*A.N. – Well guys, it's been a couple of years or so but I've done another chapter, sorry that I kept you waiting all that long but it's been a crazy couple of years – I moved away for university and I've been living my life, I miss my writing a lot and finally I decided to make the leap and write again – this chapter genuinely took me a couple of hours and I'm surprised at how quickly it just flew out of me. I've missed it and I hope I've not lost my touch. Let me know what you think of this chapter and review for me please. Much appreciated and sorry for the mega delay x*
I finally got a grip of myself and dragged myself out of the reverie I was feeling and wallowing in. I couldn't do this anymore. Crying wasn't going to make me feel better. Nor was it going to make Edward any less in a coma. What had happened had happened and all I could do now was work out how to act. I knew now without a doubt I loved this Edward even though I knew I should and I wanted to loathe him. But there was no more denying it, I love him and whether I like it or not an immense pain was constantly inside me since I had heard of Edward's accident.
He didn't know who I was and he truly cared for me to, I knew he did. Perhaps it would all come out eventually; in fact I was sure that it no doubt would if I got into any sort of long term relationship with him. But I had to risk it all because this pain I felt when I knew he was in pain, and that I might never again get the chance to be with him assured me that it was worth it.
I visited him over the passing weeks and often ran into his family and his friends who had suddenly became my friends. Both of the couples were too immersed in their own suffering over Edward to complain about me withdrawing somewhat from their company. Before I knew it three weeks had passed and I still felt like I was moving like a zombie. Lack of sleep and my self-imposed social exclusion had be constantly turning over the Edward problem in my head. Every time I visited he looked so peaceful and yet every time I visited I knew as the days passed it became less likely he would wake up. Dr Cullen who at first had seemed so sure of his son's full recovery looked thinner and more worried every day. Some days, when I didn't visit I sat in my room and read books and plays and poetry to try and take my head out of the situation. Anything remotely romantic had to be put out of my sight because I refused to be a crying little wretch any longer.
This particular day, when I had sat and stared and thought my lot by Edward's bedside I turned to go and was assailed by a blossoming Rosalie. Now looking at her, she was only just managing to pull of her pregnancy as a quick weight gain as her stomach was quickly rounding, it suddenly hit me that she was nearly five months now and as far as I could tell no one knew yet – it could only have been the families preoccupation with Edward that stopped them from noticing Rosalie's accelerated weight gain – especially around the midsection.
Her eyes sought mine, she grasped my hand and I allowed her to walk me out of the hospital and into her car. I sat across from her my mind still feeling as fuzzy as it had done in the past three weeks when I was suddenly brought back to the reality that life goes on even when the person you love doesn't keep moving with it.
"I need to tell everyone." She looked at me expecting some sort of help but I just stared back at her. "Please Bella, I need your help or advice or at least something from you… I – I'm so scared." A tear trickled down her smooth, beautiful face and I shook myself somewhat.
"I'm sorry Rosalie, I haven't felt quite here lately, you know, since…" I trailed off and Rosalie just nodded as her hand rubbed her belly.
She stared out the window for a little while then snapped her head round to me, I could tell she had felt the same way, her eyes said it all, "You know, you don't understand what it means to me to be able to sit with another person and have my hand on my bump." She smiled sadly at her growing bump. "What a mess this is. With Edward in a coma and his family worried and stressed I couldn't say anything, especially not to Emmett who's been bursting into tears randomly every time I see him." She nibbled on the skin on her thumb and I noticed her chewed nails. "I need to tell him, I need to tell them all – nobody knows and its eating me up in side – not to mention that someone's bound to notice how round my stomach is becoming and it can't all be down to eating." Again I really opened my eyes at the world around me and focused on Rosalie. She couldn't have been eating properly since the accident because the weight she had been gaining on her face and thighs had dropped off of her and worry for her unborn baby penetrated my foggy mind.
"Yes, I agree, it is time to tell them and at the end of the day this happened long before Edward… They won't blame you for it and you need to for your own health," she tried to interrupt me then but I ploughed on, "I can tell you haven't being eating as much as you should – you've been Edward's best friend for a long time and no doubt you're in a lot of pain about it but you need to focus on yourself as well Rose. I've been too stuck in my own self-pitying thoughts for the last few weeks and you speaking to me had woken me up – how do you want to do this?" It was funny how I could speak to Rosalie now and hardly even think of the past – it wasn't forgotten but my heart wouldn't allow me to feel rage or bitterness at the moment, I was too full up of love and sadness for the time being.
