Kattrin felt like she was being stabbed with every breath she took and with each footfall that carried her forward. Carver limped along behind her. Anders was clutching his torso and grimacing with every step. She and Anders had taken turns healing everyone, but the dragon has still taken its toll on the group. Carver had taken a claw to the knee. Anders had healed it but walking had reopened the wound. Anders had his ribs broken by the spiders. Kattrin had healed him but he'd broken them again rolling away from the dragon. Kattrin had been knocked into the stone walls by the dragon's tail and she was pretty certain that her ribs were broken, too. Varric was the only one who had avoided real injury.

Kattrin moved over to Carver to heal him again. It was evident that Carver was in a lot of pain because he didn't complain about it. She removed his pain and pulled the gash closed again. Then she moved over to Anders. His ribs were still knit together but the cartilage between them had torn. She removed his pain and repaired the damage. Thankfully, they were getting close to the camp. Even if Bartrand demanded they keep moving, the three of them would be able to ride in one of the carts until they fully healed.

They emerged from the tunnel to see the fires of the camp. Varric took the lead, quickening their pace until he'd located Bartrand.

"Bartrand!" he called, cheerily. "We found a way around your damned cave-in!"

Bartrand looked angrily relieved, if such and expression were possible. Maker, he reminded her of Carver. Curiously, she glanced over to Carver. He grimaced with pain while glaring at everyone moving about camp. She sighed.

"It's about time!" Bartrand muttered.

He looked about camp and shouted, "Let's move out!"

As the camp came to life with people striking tents, gathering supplies, dousing fires, Varric motioned Kattrin to follow him. They walked through the hustle and bustle over to where Bohdan was looking over Sandal.

Sandal was cleaner than he had been when they found him. Bohdan was gently moving Sandal's head from side to side so he could check for injury.

Hearing footsteps, Bohdan turned. Grinning, he moved toward Kattrin, taking her hand and shaking it exuberantly. Pain ignited her whole being. "You found him! I can't believe it, you found him!"

"Hello," Sandal said, smiling.

Bohdan became serious. "I owe you a great debt. I will repay you somehow – I swear my life on it!"

She looked at Bohdan and thought, I'm glad to help.

Out loud, she said, "No need. I'm glad Sandal was all right."

Bohdan solemnly nodded. "Because of you. You will not regret this!"

He turned to Sandal. "Say thank you to the nice lady for saving your life, Sandal."

Sandal's eyes welled and his lip quivered. "Thank you," he said.

Varric spoke. "Bodhan, my friends have been injured while scouting the passages. Would you be willing to allow them to ride in your cart until they recover?"

"Absolutely!" the older dwarf exclaimed. "It would be my pleasure!"

As carefully as they could manage, the helped Carver and Anders into the cart. Kattrin tried to keep the pain from her face. After the fight with the dragon, Anders had been too exhausted to heal her completely. Kattrin had been using magic to remove her own pain but she, too, was approaching her magical limits. It was becoming increasingly difficult to access the Fade. Of course it didn't escape Varric's notice.

"You, too, Hawke. Up you go."

She opened her mouth to protest but the dwarf was right. Habit forced her to continue attempting to hide her injuries, but if she didn't rest she wouldn't be able to protect anyone or help in any way. Grudgingly, she stepped up into the cart. Anders was in one of the far corners and Carver was directly opposite him. She decided to sit between them, on Anders' side.

She felt Anders eyes on her from the moment she climbed into the cart until she sat down. Kattrin continued to feel his eyes on her but refused to look at him. She felt his magic caress her, searching for injuries. Her failing to sense him reach into the Fade measured how exhausted she really was. Anders sighed heavily.

"Come here," he said quietly, offering his right hand.

Maker, she was tired. Ignoring his hand, she rose to her knees. She gritted her teeth to stifle a groan while trying to ignore the protests from her body. She faced him, keeping her eyes on the bed of the cart, and sat between his outstretched legs.

His hand was gentle as it ran down her left side, even though it shook a little. Cooling magic seeped into her from both sides, removing her pain while mending her broken ribs. Kattrin hadn't noticed his other hand on her right side until after his magic faded. She remained seated, her heart pounding in her chest.

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to fully heal you," he said, removing his hands.

She looked up to see him looking away.

"Anders, we managed to take down a dragon. I'm as exhausted as you are, so I promise I understand."

He looked up at her, searching her face. "You healed Carver and then me instead of yourself."

Kattrin looked down at her lap, twining her fingers together. It wasn't a question but she still felt compelled to answer. Because you were injured before the fight began and rolling around on the stone to dodge a dragon worsened your injuries. Because you used the last of your reserves after the fight on healing Carver. Because after I healed you taking away my own pain drained what little magic I had left. Because he's my brother and I have to look after him. Because healing you is more important than healing myself.

While she was agonizing over what to say, she felt Anders reach out with that extra sense that spirit mages possessed. It was as if Anders presence grew and flowed around her. She looked up but his eyes were looking through her, unfocused. Then the feeling was gone. His eyes focused on her, searching her face. He brought up his hand and cradled her cheek in his palm. "It's all right, Hawke."

