*A.N. – the chapter is finally ready, you have had no IDEA how hectic everythings been, it was my birthday a couple of days ago as well lol – but anyways, back to you guys – ENJOY [even though its kind of short]*
That night I concocted a plan, it was time to get back at particular people, starting with one of the easiest. His sadistic memory had recently been brought to my attention and it was time to do myself justice – it was time to payback Mike Newton.
When I arrived home that day, my mind insisted on wondering to what had a happened that day in biology, causing me to become extremely frustrated with myself, it had been my fear from blood which had clouded my judgement, the only reason I had allowed him to act like that towards me was because I had been so afraid. That's all. I told myself that over and over every time it popped into my head.
Charlie was busy again tonight with the same case that had made him late last night – he offered to ask if he could be spared for the night so he could take me out for food but I refused him, I wasn't the biggest fan of eating out, I could cook perfectly well at home and at least I would know for sure that I like my own cooking, and to be honest, I was sort of dreading the dinner out with Charlie, not really because of Charlie himself but because of the subjects I knew we would discuss while out at dinner.
I planned to make a salad again or something healthy, as my strict eating habits now told me but I couldn't, to be honest, be bothered to make something like that – I frightened myself a little as I instead I just opened the freezer, and took out a weight watchers USA ready meal – they tasted like crap but they were quick. I didn't want to fall into old habits.
I ate, done my homework, and unpacked my treadmill which until now had been sitting in the hall cupboard, I had still been exercising every night but not the way, in my eyes, I should be. The parts were confusing and several pretty heavy – I had practised setting it up in Phoenix, checking that I could do it by myself and wouldn't have to rely on anyone to help me. I had been slightly obsessive over it, I guess it was paying off now that I didn't have to use any instructions; it was done in minimal time.
It took me about twenty minutes to reassemble it inside my bedroom. I stood up and looked at it when I was done; I took serious pride in this object, it had lost me like several pounds in weight over the years, it was my best friend. I guess having an inanimate object for your best friend is a little weird, but it's the truth when it comes to me – I didn't have a normal childhood – and what's happened is the ripple effect...
I was different, therefore I was bullied. I had one friend; therefore not many people paid attention to my life, my parents. When I moved away I didn't trust people, therefore the sturdy weight losing machine became my closest friend. When I moved back, because I had cut all links with Forks when I left, I could become a different person with a different name and I now had a different face and body, [because my best friend was a treadmill].
This is why I don't show people who I really am, even if they never knew I'm Isabella, they'd still find time weird; It's hard total fear of who you are, of the world in general finding out.
My first steps on the treadmill were like heaven, I felt like I was back, I had something to rely on, a constant. I sped it up till it was at around 14kph, my feet pounded against the floor of the treadmill as I started up my iPod music, blaring rock tunes into my head, anger seeping out of me which I had not even known was there at that point in time, I sped it up again to 15, now I was panting and I as happy, pushing myself, but when I started to get lightheaded I knew I had to slow it down to fast walk. I halved the speed and thought back to my plans for Mike Newton, then it just hit me, I knew exactly how to mess with his love life forever, he had taken away all of my confidence now I would at least attempt to take away some of his. I almost laughed out loud at the ridiculousness of it all but I was still going to do it, he deserved it and it would be hilarious to watch.
I turned off the treadmill with some reluctance after about 50 minutes, sweat pouring from me; I would have to take a shower before bed, and did some of the usual routines: press ups, squats, sit-ups, crunches and some stretches. Then I turned the computer, my lips sliding into a grin, clicking on to Google and changing the search settings to non-filtering- then I stretched out hands in front of my face, my dad shouldn't have been home for hours yet but I still felt the unfamiliar buzz of excitement, the thrill of typing these words into Google – I felt bad, naughty even; and they weren't even for me.
'Male on male action + gay porn' I typed in, hovering the little arrow over the search button – I couldn't bring myself to click, it was just so wrong to do it – I guess loads of people would do stuff like this but I wasn't even doing it for myself and what if my dad was somehow able to trace this – it would be embarrassing enough but to try to explain that the images weren't even mine – now that would set him off big style – all about teenage influences nowadays. I willed myself to click but at the same time my finger was itching to delete the letters quickly, act as if it had never happened. Then I thought of his smug face as he mocked me about the poem I so naively wrote.
I clicked.
Images.
There was the jackpot. Everything I needed.
