AN If U FLAM ur obvuslee a DUFUS!
More so than you? At least I can spell those words correctly: "If you flame, you are obviously a doofus."
Ooh, doofus. Busting out the big girl words here.
BY THE WAY, I LUV U DARREL
CHAPTRe 17: DA SURTIN CERUMONEE
Prufesur mcDonold tuk us into the dining rume. "DIS WER U will b surtd,' MCGNALD" she sed sadly.
Why are you sad? Oh, because you know you will have to deal with Jo for the next seven years?
Poor McDonald. Her name has lost several letters. She is now MCGNALD. the vowels have fled for safety.
She tuK us INTO da rume. AT the end of da hall der waz a cowboy hat on a stull. IT luked relly cull. HARMONY sed, "OOOH I'm exited."
So you're absolutely sure that you aren't basing this off of the United States South? (America is the continent; USA is the country. Fun fact.)
DEN Da surtin hat sang. "IM THE HAT! IM THE HST! EIM DA HAT! IM DA HAT! IM DA… … … … … … Hat!11111111111111111111111111111
Hello? Jo? Dora the Explorer called. She wants her song back.
Den it sand, Der ar 4 hoses wer u will go. STI NKy slithern iz 4 da luser NOURTHURNERS!1111111 AND BLAK GAE UGLLEE PEPPles. DATs da wurst hose,
The sausage hose. Sounds legit.
Blak gae ugllee puppies? That's just rude. Puppies don't do ugly.
DEN b nm DEN drs ravenclawed wer da clever suthernors go. Den ders hufflpuf wer da butiful suthernurs go/ DEN DERS GRIFFYNDER!111111111111111 DATS WER DA BUTIFUL, CLEVER nd BRAVE suthenurs go.
A million dollars that Jo is going to sort herself into "Griffynder".
Plot twist: jo goes to "slithern". Also, if "Griffynder" has both brave, clever, and beautiful southerners, while "ravenclawed" and "hufflpuf" take clever and beautiful respectively, why is Griffynder stepping on their turf? Besides a reason for jo to be all of the above.
Den Prufessur mcdonald called mi nam. HE
McDonald is just not having a good day. Now she has turned into a he.
sed, "JO BELLE POTTR!"
jo bekke ran up to te stag.
Harry! No casting Patronuses!
I put mi cowbuy hat on mi hed. "Oh," da sutin hat sad.
Your hat? Jeez jo, don't get greedy here.
"UR jo BElke poter. Ur pretti, nd clever. UR also brav. UR NOT 1 OV DOSE STUPID GAE BLAK NURTHERNURS! so u shuld go in GRINFINDUR!"
What happened to Griffynder?
Evrybodee chered 4 me cuz I luk relly cut. Den I sat down at greffendur. DEN Sum1 RAN IN DA rume!
With a chainsaw. And he used it to murder Jo. All of the students cheered. The end.
"LISEN UP DUFUSES!" IT WAZ… …. … … … … … … … … .. …. … … … … … … …. …. … . ….. SNALE!
If Snape uses a demeaning insult like that, it will not be doofuses. It will be dunderheads.
Very true. And since Jo is related to James, maybe he'll dislike her as much as he dislikes Harry in the books. Maybe. But with more lethal results.