Thanks for being patient with me!

I know the story is kinda at a stand-still right now, but things should perk up soon ;)

I hope I can hear more from all of you on what you think so far and what I should improve-

Enjoy!

Of The Spark And Heart

Part 1

Chapter 25

"Well this should be interesting."

It was a bored and obviously disinterested comment made by the human beside the bright yellow youngling, both of their attentions on the front entrance. The young 'Bot looked down on the darker-skinned company in confusion.

The man had his arms crossed over the rails of the scaffold he stood upon, his watchful gaze sweeping those below. He seemed content, almost relaxed. Looking away again, Bee saw almost every one of the Autobots of the base inside the room. Even Ratchet was there, standing over by the wall, speaking to Optimus. Humans of all titles where walking around his peds, coming together in a group or standing off alone. Fera was sitting with a middle-aged human, two other of his species beside him. They were a light-haired female and a youngling male, sitting on both sides of him. Sam.

So many good memories had become related to this small human, and yet to see him with the very people who had taken away his friend didn't make him angry at all. Or sad really. In fact, he was rather happy at seeing all of them. And now that his new friend Fera was getting alone with them so well, he was especially happy. Well, he had been until Captain Robert Epps had said what he did. Was that sarcasm in his tone?

"You've told Sam what's going on?" Epps spoke up, causing Bee to snap back to attention and give a nod. Prior to this meeting, he had been sent out to retrieve the specified male just earlier the kalon before. Pretty shortly after, he found out just how extremely difficult it was to use the radio waves as he'd wanted to explain the situation at hand. He even used voice capacitor a few times, but only for a couple of words. Never had a conversation taken so long before his vocal processor had been crushed... "Good. I feel bad for the kid. Especially since he's got a family now. Carly seems so calm with all this, but it's got to be gettin' to them." Epps went on, still peering down at the group.

Suddenly, Fera laughed and the female bonded to Sam -Carly was her designation- did as well. It was a nice thing to see her smile, now more than ever considering the fear she had put them all through the kalon before. The medic human Doctor Shelby had refused to allow anyone to see her or let her leave the care of her Cybertronian counterpart. Ratchet agreed and no one had been able to see her until now.

"Look for the girl with the broken smile...miss no, no it's all good...tryin' to hide the tears." Bee chirped sadly. Epps gave a short laugh and he reached over to pat the 'Bot's arm. "Don't think so dark Bee, she's stronger than she looks. Her daddy was a heck of a guy before he died, and I doubt she's any different from him."

Bumblebee could see the young female before him and he saw how much she really needed that bumbling, talkative, rambling side of Sam that Bee had found so amusing so many times throughout their decacycles together. But truly, the only thing he saw was her hidden suffering. Her body couldn't be in its best conditions and she seemed like she was only forcing her smiles. Although, Carly could be that caring friend she deserved while Daniel could be a brotherly figure to bring out that true happiness. No longer would she be alone, no matter what she did to push them away.

Yeah, that's right, he'd heard that conversation between Solas and his charge. Every word.

The mech in thought was nowhere to be seen, not even taking his position anywhere in the room as ordered by their leader. But that was mainly for those who were leaving for Washington. He technically didn't apply, but would a few words to his charge be so difficult? Bee hated seeing two friends fight, even more so when they threatened to break off the ties they shared.

The mixed-spy fembot Stratis walked into the room now with Hawktail right behind. Their expressions were as unreadable as ever, even with their reunion. They were both odd, and the similar personalities they shared furthered that strangeness. Bee caught the optic of Greenlight and he waved, seeing the smaller fembot alongside her partner Wheeljack. They both waved back and Bee grinned before moving on. Rethalia was near her sparkmate, also speaking with Ratchet. She seemed oddly energetic today, almost glowing with alertness. "Is everyone here?" Optimus Prime, leader of the Autobots, sparkmate to a Prime, nobler than any before him besides Primus himself, and humble to the least of praise, stepped forward.

A general link opened between each Cybertronian in the room, allowing Optimus to acquire a silent count of his troops. Everyone was here- sans Solas of course.

Sideswipe and Sunstreaker were also there, even though they were ordered to stay behind with Solas and the others. They didn't seem particularly happy with this news, or joyful at all to be honest. But they took them with only minimal complaint. Most of which had come to Bee personally.

