I'm back with a new chapter! It's been a while, hasn't it? I finished my high school finals, got good marks and am now going to start college soon. It's been a hectic few months.
I've had this typed out for quite a while, but I had to make some changes and find time to post it.
Thank you so much for sticking around and giving this story so much support. It didn't win the contest, unfortunately, but weirdly, I kind of expected that.
Thanks to the reviewers of Ch 1: UrmixMoonstone, Three Sisters One Account, How're you doing, LiteralistNazi, Heavy Distance and all the guests.
I've also updated a chapter of 'Joy, Pain and Regret' and I hope u guys will read it and review.
Plus, I'm co-writing and uploading a new story called 'Akagami No Noroi: The Curse Of The Crimson Hair'. It has been co-written with LiterastNazi , aka, How're you doing. It's a story that is precious beyond words and I hope you guys give it a shot and read it, just for me.
Disclaimer: I do not own KnS. Only this beautiful story and its content.
"In my heart is a memory, and there you'll always be."
The man was killing her. Literally. He just couldn't shut up.
The grip on her wine glass had tightened and her knuckles turned white from the strain. She was pretty sure that the glass would break soon.
She took deep breaths to calm herself. The soft jazz music did nothing to soothe her nerves.
'Don't punch the guy. Don't make a scene. You are representing your family. Be fucking elegant.' Her mental pep talk was obviously not helping her because her hands were still trembling and her polite smile was still frozen. She had been talking and moving around this bloody room for a long time and she was tired and cranky and just wanted to tumble into bed. It had been a long day.
The guy wasn't bad looking. He was pretty handsome, in fact. She assumed that he must be in his late thirties. He was too old for her. If that wasn't enough, he seemed to have an inflated opinion of himself and didn't seem to get the hint.
She counted off his flaws in her mind as he droned on and on about the beautiful city of London and its wonderful nightlife, obviously trying to persuade her into his bed.
Obnoxious. Old. Irritating. Annoying. Flashy. Dense…
But she couldn't punch him. This was a special party for God's sake. Many of the world's powerful spell casters were here from all parts of the world and from different families. A socializing event. That's what it was.
She usually never attended these gatherings. They took place once in five years….or something like that.
But her father had requested her to attend and she wasn't going to let him down; not after all he was doing for her.
So here she was, in a sleek black evening gown that stuck to her curves. It had a slit on the side and showed off her long creamy legs. And she was certain that her black stiletto heels would give her blisters. What the hell was she thinking, buying shoes one size smaller!?
She mentally cursed the persuasive saleswoman.
"So how about it?" The man looked at her quizzically, obviously expecting a reply, his voice seductive.
She actually found his tone rather revolting. She didn't even know which family he belonged to.
Andrews? Blythe? Sullivan?
He was obviously a foreigner.
"Pardon me?" Her voice was sickly sweet, almost scary. She had reached her patience limit.
But he was obviously too drunk or too full of himself to notice.
"I asked if you would… like to go someplace else?" His hand reached towards her waist, trying to pull her closer.
She opened her mouth to tell him what she thought of him, while positioning her leg to kick him in the groin.
That was the thing about dresses with slits – you could easily kick people.
A smooth, toned voice interrupted her and she felt a warm, reassuring presence behind her.
"I'm afraid she's already made plans with me for tonight." His voice, though polite, had an edge of steel in it and she found a shiver going up her spine.
His hand curled around her waist, pulling her away from the man and towards his chest.
The man turned still, glaring at him. Then his eyes widened in recognition and he muttered an excuse and staggered off.
Kazuma Yagami was, after all, a force to be reckoned with.
"I could have taken care of him." Her voice was surprisingly calm, though her heartbeat had picked up. She feared she might go into cardiac arrest soon.
She slowly turned to stare into his amused dark eyes.
"I'm sure you would have." His lips were slightly upturned and even his small smile made her want to melt.
But after a few seconds, she found that she was surprisingly comfortable in his presence.
Her heart rate slowed down and she could smell his scent.
Cinnamon.
Just as she remembered it from all those years ago.
It had been three years since she had bidden him farewell from her life and her heart.