I turned the, large, noisy printer on, hoping my father would not pick this time to come back from work, but as of yet, there was no sound, I could feel blood pumping around my body, I could feel the adrenaline and it felt good. This revenge was like an antidote to the depressive nature the bullying had caused in me.
Once I had finished I took the time to write over each and every single gay still 'PROPERTY OF MIKE NEWTON xxx' I stood back at from the images, laughing at them; my hair bouncing, my chest heaving, my mouth becoming soar from smiling so much, and I couldn't help it – it was the most I had smiled in years, I was sure. I picked up the spread out images counting them, there were 25 all together, all as explicit as each other, I was thriving in this; enjoying it with every single ounce of me. Don't get me wrong I was petrified of getting caught, but all the same, I would take the risk. This boy deserved it, he had added to the hell my life had once been and now he would pay.
I got a thick blue elastic band and pulled it tightly around the precious sheets of paper, putting it inside my pukka folder and putting that inside my bag for tomorrow. I glanced around me, looking for my phone, I needed to speak to someone while I was in such a good mood –obviously I couldn't share with them the reason why I would be in such a good mood but it would be good to have a nice conversation. The sleek silver object was to be found under my jacket and scarf, I lifted it out and searched for Jacob in my contact list. When I eventually managed to find him I called, my long nails taping were arithmetically on the wooden chest of drawers beside me, and I had become very impatient.
"Hello?" a deep voice vibrated out of the phone, he had only said one word yet it seemed comforting to me, a safe haven.
"Oh hey Jacob, sorry to bother you-"
"You're not bothering me Bella," he interrupted me; I knew he had a grin on his face; he spoke with his face, if that made sense.
"Uh, well I was just wondering how you were, and about plans for the weekend," I bit my lip, not knowing quite what to say to him, my buzz was dying, not because of Jacob, but because the images and the plan was in my bag for tomorrow, there was not action right now to be taken. I was supremely impatient to get on with it all, to see his face, to see everyone's face.
"I'm good thanks, although school was a total bummer, my maths teacher gave me a week's detention for what she calls, "inappropriate conversations" but I sware to God we had just came out of sex ed and Embry and I were discussing what had been in sex ed - my dads raging as well." He paused as I tried not to laugh, I didn't know whether he wanted me to laugh or to sympathised, so I tried both.
"Aww, that's too bad – but I guess you really shouldn't have been discussing it while the teacher was in the room, idiot," I giggled quietly and he joined in, it was nice to have someone that talks to you in a non-serious way - not that Alice was actually serious, but she did talk a little bit too much about fashion sometimes, and it's nice to have a friend like Jake, he was keeper – I laughed inwardly at that last part.
"I guess you're kinda right," he continued, "about the weekend, it's usually an overnight thing, like on the Saturday we have big bonfire and alot of the residents from Lapush attend; it goes on until the early hours of the morning but you could leave earlier if you needed to, otherwise, you could stay at Leah's with her best friend Clair and her cousin Emily, there'll be enough space – it's up to you really,"
I thought about it for a few seconds, maybe it would be beneficial for me to have a little slumber party, even though it wasn't exactly that, "I would love to, stay over I mean, but I thought you said it was just a few mates and that," I had a vague memory of the text message saying it was only them and a few friends.
"Well, I was initially inviting you out Saturday daytime cause I forgot about the bonfire, but Leah reminded me, and offered to let you stay."
"I don't want to intrude..." I told him, applying some lip balm; my lips were beginning to get pretty chapped in this particular climate.
"No, no. If that's all good then are you able to come by the house Saturday evening, about 5 o'clock and we'll get dinner at my place – oh and wait, will Charlie be okay with this?"
I thought about it for a second, "he should be fine and 5 o'clock's good,"
"Well then, I'll see you there. I'm gonna go – I need to go pick Leah up from art classes, she takes them after school – she's amazing actually – you should see her stuff" he sounded so proud of her and for a moment I felt slightly jealous, he must be an amazing boyfriend.
"Hopefully I'll see them at the weekend then, I'll speak to you later Jake," As I hung up the phone I head him say goodbye and it made me feel warm inside, Jacob got the most of the real me, I didn't need to be fashion obsessed near him, and yes I couldn't talk about the whole fragile Isabella which lives inside me or the revengeful one but I could keep my personality that had been God given, I could be that little bit eccentric now and again, make jokes about things I actually enjoy and not talk about my school life because Jacob wasn't particularly interested in his own school life anyway.