Seeming satisfied, Optimus nodded. "Very well. As you all should know, our mission in a short time's reach is to relocate to the Earth city of Washington D.C by oh-six-hundred in two days' time. I will be leading this escort of our charges while my warriors shall be stationed on guarding duty around our perimeter." Optimus lifted a servo and presented a holomap. Seeing this, Bee stood a little taller in pride. He had made that one.

Six flashing lights showed on the map, each with the initials of each Cybertronian. Optimus showed the map to the gathered crowd of humans and Cybertronians, placing it on voice command as he did so. "The plans we have developed in advance to this departure are shown here. While I am to lead this group, I wish to see the gathered Autobots in this formation." the map zoomed out and the lights showed up in two separate groups of three. Bumblebee hurriedly looked around for his initials, which he found moved to the small bunch beside the English letters of O.P- Optimus Prime.

"The human accompaniment that has been offered to us was turned down because of the proliferated height of risk and the view that our Decepticon adversaries will already be aided at locating our positions with such large groups of our kind." Bumblebee took note of the way the seriousness crept into the leader's voice and the protests building around them. Footsteps from the scaffold beside Bee had him turning towards the noise. Epps turned back around and Bee saw him roll his eyes before he took a trained at-attention pose of a military officer. The one he had been so obviously annoyed about was none other than Secretary Kepler.

"And you feel like this will be any safer for Miss Lennox, her daughter, and Mister Witwicky's family seeing as this 'proliferated height of risk' you speak of is going to find it easier to locate your position? We had not agreed to this Prime." he reached the railing and Bee looked back for Optimus' reaction. He had a look of sternness to his faceplates that could confidently be described as disappointment.

"It is best we send off our larger of groups because of the danger Secretary. If our smaller of my troops were to be discovered, then they would have no chance in defense of themselves or the charges they carried. Instead, I find it-"

"I don't care Optimus, people's lives are at stake here. If you want to take risks, do not do so with such costly measures." Kepler interrupted. Optimus' mandible close tightly and Bee could see the small gears there grinding over one another. "My job here is to make sure things like that don't happen in the first place." the human male gestured towards Fera, who in turn jumped to her feet. She seemed about to say something, but the warning servo from Optimus had her staying quiet. "She had intertwined relations with my race beforehand to these undertakings Secretary, and I see things as far from her doings as possible. The fact of her importance is also in consideration with any form of actions involved with her." he pointed out.

Bumblebee hid the smirk that threatened to cross his faceplates. That rude human was definitely being put in his place, just as he so rightfully deserved. But he didn't seem to think it that way. Instead, he had a derisive frown on his own fleshy face. "To which you fail to discuss with me." he stated blandly. Bee glanced down at Epps, who held himself straight and still. The male flicked his eyes up at Bee and proceeded to point a finger down his throat, creating a strange, but humorous gagging expression on his features. Bee chuckled quietly, but hid it as a cough when the Secretary looked over at him.

"And I have come to notice that you canceled my orders of airborne transportation. I do not see it in your jurisdiction to do so Optimus, and I feel as if it would be the fastest and safest way to relocate our few human priorities."

"Had you not realized in your scheme that surely Decepticon tracker drones would have undoubtedly detected this change? Airborne crafts of this planet are seemingly blatant to the abilities of yet retaining complete secrecy. Noted, some have come to delude our radar, but your versions of civilian flight is most a 'beacon in the dark' as you would say." he explained, slowly coming forward to stand before the human. Bumblebee stood taller when his commander came closer, locking his servos behind him. His optics watched the confrontation from the edge of his vision, making sure to pay attention to every moment.

Secretary Kepler also stepped toward the rail, shooting a glance at the now-still Epps as he passed. The distant suspicion in his features showed he must have noticed something exchanged between the 'Bot and airforce captain. "As that may be," he went on, turning back to the Prime, "our aircraft is far faster and safer than if they were to travel with you and your troops. We would be able to get there in less than a day- sooner than the estimate you have made for abilities." his hands curled over the railing and he held a steady gaze with Optimus. Bumblebee felt like saying something, but both his training as a scout and crushed voice capacitor prevented him from doing it. But there was just something about this man that irked him.

"We are unable to assist you in the skies Secretary." Optimus pointed out, with a calmness that Bumblebee wouldn't have had when speaking to this human. "My airborne soldiers are literally one in number, whom is in San Diego at the moment. The dangers are far greater in your views than mine, suggesting that we are equipped to defend ourselves and our human comrades."

