Chapter 11: Kokoro's Sick Day
"I-I-I…I'll never disappear again!"
Kokoro's eyes snapped open, but she found herself welcomed only by a chilling darkness. Her body was hunched back, twisted as much as her spine could handle, but she just looked around without a thought. A large eye with a purple fleshy encasing swung around the darkness and let out a heavy "woosh!" with Kokoro jerking her head back only to just stare into the darkness again, though with a strange feeling suddenly latching onto her stomach.
She looked to the left and saw something with hollowed out eyes, wrinkles extending out from the edges and the lips cracked and grey. Even so, the white hair with blue highlights and the pagoda-like hat could not be mistaken. Fingernails loudly tore the fabric of Kokoro's clothes until they were dug into her skin, but it wasn't just this one ghastly figure who did this but a dozen or so that piled onto Kokoro and ripped into her very being. She could recognize each and every person that attacked her as someone she had wronged with her powers.
"P-Please…why are you doing this…?" was followed by a pained gasp as two fingernails plunged into her neck.
"You've doomed us…You're doomed us all!" A unified chant of heaves and echoes through Kokoro's ears, but once a hand clamped atop her mouth she was left only to feel her consciousness fading.
Dragged slowly into the winding spiral of darkness, Kokoro watched as a giant pair of glimmering yellow circles pierced through it all, followed by a pair of hands pushing aside the black fog and catching the violated menreiki in her grasp. Though the hands lowered, hope was not found in the blank eyes of the green-haired giant that had caught her. A cold sensation, one of depravity, crept into Kokoro's limping form as the giant brought her closer and closer.
"If I have you to myself…I'll never ever disappear! Heheheh, isn't this delightful, Kokoro?!" The bellows of the subconscious voice ruptured Kokoro's eardrums right as she was then whisked away into the vacuum of the giant's mouth, breaking away all remaining feeling in her body.
Before her sanity could be broken completely, Kokoro's body awoke with a jerk upright, her quivering hands wrinkling the top of the blanket her body laid under. Her heartbeat was all she registered until she looked and saw she was in the comfort of the Myouren Temple. Light crept through the shutters, giving some much needed warmth to the menreiki.
After looking around a little more, she focused on a smooth ceramic cup to the right. It was filled with a warm liquid, and smelled like an oriental flower. Slowly but weakly she picked it up and went to sip it, though a little liquid shook out and heated the back of her hand.
"O-Ow…" The pain confirming she was awake, she then took a drink and let the taste linger in her mouth just until it was safe to swallow. Her chest warmed as a river of relaxation flowed down her throat, and after cupping it in both hands she put the drink on her lap with a tiny smile.
Then one of the shutters slid open halfway, where her 'mother' Byakuren peeked in and let out a gasp.
"You're awake! Thank the Buddha…" The shutters swung open with a "Thud!" the priestess kneeling beside the bed in the link of an eye and laying a hand on Kokoro's head, the menreiki looking up as her heart calmed.
"M-Mommy…?"
Byakuren breathed a sigh of relief and pulled back, resting her hands on her lap before asking "Are you feeling better?" to her puzzled daughter.
"I-I…" Kokoro looks down, seeing that her skin was clean of sweat. The only heat she felt was in her hands, and her chest didn't have a single itch in it. Instead, there was a hollow feeling in place of that, and she couldn't tell if it was born of guilt or fear. After a minute, Byakuren let out a quiet grumble and glanced aside.
"Kokoro, it might be too soon but…As your mother, I have the right to know where you were yesterday." Kokoro looked up and saw the distraught look on her mother's face, her eyes not focusing her way.
"…I was just…I was just out with Tenshi helping a couple people. I don't how I got sick." She shook her head, and Byakuren closed her eyes with a nod.
"I-I see…Perhaps you caught something while you were out. And pushing yourself so hard-"
"I-I wasn't pushing myself! I took it easy, honest!" Kokoro's voice was defiant yet reassuring, eliciting shocked from her mother. Byakuren raised her hand and opened her mouth, but stopped without a word. The two looked away from each other, with Kokoro breaking the somber silence.
