocked to say the least, "Wait, what?" My body froze and I turned around to look at him as he answered.
"Oh, calm down. I'm not taking you to my secret cave in the middle of the woods. I just wanted to sit on my couch and watch movies, and I figured adding another person to that equation sounded like a better evening. Also I heard about the fight you had with Simon and figured you needed somebody."
He had a point. Without Simon, who was I going to nerd out with and complain about my life to? I didn't have anyone else. Closing myself off from the world has ruined me from having friends. That's probably why I've had horrible luck with boyfriends too. Remembering my past experiences in that department makes a shudder run through my body.
I shoved the clothes in my bag and swung open the door. When Jace walks past me he expects me to follow him. After waiting a few seconds he asks, "What're you waiting for?"
"Dude, I have to change out of these clothes and take a shower." I say it like it's the most obvious thing in the world, because it is.
"Okay well change quick and you can shower at my place," he states and closes the door to give me privacy, but also probably to avoid hearing my protests. Jace was definitely a manwhore, so I assumed he'd have some type of girl's shampoo. My bag was filled with random clothes from my closet. Lastly, I put on a pair of sensible black flats and snatched up my keys. After making sure my door was locked, I turned around to find Jace propped up against the wall opposite my dorm. He's completely focused on a game on his phone.
I wait for a few seconds, but he's still completely engrossed in his game by the time I'm walking towards the parking lot. I roll my eyes once I hear Jace calling after me when I'm near the staircase.
He catches up to me fairly quickly so I stop and let him catch his breath. "What game were you playing?"
He pushes his hair back with his hand, a nervous habit that I just now noticed. "Candy Crush, obviously."
I laughed at him, until I realized how completely serious he was being. He held the door open for me, being the gentleman that he was. "If it makes you feel better, I'm addicted to Kim Kardashian Hollywood."
He snickered and replied, "Yeah, yours is way worse."
Making my way to my car, Jace then grabbed my wrist and started walking in the other direction. I stopped us both and said. "Jace, I'm driving my own car."
"That's a waste of gas."
The look I was aiming for was a general why must you annoy me, but I think it came off more, as you are a fucking idiot. "Jace, you have to coach after school, what am I supposed to do? Twiddle my thumbs waiting for you to be done?"
"I mean it only takes roughly an hour, and we could grab dinner afterwards. C'mon please?"
"Why now, Jace?"
"Because I don't want to spend today alone," something about the way he said it, made me agree. The thought of being alone, which apparently I now was, terrified me.
It took about five minutes before Jace pulled into a private drive. The driveway was lit up with lights and the mansion looked beautiful. I wanted to have a better look at it during the daytime, before I made any snide comments about it. "I will never get used to this."
"Oh C'mon, it's not that big! It's smaller than the size of your house."
Only mildly annoyed, "My father's house. I hated that place."
"Yeah me too, let's just get inside." He opened the door and took my bag from me.
The inside wasn't extravagant, much to my approval. We were standing in a foyer with a huge spiral staircase, which seemed to have access to every floor. "This is Izzy's floor. It's probably best to leave her alone tonight. Alec has the basement, which is usually empty. The attic is all mine and incidentally is my favorite place in the whole world." Jace grabbed my hand and guided me up the stairs. "I wouldn't try to slide down the railing if I were you, you'll get a chipped tooth like me." My laughter echoed through the stairwell, and it made Jace join in.
Jace went off somewhere while I inspected his living room. The room was a navy blue and the trim was white, along with the furniture. I should feel completely awkward right now, but I feel more at home than I have in a long time. The wall was decorated with a few paintings, which somehow reminded me of my own work. I loved the attention to detail and artist's way of making me feel connected to the paintings.
I had no idea where Jace ran off to, so I decided to see if he had any other paintings around. He had Starry Night and Irises hanging on the wall throughout the hallway, there were also pictures of Jace's family and it felt like I was seeing him for the first time.
One of the pictures showed a smaller Jace holding the youngest Lightwood; I think Izzy mentioned his name was Max. It was weird to see Jace look so carefree, it made me want to see him like this again.
"Ah, wasn't I just the cutest little nine year old ever? To be fair, this was exactly three seconds before he threw up all over me." Jace appeared next to me with a bowl of popcorn and a bag of sour gummy worms.
"Why must you be so egotistical…please tell me Max takes after Alec in that department?"
His famous grin reappears when he answers, "You'll be happy to know that Max doesn't take after either of us. He's into comic books and anime."
"Hm, I think I'd like to meet him," I bite my lip knowing that was really forward of me. Jace seemed to look uncomfortable and I attempted to save myself, "Sorry, I didn't mean to freak you out. It's just I know a lot about that stuff, so I'd get along great with the little guy." I nervously laugh and scratch the back of my neck.
"Clary, stop. You're fine; considering what Isabelle's been putting you through lately, I can't believe you didn't kick me out of your dorm room. We don't get to see Max much anymore, so I hate talking about him. Do you still want to watch a movie?"
"Only if I can have those gummy worms."
"Deal."
We settled on Frozen, because Jace had never seen it and it being one of my favorites. I didn't think about how awkward this whole thing would be, and I probably should have. We were sitting exactly three inches apart and our hands were barely touching. I could barely pay attention to the movie, all I could hear was Jace breathing down my neck. It felt like every movement he made was directed at me. So many scenarios popped through my head, I could barely contain myself.
I took a deep breath and tried to turn my interest back into the movie. We were about half way through the movie when Jace's pinky started fidgeting with mine. It took a total of ten seconds for Jace to have me pinned down beneath him.
"I'm sorry, but I can't watch a movie when you're sitting right next to you." His lips met mine for a split second, and I groaned when his mouth left mine.
"Patience is a virtue, young one. I refuse to make out in front of Disney characters." His warmth receded as he searched for the remote around the couch.
I sat up and helped him look for a couple minutes, but couldn't find it anywhere. Frustration overcame me, and I did the one thing that came to mind. I walked to the outlet and unplugged the TV. "Now…where were we?" I turned slowly to find Jace with a mischievous look on his face.
"You know you could've just clicked the power button," he said as he made his way towards me.
"Nah that would have been too easy." This time I grabbed his collar and pulled him down to my height. "I don't know what we're doing. All I know is that this is stupid and I'm going to regret it, but right now all I want is you." His lips were soft when they met mine. I didn't want to waste any more time and the kiss became more intense just as Jace lifted me up to start walking through the house.
The heat was passionate and so was everything else. I was thrown on a bed and our clothes were thrown to the floor.
The world went away as Jace's mouth left mine again to whisper, "Happy Valentine's Day, Clary."
AND THEN SHE WOKE UP.
JK, I promise.
A/N: Guys this is important, please read. I think I'm going to take a break from writing this story. Honestly, I miss my other story so much, and I'm beginning to lose motivation for this one. Ideas are always welcome, and I'm sure I'll post a few chapters here and there, but I won't be continuously working on it.