"But what if you're not? What if you are outnumbered?"

"We are always outnumbered."

"That's not a particularly encouraging statement Optimus."

"And was it so when your country defended itself for freedoms to which they thought right hundreds of your years ago? You were outnumbered and outmatched, yet you still succeeded in seizing victory."

"That has nothing to do with the situation we are in now."

"Does it not? I feel as though it is quite similar."

The Secretary tightened his grip on the rails. Bee noted that he was surely losing this argument, but the human found enough stubbornness to continue on.

"And just what importance do these civilians have to you Optimus?" he demanded, obviously frustrated. ~He's very controlling~ Bee commented over a private comlink to Optimus. The Prime paused for only a sparkbeat before stealing a darting look at the yellow scout. ~Yes, as is most of our allies here. I do not blame them, for it is only in their best interests that things stay in order.~ "That is of Autobot concern, not your own." he replied verbally to the Secretary.

"Just what makes you think you have the right to keep secrets from us like that?" Kepler challenged.

Bumblebee grew uncomfortable whenever he saw the narrowed optics of his leader and the disdain on his military friend's face. This human really was trying to push things, and if he thought they wouldn't react to it, than he was sorely mistaken. It did take a lot of courage to stand up to a high-ranking official like he was however, and Bee tried keeping in mind that all he wished for was the security of his home. Well, at least the 'Bot hoped so. That fact was becoming a little obscured as of late.

"You agreed to the terms that my race's privacies would be in clause with your government's set values in the allegiance contract between us. If I so wish it, I will not share my opinions on the decisions I make concerning a priority's safety."

Optimus lifted a servo and grabbed the railing nearby the Secretary. It wasn't a threatening move, but Kepler backed away all the same. He let his body bend back slightly to see Prime better, but his smaller size was definitely an intimidating disadvantage.

It became clear for a few nanoclicks that the man seemed at a lost for words. Bee looked between Optimus and the male human in concern, seeing as Prime didn't take well to the hazard to sentient rights. If he thought Fera and Sam's family would be ok, then they would be. It was just a matter of trusting these words of the Autobot commander- which most already did.

Secretary Kepler gained a look of displeasure and he held his fists tight by his side. It didn't seem like he was timid anymore. "Yes, it did. But in this situation, your opinions just may get two, not one, but two families killed." he pointed out seriously. Bumblebee froze, his limbs locking. As much as he hated to admit it, the human had a point. This would be dangerous- more than not since the journey is such a long one. Optimus seemed to have realized this too, lifting himself up to stand straighter with a weighty look on his faceplates.

"I've realized this." he agreed in a softer tone. "Yet I trust my comrades and so should you. I believe Miss Lennox's family as well as Mister Witwicky's will be protected until they are placed in a more secured location."

~What is he talking about?~ Bumblebee looked to Ratchet from his place besides a very calm-looking Rethalia Prime. Ratchet quickly looked from Bee back to Optimus. ~Optimus and I have just had this discussion.~ he paused, maybe unsure, ~There is an underground structure located deep in the Rocky Mountains- large enough for both Cybertronians and the humans related with our cause. Fera and her mother will be transferred there when Solas is recovered while Sam will be sent with you to Diego Garcia.~

Bee's optic ridges rose and he turned back to Optimus and Kepler as their conversation began again. "I'll trust you more when an unfamiliar enemy isn't breathing down our backs and you get your job done." the slightest of nods towards the humans below came from Kepler and Optimus' optics flicked from behind him back to Kepler. He didn't seem approving at all. Secretary Kepler took one last sweeping view of the gathered before him and he turned, walking past Epps and climbing the stairs.

When the man had disappeared, Bumblebee relaxed and he saw everyone else do the same- all except for Optimus. He turned back to the room, which had gone deathly quiet. His expression was hard and unreadable as it held such grim seriousness. It caused a small wave of uncertainty to come from Bumblebee's spark, and he looked to Rethalia for help. She had almost an identical set on her faceplates, but when she saw Bee, that softened. She grinned reassuringly and Bee calmed instantly.

But the shape moving in the corner of Bee's peripheral had his joyful smile gone. It was a taller figure than him, all in silver, with optics as blue as the oceans that dressed the Earth. His hesitance was obvious and he just hovered by the entrance to the rear of the building. He only had to shift his attention around for a moment before finding who it was he wished to see.

