A/N: I just realized I lied to everyone about the pic last chap, sorry bout that, but NOW the picture should be there. And here it is, the event that inspired this whole story (the beginning part at least)

Disclaimer: I'm laughing so hard right now, oh god, I don't think I'll be able to write this disclaimer, aka: I got lazy...and couldn't think of a quirky response

Creepy wake up calls, nude evenings, and unusual nights

I stared.

What the hell is that?

The crack in the ceiling was larger, as the scratching grew more quick and intense.

My eyes widened in horror as blood seeped through.

What the hell is that?!

I lay frozen to the bed, hands gripping the white sheets underneath me, blood dripped onto my face.

Some parts of the wall gave way, giving me a view of...worms? They wiggled erratically sensing a way out, I held my breath unable to force myself to move, as they bunched into the opening.

Blood dripped down the squirming lengths, as they inched forward bit by bit, showing that they were all connected at the end.

A hand...

A bloody hand stuck out of the ceiling the nails were missing from the bloody stubs, writhing and reaching aimlessly toward me, I leaned into the bed as hard as I was able, a slender wrist and kimono covered arm shoved itself free. Well at least she isn't naked I stared morbidly as it struggled to reach me, blood dripping in waves down the arm, soaking my hair and getting into my eyes, long black hair peeked out of the large forming crack, more fingers wriggled through the hole muffled words accompanying.

Trembling and breathing heavily, unevenly, I didn't hear as the door was opened, nearly snapped off its hinges.

"Koori-chan, Tobi wanted to wake you early, so you wouldn't be late for the mission!" A muffled voice exclaimed.

"Come with me, comewithme, comewithme!"

"..."

"...Koori-chan?" The bed shifted slightly beside me, an orange mask half blocked the terrible thing above me. Tears dripped down the sides of my face, "Obito…" momentarily forgetting my manners, and that I was only supposed to know him as Madara. oops too late now "Obito, do you see the women?" I whispered fearfully, watching as the figure wriggled its shoulder out, afraid that if I spoke any higher she would lunge at me and whisk me away to hell.

He looked up, she clawed at his mask trying to move him out of the way smearing it with blood "there's nothing there Koori-chan" he said unsurly.

It isn't real.

"She's calling me, r-reaching for me", "eeh? She just wants to play patty cake Koori-chan!" He crouched down beside the bed peering at my face sadistic bastard.

She was now hip free and straining, I reached up hesitantly to the bloody maiden with a trembling hand, just as she herself was-

"come, come, come...with...me! Comewithme!"

-My fingers bumped into a gloved hand before our fingers could touch, I blinked rapidly startled "come on or you're going to be late! I've got your shoes" he yanked me out of bed, I stumbled and crashed to the floor gasping for air was I holding my breath?

I walked down the hall in a daze "I brought Koori-chan like leader-sama wanted, Tobi is a good boy!", "good, you may leave now Tobi-san" the puppet gave me a glance "OK!" he exclaimed, my geta dropped with clunks, Tobi skipped away merrily now that his task was done. "Oy! Why is the bitch coming leader?!"

I coughed.

"Because I know exactly where he is..." everyone turned to look at me, I was on my butt putting on my shoes, on autopilot. I stood up brushing myself off, the effects of the room drifting out of my mind for the time being just another tuesday "...and I'm your best chance of convincing him to join us", "and why is that?" Kisame wondered. "He has a young boy traveling with him, a fellow Yuki clan member" I tapped my chest, his eyes widened slightly "another one?" Kisame asked incredulously, I nodded smirking slightly.

Kakuzu, Kisame, Hidan and I left the base soon after, our mission, recruit Momochi Zabuza demon of the hidden mist, and his partner haku of the Yuki clan.

Traveling across the country was boring, I tried amusing myself with eye spy but that drove me a little mad, I started seeing cats in the bushes that weren't there, it distracted me enough that I tripped over a branch I was going to land on, I almost face planted but Kisame caught me in time. He was probably the only one in the group that cared enough to help me, Hidan laughed at my clumsiness and Kakuzu ignored my presence altogether.

On the 5th day of running and sleeping in the wilderness, everyone started getting quite stale, so we all agreed (except for Kakuzu-sama) to go an inn the next night, it was super lucky this one had a natural hot springs, I could use a long soak for my aching muscles.