"I think I'm going to head over to the Cullen's tonight and speak to them all, I was going to tell Emmett separately but now I think there's no point – I can't bear to see him eaten up with worry of something else but at least if I tell them all at the same time I can take the blame for them not having been told before and Emmett won't have to worry about telling his family I'll have done it for him."
I didn't quite agree with her assessment of things, I personally would have told Emmett, you know it takes two to tangle and all that but each to their own, this wasn't my problem anyway, "are you sure?"
"Yes, I just need you there to hold my hand."
"Rosalie I don't know if that's the best of ideas."
"Please, I need you Bella." I thought of all the times I needed her to stop what she had been doing and help me but I dismissed it from my mind. I was tired of fighting with myself, she was my friend now, this is my life now, and maybe when I feel more myself and the issues weren't as important I would find time to be bitter but not now.
"If you really need me, pick me up tonight before you go and we'll go up together."
"Thank you, it really means a lot." Her brilliant blue eyes pierced mine and a huge rush of empathy flooded through me, the pained look in her eyes was familiar, the worry and fear of what was going to happen was very familiar. Although I knew her reasons were completely different I felt closer to her than I ever had – I reached out and took her hand.
"No matter what happens tonight I will be here for you, okay? Don't be so frightened, they will support you and Emmett has loved you since he met you, he would never let you go."
She squeezed my hand back and tears spilled over and down her face, I let go and left the car going to find my own truck.
Despite the oddity that had just happened I felt a rush of pride in myself and my mind was the clearest it had been since the accident. I had done the right thing and put someone before myself. Thoughts of Edward assailed me and tears welled in my eyes, if he woke up, I would do things differently than before.
As we got out of the car I could see Rosalie shaking and I took her hand, "you'll be okay, you can do this." She nodded and we walked to the door in comfortable silence. We got to the door; "ready?"
"Ready."
I opened the door and we walked in, letting go of each other's hands. Conveniently they were all sat in the living room. It was unlike them not be all chatting and comfortable in each other's company but it looked like they had all just returned from seeing Edward and they all had that haunted look in their eyes I had seen so frequently in the past few weeks. Emmett was so focused on the television he never even noticed us coming in where Carlisle and Esme looked up from their books and Alice and Jasper waved a hello from their chess games.
"Any change?" Rosalie asked as we stood awkwardly at the door of the living room.
Esme bit her lip and shook her head leaning further into her husband. Emmett jumped round nodded at Rosalie and turned back round again. I could see the pain in her eyes at his quick dismissal of her.
I reached out my hand again and touched hers – I nodded my head at her when she looked at me and she took a deep, calming breath.
"Guys, I have something to tell you all," everyone turned to look and Emmett looked at her in wide eyed surprise, "please turn the television of Em." He nodded and the room was suddenly eerily quiet. I stood there awkwardly as she took deep breaths and tried to bring up the courage; once more I took her hand and squeezed it. She squeezed back and started to speak.
"I should have told you this a while ago but I was confused and scared and after Edward – well I didn't want to cause any more stress, but it has got to a point now that I can't hold it in anymore." She stifled a little sob. "I'm pregnant."
All of them jumped up from their seats in shock and started to walk towards her looks of worry in their eyes. I noticed Emmett was missing from the faces and heard the slam of the living room door and he walked out the other side of the room.
Rosalie made to go after him but Esme grasped her forearm, "leave him to come round to it – you've told us all now – how far along are you? 8 weeks? 10?"
Rosalie looked sheepish and worried but she answered, "20."
"WHAT?" They were all shocked but they all cuddled her and Carlisle leaned in close to Rosalie so close I'm sure I wasn't meant to hear what he said.
"After what's happened to Edward, it's taught me that the most important thing is that all my family are healthy – including you Rosalie." She nodded her head and cuddled into him,
"Thank you Carlisle that means a lot me." Her bottom lip trembled and he knocked her under the chin with his thumb and rumpled her hair.
"You know you're family here no matter what Rosie."
Alice by then couldn't contain herself and she put her arm out straight to Rosalie's stomach and her eyes bulged as she felt the considerable bump underneath the thick oversized jumped and Rosalie pulled the jumper up and showed them her sizable bump. Even I was shocked – she'd hidden the size of it pretty well.
"How have you hidden this from Emmett for so long?" Alice questioned.
"It wouldn't have had it not been for what happened – I was planning to tell him a few weeks ago – then, stuff got complicated…" she trailed off and Alice nodded.
Jasper drew a deep, loud breath and put his arm around his sister's shoulders, "Have you told mom yet?"
She shook her head, "You know we don't get on so well."
"Yes but she loves you and you need to tell her."
"I do."
A smash could be heard loudly in the silence, it was coming from upstairs and Jasper bristled, "If he thinks he can-" Rosalie put a hand out to silence him.