Bumblebee found Fera to see him as well, her posture tense and frozen at the sight of him. She was on her feet with her fingers splayed across the tabletop. The very air between them seemed to twist and shrivel as the mood darkened. But before the small female could call out her Guardian, Bee grew shocked to see that the mech just simply turned and walked out of the room. Without a single, minute word. Fera backed down in certain disappointment.

"That 'Bot needs to get his head together." Epps commented, standing beside Bumblebee once again. Bee sighed through his vents and he watched Fera sadly. She seemed so conflicted- so hurt to see him just leave without the conversation she must have expected. "He ain't in his right mind right now, and I don't think Fera's the only one he'll lose if he keeps it up."

Bumblebee wished he could just ignore Epps' comment. He wished it could be a lie and he wished that Solas and Fera were on their way to the friendship they shared again. But he just couldn't. There was something different about them, more pain than anger. Something was wrong. Really, truly, wrong.

Rethalia came forward and laid a servo on her sparkmate's arm, coming around to his side and urging him to lean down. They whispered a few things to each other in hushed tones before Optimus stood again. With one casting glance to a distracted Bee, he placed a servo on Rethalia's spinal support. "Everyone," he called, turning his cranial unit forward again, "roll out."

The ring of the bell was high and stuttering, reverberating around the room in that familiar tone that every and any student would be looking forward to at the end of the day. Fera dropped the pencil in her grip and leaned back in her seat, locking her hands and turning them inside-out to stretch her sore limbs. Finished.

The teacher looked up at the sound of the alarm, her grey hair swaying with the movement. Her chunky, blue earrings dangled against her wrinkled face, bouncing off and swinging over and over like a pendulum. She set the paper in her hands down -which was obviously a magazine, though she seemed to attempt at making it look like work- and surveyed her class. "Alright everyone, turn in your tests face-down and proceed in a mannered order to the door-" she cut off as teenagers of the male and female gender stampeded to the front to throw their papers down.

Fera rose slowly herself, watching the crowd as they noisily exited the room, leaving the stack they had created in a haphazard mess. Fera walked up to the old desk and laid her paper on top, getting a small grin from the teacher. "Best for last?" she joked in her kind, old-lady sort of way. The teen before her grinned as well and she readjusted the strap on the bag she was carrying. The books inside shifted and leaned it to one side, pinching the skin on her arm. Fera shoved her thumb under the strap and shrugged the shoulder. "Don't count on it. I haven't studied in months."

"Well it seems you'll do fine. You were ahead of the class before, so I don't see why now would be any different." her lips pulled into a smile and her eyes crinkled. "But it seems someone has come to cheer you on." she jerked her head towards the window and Fera looked out of it curiously.

Sitting by the curb, doors shut tight, was a richly-yellow Camaro. Bumblebee had been assigned to keep watch over her while she took her final exams and to transport her to and from the base. This had been the first time outside for Fera since coming to that base almost three months earlier, and now she was going back. She really felt like she was in jail at the moment.

Fera sighed and jerked her bag. "You could say that." she agreed, slightly irritated. She wanted to go for a walk on the track behind the school before Bee would come for her, but it looked like that wasn't happening. For all she knew, he could have been sitting there for a while.

She left her teacher and classroom behind, walking slowly through the crowded halls of the school before she was forced back into that base again. I'm officially being held against my will, she decided bluntly. My friend hates me and I'm going to be hiding for the rest of my meager life. Upon reaching the front doors, Fera leaned against them and held back a few seconds to let her eyes adjust to the blinding light that was the sun. The sun. Actual, natural, sunlight. Not florescent, fake vitamin D for her increasingly pasty skin.

The warmth was fantastic, especially more so because it was early summer, giving it that solid hotness she craved. Drafts of chilly air was always flowing through the base, never allowing her to get completely comfortable at any time.

She traveled across the landing and sucked in the wonderful, fresh air of the outside world. Just one last time. It was so magnificent- so healing and amazing to the worn-out body of misused muscles and lungs. One may think she was just overreacting from the joy she gained from seeing the blue sky and the short, green grasses, but then they would have to realize that she had not been outside of those concrete walls for well past what was probably considered healthy. And with her leaving for Washington tomorrow, she figured she wouldn't for a long while. For all she was leaving behind, one thought truly pinched her heart and caused a sense of saddness to overcome her. Solas and herself wouldn't be seeing one another for a good stretch of time until he got his armoring and was able to travel again.