"I'm sorry mom…I'm sure you were worried about me."
"All of us were. You were suddenly dropped off on our doorstep with your body drenched in sweat, and your face looked so…So…" Byakuren bit her lower lip and tears were seen in her eyes. Kokoro felt curious about one thing though "I was dropped off? …But the only person there was…?"
The hollow shock on Kokoro's face was missed by her mother. Her mind was a maelstrom of confusion, the only thought coming through cleanly "Koishi…why?" could not be given an answer here. The cup of tea was put down, and Byakuren stood up as Kokoro tried to push herself out of bed.
"You need to rest! You just got over a dreadful illness!" The menreiki did not stop and limped forward, her leg as wobbly as a noodle. Byakuren bent forward and caught her collapsing body, but not without her murmuring "I need to go mom…There's someone I-I have to…"
"Not until you get some energy back Kokoro. Please, just…" Kokoro laid a hand against Byakuren's shoulder and propped herself up, her mother looking concernedly in silence.
"I have to help someone…I'm worried they're going to do something they'll regret."
"Who, Kokoro? Maybe I can handle that while you rest." Byakuren backed off once Kokoro was upright, trying hard to keep a smile even as the menreiki shook her head. Her mind was weak and in doubt. With a slip of tongue she said "Koishi…" and clamped her hands against her mouth with a gasp. Byakuren laid a finger to her chin and thought on that.
"The nearly enlightened satori? Well, I don't know what would be troubling her, but I can give it a shot. Just stay here and relax Kokoro…I'll have Miko come and assist you if necessary, and Ichirin and Murasa will be around as well." Byakuren patted Kokoro on the shoulder, gliding the hand to her chin to help her look at her genuinely smiling face and the assuring aura projected around her.
"O-Oh…ok…" A deflated voice came from a head hung low. Byakuren nodded then slowly backed away, looking over her shoulder for a few seconds before leaving the room, keeping the way out open. Perhaps out of trust? Kokoro had no idea what to make of things as they stood and with a tired face she slowly wandered out of the room, greeted by the blinding rays of the sun.
"Nhhhh…" She raised an arm as shade and wandered down the halls until her eyes adjusted, allowing her to see that there were some clouds out today. The attitude of the temple goers was chipper despite that. Kyouko was doing her usual singing and sweeping, Nue hovered over and teased her with bits of litter thrown about, though Unzan was nearby to stretch his hands out and catch what he could. When Kyouko finally noticed, she was not upset, but instead the three laughed happily.
The echoes of their laughter caught Kokoro's attention as she peeked behind a column. Kyouko happened to notice and waved with a perky proclamation "Good morning! You had us all worried Kokoro!" but the menreiki did not reciprocate and looked to her friends until her heart clenched and she ran off. Kyouko made a peep and broke into a sprint, but Unzan blocked the way with a gigantic hand and with a bellowing grumble shook his head.
Kokoro ran and ran through the halls until she was close to the always foggy graveyard, stopping to catch her breath near another column. She heaved for a few seconds, her chest in pain, but was able to lift her head up and speak clearly "Maybe I should slow down."
She walked out into the fog, finding a tall enough gravestone that she could just sit down in front of and be obscured. Once rested, she put her arms on her lap and closed her eyes to think "Mommy can't help her…I have to be the one to set things right, but how?"
"…Do I even want to?" As haunting memories of the satori's behavior played back in her head, Kokoro hunched her legs and laid her face against them. Her arms pressed the front of her legs enough to draw noise from the bone and her body quivered.
"I'm afraid…I'm so afraid. I-I can't be a hero, not when I'm a failure…" With her wallowing in loathing, the menreiki heard not the tip-toeing behind the gravestone, nor did she notice the shadow cast down from a strange tongued umbrella.
"SURPRISE!" This cheerful announcement thrust Kokoro's head back and hit the front of the gravestone. Her mind was left ringing with pain in the back of her skull, and as she rubbed the sore spot the voice let out an empathetic "Oooooh" while creeping out into view.
