Chapter 12

Knowing what to expect helped a little, Kagami admitted. Of course, there wasn't a whole lot he could do when the horrible symptoms of withdrawal started cropping up in earnest in the days that followed that first visit to the clinic, but that didn't stop him from trying his damnedest to ease Aomine's difficulty; providing him with aspirin, hot water bottles, cool towels, and whatever else he could think of. He knew he was barely even making a dent in the pain his lover was experiencing, let alone what was to come, but he kept telling himself resolutely that this had to happen. Aomine was suffering, but he was also healing slowly. And Kagami hoped he wouldn't have to bear the full brunt of it unarmed, when it decided to hit...he hoped his request for methadone therapy would go through before then.

When they'd gotten back from the clinic, Kagami had all but turned the apartment upside down, cleaning out every trace of Aomine's "girl" that he could find; raiding the usual stashes and interrogating Aomine relentlessly about the rest. When the bluenette finally snapped that he wanted it gone too and would throw it all out himself if he could bend down without feeling like he was going to puke, Kagami knew for sure that he wasn't lying, and all of it was really disposed of this time. Which meant no temptation, but it also meant no safety net to fall back on, if things got really bad. Kagami supposed that was for the best. Personally he'd gone through enough self-loathing to last him a lifetime, and he really didn't want to start this vicious cycle all over again...for Aomine's sake.

Something else was different this time as well; the two of them weren't on their own, battling this mess. Momoi showed up on the second day, basically inviting herself over to Kagami's apartment, but he certainly wasn't going to complain. Especially because she'd brought movies and soup ("I didn't make it, don't worry," she'd reassured Kagami when she caught the wary look he had shot her; all too familiar with the atrocity of her cooking). She said it was what she normally brought to Aomine when he was sick, and Kagami had welcomed not only the experience she had dealing with him, but the possibility of her getting him to eat something...he hadn't since the night he vanished, and whatever nutrients had been given to him via I.V in the hospital probably weren't satisfactory for a person of his size and metabolism.

She'd hesitated in the doorway to the apartment, one foot rubbing over the other self-consciously, something almost like guilt in her eyes, "Would it be okay...I mean...can I see Dai-chan?"

"Of course," Kagami shrugged, leading her to the bedroom, "But you might have to watch your step around him; he'll probably be pissy if we wake him up." Aomine had been bed-ridden since he got back from the clinic - on Kagami's orders - and though he'd protested and complained often that he was bored out of his skull, Kagami's mind was more at ease knowing he wasn't going to lose his unstable footing and collapse, and he'd said the exhausted bluenette could feel free to sleep as much as he wanted, if he was able. He was at his boyfriend's side whenever he had a spare minute, and he had a lot more of those since he'd called his boss and asked for some time off his job to handle a family emergency….even if Aomine wasn't technically family, he was as good as, and Kagami hadn't wanted to specify the details. He'd gotten his break from work, and that was that.

Knocking on the door with his knuckles, Kagami eased it open and glimpsed Aomine sprawled in a tangle of blankets on the bed, eyes closed, a magazine lying open on his chest, though Kagami doubted his attempts to read it had been fruitful. His dark eyes squinted open, and then roved over to the door with a mix of irritation and discomfort.

"What?" he grumbled.

"Rise and shine; you have a visitor," Kagami said cryptically, ushering Momoi in before following behind, taking his place at the foot of the bed, observing Aomine and taking stock of his current physical state. The bowl beside the bed was empty, but he looked nauseous nonetheless, and the slight twitching of his eyebrow indicated either a headache or a stomachache, or both. He was haggard, dripping with sweat despite the towel draped across his forehead, his eyes tired and listless as they roved over Momoi with a dull kind of curiosity.

"Wonderful…" he rasped, with a shaky attempt at sarcasm.

Kagami glanced at their company as well; Momoi looked appalled, concerned...and Kagami thought he saw an unnatural shine to her bright eyes that suggested gathering tears. He remembered she hadn't seen Aomine in quite some time...and certainly hadn't seen the frail, pitiful state he'd sunk to in the last few days.

"Dai-chan…" she swallowed and took a step closer to the bed, putting on a watery smile, "How are you feeling?"

Aomine expelled a short, harsh breath, "Like shit, Satsuki. ...Like c-complete, utter shit." He tried to sit up, Kagami could see it in the way he bent his legs and the muscles of his stomach clenched, but with a strained noise disturbingly close to a whimper of pain, he stopped and lay still again, taking slow, uneven gasps of air as if fighting back tears or vomit, Kagami wasn't sure which.

