"What's with you today?" Anya asked, looking at Lexa with worry. "I mean, you've been weird lately, but you look... I don't know, like a zombie."

Lexa groaned, quite aware of her completely unusual mood. Clarke hadn't texted her at all throughout Sunday, and not at all so far on Monday, and the school day was nearly over. Lexa had thought about texting Clarke herself, but any sort of apology she could muster via phone communication wouldn't be enough to express how stupid she felt. Clarke must be thinking that, right? If she hadn't texted Lexa, it was definitely because she thought that Lexa kissing her had been downright insane? Finn almost may have spoken to her about the previous night.

She'd gotten very little sleep on Sunday night, and so now she had a total of about six hours over a period of three days. "Lexa? Are you stoned or something?"

"What?" she demanded immediately. "Why would I be stoned? I've never done drugs, Anya."

"Can't be sure of anything anymore," the other girl muttered, as their teacher closed the classroom door and began to speak.

Lexa lowered her voice. "Judgmental much?"

"How was your night out with Luna yesterday?" Anya asked, sounding angry despite her whispering. "You and her seem to be hanging out a lot lately."

"If you think I've replaced you with Luna, you're crazy," Lexa hissed. "You and her are totally different people, not at all interchangeable. I can be friends with both of you at once!"

"Miss Woods," their teacher suddenly snapped, causing Lexa to jump in surprise. "Would you like to share your conversation with the rest of us?"

"No, sir."

"Then please do us the favor of shutting your mouth," he continued, narrowing his eyes. Lexa tried not to roll her eyes, and went to say something else to Anya, only to find her best friend giving her full attention to the lesson.

After class, Lexa didn't let Anya escape to leave the school. "We need to talk," she said to her best friend, who looked incredibly unhappy about the statement.

"Clearly, Lexa, you don't want to talk to me lately. You tune me out half of the time, and the other half is when you're trying to justify how weird you've been lately. I don't understand what this whole cool phase is. You're plenty cool the way you are, you know?" Anya insisted, sounding defeated all of the sudden.

Lexa softened, grabbing her best friend's hand and pulling her out of the school and out to the field in the back. Sports teams were meeting up in separate areas of it, but Lexa led Anya back to the treeline, and they sat there. It was their old hangout spot, from freshman year. "I know that I don't need all the weird party shit to be cool."

"What? Wasn't that the whole point of your crazy summer?"

Lexa cringed a little. "Yes. I've since realized that it was stupid – trying to change who I am doesn't make me cool. But this summer is what taughtme that. And the thing is, I haven't changed. I've just realized that there's more to me than what there once was. And personally, I feel much cooler just knowing that about myself. I like having more than one friend – no offense of course, you are my best friend."

"None taken. I have other friends."

"Luna?"

Anya's lip curled. "Hardly. Tristan – you know him? We started talking over the summer. And I mean, Lincoln."

"He's your brother, he hardly counts," Lexa claimed, shaking her head.

"You don't know what it's like to have a sibling, so shut it," Anya insisted playfully. "Anyway, you were saying, about knowing yourself and whatnot?"

"Yeah," Lexa said, sighing. "I just feel like... it's not a bad thing to want to go out and have fun."

"You like going to stupid bonfires with Luna?"

"I like hanging out with Luna," Lexa explained. "She's not a bad friend. And it's not like I go out and get wasted and stuff. It's slightly out of my comfort zone, yeah, but it feels kind of cool to be surrounded by all of the excitement. "Speaking of, Luna, by the way. She told me that you went out to a party with her last year."

Anya's face darkened. "I don't want to talk about that."

"Why didn't you ever talk about it? You act like hanging out with Luna is like catching the plague," Lexa said quietly, aware that her friend must have some serious qualms about what happened the night she went out.

"I don't remember it, Lexa," Anya hissed, before sighing and leaning against one of the trees. "I got so drunk that I don't remember it. I woke up in Luna's car without a shirt on. Found it by the lake, crumpled up and covered with mud. Neither of us know what happened that night. It makes me feel sick when I think about it."

"Luna must remember some of it. She said you had fun."

"I probably did, while I was plastered."

"Going out to a party doesn't have to end that way though, you know?"

"Obviously."

"So why are you so averse to hanging out with Luna again? Or me hanging out with Luna? I'm perfectly responsible, you know," Lexa said surely, a smile on her face as Anya let out a light chuckle.

"I told Lincoln about it," she admitted, "and... well, I don't really want to talk about it. He basically gave me a lot of life advice, and I just kind of decided to stay away from all of that stuff."

"He told you to do that?"

"No. But based on what he said, I decided," Anya repeated, shaking her head. "It's hard to explain, Lexa. But that's why it's been hard for me to watch you go out and act like you have to be someone else to be someone."