The adolescent looking Youkai stuck out their tongue innocently and looked at Kokoro with their heterochromia red/blue eyes, grasping their purple tongued umbrella behind their blue-green vest and light blue skirt. As a breeze swept through, the girl's turquoise hair swayed, and she folded her umbrella while blushing.
"A-Ah I'm sorry, I should've known it was you! Are you alright?" They shook their head back and forth, then held their hand out to Kokoro as she focused their way.
"Kogasa…" The ambusher recognized, the menreiki groaned and then attempted to stand up, wobbling halfway through but managing stability as she continued "…I'll be fine."
"That looked painful, I wouldn't want you to slumber again so soon." Kokoro paused for a second and glanced half-heartedly at the living umbrella.
"…You knew?"
"Y-Yeah! I put together a cup for you to drink out of while I was told to stay away from the temple. I hope it was good. I'm not the best craftsman, but I'm not the worst…Still, the framing of the insides to protect against the heat-" As Kogasa went on quite assuredly, the menreiki thought back to the cup and it's finer details, then smiled a little.
"Thank you Kogasa, I liked it." Kogasa perked up with mouth agape, her lips soon curling into a smile brimming with confidence that made both parties satisfied. Though it was not long before a more relaxed voice took part in the conversation.
"Ah, so it was not a wandering fellow but rather a friend. A gathering of tsukumogami…Must be fate at work here." The person that approached had a demeanor of absolutely tranquility. Not even an explosion could budge their gentle face. Her short red wavy hair, sporting white and black clothing and purple tie projected a rather "cool" presence towards her fellow Youkai, while the mallets attached to her hips and placed on the back of her shoes made it clear what object she had been born from. Kokoro faced the tsukumogami with slight surprise on her face.
"You're here too, Raiko?" Raiko's response was a subdued chuckle, then coolly she raised a mallet and twirled it between her fingers until brandishing it forward with some flourish.
"Not a hello, but a 'you're here too'? I suppose we haven't seen each other since that day, but…" She played up being offended, but the menreiki responded with a quick and respectful bow.
"I-I'm sorry…I'm glad to see you again." Kokoro's lack of energy got Raiko stating right away "Ah yes, as our umbrella friend said, you're recovering from a cold…Or perhaps something else has thrown off your groove, Kokoro?" The menreiki froze up, rising up only a couple seconds later, the puzzled eyes of Kogasa and the smile on Raiko's face weighing heavily on her heart. Yet she didn't say anything, glancing aside and holding her hands tensely before her skirt.
"…You know…" Raiko twirls the mallet around beside her face, closing her eyes and explaining with her serene honesty "I respect the judgments and wishes of your parents, I don't intend to come off as a rebel when I say this but…" A glide of her hand down the air strummed a tune as the mallet stuck beside her hip, ending with her extending that hand out towards Kokoro with a gentle smile.
"You can be open around us. We're here to help." Kokoro's eyes were wide for a bit, but they were dots compared to Kogasa's bulging peepers. The umbrella pointed at herself and stuttered "W-Wait…Me?" Raiko simply nodded her head with a smile.
"We're all tsukumogamis, thus, we are able to understand each other quite easily." She then paused while Kogasa registered the words with a tilt and a stutter of "W-Well…I-I'm not wise…I'm only smart when it comes to crafting stuff…I mean, can an umbrella be worth anything else?" Raiko and Kokoro's eyes met, and the menreiki let out a slight groan while thinking things through.
"I-I don't know if you could understand, but I'm willing to try. I…I can't let mommy handle this alone, she doesn't know what she's getting into." Kogasa looked at her after and asked "Hold on, Byakuren could be in trouble? What were YOU getting into, Kokoro?!" Her tone clearly showed the bewilderment towards the menreiki's trouble-finding nature, especially as she pushed her face close to Kokoro's.
