So we finally get to see a little more Leo coming out in this chapter. After all, would you expect anything less when his family is threatened? You'll also get more just a little more of the story about the day Leo disappeared, and we get some Mikey-Leo fluff. Who doesn't enjoy that?
It took time, but with Raphael's steady support bolstering him, Shadow was able to begin shedding the enslaved mindset beaten into him by years of abuse. Of course, the other turtles played their parts in the process as well. If Donatello was helping to free his mind from the shackles of enforced ignorance, and Raphael was responsible for helping Shadow learn he was worthy of receiving love and affection, then Michelangelo was teaching him how to give it.
Ever since learning about just how horrific Shadow's past life had been, the youngest turtle had been sticking close. At first, Shadow thought Michelangelo was doing so for his, Shadow's, benefit, until Raphael mentioned one evening it had been a long time since he'd seen his baby brother that at ease.
"He doesn't talk about it, and he's gotten really good at hiding it, but Michelangelo was extremely traumatized by what happened to our older brother," Raphael told Shadow. "You make him feel safe."
Rather like you do for me, Shadow said.
"Pretty much," Raphael confirmed, blushing only slightly. "The thing is, I don't think he's felt this secure since the accident that took our brother."
Being said brother, Shadow desperately wanted to ask just what had happened, since he had no clear memories of the incident, but he didn't want to explain his curiosity, or dredge up painful memories. So, he kept silent. Still, it didn't stop his burgeoning protective instincts from flaring every time he saw the flicker of fear or panic in his little brother's eyes. He'd spent too many years living like that himself to stomach seeing it in Michelangelo's innocent gaze.
Fate, it seemed, had determined the past had been a mystery long enough, and she decided to step in and open the way for Shadow to get his answers, and for Michelangelo to finally work through the worst of his trauma.
The family was taking a jog through the sewers one evening, helping Shadow get familiar with the layout, when they hit a section that was extra wet from a recent rainfall. The excess water, combined with the slimy mold and mildew already covering the walk, made footing tricky and slippery. More than one of the turtles had slipped already, causing them to severely slow their pace. It was Michelangelo, however, who had the misfortune to lose his balance completely, and he ended up in the water.
The water level was elevated, and it was moving at a brisk pace, but nothing the turtle shouldn't have been able to deal with; except, when the orange-masked turtle hit the water, he began to panic. What was worse, Raphael and Donatello both froze as well. Shadow took this all in with only a glance, and suddenly it was like Shadow became someone else; someone who knew exactly what to do in this situation.
Dumping the excess weight of his weapons and gear on the ground, Shadow dove smoothly into the water, quickly making his way to the floundering Michelangelo. Unable to get a firm hold on the flailing turtle, Shadow applied a brief touch to several pressure points, bringing the frantic motion to an end. After that, it didn't take much to maneuver the younger turtle into the proper position to tow him to the walk paralleling the water where, by this time, Raphael and Donatello had pulled themselves together enough to help life the limp Michelangelo out of the water. Shadow was a little startled by the pair's tight, almost frantic, grip on him as they assisted him out as well. Shrugging it off, Shadow turned to Michelangelo, where a few deft touches released him from his temporary paralysis. The younger turtle immediately began to shake as reaction set in. A cursory glance revealed Donatello and Raphael weren't in much better condition.
Acting on knowledge that was deeper and more primal that mere instinct, welling up from this new awareness that had been direction Shadow's actions since the crisis began, the former slave began giving orders.
Raphael, he called to the action oriented turtle, knowing he would deal best with being given something physical to do. Give us a minute, and then lead us home. Quickest route you can think of, but let's try and keep it as dry as possible. Raphael involuntarily nodded, reacting to the order on instinct.
A firm hand on Donatello's arm connected him to the planner of the family, who knew simply knew would function better with something to keep his mind focused. Donatello, you'll need to be figuring out what we need to do when we get home. Let's see what we can do to minimalize the trauma from this as much as possible, Shadow said. He was relieved to see a little more focus in the genius's eyes as he began to do just that.
That finally left Michelangelo. Shadow simply grabbed the younger turtle by the hand, automatically interlacing their fingers, and pulled him to his feet. Allowing him to stick close, while maintaining the grip on Michelangelo's hand, they set off after Raphael.
Come on little brother, he said softly. Let's get home.
TMNT
Even upon arriving back at the Lair, Shadow still found himself maintaining the mantle of leadership he'd assumed since the incident started. He ordered Michelangelo to go take a warm shower, knowing the younger turtle needed it after the fall in the cold water. Raphael was directed to make a pot of tea, while Donatello was commissioned to collect several blankets and pile them on the couch, where the two younger turtles were settled once the tea was ready. Once Michelangelo was out of the shower, he too was bundled up, and he and Shadow joined the other huddled on the couch. Shadow once again found himself in the middle of the group, with Donatello and Michelangelo on either side of him so he could maintain in physical contact.
