Esme P.O.V

I feel really bad for just showing up at Carlisle house like that. I just really didn't know what to do and I had to tell Carlisle about Charles. He's the only person who knows about him and I want to keep it that way. But it's over now, Charles can't hurt me no more. At least I hope so. After Carlisle helped me with my bruises, I ask him to be alone for a moment. I need to be alone with my thought. I'm standing in front of the mirror in Carlisle guest room. I look awful . I tried to hide the bruises with makeup but we still can see it. My hair and my face are a mess. Silent tears started running down my cheeks . Do you ever get the feeling when you're really down , but can't bring yourself to be completely happy? When I left Charles, it took a while , but I got over everything he did. Seeing him again, brought all this again. I feel.. useless, ugly, not worth it. Why would Carlisle even look at me ? I admited to myself that I really do like Carlisle and I know he will never hurt me , but I can't help myself to be scared. He will never feel the same way.

- I'm nothing... I whisper to myself in the mirror.

- Esme why would you say that? I jumped at Carlisle's voice.

I turned around surprised.

Was he spying on me?

- I'm sorry, I just came to see if you were ok and I heard you talk. He said while scraching the back of his neck nervously.

- Oh... umm... It's ok.. i'm sorry . I said looking away embarressed.

Carlisle walked up to me and put a finger under my chin making me look at him. His eyes were full of love and a bit of pain.

- Esme, love , why would you say that now?

I just looked at him. Unsure of what to say. He sigh.

- Esme , please I just want to help.

- I .. I don't know Carlisle. I'm just... after all the years of Charles telling how useless and ugly I am... and now seeing him again. It's hard.

I could feel the tears burning in my eyes again.

Carlisle took my hands in his and looked me right in the eyes.

- Esme... it's killing me to see you like that. remember what I said? Don't believe a word that this bastard said. You are the most amazing women i've never met. I l...

He seems to be hesitating. He let go of one of my hands and rub the back of his neck. A thing he does when his nervous. I looked at me confused and squeeze his hand for support.

- I... I really like you Esme. You're a great friend. I'll do anything to help you until you believe me.

A part of me is disappointed that he said that.

Of course he doesn't feel the same.

I tried my best to hide the disappointment.

He wrapped his arms around and pulled me into him. I inhaled his sent while he smoothly carrased my hair.

After what seems to be an eternity , I cleared my troat and pulled away from his embrace.

- Thank you again Carlisle. I think i'm going to go home now. I really appreciate everything you did for me. I said with a fake smile.

A flash of disappointment crossed his face

- Oh. Don't need to thank me Esme. I will do anything to help you. Do you want me to drive you home?

I shook my head

- No, it's ok thank you. I smiled at him. I'll see later.

I gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before walking out of his room.

I need to figure everything out right now.

Do I really want to be with Carlisle? Yes

Am I ready? I don't know

Does he like me back? Probably not

I'm just going go home and try to think about other stuff. Forget about Charles and after try to figure out everything with Carlisle. Plus, Monday is the birthday of my little Andrew who died 1 year ago... I'll go see him after work. It's a long drive but I have to see him.

I shook my head and started the car.

*Skip to monday morning*

Carlisle P.O.V

I'm so worried about Esme. We haven't talk since she came at my house . She haven't reply of any of my text or calls. I'm so scared that I said something wrong or pushed her away. I just need to see her to make sure she's ok. I almost told her that I love her ... but I couldn't. not now. She will think I'm taking avantage of her . I know she need space right now, and I will respect that,but I need her to know that i'm here for her when she's ready. I'm walking in circle in my office thinking about Esme, it's now 8:00.

No need to panick Carlisle.

Esme should be here any minutes. but I know that if she not here or anything happened to her i'll never forgive myself.

- Carlisle?

Esme!

- Oh god you're ok. I mean.. great you're here.

Way to go...

It took everything I had not to just run up to her and hug and kiss her right and there.

She laugh.

oh how I laugh her laugh.

- Where would I be? silly you. Yes i'm fine.

I turn my head totally embarressed.

I heard her sigh.

- Carlisle, i'm sorry I didn't text or called you back. I needed to be alone and think some... things throught.

- It's ok. I'm sorry I panicked .. I was just worried about you.

She smiled at me. I smiled back.

Before she could reply a nurse came rushing in .

- ! We need you in the room 3. Emercengy! She said screaming.

I putted on my doctor face and followed the nurse with Esme behind me.