It felt like someone was squeezing her heart while a flood of emotions threatened to choke her. It was both disarming and freeing to have someone understand her struggle to be the strong leader but also to be the caregiver and savior of not only her family, but her merry band of misfits as well. All while balancing what others expected or could tolerate from a mage. Kattrin swallowed while blinking back tears.

"Are you two done? I'd like to sit in peace without watching the two of you making eyes at each other."

Kattrin felt heat rush to her face and ears. She'd completely forgotten Carver was in the cart with them. She stood quickly just as the cart lurched into motion. First, she listed to the right before being pitched forward. Completely off balance, she scrabbled to grab onto anything to keep from falling. Strong, warm hands caught her.

Anders held her upright as the cart rumbled along the hardened dirt and stone pathways. While providing a counterweight for her balance, he guided her to sit between his legs. His torso and ribs screamed with the movement but he ignored it. Once she was settled, he felt her magic probe the surly warrior for injuries. Satisfied that Carver was physically doing well, Anders felt her magic turn to him. He shook his head. This woman made sure everyone else was tended to before looking to care for herself and couldn't even admit to it. He told himself that was the reason he made such an effort to make sure she was take care of. That it had nothing to do with how he felt about her.

They rode in silence as the cart trundled along, swaying with the movement. She leaned against him, her right shoulder in the hollow between his left arm and his chest. His arms were wrapped loosely around her. He was concerned about their repeated physical closeness since entering the Deep Roads but he needed it. She kept him sane and centered and acted as a barrier against the taint within him. The taint that echoed inside him, growing stronger with each step down into the depths.

And in this moment, he was sure she needed the closeness, too. He'd felt her vulnerability when he'd reached out with his senses. She'd gone from pragmatism to guilt to concern. Overwhelming relief had flooded her when he'd reassured her. Again he was reminded of the Warden Commander and how she'd confided in him when the burdens of leadership conflicted with the wellbeing of their friends. He wished that she would pay better mind to herself, even if it meant her welfare above others, but he couldn't push her to go against her nature.

Isolated within the wooden and cloth confines of the cart while nestled safely amongst the others of the expedition, Anders felt himself drifting. Kattrin's warmth only increased his drowsiness. Giving into the momentary calm and soothing company, Anders closed his eyes and allowed his mind to slip into the Fade.

He was first aware of the sensation of soft warmth. Next the low sounds of sleep weaving through the cavern. He opened his eyes. Scattered small fires burned in the darkness, casting both light and shadow on the canvas of the cart. Looking through the opening, Anders spotted dwarves and humans clustered around the low flames, all fast asleep. He noticed Carver, Varric, Bodhan, and Sandal around the closest fire. Kattrin was still asleep in his lap. One blanket had been draped over her, another had been bundled and placed behind his head. Alert now, he reached out to find darkspawn but found none. They were safe for the moment.

His healer's instinct kicked in and he pulled mana from the Fade to check her injuries. Her ribs were healing along with her bruised organs. Still, he soothed any agitated nerves to ensure she experienced no pain.

Anders looked at her head nestled in his shoulder. He gazed down past the carefully coiled and pinned hair to the fine dark brows, then to the dark feathered lashes twitching with dreams. He listened to the slow cadence of her breathing. Her rosy lips were barely parted, stark contrast to her pale cheeks. Her left arm was curled around his waist, her right hand on his chest with his resting atop it. Her hips rested between his outstretched legs, her legs curled up and over his left leg. His errant right hand had settled on her hip, which he relocated to her shoulder.

With his arms still wrapped around her, he leaned in to smell her hair. An old yet unfamiliar feeling suffused him. As he lay with the sleeping woman in his arms, strange memories arose of another time and place, of another woman. The beautiful woman with the heart shaped face, with skin the color of fresh milk, eyes the color of the sky, and hair the color of wheat ready for the harvest. Aura.

For a moment his heart ached with loss before he regained himself. Justice had been forced into possessing the corpse of a former Gray Warden, Kristoff. Kattrin appearing in his life had caused a resurgence in Justice's recollection of Kristoff's memories, including those of his wife, Aura. Anders still wasn't sure if these rising memories indicated the beginning of Justice's acceptance of Kattrin or another reason for Anders to stay away from her.

He pushed thoughts of Justice and foreign memories away. He was constantly reminded of why he couldn't have her in his life, but he couldn't seem to let her go.

Anders leaned down again, smelling wood smoke, earth, and something distinctly Kattrin. No traces of the flowery scent he'd come to associate with her. The Deep Roads little afforded luxuries such as regular bathing. He was sure he didn't smell like a flower, either. He gently pulled her closer and kissed her hair. Still sleeping, she exhaled a contented sigh.

He didn't understand why he'd awoken but she had kept the nightmares at bay. He knew he should take advantage of some much needed sleep while Kattrin warded him against monsters, but he didn't. Instead, he remained awake, cherishing this secret moment. It would fade in a few hours, when everyone began to rise and strike camp, or when his conscience awoke and chided him for his selfishness. But right now it was just him and Kattrin, peaceful and safe in the Deep Roads, of all places. Just him and her, quietly embracing in a transient perfect world.