Clara parked her station wagon beside Chibs' motorcycle grimacing as she pulled into the parking place. She had always hated parking in tight spaces. And parking in the dark was even worse.
She couldn't help but to picture herself somehow wrecking into the car in front of her or even worse slamming into Chibs' Dyna.
She'd been raised around enough bikers to know that they had often had a certain type of relationship with their bikes. They treated their motorcycles like they were their babies.
She tried to hide the way her cheeks grew a little rosy as Chibs took one of the plastic grocery bags full of leftover junk food from her, his hand brushing against hers.
She couldn't help but wonder how it would feel to hold Chibs' hand in hers. Thank heavens people couldn't read minds she thought to herself.
She followed Chibs off towards the apartments allowing him to type in the entrance code at the gate to enter the complex. She smiled as he held the gate open for her allowing her to enter first.
Even bikers could be gentlemen sometimes, she thought to herself.
She didn't speak until they rounded the corner nearing their apartments. "So you had a good time tonight right? I mean I know it was probably a little lame...you know listening to me and Juice argue about zombies and geek stuff. I guess I'm a little bit of science fiction junkie. I mean not that that's bad...You know it's not like I'm running around in a Princess Leia costume or Spock ears. So I'm not a total weirdo...not that there's anything wrong with that...I mean my bff's brother loves comics conventions. He rocks a Batman costume."
She felt her cheeks grow even darker as she realized she was babbling like a total idiot. She couldn't help but to think that Chibs must think she was a gigantic dork with a serious case of verbal diarrhea.
She'd always been told that men didn't like geeky chicks. Or at least that was what she'd learned from most of the men she'd dated.
Her ex fiancée Mitch wouldn't know a comic book if someone walked up to him and slapped him right in the face with one.
Mitch was always telling her that comics and science fiction were childish. She could remember his favorite statement of all to tell her: No offense but that's for social lepers who live in their mother's basement babe.
Clara had begrudgingly accepted that statement. She'd hidden her love of the geekier things in life in fear that Mitch was right.
It was nice to be able to sort of begin to enjoy those things once again.
She let out a relieved sigh, as Chibs chuckled thankfully not deterred by her babbling. "I had a blast lass. It was actually kinda fun watchin ya outsmart Juice. He's always been a sore loser. He's pretty smug when he wants ta be."
He paused for a moment smirking at her rambling about comics and all things geek. " I didn't take ya fer a Star Wars junkie."
"Yeah guilty...I mean everyone loves Star Wars just a little bit I think...I kind of love comics too. I loved Wonder Woman when I was a kid. I was raised on that stuff. Bobby used to take me to the Comic Shop over near Floyds Barber Shop. He'd send me in with like ten bucks and leave me there while he got his hair trimmed, which is kind of strange. He's never had short hair...I kind of think he was selling pot to Floyd...but don't tell anyone I said that." Clara admitted bowing her head embarrassed by the last part of her statement.
She always had the feeling that she blurted out the wrong things to the wrong people. She developed a habit of talking way too much when she was anxious about something.
It seemed that Chibs had that effect on her. She felt so jittery when she was around him. It wasn't an entirely horrible feeling. It was sort of thrilling to feel this way about someone again.
She was just afraid of somehow making an idiot out of herself in front of him. The last thing she wanted Chibs to think was that she was some ditzy immature woman.
She hadn't felt this nervous around a guy since she was a teenager. She couldn't help but to sigh as she realized that she'd felt exactly this way about Chibs when she was a teenager. She guessed it made sense that this feeling had returned to her now.
She cleared her throat as she spoke again changing the subject away from her uncle's pot supply and what he may or may not be doing with it. "I love comic art though. I always have.. The designs make me think of my childhood. I used to make shirts using vintage comics. I'd trace the comics and use an X acto knife to cut a stencil with the design. Then I'd use screen-printing and ink over white shirts. My best friend Victoria and I wanted to start an online shop and sell them. It didn't work out though...copyright issues kind of screwed it up."
"Ya should do it still...I mean maybe ya can find someone who draws that way ya will have yer own art." Chibs replied genuinely impressed by the idea.
He admired her creative side. He knew that he sure as hell never would of come up with something like that.