I set my alarm for 5:40am, that would give me time to shower, get dressed, do my makeup and hair then get into school early enough that no one would be around while I framed Mike Newton; it was beginning to sound a bit like a crime in my head, probably just my dad's influence and my do good nature which was being flung to the side in this operation.
I made Charlie some dinner, went in for a quick shower so my sheet wouldn't bear the brunt of my exercising routine then went to bed. I was too exhausted to do much else.
When I got out of bed in the morning, I realised that there hadn't been any bad dreams, I would blame that on the talk with Jacob the night before, somehow he had reassured me that it was their [their being the bullies] fault and not mine, a question which had resurfaced a lot in my mind lately.
I had a spring in my step as I walked to the shower; I was ready in record time, something about me was just pushing me to get to school earlier and earlier – my body wanted the excitement, the happiness to be experienced once again. I wore an outfit which accentuated my curves but stayed quite casual, dark navy blue skinny jeans, an oversized cream and small grey striped jersey, finishing it off with a large grey belt for my waist. The slight curls ran down exactly to where my feather and stone necklace hung. I liked it, it was comfy at least, much more my style and it enabled me to wearing grey flats, and all be it very expensive grey flats.
I left Charlie a note telling him I had left early so I could get breakfast with a couple of friends that had called asking me; he probably wouldn't even remember I had left the note by tonight.
When I wrote about how I was getting me breakfast it actually made me sort of hungry, so I stopped by the cafe near the school, jumping in quickly to pick up a sandwich; I felt like a bank robber, stopping in at the next store, the feeling was completely unknown to me, totally new. The cafe was empty, so I ordered and waited, all the time the tension building inside, I wanted those images to be on the front of newspapers, I wanted to hurt the boy more and more, and the weirdest was, I was scaring myself, my dark feelings had never been put into action before. In my head I and always been checking for consequences, letting people down, but today it was just about me and him, and how I would feel, and how he would feel, and since I didn't care about the embarrassment he would suffer, I would go ahead with everything.
I ate inside my truck as I had left with plenty of time so I could afford to lose the 10 minutes. Chewing, I turned up the radio "hello there all those early wakers! Kieran Cosgrove here, brightening your day with my super ooper tunes!" I smiled at his cheery voice, it reminded me somewhat of Edward's voice, it should have made me frown but it only reminded me of the first time I ever spoke to Edward, I was actually in preschool care, I was only 4 – the memories a bit blurred except from the first 10 minutes, I always wonder why I remember it, it doesn't mean anything and I guess that's why I usually forget about it, he was, nice. I always tell myself he was horrible to me from the off, it makes it a little easier to just assume that he's completely evil. He was probably only nice then because at that age I was still at a normal weight, it all went downhill from there.
Memory [13 years ago]
I looked up at my beautiful mother, her hair was half way down her back, I reached up for it, attempting to tug at it but my hand only came up to her bottom. Instead of pulling her hair I settled for jagging one of my small fingers into her thigh, marvelling at the soft velvet like material, it was purple and bright, and I wanted it.
"Isabella?" she looked down at me questioningly, "are you okay," she squatted down, pushing a strand of my hair behind my ear, fixing my soft black Minnie mouse hair band.
"I think so," I answered, my bottom lip sticking out, starting to tremble, I didn't want to be away from my mom with all these people I didn't know, I could hear the ones already inside squealing and talking and crying and altogether making a racket, I wasn't best pleased at all.
"Oh hunnie," she scooped me up in her arms, and stood up with me, "it's okay, all the nice people will look after you, she pointed to the woman coming up to me "there's Judy, she's gonna take you inside and help you have fun," she smiled widely at me, and I nodded.
"Okay, but you have to come and get me soon, I don't want to stay here tonight," I held out my little pinkie for her to pinkie promise with.
She laughed at the concept, "Hunnie, I promise I'll be here to pick you up okay, now go with Judy," she put on the floor, giving me a cuddle and a kiss on the cheek, "I love you Isabella,"
"Love you too mommy," Judy held out her to me, I looked back at my mom and she nodded, so I took it.
"Hello there Isabella, I'm Judy and today we're gonna have lots of fun!"she spoke in an excited to which instantly made me excited, she went on to talk to me about all the games that we were to play in preschool, but I wasn't really listening, we had just went into the big room, where I had heard all the kids shouting from and it was the most amazing, colourful place I had ever seen. I remembered my grandma telling me about heaven, maybe this was it.