Okay, he said when everyone was settled. Someone care to explain what happened today? You all freaked out, almost turning this minor accident into a tragedy.
Raphael being Raphael, and scared to boot, replied in true Raphael-ian fashion. "Yeah, well, who dies and made you fearless leader, huh?"
Just like that, the bubble burst, and immediately it was Shadow's turn to start quaking as his behavior of the past two hours caught up to him. He instantly began blabbering apologies, even as he seemed to deflate and fold in on himself. This time, it was Donatello's turn to come to the rescue.
That's enough, he told Shadow firmly, breaking through the other turtle's remorseful prattle. You did well out there. If not for your intercession, Michelangelo very easily could have drowned. Just ignore Raphael; he gets snippy when he gets scared.
Yeah, sorry about that, said turtle said rather sheepishly. My mouth sometimes starts running before I engage my brain.
Shadow knew there was something seriously amiss when Michelangelo didn't take the clear opening to razz the older turtle. Pulling the younger turtle closer, Shadow asked again, So what happened out there? This is a rather dangerous secret to keep from someone who is responsible for watching your back.
You're right, of course, but it's a topic we find very difficult to talk about; Michelangelo in particular, Donatello told him. Our sensei discouraged us from discussing it, even amongst ourselves. He said we shouldn't dwell on it.
No offense to your sensei, but that doesn't make much sense, Shadow said with a bluntness that was heartening to hear. You've demonstrated to me the healing power of talking about painful events. However, I don't mean to pry, and if you'd rather not…
It's how our big brother disappeared, Michelangelo abruptly declared. We'd been out playing in the sewer, like we'd done a million times before, when the sewer unexpectedly flooded. We all knew how dangerous that could be, so we started for home. Only, I tripped and ended up in the water. It was moving too fast, and I'd gotten disoriented when I fell in, so I couldn't tell up from down. Before I could panic, though, I felt hands pulling me to the surface. My big brother Leo had jumped in after me, although he was only eight, and he somehow got me to the side. Raphael and Donatello had just pulled me out, and were reaching to help Leo, when he slipped back into the water and disappeared. Just like that, he was gone, and it was all my fault.
Shadow wrapped him in a tight embrace as sobs tore through him. Raphael and Donatello quietly stepped away, recognizing this was something very personal for their brother, and he didn't need an audience to witness as he laid bare his soul. Their turn would come later; right now, Shadow was doing what no one else had been able to in the past ten years.
I guess today was as close to a living nightmare as you could get, Shadow observed once Michelangelo had calmed a bit.
I…I couldn't even think, much less move, the younger turtle murmured. It was just like last time. I…I can't do this anymore.
Then don't, Shadow said, that unexpected tone of authority back in his voice. You've suffered from this nightmare long enough, don't you think?
"How do I stop it," the miserable turtle whispered.
Close your eyes, Shadow instructed. Now, this might be a bit painful, but you need to think about what happened that day. Remember the sounds of the water and your brothers, the smell of the wet sewer, the feel of the slippery ground beneath your feet.
Michelangelo whimpered slightly, but gamely did as he was told. Shadow continued to speak.
Now, you've fallen into the water. Take a moment to acknowledge the fear you felt. If you don't face it, you can't master it. You're disoriented, dizzy. Now, feel the hands coming to your rescue. Soak up the relief and knowledge you are safe. You're being pulled from the water; you can see and feel your brothers there, helping you. The next part is the most important, Mikey. Ignore what happened ten years ago; it doesn't matter anymore, because today everyone made it out safely. Your family is safe and whole again, if a little tattered around the edges. We made it home. That's what you need to remember the next time these memories try to take over. Just remind yourself, we all made it home.
By this time, Michelangelo was nearly asleep, every ounce of tension faded from his body. Whisper soft, the youngest turtle acknowledged through the bond what his heart had recognized, even if his conscious mind wasn't quite ready to accept it.
Love you, Leo. Glad you're home.
Certain the younger turtle was too out of it to remember this exchange, Leo/Shadow quietly replied, I love you too, baby brother.
So, we have Leo/Shadow using his brother's nickname for the first time. That is significant. I also gave you another vague clue about a future element of the story; see if you can figure out what it was. The question for everyone now is: will Mikey remember what happened here, or is Leo/Shadow's secret still safe? You'll just have to wait and see.