"Can't you do anything?" Momoi asked Kagami, voice wobbling a little, "He's in so much pain, he should be in the hospital…"

"He was just in the hospital," Kagami pointed out, "They sent him home."

"But he's sick -"

"There's no medicine for this," he interrupted before she could finish, "Or rather...they won't give it to him yet. There's nothing we can do but wait until he's approved, and suck it up until then."

Aomine gave a gravelly laugh, "Th-that's easy for you to say, Bakagami..."

"Shut up. You brought this on yourself, you know." Kagami retorted, refusing to be guilted by the jabs Aomine felt the need to keep throwing at him. He was learning to harden his heart, and it was just as well because while Aomine whined consistently about how awful he was feeling, Kagami knew he still didn't want or need his pity.

Momoi couldn't seem to tear her eyes away from Aomine, swallowing again, "I had no idea it was this bad, Dai-chan, it...it looks like you're dying…"

"Fuckin' feels like it..." Aomine muttered.

"Don't say that! Please don't -!" Momoi protested frantically, setting down the Tupperware container of soup and the DVDs she'd brought on the bedside table, and only when she'd sat next to him did Kagami realize it was because her hands were shaking too badly to keep holding the items steady.

Aomine's eyes lighted on the objects that had been placed beside him, and he reached over unsteadily, picking up one of the movies and flipping it over as if to read the back, "What's this?"

Clenching her delicate fingers on her knees, Momoi didn't look at him, but at the carpet as she responded, "I just brought some stuff, like when you had the flu when we were kids."

Chewing idly on his lower lip, Aomine looked up from the DVD box, and behind the hazy exhaustion and ache there was a hint of interest in his eyes, "This's a National Geographic special...I haven't watched that since I was like ten…"

"Well, I thought it might be more relaxing than whatever Kagamin's got." Momoi remarked.

Kagami frowned, "Hey, what's that supposed to mean?"

"Well considering you eat, sleep, and breathe basketball, I figured your only movies would be NBA recordings or something," she replied coolly, like the data analyst she was.

Kagami flushed and dropped his gaze, unwilling to admit the accuracy of her statement. Aomine, however, wasn't listening, returning his attention to scanning the backs of the DVDs, giving occasional, slurred mumbles to himself of "This is a newer one," or "I wonder if it's got the episode with the tide pools…"

Kagami's eyebrows lifted almost to his hairline upon witnessing his pacified boyfriend poring over the nature documentaries, nausea and bodily torment apparently - temporarily - forgotten, and he looked at Momoi incredulously, "How the hell did you do that?" he asked in a shocked whisper, "I haven't gotten him to calm down or take interest in anything since..." he trailed off, making a vague, demanding gesture.

"Easy," Momoi shrugged, "Dai-chan likes his nature. Or...he did when he was a kid; he used to drag me outside for hours to dig up crayfish and other things." Her nose wrinkled slightly in distaste, but there were fond memories sparkling in her eyes, of a younger, happier Aomine fearlessly venturing into the Japanese wilderness, hunting down cicadas and stag beetles and lizards. Kagami's chest felt tight with detached affection, picturing it, but he also felt a prickle of envy crawl over his skin. Momoi had grown up alongside a side of Aomine that he hadn't been so privileged to see; had known a time when he was cheerful, spirited, and carefree more often than not.

"H-hey, Kagami..." Aomine snapped him out of his thoughts when he spoke hoarsely, and he immediately turned to him, expectantly, "Can we watch these later...when Satsuki leaves? I haven't seen them in forever; th-there's this one with hammerhead sharks...and then there's the...there's the Amazon one with snakes and piranhas and this huge crocodile that -"

Kagami held up a hand to hold off the diligent if pathetically wavering list of animals, the corner of his mouth kicking up with amusement, "Sure, dumbass, but save your voice, alright? You're going to wear yourself out if you keep talking so much." Honestly it was rare to see him even a little enthusiastic about anything, especially now….Momoi must have had some kind of magic touch. Whatever it was, it was encouraging...especially since it had steered Aomine's thoughts - however briefly - away from dangerous waters. He hadn't mentioned his "girl", or anything directly leading to that subject, to Kagami in days, but it was plain to see that he still desperately wanted it...still warred with his craving for it that had thrown him into a world of miserable agony as of late. Any distraction from that was more than welcome.

