Clarke spent Monday night wondering what the fuck she'd been thinking.

Standing in front of Lexa, thinking of abandoning all chances of them having... anything beyond friendship in between them, there hadn't been a clearer option to her than to just roll with it.

Clarke wasn't usually brave, at least she didn't feel brave. She rarely did things outside of her comfort zone – granted, her comfort zone had become rather broad in the time since she finished high school. She thought that maybe now, after talking to Lexa, she might feel brave. It was quite the opposite, though, because something else was dawning on her.

She was twenty-one, with her life only recently starting to be put together, and Lexa was seventeen, with a bright, sparkling future ahead of her. It felt selfish of her to want to try anything with the brunette, and it also felt like any and all consequences would be negative.

Clarke wanted to call Lexa now, and call take backs. She wanted to tell Lexa that she deserved better than someone who had started college years late and then only decided to get her associates degree. She wanted to tell Lexa to not forget the things she'd learned during her rebellious stage, but to not let them dominate who she was. She wanted Lexa to forget about her, finish high school, and live the life that she was meant to live.

But Clarke wouldn't be that person.

Lexa had already expressed the reasoning behind her recent antics, and Clarke wouldn't be the person who did what everyone else in Lexa's life was trying to do – tell her what it was that she wanted, what she needed, and what to do. Clarke wouldn't make a decision that would affect Lexa without talking to the younger girl first.

She just wished that the whole situation didn't feel so wrong. On top of the fact that Clarke's friends, at least the two who were suspicious about her and Lexa in the first place, felt like it was wrong, she was starting to get the idea that pursuing anything with Lexa would just hold the brunette back.

Unlike her friends, she wasn't concerned for herself right now.

It was very late that night when she managed to fall asleep, only to have to wake up a few hours later for her first class of the semester.

She forced any lingering thoughts of Lexa from her mind as she made her way to campus. She'd figure it out.

Lexa, on the other hand, had slept easily once again. She was relieved that Clarke hadn't been pissed at her for the kiss, if not slightly surprised, and also quite happy that Clarke hadn't dismissed any possibility of them having any sort of relationship. While Lexa felt the same reservation that Clarke had expressed – that it was just a bad idea – she wasn't exactly sure how bad it could be.

It was the first week of September, and Lexa's birthday was in October. She was nearly eighteen, and she liked Clarke. Clarke clearly liked her as well.

But Lexa had always been shy, and despite her tendency to peek out of her shell lately, she'd been way too scared to openly state that she didn't think that it was a bad idea when Clarke had said that it was. Rather, she'd voiced to the blonde that she agreed with her. At least that way, it would've been less embarrassing if Clarke had turned the whole idea down.

It made her feel light, and happy, how it'd worked out.

At school on Tuesday, Anya didn't question how joyful she was, or ask for an explanation as to where Lexa had gone after running off from school the previous day. Maybe she didn't really remember that Lexa had promised an explanation, and Lexa, honestly, was glad. Telling Anya that she was pretty sure that she was gay would be difficult in and of itself, but tacking on that she really liked a girl who was almost four years older than her wouldn't help.

The idea of telling anyone, at the moment, kind of scared her, though that may have come from the fact that the only people she was considering in that 'anyone' was her mom and Anya.

Luna approached her after lunch at school, knocking her elbow into the brunette's. "Did you talk to Anya?"

"About?" Lexa asked, panicked for a moment and wondering how Luna had been reading her recent thoughts.

"Going to a party with us sometime," Luna replied, raising a suspicious eyebrow.

"Oh, yeah. She said maybe," Lexa said, relieved. Her friend gave her a slightly confused look at her tone, and then realization seemed to come to her.

"Did you think I meant about your little... secret?"

Lexa rolled her eyes. "If you say it that way, it sounds weird."

"Well, you've been smiling and grinning all day like an idiot. So I'd assume that something interesting happened between you and the hot guy's friend."

"Interesting, yes."

"Good?"

"Probably," Lexa answered, aware that another smile was coming to her face. Luna snorted and shook her head.