"You think so? I guess I need to look for artists...I never could draw worth a crap. That was why I always traced the designs. It's amazing that I can even manage to draw out patterns without screwing up." She stated wondering where she could find an artist in Charming that would be willing to work with her.
It would be a good business venture. She could do this shirt thing online and still make money working at the garage.
She liked the idea of making a little extra cash. More cash would make it a hell of a lot easier to pay back her uncle.
She spoke again as Chibs and she stopped at her front door. "I'm happy you had fun. I did too. I don't think I've had that much fun in a long time. I'd love to hang out again like that."
"So would I." Chibs admitted as he stood in front of her. He stared down at her unable to tear his eyes away from her.
It was just like he was dropping her off after a date, he thought to himself. Dropping her off at her door; secretly hoping for a kiss.
He scolded himself a little for that last thought. If Clara could somehow magically read minds he'd be screwed.
Clara stared up at him not helping but to enjoy standing like this so close to one another. It felt so intimate. It was nice staring up at him, looking into his dark eyes.
She'd always loved his eyes. They were so expressive. When he was cheerful they were a deep almost mocha brown. When he was pissed or sick or just feeling down his eyes took on a deep shade of dirt like brown. They would turn almost a black.
He stared down at her as he handed over the grocery bag of chips and boxed microwave popcorn that was left over from their night at Juice's house.
He loved the way she was looking at him; chocolate brown eyes peeking through her long dark lashes. He didn't have any time to think as he reached out tucking a few of her dark locks of hair behind her ear. His touch was so soft that it almost tickled her skin.
She felt the tip of her tongue peek out moistening her lips. She let her bottom lip drag lightly along her teeth as she felt her eyes lock down on Chibs' lips.
She had to wonder how his lips would feel against her own. His lips were so chapped from the ride over but she felt like they'd still feel amazing against her lips.
She imagined that he knew how to sweep a girl of her feet with those lips in more ways than one; given all the croweaters he'd been with. A man who'd slept with that many women was probably an amazing lover.
Chibs stared down at her lips letting out a heavy breath as he watched her. He found it somewhat erotic watching her teeth tug at her rosy bottom lip.
Her lips looked so smooth and so plump. He imagined that they'd feel so soft against his own. He couldn't help but to imagine those lips ghosting over every inch of his body; leaving soft rose-tinted lipstick prints in their wake.
They leaned in closer to one another their lips coming so close to colliding until they were interrupted by a familiar chirping noise.
Reality had unfortunately found a way to burst through the little bubble they'd been so happily locked in.
Chibs let out a heavy groan at the sound of his prepay cell. He had a text message.
He reluctantly pulled away from her as he reached into the leather pocket of his kutte fishing out his flip phone. Only a brother would be texting him at this hour.
A part of him couldn't help but to fear that it was Juice texting him to complain that he was cockblocking him when it came to Clara.
Clara stared down at the concrete sidewalk below her as she silently cursed that damn cell phone.
That incredible moment they'd been locked in had been interrupted and there was probably no way of getting it back. Clara knew they'd lost whatever they had just been experiencing.
Chibs let out an exasperated huff as he read the text message. It was from Tig.
The man was obviously drunk given all the misspellings and abnormal spaces. The text was a big barely legible mess. From what he could make out it was something about the strip club the Jelly Bean Lounge, two strippers named Kandy with a K and Starla, and a bucket of chocolate pudding.
Most of SAMCRO avoided the Jelly Bean Lounge. The place could barely pass as a strip club. The strippers weren't pretty to look at and most of the time they were dazed out on pills or something way more intense. Tig loved it though.
Chibs shoved his cell phone back down into his pocket cursing his drunken pervert of a brother and the man's shitty timing.
He looked back at Clara knowing that the moment had been ruined. He knew he'd lost whatever nerve he'd had.
Clara cleared her throat as she nodded down at where he'd shoved his cell phone. "Club business?
"Somethin like that." Chibs remarked deciding to just lie. He didn't want to repeat Tig's drunken skeevy message.
Clara gave him a small smile cursing herself for not having the guts to just kiss him like she so badly wanted to. "I guess I'll see you at work Tuesday. I'm actually off Monday. I think I'm going to spend Monday looking around town...seeing if anything has changed since I've been gone."