"Wow," my tiny red rosebud lips opened into an 'O' shape as I spoke.
"Boys and Girls!" Judy quieted all the children except two girls in the corner, one very pretty girl with long light blonde hair and the other with strawberry blonde, they were playing with the Barbies and the ken dolls. "Rosalie, Tanya, I'm speaking, we remember what to do when Judy's speaking, don't we girls," the both nodded. Judy continued, "I would like you all to say hello to Isabella,"
"Hello!" they chanted.
I lifted my hand to them, "Hello," I felt my face burn bright red and I let go of Judy's hand.
"Where is it you would like to go play," Judy asked as the children started talking and playing again.
"Can I go in the sand pit?" I asked, there was a little boy in the sand pit already, I hadn't seen him when everyone had said hello, he was sitting with his back to me, playing with all sorts of objects. I was curious.
"Well okay Isabella, but you have to remember to brush yourself down on the mat when you're finished in there" she pointed to a sand coated green mat, "and make sure you don't put any sand in your mouth, we had a little incident with that last week and we don't want anything like that happening again," I'd already really stopped listening by the time she'd stopped talking, and was jumping in.
The boy with the bronze hair turned around, his little angelic face was so shockingly perfect, I had never seen a more beautiful boy, "Wow," I said to him.
"What?" he asked, brushing down his red shirt.
"You're really pretty," I told him, reaching out to touch his cheek, seeing if he was real or just a large pretty doll. But no, my finger squished into his sandy cheek.
He frowned at me, "I'm not a girl, I'm not pretty, I'm handsome – you're pretty, you're a girl," I smiled slightly, my cheeks growing hot again.
"Thankyou," I told him, "and you're right, you are handsome," I sunk my hands deep into the sand. "Do you like it here; don't you miss your mommy?" I asked him as I tried not cry.
He shimmied closer to me, "I don't miss her when my brother's here, but he's sick today so I do miss my mommy," he put his hand out and took mine, "Do you want me to read your future," he told me, "my cousin showed me how to," I nodded, feeling comforted by the boy.
"What's your name," I asked as I showed him the palm of my hand.
"Edward,"
"Edward," I repeated, "I like your name,"
"I like yours too," he told me. He pointed to the big long vertical line leading from just underneath my fore finger to my thumb, "this line means that you're beautiful," he told me.
I gasped, "Really?"
"Uhuh," he continued, he pointed to the line that started in-between my fore finger and middle finger that lasted to underneath my pinkie, "and this line means you will have lots of friends,"
"That's so cool," I told him.
He pointed to the line in-between both of the ones he had just before pointed out, "and this line means people love you," I nodded solemnly.
"Thankyou Edward."
"It was no problem Isabella," at that moment I went to go get a snack from the teachers, Edward didn't come with me and I made a new friend, Angela –I never played with Edward again and the next day his brother was in, he was different then. He didn't act the same to me and we never spoke of the sandbox incident again.
[End Memory]
I started up the truck engine, it was time to go commit the deed, and my hands gripped the wheel tighter as I turned into the secluded parking lot. Not one car was there, not one person, it was 1 whole hour before school started.
I prayed for the doors to be open and they were, maybe even God thought I was allowed some sort of revenge. I walked quickly to where my locker, flats were soundless against the floor and I didn't meet anyone on the way there. I took out the images as I reached the locker, I looked at the first one, the naked guys holding each other and I struggled not to laugh as the little Isabella inside me burned with happiness. Finally. It was then I realised how heavy my breathing had become, my throat seemed slightly constricted.
I stuffed them all into his locker, then the next, and then next, up until they had all gone inside, ready to fall out.
I walked away from it slowly, my body felt a little numb, my legs wobbled, I don't know how, in fact, I do know how, because I'm still scared to this day that doing do something like this would get me battered. I wanted to hit myself for being so stupid.
I ran to the toilets when I had regained my legs fully, shoving my iPod headphones into my ear and blaring some Second-hand Serenade in my ears, I would go back in half an hour and wait for him to come, then I had something else planned too.
In the break between songs I heard someone coming, diving into the open door 'out of order' cubicle I got my foot caught on the side of the cubicle door, I went flying towards the toilet seat and only managed to stop myself by sticking out my hands onto the toilet pan seat. Yuck. I wasn't even sure why I was hiding, but instincts told me to do it. I locked the door as I heard the person come into the toilet room. I quietly put down the toilet seat lid and then lowered myself onto it, lifting my feet off the ground and hoping they wouldn't see me.