Fidgeting, Momoi shot periodic, indecisive looks in Aomine's direction as he set down the DVD in his hand and shifted as if to try in vain to get comfortable. Pulling her plump lower lip between her teeth, she scooted a little closer to him, pink hair drooping to form curtains around her face as she dipped her head closer to his.

"Dai-chan…?" she asked tentatively. Aomine grunted a response, and after a moment's hesitation she went on, "Are you...going to be okay? Be honest."

Summoning a look of aloof assurance, Aomine shrugged stiffly, "Yeah. ...Come on, you know me better than that…" he trailed off, and his deep blue gaze dropped uncertainly, "Actually...uh…" he shoved a hand through his sweat-drenched hair and sighed, "...I dunno. Shit, it feels like I'm sh-shutting down...falling apart...but I mean...I guess it's got to get worse before it gets better."

Momoi blinked. Then she reached out and snatched the hand that had reached into his hair, turning his arm over and squinting at the inflamed scars on the inside of his elbow.

"What…?" she began.

"Needle marks," Kagami explained, in perfect monotone, before Aomine could give her the same bald-faced lie he'd given Kagami three years ago, "I'm guessing you hadn't noticed those before."

Aomine's mouth hardened to a thin line, and he fixed Kagami with a reproachful glare, but didn't say anything.

Momoi was also silent for a long moment, and Kagami saw her shoulders shake before she fell forward and buried her face against Aomine's chest, emitting quiet, hiccuping sobs and gripping his shirt in her hands. Kagami lifted a hand to stop her, but couldn't bring himself to drag her away, letting it fall back to the bed helplessly.

"Satsuki, uh -" Aomine began, voice tight with intense discomfort, but he was cut off by Momoi's anguished shouting.

"Why? Why why why, Dai-chan, w-why would you…?" she broke off when a fresh wave of tears surfaced, and then her tone switched from despair to anger, as she sat up slightly, hands still clutched in Aomine's sweat and tear-stained shirt, "Tell me why. What reason c-could possibly justify…?"

Aomine's mouth opened to speak, but he closed it again just as quickly, averting his gaze from her.

"You idiot!" she pounded a hand against his chest, tears still streaming as she followed the blow with another, ignoring Aomine's recoiling flinch and weak grunt of pain, trying and failing to escape her wrath, "If you really think you -!"

Snapping into action, Kagami interrupted, taking her wrists in his hands and pulling her away, though she fought violently against his restraining grip, "Sorry Momoi, but I can't let you add more damage. ...You don't really want to hurt Aomine; beating him up won't fix anything."

"S-stop defending him, Kagamin, this is not okay!" Momoi protested shrilly, scratching his forearms with her nails in an attempt to get free, "This is so far beyond okay, it's killing him!"

Kagami sat her back down, still gripping her wrists forcefully and looking into her eyes. He was distantly aware of Aomine behind her, half-sitting up and fighting for wheezing breaths after having the burden of her weight removed from his chest.

"And we're trying to stop it," he said steadily, "What happened happened, I saw all of it...but right now Aomine needs as little additional pain as possible while his body tries to heal. He's going to be okay. I'll make sure he is."

Momoi looked at him for a moment, and then hung her head, sniffling, "Sorry…" In the background, Kagami caught the sound of vomit hitting the bottom of the bowl he'd placed beside Aomine, and he winced. Aomine didn't have much in his stomach to bring back up, at this point it was probably just bile.

"I'm sorry, Dai-chan," now Momoi's voice was tiny, ashamed, and she didn't look up to properly deliver the apology to Aomine.

Letting go of her hands, Kagami stood up straight and moved over to his boyfriend, laying a hand on his shoulder blade and lightly rubbing his back, feeling the muscles tremble as he expelled his stomach's meager contents into the bowl. He couldn't be of use to Aomine until the vomiting stopped, when he would help cool him down and wash the taste out of his mouth...at times like these, he felt a little useless, but there was never a time that he couldn't be providing support, whether with words or just his presence. That would have to suffice for now.

"Easy, Aho…" he murmured, stroking up and down his back slowly, "I know it sucks, but it feels at least a little better when it's over, doesn't it?"

Aomine gulped a breath and sat back after a moment, panting and trying to grimace in revulsion at the same time, "You think….that's s-something….that methadone stuff w-will help?"

I have no clue what it'll do, but I hope so… "Yeah, I think so. Don't worry, we're going to get you on that stuff before you know it, we're just waiting on a call from the clinic."