But he had seen her those few weeks ago when Optimus had explained the formations and had set up that practice-run for the 'Bots to use when the actual date came up, and he hadn't said a word to her. It upset her, yet she had a brief knowing that this would happen. What she had said may have gone a little over the top, but it was best for him to know that she didn't feel like she deserved the kind of sacrifices he was willing to make for her. It was his pride that was getting in his way, she was sure of it. So if he wanted to get mad about it, then oh well.

Fera brushed her fingers through her hair and reached down to open the door to Bee's side. It popped open and she was able to climb in, throw her bag on the floor, and recline back. Her spine was stiff and she felt her shoulders tense as well, which she rolled to relax better. Dots danced before her eyes and she wondered for a second if she should be worried.

"How was school today honey?" it was an older-sounding broadcast of most likely some dialog from a commercial or movie, projecting nicely from the radio. Fera gave the device an incredulous look and she sighed, placing both of her hands behind her head. "It was fine, thank you." she answered. It was a little weird responding to that particular clip from the young 'Bot, but it wasn't anything too different from what he usually used. She guessed that he didn't feel like picking out the specific words today. He did this every so often- mostly when he seemed lazy or unable to find the right things he was looking for. "I'm guessing we're heading back for base?"

There was a cheerful chirp from the 'Bot and Fera grinned, twisting her neck to look out the window. Blurred shapes of trees and the guard rails of the highway passed by just as the streaks of neighboring cars did. "I wish I could be as excited as you are, but truthfully, I'm not looking forward to the confinement again." she blinked and noted the silence that followed her comment. Bee wasn't usually untalkative.

"Bee?" she voiced, switching her eyes back to the radio. "Do you have something on your mind?" the yellow Autobot swerved into another lane and took position behind a slow Mazda. The mech paused with her question still hanging in the air and Fera removed her hands from behind her skull. Now this was plain odd of him.

But as soon as she started to get concerned, she heard the static buzzing of the stations and she let her expression soften. "I wish I could carry her...all I ever wanted was you...with the lips of an angel." he drew out, getting another, wider smile from the human in his passenger seat. Fera put together the missing pieces in the songs and their meanings, getting a cheerful feel to her sore form. "So it's a girl?" she shook her head and bit her tongue, "Er, I mean fembot?" there was a deep buzz from Bee and Fera laughed. "That's cute! Little Bee's got a crush." she 'awed' and made kissy faces at the dash, to which Bumblebee responded to quite shyly.

"Who is it? Someone on base?"

"No."

"Oh, so she's on one of the other bases?"

Again, the 'Bot paused and Fera giggled. "It's ok to like someone Bee, every human does it at some point. I liked a few people growing up, and now you have your own little love. Does she know?" she leaned forward, her eyes wide. Bumblebee's small noises died down into a fading edge and Fera patted the dashboard. "That's ok. She will eventually." Fera leaned back, but just as quickly, she sat up again. "Oh! I could be your wing-man!" she offered.

Obviously, Bumblebee didn't know really what a wing-man was, because he agreed way too quickly to have actually thought about it. But Fera didn't mind, she was just excited that she could be the very person to allow love to blossom between two aliens. One of whom had become a valued friend to her. It was actually something to look forward to despite this less-than thrilling road trip she was about to take.

It was a shorter four-hour trek than Fera would have originally thought. Maybe it was the conversations that came so easily with the young 'Bot that passed the time, or maybe it was just the lighter feeling she had gained from her small time outside. Whatever it was, she liked it.

Bumblebee's cabin bounced around when they reached the stretch of land that was Forest Park, having Fera hold on to the sides of the seat. Her body hitched in the air and slammed into the door. "Ow!" she cried as her elbow jammed against the handle. Bee's speed slowed and Fera winced, rubbing the limb. "I'm ok, go ahead." she assured, noticing the boulder in the distance. Bumblebee sped up and came to the base entrance, waiting patiently as it opened. When the door was out of the way, the yellow Camaro traveled down the twisting, lit path towards the final lobby doors.