"Aye sounds fun. I'll see ya Tuesday." He replied letting out a huff as she walked into her apartment shutting the door behind her.
He pressed his head to the thick red wooden door as he let out a heavy sigh, so frustrated with himself and his lack of a backbone.
How was it he could be the steel nerved Son he was, but when it came to kissing a pretty woman that he couldn't help but to be crazy about his nerves went to shit.
He knew what it was of course. Clara was something special.
She wasn't just some sweetbutt that he could just turn on the charm with knowing that there was nothing there but getting his dick wet.
He felt guilt stir in his gut as he realized that there was still a possibility that Clara was involved with Juice. He knew that he'd really fuck everything up if he kissed her. He couldn't kiss a brother's old lady.
He pulled away reluctantly heading to his own apartment. He needed a drink.
Chibs was going to kill Tig next time he saw him.
Clara sat back on her sofa her cell phone held up to her ear. She had spent all day driving around Charming seeing if her favorite shops and eateries were still in business.
She wasn't shocked to see that they were all in fact this in business.
She had gotten a small waffle cone of her favorite bubble gum ice cream from Murphy's Old Fashioned Ice Cream Parlor. She usually didn't allow herself to have too many sugary treats, but the ice cream had always been her absolute favorite. She hadn't found anything that even came close to it.
She had gone to her favorite fabric store Charming Hobby Center and had looked at fabrics wishing that she had the spending money to afford to buy a few yards of the gorgeous eggplant colored cotton fabric. She knew that it would make an amazing dress.
And lastly she had gone to the Charming Pet Shop and had looked at the puppies up for adoption. She'd spent a lot of time there checking each of them out contemplating rather she should just buy one or not.
She was debating the idea of getting a dog. She knew it would have to be a small dog of course. The apartment had a weight limit on the size of dog a tenant could own.
She knew that she probably didn't have the money for a pet right this second. But she missed all the joys of owning a dog.
Clara had owned a dog in Vegas with Mitch for a short while. It had been a red longhaired dachshund that she had named Winnie. Winnie apparently could sense that Mitch was a douchebag long before Clara did.
The little dog had somehow found a way even with her little short legs to pee in Mitch's expensive new Nike sneakers. Winnie had chewed up his leather date book. She'd shredded one of his financial magazines. And she'd peed in his closet.
Mitch had made Clara give Winnie away to a no kill shelter. Clara had unwillingly done it when Mitch had told her that it was either the dog or him.
Clara missed the little dog so much. The dog had followed her all over the condo everywhere. She'd slept on Mitch's side of the bed when Mitch would leave for business trips.
Clara missed Winnie even more now when she thought about how much Winnie had hated Mitch.
The day wasn't even over yet but she was exhausted. She'd changed into a pair of yoga pants and had done her nails while watching The Wizard of Oz on Netflix on her laptop.
Clara examined her freshly silver painted nails as she listened to Victoria ramble on and on about the new cute waiter at her dad's Korean Barbecue place.
Clara had zoned out honestly. Her mind was still locked on the night before.
Once she'd entered her apartment It had taken every single ounce of willpower in her body to resist running over to Chibs' apartment knocking on his door and locking her lips with his the second he opened the door.
Fear stopped her from being so brave. She was frightened that Chibs didn't feel the same way about her as she felt about him.
She knew that he was sweet to her and he did flirt. He treated most women that way though from what she could see.
Chibs was the kind of man who treated every girl rather she was a croweater or just a random customer at the Auto shop, like she was a lass after his own heart.
Clara feared that she wasn't as special in Chibs' eyes as she assumed she was.
She was frightened that Chibs saw her as just a friend. She feared that he only saw her as Bobby's niece. Maybe he just saw her still as the little teenager with a crush. He still saw the woman who had come to visit him all those years ago with a fucked up snob of a fiancée. And now he saw the woman who was looking for a fresh start in her hometown.
Who was to say she was even ready for a man in her life again.
After Mitch had betrayed her she had decided that it was just best to box away her heart.
Clara had decided that love and men just hurt you. They screwed you over and left you to clean up the damage.
She had built up a wall around her fragile heart. She had refused to give anyone the chance to prove her wrong about how she felt about men.
Being around Chibs again had somehow started to put cracks in that wall.