"Wh-what if...they never call?" Kagami heard the question underneath; what he meant to ask: What if they call too late? What if it kills me first?

"They will." he didn't know where he got the comforting assurance in his voice, but he sure as hell used it to his advantage, "Just trust me. We didn't fill out all that paperwork for nothing... Now, let's get you some water and a cool towel, and then we'll see about putting on one of your nature specials, okay?" He got up to do just that, but stopped when Aomine spoke shakily, voice feeble and saturated.

"Kagami?"

He turned back around to see the bluenette looking at him with some mix of emotions he couldn't read.

"...Love you,"

It was said so quietly that he almost missed it, and almost fell off the bed when it hit him, heart pounding. Certain that he was flushing all the way down to his toes, he mumbled a reply, "I love you too."

Aomine leaned forward, lips slightly parted, but Kagami prevented the grateful kiss by stepping back, sticking his hands in his pockets sheepishly, "Brush your teeth before you kiss me, dumbass, you smell like a sewer. And I mean that in the nicest possible way."

Aomine snorted, but nodded and started to lie back down, clearly experiencing difficulty doing so with aching muscles and stiff joints.

Leaning down, Kagami gently touched his lips to his forehead, "Be right back."

He started to leave the room, and noticed Momoi had gotten up, lingering in the doorway. It took him a second to figure out that she wanted to talk to him alone, and he let her follow him to the kitchen, glancing at her over his shoulder expectantly.

"You really do love him, don't you?" she said slowly. Kagami said nothing, just fixing her with a look he hoped encompassed at least a portion of his feelings for Aomine. After a moment, she shifted and added, "Dai-chan's...lucky he's got you."

It was much the same statement the nurse had given him back at the hospital, but somehow it sounded different. The nurse had seemed to be saying Aomine was lucky to have someone like Kagami watching over him, because Kagami was apparently so great to stick by him faithfully and come to his aid, and Aomine should be thankful and count himself fortunate. He was a luxury, in that nurse's eyes, not a necessity….because she didn't know he was essentially the only thing Aomine had left.

Momoi, however, seemed to be saying something else; that Aomine was lucky he had anyone there at all, considering his actions...as if any sane person would have turned tail and fled long ago, leaving him all alone. And honestly, anyone else probably would have; Aomine had given Kagami more than enough reason to justify backing out, but he couldn't bring himself to...couldn't even bear the thought.

"He'll always have me," he muttered, almost to himself, as he got a glass down from the cabinet and held it under the faucet to fill it, "I'm not going anywhere."

.

.

The long-awaited call from the clinic finally came the following day, and not a moment too soon. Aomine's shaking had gotten so bad that he couldn't even hold the glasses of water Kagami tried to get him to drink from, and after the first one had shattered on the floor, Kagami started putting straws in them and holding them to his lips. He'd gotten him to drink the broth from the soup Momoi had brought in this manner, but Aomine had promptly thrown it back up in the middle of the night...Kagami hoped at least some of the nutrition had gotten into his system first. He didn't wake Kagami up with agonized screaming anymore, but that was because his voice had given out, and even when he tried to speak it was only in a raspy whisper.

He'd offered to carry him when it seemed like his legs wouldn't bear his weight - though he didn't look forward to the awkward prospect - but Aomine had managed to muster a scowl and shook his head, so Kagami supported him around the shoulders, and let him lean his weight on him, as he guided him through the revolving doors and into the clean white building. Hopefully, this time, they would get what they came for and leave successful.

"Ah, welcome back," the mellow voice of Doctor Sugawara greeted them, "I'm so glad you stopped by, come with me to my office and let's chat."

Kagami didn't waste breath replying, just got to his feet, and helped Aomine to his, wrapping an arm around his back and under his arms to hold him up. Glimpsing their sluggish, hampered progression down the hall, Sugawara slowed his own brisk pace and turned around, falling into step beside them instead.

"So tell me," the doctor prompted amiably, attempting to meet Aomine's downcast gaze, which was primarily keeping him from tripping over his own feet, "Have you used at all, the last two days?"

From directly beside him, Kagami saw Aomine's eyes blaze with anger, where they were typically listless and flat these days, "No." he said brittly, but Kagami heard the intended "fuck you" in his tone, and purposely stepped on his toes, trying subtly to remind him to check his temper in this place.