It was silent for couple of seconds before I heard crying. Soft sobs. They sounded muffled as if they were being cried into a handkerchief and from my judgement the girl must have been standing at the mirrors.
I paused my iPod in case she was able to hear it through the speakers and put it into my pocket. I didn't know why I felt so daring but I did, so I stood up on the toilet seat, hoping that I was quiet enough, and then peeked over the top of the cubicle. There, in an outfit practically identical to mine [skinny jeans, long top and flats] was Rosalie Hale, if the sweeping blonde hair wasn't enough of a giveaway, I could see her face in the mirror, she was holding a scarf to her face, practically crying into it. I dropped back down; scared in case she would spot me.
Just as quick as she had come she was gone, I waited a couple of minutes before unlocking the door, I stepped cautiously out into the corridor, my heart in my mouth, but there was no one to be seen. I pondered for a moment what I had seen, why had she been crying, maybe she was really ill, and I had just let her stand there by herself. Those sort of thoughts made me feel small, like I should have just got over my past, but what people don't understand is that things are easier said than done, especially things like this. I made my way back towards the locker and waited just at the corner before, watching. I set up my phone, so that when I pressed one button the phone would play "love drunk" at full volume.
When my mind alone made the decision to wonder back to memories of Mike when he was younger I had to do something. Because thinking about it was only fucking me over, killing the life in me, I kept seeing their faces, laughing at me, screaming at me; I saw their hands and feet, kicking at me and punching at me and I didn't know what to do because I was gonna blackout, I was sinking slowly to the floor, leaning against the cold cream wall just to keep myself upright, I could feel myself twitching slightly and I made the decision to do something I hadn't done in a while but I knew it would snap me out of it, I leaned forward, then sharply swung my head backwards, into the wall, breathing in deeply as I did so. I made sure it wasn't too hard, and thankfully, now my only thoughts were on the pain in the back of my skull. My hand shook as I clutched the back of my head. Maybe this whole revenge thing wasn't the best thing; maybe coming back Forks wasn't a good idea.
But now I only thought of the throbbing ache in the back of my head, I was slightly dizzy but not enough to worry about it. The corridors were filling up and as I stood there, hands now by my side, I found that it was painful just to smile at everyone, just when I thought I couldn't last much longer I saw him, he was coming from the other side of the corridor, and I walked towards him. My head spun as I walked forward but I ignored it, this is what I had been waiting for. He smiled at me when he saw me coming towards him.
"Oh Bella, hey, how are you?" I smiled at him too; attempting not let it fall into a smirk.
"I'm good thanks, how are you, I love your hair by the way," actually, his hair was pretty boring, the short spiked look had been out of style for a year or so now.
His hand went to his locker and my finger went to the button on my phone, he started to turn the lock and I ignored what he was saying to focus on what was about to happen, I smiled evilly as I pressed the button and everyone in relatively close proximity turned to stare...his locker opened and the sheets fell out.
I gasped in mock horror. I heard the other loud noises of disgust, and I leaned down, taking a closer look at the familiar images, "Oh my god!" I shouted, the pain in my head was gone for the moment, all I could feel was a high, maybe someone had spiked my sandwich cause I was ecstatic, "IT'S FUCKING GAY PORN!" There was chaos in the hall and I caught only a glimpse of Mike Newton's bright red face, embarrassed to an extent I could truly understand then I turned from the whole situation, walked quickly to the toilets which were conveniently empty and burst into laughter, I was doubled over with it, my sides hurt from it, my cheeks ached from it and I was so proud.
It was like I had represented all the bully victims in the world and really done them proud, I was glad I had done it, and even if I was to get caught, just to see that look on his face it was worth it.
I was still in my incredibly buzzing sense of mind when I walked straight into the other person who I was positive would soon be under fire from me. My whole front burned with the touch of him, it was as if I had some sort of touch sensitive allergic reaction to the beast.
"Arghh," I exclaimed, dramatising it slightly, I pushed him away from me with the tips of my fingers, touching with the least amount of me I possibly could.
"Oh here we go, miss fucking high and mighty," I growled at him as my heart jumped into my mouth, the asshole thought he had some sort of reason to talk to me like I was shit on his motherfucking shoe. Well he didn't even know the start of anger.
"Don't start dickhead," I spat at him. The Mike Newton thing was flaring me up, I was burning right into him, I felt it, and I knew the energy in my eyes was just burning holes in his.