A brighter, yet less concentrated glow came from ahead and Fera sank back into the seat. Maybe if she could convince Bee, he would sneak out for one last drive. Just a little longer, was that too much to ask? The air from Bee's open window on the way here had been welcomed, but it wasn't the same. There was still the knowing that she would return to the concrete; the bland foods; the overly-concerned Autobots, and a doctor who denied any chance for her for the outside world.

The all-too-familiar view of the base curtained over her entire vision, completed with the high-hanging scaffolds, and wandering personnel or occasional 'Bot. "Home sweet home." she muttered resentfully.

Bumblebee moved further into the base, turning to the side as he slowly stopped. Fera tested the door, seeing it was already open, and she grabbed her bag. "Thanks Bee." she then exited and stepped away just as the almost normal sounds of his transformation took place. At first, Fera had actually feared the sound, seeing as a giant mechanical being came from it as a result. But now, she found it as a kind of comforting sound. It just meant that the being was alive and well, giving her no reason to worry. It was something she could say she looked forward to when seeing one of these creatures. Fera dropped her shoulder and kept walking, throwing her bag aside. She wouldn't need whatever was inside now, especially more so since everything she owned would probably be searched. It fell to the floor and allowed her to move on freely, keeping her focus solely on the doorway before her.

That over-protective, hot-headed, emotionally unstable, plasma-sucking, scrap-licking, rude, gun-slinging, rust-kissing, stubborn, teal-eyed hellion was more trouble than he was worth. He'd saved her life already, nearly lost his own, comforted her multiple times, refused to make eye-contact with her, and made her angrier than any other person that she had come in contact with. Except Kepler maybe.

But was it really so hard to say goodbye?

Fera didn't think too much of the lack of farewell from her recovering Guardian, or that he seemed to be avoiding her whenever he could. She'd intentionally kept away the questions eating at her for over a month now since Skywarp had attacked them just so Solas wouldn't be more stressed than he already was. But ever since he hadn't shown his metal butt around her the past few weeks, she had become both worried and irritated. Yes, maybe that was mostly her fault, saying he should resign as her Guardian and all, but she hadn't truly, deeply meant it. She regretted every word she'd said as she'd said them. And she'd hoped that he would realize that.

From the looks of things, he hadn't and she was utterly alone once again. Her mother was always somewhere around the base with Hound or -surprisingly- Wheeljack, and that left her daughter to wander into things best left be. About two days ago, Fera had set out to try and find her hidden comrade, only to come up empty-handed and sent back to 'her room' when Ratchet caught her peeking around the energon machine. The feelings of guilt and sadness grew inside of her for just what she had done, especially now so that she'd come to understand that Solas took to her advice so well. Of all the things to listen to me about, this is what he decides to cooperate with? she huffed in thought.

The door to the room opened and she stepped through, making sure to take extra time by the frame. Last time she had come in too fast, it had gone off and she'd been forced into a search by one of the nearby officers. Oh how she enjoyed these metal-detector doorframes built into the entrances.

She trudged across the floor and groaned before throwing herself over the bed. There was an oddly comforting feeling that came from the feel of the sheets that lay beneath her fingers. And to think, not too long ago, she had loathed the blankets.

Fera let herself relax into the mattress and she reached over to grab the jack slung across the surface. It was the military uniform that Doctor Shelby had given her with her father's name tag still on it. The edges were a little torn and it was slightly blackened from heat exposure, but overall, it was recognizable. Which was more than enough for Fera to allow herself to hold dearly to it. The pin dug into the thinner fabric of her shirt, but this only made her hold on harder. Why had he left her so suddenly? Couldn't he of stayed just for another stretch? I know he suffered, she commented silently to herself. But I can't help wishing that he'd of hung on just a little longer.

The day crashed on her and Fera brought up her knees to curl into herself. The drawing pad she had now completely filled with nothing but random sketches of Autobots and one very soon-to-be unlucky Decepticon -who still to this day haunted the back of her eyelids- laid close by. It was so unfair what had happened to her father. It was so unexpected and he'd deserved so much more. There could have been a better way for him to go- many of which that Fera could come up with in seconds of thought. But none would have been a drawn-out end like that. He had deserved so much more...