"Splendid," Sugawara remarked, oblivious to the nonverbal communication between them, "We'll just verify with a quick urine test, and if you're right, we'll see about your first dosage; sound good?"

Kagami almost heard Aomine bite his tongue to hold back a stinging retort, or possibly a full-scale tirade, depending on his level of frustration. He understood his boyfriend's impatience and irritation, and that the majority of it stemmed from his suffering, but he wouldn't condone it here, and gave Aomine another reproachful nudge with his foot.

"Fine." Aomine grit out, still not looking up from the floor. Kagami understood that too; he felt humiliated, being seen this way, unable to even stand on his own two feet without help, and on top of that he must have felt like he was being mocked and toyed with by Sugawara's unfazed, pleasant attitude. And obviously, the doctor was not just going to take Aomine's word for it, when he said he hadn't been using, but Kagami could almost sense how that distrust made Aomine's hackles bristle all the more; like it didn't even matter what he said in response, the answer would be the same. One thing the great Aomine Daiki hated was being disregarded.

He's not in such great shape now, though… Kagami thought ruefully, guiding Aomine into the comfortable room that he supposed was Sugawara's office, He won't hold out much longer on his own; we need this man's help to do this...otherwise I wouldn't feel much like cooperating either.

Sugawara followed and reached behind his desk, placing a small cup on top of it, "If I could just get a small urine sample…? The restroom is down the hall and to the left."

Kagami glanced at Aomine, feeling embarrassed heat rise to his cheeks, because he seriously doubted the bluenette could walk that distance on his own.

"Grow up, moron…" Aomine grumbled. He probably didn't sound as miffed as he wanted to with his voice at such a low, croaking volume, "H-he's not asking you to piss in a cup, now let's...let's get this over with…"

An awkward silence fell on them as they hobbled to the bathroom together, like participants in some poorly organized three-legged race, and Aomine only broke it once they were safely in the men's room, rolling the plastic cup between his hands absently.

"I can um...try to brace my weight against the wall, so you don't…h-have to stand next to me."

Kagami sighed, "Look, we've both seen each other naked all the time, I'm not embarrassed anym -"

"I'm not worried about that," Aomine interrupted quietly, and Kagami swore he saw a flush riding on his sweat-streaked cheeks, but he kept his head turned away, so it was difficult to be certain.

"Then what are you worried about?" he asked.

Clearly flustered - which was rare to see - Aomine shifted and bit his lower lip, and he made a vague gesture with his free hand, "I haven't… Fuck, I haven't had...the best...aim, since…" he trailed off, and the last two words were almost inaudible, the red staining his cheeks and the bridge of his nose very obvious now.

The admission was almost humorous, but Kagami didn't laugh at him, and as the color in his boyfriend's cheeks increased, he could feel the color in his own draining.

"So you're worried about splashing me, huh?"

Aomine shut his mouth so fast that Kagami heard his teeth click together, "...Something like that."

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Kagami gave a shaky chuckle, "Ah, hell with it. If that happens, I'll come up with something. Better than you ending up on your ass because you overestimated yourself. Fire away."

He felt Aomine's fist graze his cheek, but the collision didn't hurt, either because Aomine pulled the punch, or because his strength was so depleted that he couldn't put enough force behind it to sting.

"Asshole." the bluenette muttered, "Don't say it like that…"

Kagami did end up with a few spots on his jeans for his efforts keeping Aomine standing while he performed the task, but he figured he could explain it away as sweat or spilled coffee if he got any strange looks. Besides, once the sample was tested and came back clean of any traces of heroin, Doctor Sugawara pressed a square white pill into Aomine's hand.

"Cheers," he said brightly, giving him a new cup full of water to wash this first dose of methadone down.

Managing to keep hold of the two items with shaky hands, Aomine glanced at Kagami, then at the doctor, and shrugged grimly.

"...Cheers," he echoed, placing the pill between his lips and chasing it down with the water.

It wasn't as if he'd finally managed to get his hands on a miracle cure or anything, but Kagami couldn't help but feel heartened; encouraged by this step of progress. Maybe now days and nights wouldn't be so torturous, and he could start to really heal. Maybe now they could battle Aomine's addiction in earnest, and make it disappear. Maybe now they could set their sights on a new, bigger goal than just getting him through the day in one piece. After all, he was technically already clean, even if he didn't look or feel like it; the largest hurdle had been cleared...the next step was getting him to the point where he could live his life and function normally again...and beyond that, who knew? Maybe a happily ever after together was within their sights.

TBC