He smiled, the cocky bastard actually smiled. I was shocked on how many swear words came to mind when I thought of Edward Cullen."Enlighten me Bella, why am I a dickhead,"
I was so proud of myself, I thought of a comeback straight away and threw it at him, "we don't have forever,"
"Oh for god sake," he moaned, clapping his hand to his forehead, I felt myself flinch as his hand moved like that, it only angered me more that I had to actually live in fear of a 17 year old boy because of traumatising things he done to me years ago, it was humiliating, "you've known me for all of 3 days and already I'm a dickhead to you? What have I actually done to you?"
I thought about it, what could I use as my excuse for my supreme hatred of him, "it's not what you do to me, it's the way you treat people," he took a step towards me, frowning.
I took a step back, wincing as much as I tried not to, his facial expression changed, he looked sort of apologetic, I dragged in a breath and flicked my hair back, I prayed he hadn't realised anything, "I'm not trying to intimidate you, you know that right," I nodded, narrowing my eyes at him, I guess I might have looked a little scared, I couldn't help it if I was.
"I know," After I spoke I realised that the way I had just spoke would never convince anyone I wasn't afraid of them.
"Listen Bella, I know that you think I'm an ass and stuff and to be honest I don't know why, but will you just give me a chance?" I pretended to be in thought, but my answer had been ready for years now.
"In your fucking dreams, sweet pea."
School went by like a dream, Mike Newton was all anyone was talking about, and it was my fault, I couldn't be any more proud.
I saw him at lunch, I was kind of shocked that he was still in school after the reveal of his "property" this morning, he was sat with a bunch of his friends who were trying to keep him covered and stop people from noticing him, I was near hysterics when Rosalie walked over with Emmett, his hand was around her waist and as she came towards me she repeatedly moved his arm further up her waist, away from her bum which he kept dropping it very close to. He looked shocked at her actions and eventually, gave her a look that obviously said, "What the fuck?" I watched them as Rose silenced him with another look, then they both continued towards me.
"S'up Bella!" Emmett shouted, holding out a hand for me to high five; I did, regretting it when my hand stung due to the contact with such a huge hard palm.
"Ouch," I mumbled and he let go of Rose, hugging me and swinging me around.
"Rosalie, how amazing is Bella?"what had gotten into him, "I just went along early to check if I passed my history pop quiz and the teacher said I passed with a B, a B Rose, I've not passed history with a B ever!" trust him to be hugging me about something like this, of course it wouldn't just be because he liked me, It would be because he liked his grades.
Rosalie nodded, with a smile that didn't quite reach her hands, I took a step back from Emmett in case it was of the fuss he was making over me, "Oh by the way Bella, thanks for helping me out the other day, I don't know what it was, I'm guessing though it was just a bug," she edged towards me; I wasn't sure what she was doing.
She hugged me. I laughed at the irony, I couldn't believe it and I wanted to just be a friend to her, because she seemed like a person I would get on with; but I knew better, and I stopped my good side and remembered while I hugged her that there was a possibility of me getting revenge on her – I hadn't been too sure about doing it to either her or Emmett, they both probably had hard childhoods, Rosalie's brother having cancer and Emmett being adopted; they still shouldn't have done what they did to me though, they were the wrong ones.
We stepped back from each other when we were finished and I balled my fists up, taking a deep breath, I could feel it, I knew he was here; it was as if when he entered a room I just knew, because I could sense him, sense the pain, have flashes of my living hell.
He stepped right over to us, running his fingers through his intriguing bronze hair he spat at me, "bitch," yet again, if this was someone I didn't have a history with, I would be deserving of that title, but as it wasn't, I didn't.
"Excuse me?"
"What the fuck man?"
"Edward,"
Emmett seemed pretty pissed from the off, the muscles in his arms tensed, I watched in wonder as he pushed Edward on the shoulder, "dude. That's not cool," he hissed. I was realising I could use these acts of Emmett to my advantage, his protectiveness of Bella Swan could so easily be twisted into my overall plan, the plan was by no means finished, it was being constructed further each day; Edward at least would get exactly what he deserved. Hateful piece of shit that he is.
I checked Rose's expression; her mouth was hanging open and one of her eyebrows were slightly higher than the other, as if signalling to Edward, I chose to copy her shocked perception of Edward's rudeness - we would see if I could play this little miss innocent act on them; fool them as they had fooled me so many times before.