"I-It's not like that Kogasa. It's…" Kokoro paused, crossing her arms back and looking aside while she slowly and awkwardly explains "T-There's this person…She-uh…THEY are odd. They aren't exactly…in control of themselves. Something about me allows them to feel better, feel more in control…But they are scared of me changing because they could disappear. I don't know how to help them…A-And I'm scared of seeing them again because they couldn't accept the answer I gave them before. If I don't help them though, they…Well, I don't know WHAT they could end up doing…"
Raiko paid heed to those words for a good while, nodding her head and turning around to gather her thoughts. She swung a mallet around beside her shoulder while Kogasa leaned her way with an intrigued expression until Raiko suddenly swung around and pointed her way.
"Kogasa!"
"Eeep! Yes?! What?!" Kogasa fumbled back upright with a loose grip on her umbrella, and Raiko glided her hand out before asking gently "You experienced babysitting, I believe you mentioned. Tell us, what was that like?" With her gaze moving around in confusion the umbrella girl settled on leaning to the left and gathering her thoughts perfectly.
"W-Well…There were some rowdy kids I had to deal with. You can tell them what to do, but they will try and be disobedient. I found I had a lot more success when I didn't try to control them and worked with them on their level."
"Thinking like a child, in other words. Fittingly, a tsukumogami can have young minds depending on how they were born, and learn to develop their own ids, ego, and superegos. But, I don't want to sidetrack onto a tract on that so I'll get to the point…" Raiko tucked her hands into her coat pockets and continued with a calm gaze towards the puzzled Kokoro "The solution to your problem is simpler than you realize. Meet the person you want to help as an equal. Do not deny their request, offer to guide them through their problems."
"I-I don't get it…" Kokoro admitted with her head slowly shaking, yet Raiko had an answer right away.
"Be a friend, Kokoro. The vibe I get from this is that you two are connected…Whether that's fate at work or not, I cannot say. It's your decision though whether you want to listen to this whimsy at work." Next up, Kogasa turned to look at Kokoro and leaned close enough so her ensuing whisper would be heard.
"Kokoro…I think I know who you're talking about now. It's that girl that lost her subconscious, isn't it?" But the menreiki does not pay attention, her eyes looking a little blank as her consciousness retreated into the depths of her mind, dredging up the memories she shared with the satori both good and bad. They formed a whirlpool around her drifting body, giving her perfect perspective of them all as they glided by.
Reviewing them one after the other, there was something she had difficulty accepting. Even the worst of the memories, the theft of the Mask of Hope and the incident the day before, couldn't be looked at in as much of a negative light as she would be inclined to admit. Instead, Raiko and Kogasa's words got her thinking "Koishi has never truly done me wrong…She's always had the mentality of a child, and all she's done was just her way of grabbing attention. And all I've done is treat her like a pest, a nemesis…"
The innards of Kokoro's mind got soggy, the memories blurring up as she took her hands to her face both in the consciousness and in reality. But on the outside, her eyes welled up with tears she couldn't control, concern beaming towards her from the gazed of her company.
"K-Kokoro…?! I-I didn't mean to do this, honest…!" Kogasa's tone was frantic and full of regret, with her taking the umbrella and hoping to use it's tongue to clean the tears off, but the menreiki just pulled her hands down and had an odd 'smile' on her face as tears leaked through the creases of her closed eyes.
"I-It's my fault again…! W-Why am I such an idiot…? I should've been helping HER all this time, and yet…I guess a part of me just couldn't get over a petty grudge! I-I have to make this right you guys!" Without a second thought, Kokoro turned and sprinted off, her feet kicking up a wind that pushed Kogasa beside Raiko.
"S-She's didn't even say thanks or goodbye…" While Kogasa was flustered, Raiko cracked her earnest of smiles and said "That's fine. What matters is that she's following her heart…After all, Kokoro is nothing BUT heart." Kogasa sighed, supposing she couldn't disagree.
"T-Though uhhh…Shouldn't we have tried to stop her? I don't think she was meant to leave the grounds today. Byakuren was pretty firm on that." Raiko widened her eyes and with her mouth agape stuttered "S-Such is the whims of fate…T-That we'd have to endure whatever punishment she gives us." It was something those two would have to reflect on, but for Kokoro…It was the beginning of the longest day of her life.
Next Time: The Tiniest Hero