When I got there I saw a men laying on the table , around 40's . bleeding hard and unconcious.

All the doctors and nurses were rushing around.

- Everyone stop. Mindy go get him 10 ml of morfine . Dr Shcmitd plug him in , James and I will stop the bleeding and we'll do a transportation after. He's loosing too much blood we're going to lost him. Dr. Denali you do resuscitation. (I DON'T KNOW ANY OF THESE THINGS haha No judment... ) I told everyone and we got to work.

I looked at Esme who was looking at the scene... surprisinly not horrifed but more like... impressed and full of respect

. I felt the need to show off to her at that moment. I have no ideas what came over me. I was doing anything I could to save the man's life and I knew Esme was watching. I had to do this.

5 hours later, we were finally done. The man was finallt stabilize. I ran my finger in my hair as I exited the room. I saw Esme sitting with a young child , she smiled brighlty at him as she told him he could go home now. I just stayed there for a while,watching her.

Wow. That doesn't sound creepy at all.

She finally noticed my presence and got up. She wave at the kid and walked toward me looking worried.

- Is he going to be ok?

I smile at her

- He should be fine. We got him stabilize. How about you? How did it go with the rest of your patients? I'm sorry I wasn't there to help you.

- Hush Carlilse. You saved the man life. She said while pushing me playfully

- but, it went pretty good actually.

- That's great Esme. Soon , you won't need me anymore. I said trying to hide my sadness and disappoinment ... but I failed.

- Well I leaned from the best . She said winking.

I chuckled. She deninitly knew how to make me smile.

- Why thank you dear .

- I must say. it was pretty impressive seeing you like that. You're an amazing doctor Carlisle. You were amazing out there. She said looking at me with such admiration in her eyes. I swear I never wanted that look in her eyes to go away.

I could feel the blood rush in my head. I prayed that she didn't noticed my blushing.

- You flattered me to much Esme. I said as I poke her nose.

She giggle. I'm glad my Esme is back.

- Well I won't make you stay any longer. You must be tired.

I was actually, but I didn't want to her to know that.

- Not that bad. I get use to it, but Samuel gave me and the afternoon off after this and he said that I've working too much and if i'm still here in minutes i'll be a dead man.

She laugh quietly.

- Well then I won't keep you any longer , Have a good afternoon.

I smiled at her. Feeling a bit sad that I have to leave. I wanted to stay with her.

- And you too .

With one last look at her, I headed to my office to get my things and change.

As I walked to the exit, I heard Esme and Sarah talk at the reception and I heard my name in the conversation. I stopped on my track and listened to what they are saying. I knew it wasn't any of my business but I was curious to know what Esme had to say about me.

- Come on Esme! I saw you two together and the way he looks at you. He's so into you.

Am I that obvious?

- Plus , I heard you went at his house this weekend!

- Wait how do you know that? I mean, Pff... Me at Carlisle house? like pff.. whaaaaat... no. we're just friends. I heard Esme say.

- That's beside the point and you're a terrible liar Esme.

I could imagine Esme rolling her eyes at that. I chuckled quietly.

- Esme! Please. Just admit it. You guys are totally flirting! and he flirts back. He had never done this to anyone before Esme. Every girls in the hospital are drooling over him !

I blushed once again. It's kind of true.. I may have some admiraters, but I only have eyes for Esme.

Oh god.. I'm in deep. I will be crush if she doesn't feel the same.

- Just make a move . He never showed any interest in anyone here except you. Go for it.

I waited nervously for Esme answer.

- Okay fine. I really do like Carlisle. Like.. like-like him.

I brain stopped. She likes me back. I'm pretty they could ear how fast my heart is beating from where they're standing. I never smilled that widely in my entire life.

- but, he made it clear that he only wanted to be friends.

My smile fadded.

No .

This can't be happening.

- So I will respect his decision . Nothing more than friends.

- But Esme! I heard Sarah reply obviously mad.

- No but, now if you'll excuse me, I have patients to see.

and with that she started walking in the opposite direction to see her patients.

That's it. I made my decision. I will tell Esme how I feel and I will do it tomorrow.

* Hey guys! I'm about to start a new story after this one, probably about Elizabeth and Peter ( real life story ) and an other Esme and Carlisle fanfiction. I'm not sure yet, so I want you guys to tell me what you would like to see ! Please review and stay tune for the rest of the story

Love xo Clo *