MEMORY – [11 years ago]
I bounced slightly on my mother's knee as she brushed steadily through my thick long hair, making an attempt to detangle the curls which lay at the bottom.
"Mommy?" I asked, twiddling my thumbs with boredom, "What will happen if I forget my lines?" I locked my fingers together but my thumbs managed to keep twirling, I could feel butterflies in my stomach and I knew it was silly because I only had one line, it wasn't a big deal.
"You won't sweetheart, you'll do it all perfectly, trust me," she skimmed her forefinger across cheek, "you'll look lovely in your costume too,"
I took a breath and nodded, which pulled the brush tighter, to be honest I was still shocked that she had given me the costume, it wasn't like her to be so nice, I had good mind to not accept it but then again I couldn't help myself but be nice back, it was just in my nature.
When my mother had finished and I ran upstairs to grab the rest of my things before we left for the school I lay down on my bad quickly, staring at the ceiling. "God, if you're up there, please protect me today, don't let them do something that'll ruin it all, I just want to be good, I want to show my mom that I can do it, that I'm just a normal kid and I'm happy, please," I breathed in and out before I remembered I was supposed to say amen, "oh, and Amen," I stuttered quickly before jumping off of my bad and running downstairs, skipping up to my mom and holding her hand in mines, pulling her as she switched of the lights, I wanted to be there early to practice, this was one of the few times I had ever looked forward to going to school.
The drive there consisted of several questions of how I felt and repetition of my one line, "I'm a green pea and I provide fibre and protein," I was still not too sure what fibre and protein were but I said the line anyway, I had practised it so many times that my lisp was even a little less prominent on it.
I jumped out of the car and propelled myself towards the school, my mother shouting on me to wait for her. We went our separate ways when we got in, she asked me again if Rosalie was definitely giving me the green pea costume, "and you're positive Izzy?"
"Uhuh," I shivered at the use of my nickname, I hated it, "I've seen it mom I promise you," I guess it was a little unbelievable to me too so I couldn't say too much.
I strode off in the opposite direction to get ready, my mom was on her way to do the tea bar for the parents, as she was on the committee it meant that she done things like this regularly, examples being the school disco, she would chaperone which meant I could mostly enjoy the school events, this was one of the reasons I was looking forward to tonight, being normal and performing in my school play, a little out of character for me, wanting to be in front of crowds that is but I was having such a rush, my heart was thumping erratically and I was ready to step out onto that platform, to make my mother proud, to show everyone that I wasn't good for nothing.
Rosalie Hale was waiting for me when I entered the classroom, kids were getting changed while chatting to their friends so no one noticed or heard her, she smiled angelically at me as she handed me the green pea costume, she hadn't seemed to have done anything, it seemed in good condition just as it had been when she had showed me it two days ago; I had the strong urge to check over it, make sure it was fine to go on stage with but I didn't want to anger her, so I took it with some thankyous then scurried over to where Angela was changing silently.
"Hey Ange," I grinned, she grinned back at me, holding out a small sweetie packet to me; I took one, and popped it in my mouth, sucking on it as I contemplated what lay ahead.
I turned from the class as I changed, embarrassed of my body, I tore of my clothes quickly then slipped as quickly as I could into the pea pod costume, it just fitted me, it was quite tight but it would be okay for the night. The teacher zipped up the back and I sat, reading through my line as everyone chattered, voice entering my head now and again, all of their thought and fears of tonight ruining my calmness, I started to feel slightly dizzy as I would when I was about to have a panic attack, but I pushed back the dizziness, stood up and began pacing around the classroom quickly, to keep my head clear and my body able to cope.
I lifted my wrist to my mouth, the thin gold band which gripped at my wrist slightly, it was already too small for me, but it was my grandmothers present, my grandmother who had just passed away only months ago, so I kissed the bangle instead of taking it off and rubbing at my wrist because lately when I had put it on it had been rubbing sorely at the skin.
I itched my arm a little as we walked behind the stage, then scratched my leg, I was nervous.
I could literally feel the blood pumping around my body, it seemed to pound at my ears, I felt my forehead cover with a layer of sweat, the costume was too hot, I stood onto the stage as I heard everyone clap, I followed the person in front of me as I was supposed to, suppressing the urge to itch at my stomach.
I could see the audience, the parents, but I couldn't depict any particular faces, everything seemed burred, it didn't feel real, like a dream, I was overheating in the costume and all I wanted to do was itch, I subtly scratched at my thigh as the principal introduced us, we were t open with a song, but I could feel my throat closing over, this wasn't normal, why could I not stop myself from itching, it was if I had caught fleas from the costume.