"I'm going up to speak to him" Jasper put his arm around Rosalie but she slowly pried his arm away.
"This is my problem to make right, we both done this and I'm going to make it right – I should have told him and no wonder he is angry – his brothers ill and he's now being told his seventeen year old girlfriend is pregnant – I don't blame him."
The family nodded and all cuddled her one at a time before she made her way up stairs. She turned to me at the other door and mouthed a thank you. She was cradling her bump between both her hands proudly.
Rosalie's Point of View
I could finally hold my bump in my hands in front of people and it felt amazing – it was like a symbol of my freedom to tell the world that I was a pregnant teenager and I had gotten over it so they could to. I can't even describe the joy it brought me – I hadn't planned this pregnancy but it didn't mean I wasn't maternal.
I just had to speak to Emmett, to make him understand. It hurt but I would let him go do his own thing without me if he wanted – I love him more than anything – except perhaps the new life kicking away inside me right now.
I forced myself to walk up those stairs and knocked, for the first time in a long time, at the door.
"I don't want to talk to anyone right now. Go. Away." Emmett sounded furious, I noticed I was biting my nails again and took them away from my mouth. I felt the pain of his quick rejection but I needed to explain to him.
"Baby, it's me."
I opened the door slowly and saw him sitting on the ottoman under the window sill staring out. He wouldn't even look at me. I felt my eyes burn with fresh tears and my throat choke up as I tried to speak. I took a deep breath and sat down on the bed across from him. My baby was kicking me right under the ribs and I shifted uncomfortably, putting a hand to my stomach just as he turned round a grim look on his face. His head snapped back round to the window and my hand dropped from my tummy.
"Baby-"
"Don't speak to me. Just get out before I lose my temper." He spoke to me in a tone I don't think he'd ever spoken to me in before.
I looked over to the smashed painting I had done for him on the floor, glass everywhere. I had expected a bad reaction but not this. I thought about leaving him to cool off but I deserved to at least explain myself.
"Emmett, you could at least let me explain, I would have-"
"You would have what?" He asked, his voice dripping in scorn.
"Don't be like this, please, let me say what I have to say then you can decide whether to hate me or not."
He turned from the window this time again, I could see that his jaw was clenched, as were his fists and he opened his mouth, his lips trembled a little then he asked, "Whose is it?"
"Whose is what?" I asked, not understanding at first what he meant.
"WHO'S CHILD ARE YOU CARRYING?" He barked then put his head in his hands and started to sob.
I sat there in pure shock for a few seconds not quite able to register what the question meant then I realised what he had thought. He hadn't been there to hear that I was twenty weeks pregnant and he had added up my recent celibacy and worked out that I must be pregnant by someone else. The relief that flooded over me was so wonderful that I nearly laughed.
I stood up slowly and walked over and put my hand on his hair. I could see and feel him tense up and I quickly told him; "It's your baby and I'm twenty weeks pregnant – I've been hiding this for a long time."
He looked up at me, his expression one of shock and I nodded at him. Tears flowed freely down his cheeks then – my man who never cried had cried more than he ever had in his entire life in these past few weeks I just pulled his head to my tummy and played with his hair with my hands as he sobbed and apologised, I just held him.
He finally sniffed and looked up at me; "I feel like I've lost Edward, and I thought I'd lost you too there – I couldn't cope…" he trailed off.
"Its okay honey, I understand, I should never have kept it a secret I just didn't want to hold you back and when I went to tell you – the accident happened."
"I don't care Rosalie," his beautiful eyes stared straight into mine, "I love you and so what this is earlier than we would have planned but I was always going to marry you and have a family with you and we both know it."
It was my turn to cry now as he led me over to the bed and we sat down cuddling each other. He lifted my jumper slowly and I just took it off over my head.
"I can't believe I didn't notice this before." He said, his hand touching my quite prominent and round bump for the first time. My heart felt like it was melting.
"I've been quite sneaky with hiding it and to be honest it wasn't really so big up until the last couple of weeks and it seems to have gone massive."
He wasn't really listening, he could feel the small kicks with his hand and he was staring in wonderment at my tummy, his lashes wet with tears. He bent down then and kissed right above my belly button then kissed me fully on the lips.
"I love you Rosalie Hale – never scare me like that again," he managed a shaky laugh then put his arms around my waist.
"Oh Emmett," I put my face on his shoulder and just let myself be held. My heart almost breaking out my chest with love for my beautiful, soft hearted, oaf.
*A.N. – Review please, pretty cute chapter if I do say so myself – next chapter – back to a focus on Bella…*