"Better keep that smile in check if you don't want Anya to get suspicious," Luna teased. "I'll see you later." Lexa nodded, though Luna's words brought got her to frown rather than smile at all. She hated keeping things from her best friend, but it seemed to be something that she was doing a lot more lately.

Silently promising herself that she would tell Anya, at some point, she forced herself to relax and went off to class.

At the end of the school day, Lexa found herself tagging along with Anya to The Bean. They took their separate cars of course, and ended up settled in the corner of the coffee shop nursing their respective drinks as they started doing homework.

Lexa was quickly distracted, however, as a text suddenly came through her phone.

From Clarke – Hey, cutie.

To Clarke – Hey! How's your day?

From Clarke – Shit, but what else could you really expect? My last semester of classes started today.

To Clarke – At least it's your last.

From Clarke – True. How about your day?

To Clarke – It's been pretty good. :) I'm doing homework at The Bean right now, with my best friend Anya.

From Clarke – I was thinking about putting up a picture of you behind the register with a note: "If this girl shows up, just make her the most boring coffee ever because for some reason she thinks it tastes good."

Lexa felt her lips turn up into a small smile.

To Clarke – If you want a picture of me, you don't have to come up with some scheme like that, just ask ;)

The reply took a moment longer than the others had, and Lexa wondered if she'd caught the blonde off guard.

From Clarke – Hah, thanks, but I'd rather not get arrested for child pornography before I even get to graduate college. X

Lexa's jaw dropped.

To Clarke – THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT.

From Clarke – Watch where you put those winking face then, cutie ;)

"Who the fuck are you texting?" Anya asked suddenly, and Lexa jumped, having nearly forgotten that her best friend was with her. She felt her face turn bright red as she realized that she'd been smiling like an idiot throughout most of her texting conversation with Clarke.

"Um, a friend."

"A cute friend?" Anya asked, grinning.

"Maybe."

Anya raised an eyebrow. "Does your maybe cute friend have a name?"

"Nope," Lexa answered, biting down on her lower lip and allowing herself to look back back at her phone to type out a response despite Anya.

To Clarke – Oh my bad, clearly you are far wiser is the ways of winking faces.

"Okay, nameless cute friend," Anya muttered, rolling her eyes. "Where'd you meet him?"

"A place."

"Lexa," Anya whined, "come on, tell me."

Lexa felt her phone vibrate again, but she forced herself to not look down at the new text message until she'd gotten Anya's focus on something else. "I don't want to jinx it," she tried, hoping that the reasoning would help. "If I start talking about it, I'm afraid it won't work out."

Anya gave her a careful, thoughtful gaze, and then she sighed. "Okay, fine." Her gaze fell back down onto her homework, and Lexa continued to ignore the papers spread in front of her to look back at her phone.

From Clarke – Indeed, I am. Anyway. I've gotta go do some painting to try and forget college and stress and whatnot. Talk later. X

Lexa frowned at the abruptness of the goodbye, but she didn't linger on it, instead just putting down her phone and trying to focus on her homework.

A couple hours later found Lexa and Anya both in their respective homes, but Lexa didn't say there for very long. She was hyper aware of the fact that Clarke was at the warehouse, and Lexa quite liked being there with her. However, she was slightly scared that Finn might be there as well. She had forgotten to be concerned about it until she was already driving up to the warehouse, though, and was greatly relieved when she saw one car parked in front of the building. Clarke's.

Smiling softly to herself, Lexa parked her own car and clambered out. She'd noticed throughout her visits here that when anyone was at the warehouse, the large, sliding, front door remained open. She thought that it was slightly dangerous to leave it open, but it wasn't like many people came this way anyway, especially not with the intention of robbing a random, seemingly abandoned warehouse.

Lexa tried to walk lightly on her feet as she entered the building. She knew, by now, how to traverse the area fairly well. At least, she knew how to get to Clarke's room and Finn's, since it was just down the same hallway a little ways.