Yes she was still so afraid of getting hurt once again, but she had a difficult time truly believing that Chibs would hurt her.
After that first summer she'd spent in Charming Chibs and she had become friends.
Chibs had called her to check up on her from time to time and she'd sent him birthday cards. When Chibs had gotten a laptop they'd started emailing one another.
Chibs had always been there for her up until her relationship with Mitch had become serious.
Her relationship with Mitch had interrupted her friendship with Chibs. Clara did feel guilty about that fact. She'd lost contact with a dear friend because of Mitch's insecurites about her being friends with a male. She'd traded a great friendship for a douche of a fiancee.
Chibs had been a great friend to her. Chibs had been there to give her advice or a pep talk when she was nervous about an exam or some other probably trivial matter.
He always remembered to call her on her birthday. He sent her cards at Hannuka and Christmas because he knew she'd grown up celebrating both.
Chibs was someone special.
He'd been so good to her, and she feared somehow fucking it all up.
She tore her eyes away from her nails as she heard Victoria groan. "Aren't you listening to me?"
"Hmmm." Clara remarked the words in her mouth all rushing to come out at once and somehow jamming up in her throat.
"I knew it." Victoria remarked an irritated tone to her voice.
Clara cleared her throat feeling ashamed for her daydreaming. "Sorry. What did you say?"
"I asked if you'd met anyone? You need to start dating again Clara. When you fall of the horse you get back on." Victoria stated a slightly maternal tone to her voice.
Clara rolled her eyes as she stared at her crappy box television. "I feel like I fell of a bull."
She heard Victoria giggle as the woman spoke. "All the more reason to get back on my dear."
Victoria didn't even give Clara the chance to respond as she spoke again. "So have you met anyone worthy of dating...or you know worthy of a one night stand. I know you haven't been laid since Mitch."
Clara felt her cheeks flush wondering if it was that obvious. "I don't do one night stands...I mean STDs are so prevalent in our generation. Did you know there's like a crazy strain of gonorrhea that you can't even treat now?"
"Don't start that." Victoria groaned refusing to even get into that conversation.
"What?" Clara asked her cheeks still flushed over the comment about her sex life or lack there of.
Victoria sighed as she spoke up. "That thing where you change the subject by mentioning something disgusting or horrible in hopes that I'll just drop the conversation."
Clara rolled her eyes hating that her bff knew her so well. She shook her head as she heard Victoria cough. The woman was probably attempting to smoke in the bathroom stall at work again.
Victoria spoke trying to lay in her point. "This is just like when I was trying to get you to throw out all those pictures of Mitch and you together. You started telling me about that creepy Post Mortem Photography shit. And we never finished the discussion."
"I just thought it was interesting. I mean the Victorians had such a bizarre relationship with death. Imagine if we took pictures of our dead like that now." Clara remarked not surprised as Victoria sighed again.
Clara shook her head her voice faltering, "I don't want a one night stand. I don't know if I'm ready for a relationship either. My heart hurt so much last time...It fucking hurt and I think it would kill me if I went through that again."
Victoria spoke up her voice more sympathetic. "Honey I know. Trust me I know. I saw you go throw all that pain. You can't hide from the world though. You have to give someone a chance. Trust me if they hurt you I'll make them regret it."
Clara sighed a tight smile on her face. She wished it were as simple as Victoria made it sound. "I don't know...I mean there is this guy. You remember me telling you about Chibs right?"
"The Scottish dude that's friends with your uncle? You're going for older men now? I don't blame you...I mean an older guy is going to be way more experienced in the sack." Victoria stated knowing just whom Clara was referring to.
Clara had mentioned the man more than once or twice. Victoria had always sensed something in Clara's voice when she mentioned Chibs, but Victoria had never thought to push the issue.
"Yeah he's my friend too. His age doesn't bother me. He's...well he's amazing. He's sweet and funny and just so...I don't know strong and just everything I want. I feel like there's something there between us. I just don't know though. It scares me. What if he doesn't want me?" Clara admitted finding it strange to be saying these words out loud.
Victoria was quick to speak up doing her best to reassure Clara. "If he doesn't want you he's a giant idiot. Like the biggest idiot on the planet...Like Jessica Simpson or Paris Hilton dumb."