And then it hit me. I knew why I was panicking and knew why I was so itchy, this was Rosalie Hale and the rest of thems doing, they had made it itchy, I don't know how, maybe they had used poison ivy, maybe even real fleas, I wouldn't put to past them, but all I knew was that tears were welling up in my eyes from frustration and disappointment, they had pulled one over on me again and there was no way I would go on, as it was I was noticing people turning their cold gazes to me, wondering what I was doing, but I couldn't stop, my cheeks heated as tears poured down them as everyone else burst into song, smiling.
I chanced one look at them, the gang of hateful purputraiters, they smiled, even Rosalie's evil grin seemed once again angelic as I looked at Edward's face, all he did was wink but I knew right then that it had been his idea all along, he had been the puppet master, moving the strings so violently and hurtfully over me, kicking me when I was down would be his next thing, I knew that the next day, he would be the first one to sneer, he would act as if he knew nothing of how the costume had became so unbearably itchy, probably tell the rest of the school that I had fleas or something of the sort.
I turned with my head down, defeated and tears of pain flying down my face. I ran from the stage, not looking back once, all I could think of was Edward's face. The boy was evil. Pure, irrevocable, evil.
[MEMORY END]
"I don't believe you are all falling for her act, can't you see that she's just a bitch in disguise," I drew in a fake shocked breath and Rosalie's tongue clicked noisily.
"'Cause she's so much worse than all of your little friends over there," she drew a disgusted look at the cheerleading table, which confused me, wasn't she a cheerleader, the head cheerleader in fact.
"Don't even start with turning the tables, we're talking about Bella here not them, and anyway, you used to spend all your time with them, I don't know how you can talk," He sniped back at her, clearly his temper was still there, I stepped closer to Emmett, my arm was now brushing against his and he glanced at me quickly, giving me a reassuring look, before answering Edward himself.
"Do you really want to start arguing with Rosalie because you know that means you're arguing with me and what the fuck is your problem with Bella-"
"Why the fuck do you like her?"
"Because she's sound, man, if you gave her a chance you would know that," I smiled inside at the argument I was causing between the two one cocky brothers, Emmett seemed like a totally different guy, Edward, not so much.
"Ughhh," he growled, "I fucking did... repeatedly" I could see he was struggling not to throw a proper temper tantrum in the school cafeteria and I decided to step in, see if I could push him over the edge.
"I guess I might have been a little short with you, but only because you act so arrogant, and I don't want to be associated with people who are totally up themselves and think they're better than me," I spoke in a soft voice, quiet and calm compared to the tone Edward had previously used.
"I have not acted arrogantly," he snarled back at me, yet again I was saved by his own turning brother.
"Sounds alot like you Edward,"
"Shut up," he answered and Emmett's face tightened.
"Don't start Edward, I'm warning you, I'm sick of the way you treat people, I know that you're lying to me and until you're ready to apologize to Bella don't bother apologizing to me."
He turned away and pulled an arm around my waist, taking me and Rosalie with him, I couldn't resist a short glance back just to see his face - see what the mighty Edward thought of his brother's actions towards me and he just looked desolate. He looked hurt. For the fraction of a second I felt guilt, but all I needed was a little jog of the memory and again I felt pleasure in my victory.
He was getting what he deserved, they were treating him like the bully he really was, it seemed like I had came in on the clique just as it was at boiling point. Finally my luck seemed to be pointing tin the right direction, and his seemed to be turning on him.
Emmett interrupted my thoughts with his informative words, "take no notice of him Bella, Edwards my brother and all, but he can be a real dick sometimes, he thinks he can treat people like shit because some people treat him like a God," he nodded towards the cheerleading table disgustedly. As much as I angry at him right now, I know he's changing Bella, he is, maybe soon you'll be able to give him another chance,"
I nodded without thought to the matter; I had been forced to change because of Edward Cullen's behaviour, and when I really think about it, I don't think the rest of that gang would have done what they did to me if they didn't have him as a leader. Maybe Rosalie but the rest of them didn't seem like the sort to start that sort of vendetta on someone, they followed him, they had seemed to worship him, and now it was all turning. My return to Forks was going to break him, I was sure of it now, the new Bella had confidence.
*A.N. - Hope you enjoyed, and as late birthday present... reviews???:L They are soooo good :D Best review I'll mention next time, kay x*