I froze in the doorway, a thin towel wrapped around my lithe frame, men and women were littered across the warm waters, most of them civilians, my companions at the corner. I started walking over to a group of random women "Koori-san, over here!" Kisame called across the water I blushed heavily, I stopped then unwillingly treaded back to my comrades don't look at them don't look at them. "What's wrong?" Kisame asked puzzled "I'm afraid if I look, I won't think of you guys the same way again".

"You shy skank?" the religious zombie tugged at my towel I adjusted my hold, I blushed calm down koori, it's nothing you haven't seen before...but they'll see…I sighed, and slowly released my death grip on the towel, letting it drop around my hips, I closed my eyes and turned away slightly face burning, I felt their eyes inspecting me "neh, Koori-san how did you get that scar?". Sure I have scars all over my body, but what ninja doesn't? No he was asking about that one, I put a hand over my heart which did nothing as it was still very much visible from my back.

I cleared my throat, "bounty hunters from kiri...they caught a whiff of my mothers trail, which wasn't surprising since she flaunted her powers." I looked over to their faces dully "she had two kids to take care of, and she put us in harms way for bravado, she deserved to die...but that didn't stop me from trying to save her, I took a sword to the heart that was meant for her gut, but it went through. I rubbed at the phantom pain " She fought till she died, and since I was albino colored so different from the rest of the clan, they didn't bother taking my head, and so they left me there to die in a pool of our blood. "I wasn't afraid to die, I was more afraid for what would come after..." I whispered.

Hidan then ruined my pity party "I'd still screw you despite the scars and small tits, you've got a nice ass" I turned an ugly red, and whipped around "as if I would ever-" my eyes wandered, I quickly covered my nose his young strong body is tempting though. Hidan smirked, Kakuzu rolled his eyes, and Kisame facepalmed, my eyes widened "I-I didn't say that out loud, did I?"

When Hidan started to move towards me, I sputtered trying to hold him back with a hand.

Thinkthinkthink OH!.

"Y-you better watch your own ass Hidan-sama!" I pointed "did you know it was common practice for samurai to screw their younger disciples?!" They all froze, Kakuzu's head turned towards me oh-so-gradually.

Wait...

I flung my wet towel at the stitched man's face and scrambled out of the water, the hot springs chilling due to my blind panic.

Black threads shot from his body, everyone in the spa freaked and ran to the safety of their rooms, with me hot on their heels, a shrill screech escaped my throat as they wrapped around my ankles, dragging me back to the pool. Ow god my boobies!

I clawed at the rocky floor "I didn't mean it!" I managed to scream before he dragged me under.

After our fun water adventure, we went inside to dry off, because of the epidemic we caused the owner and his wife gave us anything we needed, the poor guy was about to pee himself "so s-sake for the men...and milk for the child?"

I covered my mouth, memories filled my vision "Boobs! She still forced me, no matter how much I struggled to get away!" I clasped my hands together "please give me mikan chuhai" "aren't you a little too young though kid?" he asked hesitantly "I'm a ninja I can drink if I want to damn it!" I slammed my palms on the tabletop, the waiter jumped. "Koori" I turned eyes sparkling "...shut up" I pouted crossing my arms "and you get sake and a glass of milk for the girl" he scrambled off with a 'yes sir' "ehhhh?!" I squawked.

"You won't grow strong and healthy if you don't drink your milk" he was smirking under his mask I just knew it, this is because I called you a fagot isn't it? I rubbed at my eyes "you don't know how traumatizing it is being forced to suck on a boob" Kisame and Hidan gave me amused smiles, I deadpanned "You guys are sick, I'm going to sleep".

"We're leaving after the drink" "ehhhh?!" this time it was the whole group "we've wasted enough time already, and time-" "-is money, the fuck Kakuzu who the fuck put you in charge?!" Hidan stood in outrage, "I thought we would be able to sleep till morning?" I added slumping in my chair, "here are your drinks" "yeah...thanks" Kisame responded with a sigh, the owner returned then went back to the kitchen to hide.

"No fuck this!" all the drinks but the milk went crashing to the floor, I discreetly bumped the table causing it to spill off the side, the zombie walked off to the bedrooms he paused turning around "Kakuzu, go suck a dick".

The table flipped, and I tripped over myself to get behind Kisame, trying to stay out of the ensuing fight.

"Are they always like this?" I groaned, "yup come on, we probably have time for a quick nap" he yawned.