Looking at his face now, she felt that after all those years of knowing him; she was seeing him for the first time.
Being away from him all this time hadn't made her forget his presence.
But forgetting about him had never been her intention.
She had loved him and he had rejected her.
She had given up hope of them being together, had given up trying to cure him and make him forget, had given up being in the background trying to get his attention…but that didn't mean she had stopped loving him. She had tried, but realized that it was impossible. Her heart still had a dull ache and she wasn't sure if it would ever go away. But she had learned to live with it.
She had no idea about the future. She didn't know if she would get married for love or to produce an heir. Hell, she didn't know if she would get married at all! She was just going with the flow.
Now, as she faced him, Ayano could just be herself.
She didn't need to hide her pain in order to comfort him. She didn't need to pretend to be alright when she wasn't. She didn't need to hurt herself. Not anymore.
Everything had been laid out on the table. He knew her cards and she knew his. There was nothing to hide.
She was finally at peace with herself.
"What are you doing here?" She assumed that only spell caster families sent representatives. She hadn't thought that he would be here.
"I was invited." His eyes looked at her calmly, intently. She found herself staring back.
"Of course you were." Her voice was wry as she finally took in his appearance.
He looked as delicious as always. His black suit defined his arm muscles and his towering height gave him an intimidating air.
His eyes looked her up and down, taking in her appearance.
"You look beautiful today." His deep, low baritone made her feel warm inside. She wasn't kidding herself. His opinion mattered to her.
"Thank you." She gestured to his suit. "You're looking good yourself. Finally got yourself another suit, huh?"
"Hmm. I had to." He took a swig of his champagne. His eyes never left her crimson ones and she couldn't break eye contact; didn't want to break eye contact.
"I have had enough of this party." He looked around the room full of weak and powerful magic users from all over the world and from different races and having different elements, with a bored expression.
"Shall we?" He gestured towards the exit.
Without even thinking about it, she nodded, gulping down her remaining wine and following him towards the exit.
Besides, she had been here for three hours. And it was pretty late.
Walking out into the cool air, the night lights of London twinkled around them. The air was slightly nippy, but she didn't mind. She was a fire magic user after all.
They walked about the pavement in companionable silence.
There were no words uttered. They had been through it all, had lived through it all.
Her stomach slowly untangled itself. She never had been comfortable in stuffy parties. And the fresh air was refreshing.
"How have you been?" His low voice washed over her, breaking the understanding silence.
"I've been fine. Travelled. Studied. Trained." She looked up at the stars above. The sky was clear and the stars were bright. They made her realize the vastness of the universe.
"What about you?" She knew he had left Japan a month or so after her departure. Ren had made it a point to tell her, even though she had never asked.
"I went to work briefly with the McDonalds. I've done various other jobs." He was looking up at the sky with her, his voice peaceful.
"Have you been back to Japan?" She didn't know whether or not to call Japan 'home'.
"No." He replied shortly. "I haven't been home." His breath made puffs in the cold air. His hands were jammed in his pockets. She didn't blame him. It was cold after all.
"I haven't been either. For three years." A faint smile crossed her face. He still called Japan 'home'. It made her happy. She missed everyone very much, even though they were in touch. She missed her friends and her family.
She missed killing youmas and then bitching at Kirika about her crappy day. She missed ruffling Ren's soft blond hair. She missed having sleepovers and partying with her friends. She missed her father and his disapproving looks and his words of praise. She missed Uncle Genma and his irritating attitude.
She missed home.
But she would have to return soon anyways. She chose not to dwell on it.
They were walking along a bridge now, overlooking a river. Was it the Thames? She couldn't really tell.
Her stupid shoes were killing her feet. Finally giving up her internal struggle, she reached for Kazuma's arm for support.
He stopped, looking at her curiously. She could feel this strong biceps under his shirt. She told herself to ignore it as she reached down and took off the offending stilettos, holding them in her hand.
"They're rather painful." She smiled at him sheepishly.
"Of course. They're heels, Princess." His eyebrow quirked upwards and she couldn't help but laugh at his incredulous expression. His nickname for her made her feel happy inside. Some things between them would never change.