Clara laughed knowing that only Victoria could make her feel better using her knowledge of trashy celebrity gossip and pop culture.
She shook her head as she spoke again. "We almost kissed last night...I think. I don't know I felt like it was about to happen. Our lips got so close and it was so...perfect. His cell phone beeped though and the moment died. I don't know where to go from here."
Victoria spoke giving Clara a peice of seemingly obvious advice. "You're going to go to that Auto Shop you two work at. You're going to get all fixed up and go see him. You're going to ask him out on a date."
"What would I say?" Clara replied not hiding the panic in her voice. The idea of doing that made her throat tighten and her voice rise an octave.
"You're going to walk up to him smile and say Would you like to come to my place tomorrow night for dinner just me and you. You can make that Tuscon Chicken that you make all the time. Have some wine, turn on some music, and flirt. He'll fall right into your hands. And if he says no to the date or screws it all up then fuck him. Move on and find someone who deserves you." Victoria explained ignoring Clara's little panic attack.
Clara twisted her lips her anxiety attack turning into doubt. "It's not that easy."
"Of course it is. You like him. You want to be with him. You said he makes you laugh. He's sweet to you. You think he's amazing. Why wouldn't it be simple?" Victoria replied.
Clara closed her eyes feeling defeat set in. Victoria was right.
It really was simple. Clara just had to get the brazenness to go through with Victoria's plan.
Chibs' head was still spinning from the night before. How would have things turned out if he'd kissed her?
He had almost convinced himself that Clara would wind up regretting the kiss. He told himself that she probably wouldn't want to ruin their friendship.
It probably would have been a gigantic mistake to kiss her he tried to tell himself. It would only end in a disaster.
Chibs tried to tell himself that he wasn't good enough for Clara. She deserved so much more than an aging biker with an estranged wife and a screwed up past.
She deserved the best and Chibs knew that he couldn't always give her the best.
She deserved more.
He looked up from the exhaust filter in the Harley he had been slaving over for about an hour now as he noticed Juice pull his bike into the parking lot.
Juice usually wouldn't catch Chibs' attention, but today was different. The redheaded buxom bombshell riding on the back of Juice's bike made everything different.
Chibs recognized the croweater. She was a new girl who had rolled in with some brother named Weasel from San Bernardino. She went by the name Berry due to her unnaturally more than likely dyed bright red hair. The nickname also referred to the two red strawberries tattooed over each ample breast.
Chibs felt his hand tighten down on the wrench he was holding as Juice unmounted the bike along with Berry.
Chibs watched as Juice held the giggling crimson haired croweater close to him pressing a few kisses to her neck his hand grasping onto her bottom.
The croweater pouted her pink lip glossed lips as Juice started to pull away. She managed to lean in whispering something into Juice's ear before pulling away herself. She gave him a flirty little wave before she skipped off to the clubhouse being sure to shake her bottom purposely as she moved.
Juice shook his head chuckling to himself as he watched the redhead walk away. He so obviously admired her backside in the tight ripped blue jeans she was wearing.
Juice made his way over to the garage completely oblivious to Chibs' watchful gaze. He slipped on his work shirt after removing his kutte draping it over his tool box.
The two men stood at opposite ends of the garage. It was late in the day and most of the guys had already scampered off to the clubhouse.
Chibs couldn't resist himself as he spoke up a judgmental tone to his voice. "Clara doesn't mind ya rubbin up on Berry?"
Juice raised an eyebrow spotting the angry tone to Chibs' voice. "I don't think it's going to be a problem."
Chibs placed the heavy socket wrench down knowing that if he didn't get it out of his grasp he'd wind up hurting Juice with it. He spoke up his voice tense. "Clara is a special lass Juice. She's not some gash that ya can treat like shite. She deserves someone who's goin ta treat er like a queen."
Juice shook his head wondering what Chibs had meant by that. "What are you talking about man? Why would Clara care about a croweater?"
Chibs narrowed his eyes his fists clinching. How could Juice be such an asshole about this? "Clara's yer old lady aint she?"
Juice tilted his head to the side his brow furrowing. "Since when? I mean I asked her out, but...But I think she's into someone else man. I mean don't get me wrong I still think Clara's a cool chick and all. She's got some cool interests and knows a lot about comics for a girl. It's cool that a hot girl is into that kind of stuff. We're going to try being friends."