Fera let her tears stream hotly down her cheeks, allowed them to bleed into the jacket, and released the racking shakes that seized her. They came from both the grief she bore and the constrictions now in her chest. As her sadness grew, that feeling did as well. Hope was trying to break into her barrier, to see to her unhappiness and to comfort whatever ailed her. She wanted to reach out and embrace Hope, just to have that moment of peace and the beautiful relief that came with it. Just for one moment, she'd liked to be able to accept the reassurance she didn't deserve and hold it until she burst. But she couldn't. Nor would she. Someone else should have what she could- they should be able to experience that for themselves and not let her take it from them. She could think of a million other more right choices. Ones whose lives stretched on for millennium over...

Just as her trembles peaked, she felt the whimpers crawling out of her. The tightness in her ribs held down with a new pressure, preventing a single breath from completeness. The taut muscles in her body jerked and twitched, as if she had gone through some lengthy exercise. Her teeth clamped shut with the oncoming pain and the insured discomfort to come. Hope pounded at her block, trying desperately to reach her and figure out what was affecting her. There was an odd anger that came from it, coursing through her and making her agitated as well. No, she wouldn't allow it. She would get through this on her own and by herself if so need be it.

Suddenly, the ligaments in her spine snapped and she arched back, her head thrown with her mouth spread to allow her silent cries escape. The fire encircled her limbs and charged through to her very bones, circulating in her nerves and crashing with the spasms rattling her frame. Her vice grip on the jacket was more reaction to the abrupt episode than of comfort, for she didn't even remember it being there anymore. Her mind was swirling on the edge of darkness, roaring with blood while her resolve shattered piece by piece.

Her mouth fell wider and she squeezed her eyes, forcing herself back into the fetal position to hold her knees. Her arms cooperated, but her bodily movements didn't cease, getting harder and harder to control as Hope got more and more anxious. The entity inside of her rolled over the block and blanketed it as if it were trying to find some form of hole or break in her barrier. That was when it hit her.

Hope was the cause of her pain.

As quickly as she could, Fera dropped the wall between her and Hope and the reassuring light poured in instantly. It flooded into her system and enveloped her very core, becoming every part that was her physical body while also coming to deeply surround her mind and thoughts. Hope reached for her consciousness, trying to understand and attempting to delve into who or what she was. It went further and poked around the impossible depths that it had reached. Surprised at the intensity, Fera shut off Hope to clear whatever sudden and unexpected intrusion had entered her.

Immediately, the feelings of stress and spastic reaction overtook her, forcing her to throw open the barrier again. Hope came back with a slower approach this time, cautiously crawling over her and releasing a calming sensation as it went. One by one, Fera's muscles relaxed and she sighed into the pillow. Why had she rejected this feeling again? Oh yeah, she didn't think it was meant for her.

Hope once again came upon her brain and it carefully brushed against her emotions and the feelings she possessed. It saw the pain and regret and grief she held and the horrendous afflictions she put herself through every time she blocked it out. All those times she never wished to know what it offered and to deny each attempt at her relief from her world. She wanted no peace from it, to never experience what others so rightfully deserved. For a moment, it hesitated. Maybe it was surprised at her.

But then it moved on anyway, grabbing hold of her very thoughts and digging through her emotions. It hugged them so near to itself and curled through the blackness and the dark realities so that it could become apart of that suffering. Realization overcame her that Hope had never wanted to take her pain away. Nor did it wish to replace it. It just wanted to experience it with her. It wanted to go along for the ride so she wouldn't be alone.

Fera felt a wide grin stretch across her face and she gripped the jacket in her arms tighter. Hope knew she wanted to find the lessons taught in pain and grief, and it understood her thirst for independence. But there was that more vulnerable side of her that she would need that support for. She needed not a shield, but a friend.

Hope circled through her and seemed to relish in the freedom she allowed it. It mainly focused on her heart and the complexities of her human mind. Yet when it came to her more personal knowledges, such as her name and family and basic values, it grew unsure. Then, something, a noise perhaps, but so quiet that she wondered if she'd imagined it. It was like the breath of a ghost across the ride of a breeze- so soft that if it were said to her ear, it wouldn't have been heard. But it instead was across her mind. Here, it was so clear and precise.

Who are you?

It was Hope.

Are we getting closer?

Maybe. Maybe not. Don't cha just hate me by now? :)

So this weekend is Easter weekend, and I just wanted to say Happy Easter!

-for all of those who celebrate it of course:)-

Thanks for reading and I hope to hear what you all think so far :D