"Uh-huh." With her still giggling, they continued walking, her hand still on the crook of his elbow and his hands still in his pockets.
He didn't shrug her hand off and she didn't retract it.
"I have never jumped into a river." Her sudden declaration made him look at her quizzically.
"Ayano. You can't… you shouldn't… jump into rivers." He looked at her seriously. "Unless there's no other choice."
"Hmm. But I would like to. One day." She gazed longingly at the rushing water below, silently flowing with a rushing sound that would usually be drowned out by traffic. But it was late, and she could hear the gurgling and churning of the river below. She imagined how it would feel like. It would be like being in a Jacuzzi pool. Only it would be rougher. And may result in possible death.
"Just don't kill or injure yourself." He shook his head at her, amused. The wine had obviously gone to her head.
"I won't." She reassured him, quietly.
They resumed walking.
Everything was good.
She would probably be the only girl who would walk about the pavements of London barefooted, her expensive heels swinging in her hand. She knew the pavements were dirty, but she couldn't bring herself to care. There were few cars on the streets and the silence almost unnerved her. She could hear their soft breathing.
They were walking aimlessly. And for now, she didn't really care.
A few minutes later, he looked at her sideways asking, "Where are you staying?"
"I live in a rented studio apartment. It's a ten minute walk from here. I've been living here a month now." She looked at him but his face was calm and un-responsive. He had obviously heard about her travelling.
Damn Ren and his blabbing mouth!
He nodded slowly, his chocolate brown hair appearing almost black under the street lights.
"I'll walk you." It was a statement, not a question. She didn't bother arguing.
They continued walking in silence with her leading the way, a few people staring at her naked feet. She pointed out a few nice restaurants and other places that she had come to be acquainted with. There were couples and friends coming out of restaurants and bars, obviously having a good time. It was Friday, after all.
She found herself smiling all the way home.
They reached her apartment too soon, and she realized that she may never see him again.
It pained her heart all over again, but this time she was prepared for it. This was how they would always be. She had stopped giving and he had stopped expecting.
"Do you want to come up? For a cup of coffee maybe?" Her eyes looked searchingly into his.
"No. I have to go. I have a flight in a few hours." He shook his head, almost regretfully. But he didn't offer any more information.
She nodded quietly. She had expected this. Nothing had changed.
And it was alright.
The pain had reduced considerably in the past few years. The dull ache persisted, but she knew it was natural. She had stopped thinking about him that often. She thought about him suddenly. Like when she was out shopping and suddenly saw a tie or shirt that would look good on him. Or when she saw flower petals blowing in the wind. Or when she was out fighting and suddenly felt the lack of his presence. Or when she saw someone eating ramen noodles.
He appeared suddenly, flashbacks of memory triggered by small things.
But she had never forgotten him. She hadn't forgotten loving him.
She had just stopped expecting. Stopped giving. Stopped hoping.
Ayano lived in reality, not in fantasy. It had turned her into a better person. She was honest with herself and with others. She had quit living in a daze. She had woken up. She had taken action.
She had no regrets. She lived every day as it came, not uprooting the past, not caring about her future.
Ayano was happy.
"Have a nice flight." Her hair, now short and wavy, blew around her face in the slight breeze.
"I hope I will." He didn't mention that night all those years ago. He didn't need to. They both remembered. She knew it.
She turned and walked into the lobby of her building. He had taken flight, his feet slightly above the ground.
"Kazuma." He looked at her, his hair falling into his forehead, his eyes looking beautiful in the moonlight.
"It was nice seeing you again." And this time, she genuinely meant it.
"Me too, Ayano." He smiled at her and she smiled back, before he disappeared in his wind.
She stood there a few minutes before turning and going upstairs.
Tomorrow was a new day.
I sure enjoyed writing this chapter. Hope you enjoyed yourself just as much.
Wish me luck for my college days! Hope they're crazy and fun xD
Please give my new story 'Akagami No Noroi: The Curse Of The Crimson Hair' just as much love and support that you've given this one and all the others. It will not be a waste of time, you can count on that. And yes, this is a shameless promotion, but who cares really? *grins*
Please review! Thank you!~
Until Next Time!