Chibs released a breath he wasn't even aware he was holding relief shooting through him. That relief only lasted a moment as he began to mull over just how this mystery crush of Clara's was. "Who do ya think it is?"
Juice sighed unable to believe that Chibs could be so blind. "I think you know him pretty well."
Chibs frowned letting out a groan as his mind went straight to one man. It was Half Sack wasn't it. Christ Clara was smitten with the damn one nutted prospect. She was going to become the prospects old lady and have babies with the one nut wonder.
"Half sack. Christ." Chibs grumbled his heart aching. The prospect was a worse choice than Juice in Chibs' eyes.
Juice shook his head his eyes widening in shock. Chibs was way more in the dark than Juice had guessed. He spoke up giving into the desire to set shit straight. "It's you brother. I noticed it last night. She looks at you like the sunshine shines out your ass."
Chibs felt his heart began to pound at the realization. Juice wasn't right, was he?
Clara wouldn't want a disaster like him, Chibs told himself. He wasn't good enough for her. He couldn't give her a happy life free of danger and heartache. She deserved more than him.
"I aint righ fer her." Chibs remarked as he stared down at the Harley in front of him. He hated having to say it out out.
Juice let out an exasperated sigh knowing that he was going to have to intervene. He wasn't going put up with a mopey brother. Chibs got bitchy when he was in a bad mood.
"If you weren't right for her then you wouldn't have gotten so bent out of shape over the idea of me cheating on her. You said it yourself man. She's special." Juice replied deciding that was all he was going to say about this.
Hopefully he'd done enough to push things along correctly. He knew that he cared about Chibs enough to want to see the man happy.
Chibs had always been there for Juice and Juice had appreciated the friendship.
Chibs widened his eyes realizing that Juice had a point.
Now he just had to figure out what to do with this knowledge.
The two men didn't have the time to continue the conversation as a familiar blonde wondered into the garage a flirty smile appearing on her face as she spotted Chibs.
"Hey hon long time no see." She stated her voice having a certin sultry tone to it as she made her way over towards Chibs.
Chibs let out a sigh as Emily Duncan sauntered over to him her hand running up his arm and resting on his shoulder.
He'd been hitting it with Emily for a long while. The thin blonde had always been one of his favorites. She rode him out so perfectly.
She was popular among most of the sons given her willingness to please. She had a serious thing for a man in a kutte.
Chibs knew of course that she didn't see past his kutte. None of the croweaters did.
"Hey darlin." Chibs remarked as he turned his attention back to the Harley. He hoped that if he ignored her she'd take the hint.
"It's been a while. I went to visit my folks down in Arizona. I wound up staying for a few months. I missed the clubhouse though." Emily remarked leaning in closer to Chibs.
"Who wouldn't." Juice piped up sensing Chibs' discomfort about this situation.
Emily ignored Juice as she pressed her lips to Chibs' neck her voice not even bothering to lower as she reached his ear. "What do you say we go back to the clubhouse and try that thing you like Chibsy? You know the thing were you pour Jameson over my back while you take me from behind."
Chibs began to pull away fully ready to tell Emily to forget about it but he didn't have the chance as he heard a familiar voice. "Oh...wow...umm sorry I...I uh forgot something in the office. I didn't see Gemma...and I was wondering if you had key."
Chibs felt his stomach drop as he spotted Clara.
She looked so perfect. So perfect and so completely heartbroken.
Chibs knew just who was responsible for the look of discomfort on her face. Her smile had fallen and her eyes were shifted to the floor not wanting to even try to looka at Emily Duncan.
Chibs knew that he had ruined anything between Clara and he before he even had a chance to start up anything.
Clara had taken Victoria's advice after mulling over it for an hour. She'd given herself a little pep talk after she'd gotten off the phone. She had gone straight to her bedroom and had put some serious effort into looking amazing.
She was wearing a bright blue dress that hugged her curves so perfectly. She'd worn a pair of navy peep toe heels that she loved because the peep toe was shaped like a heart. Her hair had been curled in what Victoria had always called the Marilyn given that it had the same retro waves that Marilyn Monroe had worn. She'd put on some crimson lipstick and had even managed to give herself a decent cateye with some eyeliner.