When she made it to the threshold between the hallway and Clarke's art room, Lexa leaned against the wall and gazed at the blonde for a moment. Music was playing, and Clarke hadn't realized that anyone was behind her. Her hair was up in a messy bun, and she was wearing short shorts and a loose t-shirt that Lexa guessed was covered in paint on the front. She was currently more staring at her painting than actually adding to it, so Lexa took it as a perfect time to interject. "Hey," she called, causing the blonde to look over her shoulder in surprise.

"Lexa," Clarke said, sounding quite caught off guard, "hey, what are you doing here?" She set down her paintbrush and went to where her computer was playing music, turning the volume down.

Lexa opened her mouth to answer, before slamming it shut again. What was she doing there? "Ah. I was bored."

Clarke smiled, rolling her eyes and making her way back to the easel. "Am I your only source of entertainment?"

"No, but you're one of my favorites," Lexa answered, her heart pounding in her chest despite the fleeting moment of bravery. Clarke hummed thoughtfully, but said nothing. She was looking at the painting in front of her, but she hadn't picked up her brush again. Lexa suddenly felt concern building up in herself, and she heard herself blurt, "Are you okay?"

"We shouldn't... do this."

Lexa's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, I was wrong, and this is a bad idea."

"Why?"

Clarke spun around, looking exasperated. "Lexa, you're seventeen."

"I turn eighteen in less than two months," Lexa argued, thinking that this argument was getting weaker and weaker. All her age meant was that she and Clarke couldn't have sex. And since she wasn't planning on telling her mom anything until she was over eighteen – for various reasons – there wasn't really any legal issue.

"It's not about that, Lexa," Clarke insisted, sounding as though this conversation pained her. "It's about the fact that you have such a good life ahead of you, and being with me at all, in whatever way, is going to hold you back. And you're going to resent me someday if I let that happen."

"If you let that happen?" Lexa demanded, crossing her arms. "Clarke, it's not like you're the only one in this. I'm here too."

"I can't hold you back, Lexa. I won't let myself do that to you."

"You won't. I know what I want out of my life – to some extent – and I wouldn't ever choose to do something that I thought would throw my whole future up to chance. And last I checked, dating you wouldn't do that," Lexa insisted. "Look, Clarke, I get why you think this is a bad idea. There are probably a lot of reasons, actually, but that is not one of them. I haven't known you for very long, but I really like you, and I'm not letting you toss that aside like it doesn't matter because you think that you're somehow holding me back."

Lexa dared a huge step forward, and Clarke looked surprised, her eyes wide.

"Now, if you want to tell me that dating me is a bad idea because your friends really wouldn't like it, or because my being a minor actually really bothers you even though I'm almost eighteen, that's fine, and I'll leave you alone," Lexa breathed out. "Or if you want to say that it's a bad idea because you don't think you like me enough to risk anything... I'll accept that and walk away."

She took another step forward, and she was surprised at how the roles had changed. She'd been intimidated by Clarke a few weeks ago, but now, the blonde was was looking at her with wide eyes. She wasn't quite fearful, which was obviously a good thing, and it was probably mostly surprise shining out of her bright blue eyes. But Lexa thought she looked like she felt smaller all of the sudden.

Lexa definitely felt far more courageous than she ever had, fighting against her fast beating heart and her nerves. She searched Clarke's eyes, waiting for the response. Her nerves began to become a bit more prominent, and she tried her best to swallow them down. The action seemed to break Clarke's attention away from her eyes, and suddenly, blue eyes were gazing at her lips.

Lexa unconsciously wet them, and Clarke made eye contact with her once again for a split second, before taking a step and meeting Lexa's lips with her own. Their lips moved together in sync, both wanting and needing the kiss. Clarke's body leaned into Lexa's a little bit, and the brunette did her best to not let the feeling distract her from the kiss, which was as far as anything could go anyway.

The contact broke slightly for a moment, and Clarke murmured, "Fine, you fucking stubborn teenager."

Lexa grinned, giggling a little bit as Clarke brought their lips back together.