"Well... that might be why I started it all," Lexa said quietly, "but I received my some life advice from someone as well, and I've just... realized how stupid it was. But I don't want to go back to being that one dimensional person that I never truly was."

"I don't want you to either," Anya admitted. "Maybe I'll go out with you and Luna next time."

Lexa smiled softly at her friend. She was glad that they could talk through this all, because she'd felt her friendship with Anya straining lately, and her best friend was too important to her to let something like that happen. Suddenly, her thoughts drifted to another person that she probably needed to talk to – someone that she needed to apologize to, actually.

"What are you thinking about?" Anya asked, confusion shining in her dark eyes.

Lexa shook her head. "I have to... go. I need to go talk to someone."

"Wait, who? Luna?"

"No," Lexa answered, before hesitating and remembering what she'd told Luna that her best friend still didn't know about her. "I'll... tell you about it later. I really have to go." And with that, Lexa was hurrying back across the field and to the school parking lot for her car.

Clarke tucked her phone in between her shoulder and her ear as she made a cup of coffee for someone. The customer was looking at her quite distastefully, but Finn had called her about six times in the last five minutes, and that was somewhat alarming. "What the fuck, Finn? I'm working!"

"You and I need to talk sometime soon. I had classes this morning, or else I would've come to you before, but we really need to talk," he insisted.

"You couldn't have just texted me that?" Clarke demanded. "And what the fuck do we need to talk about?"

"Same thing as last week."

"What did we talk about last week?" Clarke asked, aware that she should probably remember. It wasn't her fault that she was distracted by work.

She put a lid on the cup of coffee and handed it to the customer as Finn began to talk again. "Lexa."

"What about her?" Clarke demanded. She was trying her best to not think about the younger brunette. Lexa had run out after kissing her, which had left Clarke to talk to Bellamy, who clearly disapproved of anything happening there. Not to mention, Lexa hadn't texted her or anything since then, and Clarke thought it might be best that she didn't text at all either.

It was slightly painful, though, as well as hurtful, that there was no texting going on. She couldn't help that she liked Lexa, which she'd definitely stopped denying by now. She'd also tried to tell herself, however, that Lexa was probably just confusing excitement of doing something different with actual feelings.

She knew it was bullshit, though, because of Lexa's pretty downright convincing confession that had taken place very shortly before the kiss. Then again, it might be that whole emotional conversation that had just made Lexa feel like kissing her. It didn't necessarily mean that she was genuinely interested in her.

The way you're interested in her, Clarke's mind told herself, before she shook her head and tried to focus on what Finn was now saying.

"About the fact that there's something going on between you and her," Finn stated. "Look, we'll talk about it when you're off. Can you come by the warehouse tonight? I'll be here until pretty late. No early classes tomorrow."

"Maybe," Clarke said, huffing in annoyance, "but I do have early classes tomorrow morning, in case you forgot."

"Just for a few minutes, Clarke," Finn insisted.

"Yeah. See you later," Clarke said, hanging up the phone and pocketing it. Just as she did, her blue eyes fell on the sight of a certain brunette entering The Bean. Green eyes immediately met hers, and for a second, Lexa looked relieved. Then, she looked tense again. Clarke didn't know how to feel.

She knew that her heart was suddenly beating faster, and their kiss was replaying in her mind, but there was no way that that was what she wassupposed to be feeling. Lexa came up to the counter and asked, "It's not busy much on Monday nights?"

"Are you surprised?" Clarke deadpanned.

"No."

"Alright. Black coffee?"

Lexa shook her head. "I came here to apologize to you."

"You know, there's this thing called a phone..."

"Clarke," Lexa interrupted her, and if it was anyone else, the blonde would've glared the hell out of her. But it wasn't anyone else, it was Lexa, and Clarke found her mouth snapping shut. "I shouldn't have... I shouldn't have kissed you. It was stupid, and I'm sorry. And I thought about everything you said, and you were right about the whole... trying to be someone else, and how I shouldn't do that."

Clarke knew that this was when she was supposed to speak, but she couldn't. She just stared at Lexa, unsure of how this apology made her feel.

"But I want you to know that I haven't... been pretending around you. I spent a lot of summer trying to be someone else, but I think it mostly just made me realize who I actually am, and who I want to be. And I'm sorry for kissing you, but I wasn't... pretending. And I know that you must be pissed off at me. You just... I mean, I just... felt like you were sending me a lot of mixed signals. Because you got mad at me for trying to get with Finn, which is super understandable, and then you gave me your number, a-and I think you kissed me back, and I just didn't understand –"

"I gave you my number," Clarke interrupted suddenly, surprised at herself, "because I wanted you to have my number. And I kissed you back, because I wanted to kiss you."