It had been all for nothing. Clara felt like such a giant idiot.
She'd put so much work into her appearance trying to look sexy. She'd worked up the confidence to make a move. She'd even worked out a dialogue in her head about what she was going to say.
She'd begun to even plan a menu in her head. She'd planned on trying to make a romantic dinner. She'd planned to go out tomorrow after work and find a good bottle of white wine and some good cuts of steak. Every guy loved steak right?
She'd come so ready to throw herself at Chibs and had arrived to find a blonde croweater in short shorts, a halter top, and high heels hanging on him.
Clara had felt as though someone had staked her heart as she heard the croweater talk about Jameson Whiskey and how Chibs liked to take her from behind. Even the nickname hurt Chibsy.
All Clara could picture was Chibs and the blonde nude and wrapped up in each other.
Clara pictured Chibs giving the croweater the same smiles he gave to her. She pictured him calling the blonde lass and flirting with her.
She pictured the stupid croweater getting to find out how it felt to hold Chibs' hand and how it felt to press her lips to him.
The croweater was getting everything Clara wanted. It wasn't fair.
Clara felt even dumber when she'd realized how stupid her excuse for walking into the garage sounded.
She was obviously too dressed up to be just stopping by TM Auto to pick up a supposed left behind item.
After what happened between them last night there was only one reason for Clara to show up dressed like she was.
Juice stood back his eyes wide. He was torn between wanting to just stick back and watch this trainwreck or wanting to try being a friend to Clara. After all they were supposed to be friends now.
Juice didn't like how heartbroken Clara looked. He wanted to do or say something to make her smile.
He hadn't been lying to Chibs when he'd pointed out how cool he found Clara. She was into all the things he liked. Juice thought that it was kind of cool knowing a pretty girl who knew her shit when it came to horror films and comics.
Clara cleared her throat doing her best to hide the pain she felt as she spoke. "I can get it later though...I mean it's not a big deal. It's just a notebook of mine. Some jewelry designs I was doodling...I uh I better go. I'll leave you too...your thing I guess."
Chibs shoved Emily Duncan away as he made a move to follow Clara. She was moving so quickly obviously wanting to get the hell away from what she'd just walked in on.
He felt like shit. Chibs felt like the gum on the bottom of someones nice new shoes. He felt lower than low.
Here was an amazing girl who made him feel so good and he'd just screwed it all up.
Maybe he wasn't any good for her, he thought. Here they were not even dating and he'd already managed to hurt her.
He followed her out to the parking lot as she reached her station wagon. He spoke his voice frantic as he tried to stop her from jumping into her car."Clara wait up lass."
Clara bit down on the inside of her cheek refusing to cry in front of someone who so didn't deserve her tears as she turned around. "What?"
"That's not what it looked like lass...I..." Chibs blurted out not having the chance to finish his statement as Clara interrupted him.
"It's nothing. I mean...I don't care. It's not my business. I just came for my things. You can do whatever you want with whoever you want. I mean that girl seems to know just what you want. This doesn't involve me at all. You're a free dick right." Clara blurted out doing her best Gemma impersonation.
She was shocked that she was going to a woman she had such a contentions relationship with, for inspiration. Gemma was the master of being a badass though.
Clara needed that badass attitude more than ever right now.
Part of her was sure though that Gemma would have just thrown the free dick comment at him though.
Chibs felt his heart twist as he stepped forward reaching for her. "Clara..."
Clara shook her head opening the door to her car and climbing into the drivers seat. "Like I said. It's nothing. You're a free man. Go back to the sweetbutt and enjoy the Jameson."
And with that she slammed the door and started up her car pulling out of the parking lot.
Chibs watched her pull out of TM Auto on to the street leaving him feeling like someone had slapped him.
Her words had hurt. He'd almost wished that she had just slapped him instead.
He ran his hand through his hair knowing that he had really fucked this all up.
It was clear that he'd hurt her. He could see the anger and the sorrow in her eyes.
She was giving him this ambivalent bullshit about how it wasn't a big deal. It so clearly was though.
Clara probably hated his guts now. He had no idea how to even begin to fix any of this.
What was he going to do now?
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Chapter Song Title - Say Hello, Wave Goodbye - By Soft Cell