This is it. I'm gonna tell Maya I'm in love with her. Even though that talk with Farkle gave me the push I needed, I'm a little scared. There's so many "what if's" running through my head right now I'm starting to think I shouldn't do this, but I have to tell her. She needs to know how I feel.

"Hey, Maya" I say nervously.

"Hey, Riles. Why does your voice sound like that? Is something wrong?" Dang it. Of course, she can hear the fear in my voice.

"Uh. Nothing. I just need to talk to you about something. Can you come over please?"

"Yeah. Sure. Be over in a second"

I'm already regretting this decision and I haven't even told her, yet. My hearts beating fast, I'm getting shaky, and now I'm getting sweaty, gross. I can't do anything about it now. Maya's climbing through my window sitting in the bay window facing me.

"Hey, what's up?" She says giving me this encouraging smile reassuring me that whatever I tell her she's there for me no matter what.

"Okay. I have to tell you something and I understand if you never wanna see me again."

"Wait. Riles, what could you possibly tell me that would make me never want to see you?"

I turn away from her not wanting to look at her face when I tell her this. "Maya, I love you very much. And I started to realize that my love for you isn't just friendly, but also romantic."

"What are you saying?"

"I love you, Maya"

"I love you too"

"No. Maya….I'm in love with you"

"Oh…" Maya turns away staring straight ahead.

"Yeah…."

"You know, I figured this would happen when you told me you're bi"

"Seriously!?" For some reason, that made me very mad.

"Yeah. It happens."

Now I'm definitely regretting telling her. Like that's all she says!? "I figured." "It happens."

I don't even care anymore. I just want to be alone now.

"You know what? Can you just forget I said anything"

"Wait, Riles I-"

"Please leave. I wanna be alone."

"Um. Okay."

As Maya leaves, I make my way over to my bed, turn on Lay Me Down - by Sam Smith, and cry. Little did I know, Maya was standing outside my window watching me feeling very confused and guilty.

I can't believe Maya said she figured this would happen when I told her I was bi. I remember how I told her. It was kinda funny actually.

[Flashback]

I've been wanting to come out to Maya for a while now. She's my best friend and I don't like keeping secrets from her. Today's the day I'm finally going to tell her, April Fool's Day. I've been trying to find ways to come out and I thought to myself, April Fool's Day is in a few days. If something goes wrong and she doesn't accept it, I can just say April Fools and everything will be fine. Right?

I grab my phone. I decided to text her; it just seems easier. Well, here goes nothing.

'Surprise! I'm bi'

'Wait...what'

'Lol April Fools!'

'Really Riles? You can't joke about sexualities and coming out people struggle with that.'

'It's okay. I'm not joking. I'm actually bi.'

'Oh. Okay?'

'Riles were you scared to tell me?'

'A little (read: very much so). It's just that some people don't accept bisexuality they think we're being greedy or just don't exist. Some people hate me automatically.

'Well, I'm not some people. Who you love won't change how much I love you, okay?'

'Okay.'

Thinking back on that now made me laugh a little even though I'm still crying my eyes out. I might have overreacted. Maybe I should retry my talk with Maya.