Lexa blinked. "Oh."

"And then I didn't text you, because it's probably a really bad idea to be kissing you."

Lexa nodded, and neither of them spoke again for a moment. "Um. When do you get off?"

"Soon, I've been working all day. But I have to go to the warehouse to talk to Finn when I do, so if you want to say something, say it now," Clarke stated.

"Talk to Finn about what?" Lexa asked, looking suddenly very concerned.

"You, apparently."

Lexa bit down on her lower lip, but she looked very nervous all of the sudden. "Oh."

"Should I be worried?" Many thoughts were crossing Clarke's mind now, but Lexa was furiously shaking her head.

"Me and my friend Luna went out to the lake last night, and Finn saw me there. He thought... he thought that I was trying to hook up with older guys again. Well, first he demanded to know whether something was going on between you and me, and then he told me that I'm apparently trying to charm you into something, and that I'm going to fuck you over. So, I assume that whatever it is that he wants to talk to you about follows that sort of idea," Lexa answered, her voice quieting at the end of her spiel.

"Ah, I see," Clarke said. Her own voice was pretty soft as well, and she understood how everyone could tell that she liked Lexa. She was softer around the girl.

"But I wasn't. Um, trying to hook up with anyone," Lexa clarified.

Clarke felt a smile come to her face. "Can't say I'm surprised." Lexa's entire body visibly relaxed as soon as Clarke let herself do so. Was she that obvious with how she was feeling?

Lexa averted her gaze for a moment, though, and then murmured, "But yeah, this... is probably a bad idea. I mean, not this. There's not a this, obviously, but I mean. Kissing you. It was stupid. I shouldn't have done it. You're right, it's probably a really bad idea." The dejected look in Lexa's usually bright green eyes left Clarke feeling pained.

"It probably is," Clarke agreed, planning on ending the discussion off there, but despite everything, she continued, "but... what if it's not?"

Lexa looked up again with wide eyes. "What?"

"Kissing isn't illegal, you know?"

"Clarke," Lexa protested, "all of your friends hate me. My best friend doesn't even know that I'm interested in women, let alone one that's over three years older than me. And I... there's no way that I could make you happy, Clarke."

"You don't know me well enough to know what makes me happy, Lexa," Clarke argued.

"So..." Lexa glanced away from the blonde for a moment, and then back at her. "Should we just... continue to get to know each other then? Maybe then I'll know what makes you happy at some point."

Clarke felt a smile come to her face, and she nodded. "I think that sounds like a good idea." A barista suddenly entered into The Bean, and Clarke breathed out a sigh of relief. She'd been working all day.

For a reason unknown to Clarke, Lexa waited for her to gather her things and start to leave the building before beginning to leave as well. "Are you still going to go talk to Finn?"

"I told him I would," Clarke answered. "It'll be fine, though. At least I know what to expect."

Lexa nodded, stopping as she realized that Clarke's car was parked right by the coffee shop. "So... I'll... text you?"

"If you're unsure," Clarke teased, "I'll be sure to text you." Lexa flushed, and the blonde couldn't resist leaning forward a bit and pressing a soft kiss to the corner of Lexa's lips. She'd been quite content to leave it there, but the brunette turned her head, once again initiating real kiss. Clarke reciprocated for a moment, before realizing where they were and pulling away. No one was around, though, and she figured that was because it was a late Monday afternoon.

"Bye," Lexa said softly, and Clarke responded with a smile before stepping away and into her car.

At the warehouse, Clarke saw only Finn's truck and steeled herself before even entering the building. "Finn?" she called.

"I'm in the back!" he called back, and she figured that his door must be open if he'd heard her. She padded through the otherwise silent warehouse and made it to Finn's room quickly, finding him sitting on his couch and fiddling his thumbs. "I swear I haven't been doing this since I called you," he promised, chuckling, "just since you walked in."

"I believe you," she said, shaking her head. "What's up?"

"I saw Lexa yesterday. At the bonfire," Finn stated.

"Okay?"

"And she kissed me."

"No, she didn't."

Finn frowned. "You're right, she didn't."

"So what the fuck?"

Crossing his arms, he insisted, "I was trying to see what kind of reaction that would get from you."

"I already spoke to Lexa about what you talked to her about yesterday at the bonfire," Clarke admitted, leaning against the wall of his shop, "and I think that you should just leave her alone. You don't know her."

"No, Clarke, but I know you," Finn said, hopping up from the couch.

"Clearly not well enough."

Spinning on her heel, she began marching back through and out of the warehouse.

She didn't want to hear it.