A/N: LOVED ALL THE REVIEWS :)) YOU GUYS RULE! Here's chapter 5 as promised! OKay, this chapter is very little to do with "present" time and more "past" time. I wanted to reveal a little more about Merlin's past from a different perspective and I will continue to do so. I also wanted to apologize to the Arthur fanatics, this story will have some of his backdrop, but the story is mostly going to be Merlin centered because I am a huge Merlin fan. I'm trying to balance it, but as you can see, I keep gravitating to Merlin. It's like second nature.
ALSO. IMPORTANT. Is anyone interested in making a youtube trailer for me!? I would loooooooove it if someone could. I just would like to see a trailer come out of this. So please PLEASE PLEASE. private message me if you want to. You'd be my best friend :))
KEEP UP THE REVIEWS :)))
Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, even though I really really wish I did because Colin Morgan.
Chapter 5
In all honesty, it made perfect sense for Gwen to become best friends with Morgana. God bless Merlin, but he could never quite nail the girl talk aspect of their friendship, and neither could Lancelot. And besides Sefa, who rarely visited, Gwen was the only girl in the group since Freya had died so it made perfect sense that when Morgana had come along, Gwen had flocked to her.
And really, they were quite perfect together. Every other day, since the day they had met, they would meet up on their lunch breaks and eat at a quaint little coffee shop in between two strip malls and talk about their jobs, beliefs, childhoods and so on. Their waiter, a boy named Mordred who looked no older than a sophomore in college and had unruly black curls, would flirt with them merciless and they would giggle over it because really, he was adorable.
Gwen was quite fond of the whole experience. Because when it came down to it, Gwen was lonely. Lancelot was busy at work and while he was a wonderful husband, better than Gwen could have ever imagined, he was tired when he came back from work and preferred to relax instead of talking about the details of their day. Merlin was busy juggling school and bartending, Gwaine was busy being Gwaine, and she had never been very close to Will or Percival. Will was a bit of an ass and Percival was just strangely quiet. Arthur was a bit of a spoiled brat, but they got on alright based on the two times they had talked, he was just always swamped with work.
It was a Friday, exactly a week after they had expanded their friend group, when Gwen was on her way to meet Morgana at the coffee shop. Upon arrival, she was surprised to notice that instead of just Morgana at their usual table, her brother was sitting next to her. Both of them looked ridiculously posh, as Merlin would have said had he been there. Morgana was wearing a black, form fitting, knee-length, strapless dress with a tight black business jacket over it. Her hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail, black eyeliner thick and perfect as always. Her lips were painted red and she wore red six-inch heels. Her brother wore similar colors, his black suit pants and suit jacket were perfectly tailored to fit him and he wore an expensive red shirt underneath, the first two buttons undone.
Together, they made a frightening team. Gwen subconsciously smoothed her hands over her plain yellow sundress, which she had paired with a brown belt and short brown cowboy boots.
Morgana's face broke out in a smile as Gwen approached the table and she stood to give her friend a hug, "Gwen! How are you?"
Gwen smiled and pulled her chair back, "I'm great. I wasn't expecting to see you, Arthur. I mean, not that I'm not glad to see you. I am. It's just a surprise, that's all. Not a bad one," she was blushing by the end of it because Lancelot was wonderful, but Arthur was plain gorgeous and why had Morgana had to bring him along.
He laughed, and even his laugh was perfect, "Well Morgana told me I needed to take a break."
"He overworks himself," She stated simply, folding her napkin in her lap like the polite person she was, "It frustrates me."
"Like father like son."
"He's really a shining example to live by," Morgana rolled her eyes and then turned back to Gwen, "How was work?"
She shrugged, "It was okay. We had a litter of kittens come in today. Someone just left them outside a store, can you believe that? Just these little, helpless kittens, abandoned, just like that. We're rehoming them if either of you want one."
Morgana looked thoughtful, her red lip between her teeth, but Arthur shook his head, "I'm not a cat person."
Gwen tilted her head, "Really? That's surprising to me."
His eyebrows knitted together and he seemed frustrated for a second, "Merlin said the same thing."
Mordred came to take their order and threw one look at Arthur and a disappointed look crossed his eyes. When he had finished taking their order, he placed his pen and pad back into his pocket and paused, "Is this your boyfriend?"
Morgana looked torn between disturbed and busting out laughing, "No, no, no, no! That's Arthur. He's my brother."
Mordred's shoulders immediately relaxed. Arthur looked like he was constipated, "Alright. I'll just put your orders in and be right back."
As soon as he was gone, Morgana leaned over the table and beamed at her, "I don't know if I told you, but tonight is my date with Merlin."
Gwen's smile faltered and she tried to quickly cover it up, but it didn't work in time. Morgana's face quickly turned concerned, "You're not happy…"
This seemed to even pick up Arthur's attention, who had recently been busy checking out the blonde waiter who in turn had been checking him out.
"No! It's not that. I mean, it is, but it's not for the reasons you think. It's just," she bit her lip, trying to think of the right way to put this, "it's just I don't think you should go. I mean, I don't think you shouldn't date, just not right now. One day. Just not today. You can still go if you want. I mean I'm not gonna stop you."
"Why?" Her voice was a whisper and Arthur raised an eyebrow and suddenly Gwen felt attacked, "I mean I really like him, Gwen. If this is because he's your ex, I understand. Girl code and all."
"No!" She smiled at that because how many girls had thought it was because of that, "I don't care! I'm worried about you, not me! Merlin has a lot of baggage right now. He hasn't been able to keep a steady relationship in years."
"You don't really like him, Morgana," Arthur suddenly spoke up.
Morgana's eyes turned thunderous and really, Morgana was quite intimidating when she wanted to be, "Who are you to tell me who I do and don't like."
"You don't know him. You've texted for all of six days and hung out once. You don't even know anything about him and frankly, I'm with Gwen. I think you should wait."
"Oh, don't go playing the protective brother now."
Morgana opened her mouth to talk, but Gwen held up her hand and the siblings turned to her surprised, "Either way, I think you should wait. Just a little longer. But that's only advice, you can do whatever you want."
That seemed to stop her in her tracks. She looked down at her napkin, not even glancing up as Mordred brought them their food. Gwen, for a minute, felt absolutely horrible for what she had said, but she was sick and tired of seeing these girls get their hopes up and then leaving once they realized Merlin's feelings were forced and not genuine and that, yes, he was still in love with someone else and it wasn't them.
Nevertheless, it made the rest of the meal sufficiently awkward. Morgana was clearly disappointed, Arthur was humming happily to himself due to the fact that he no longer had to worry about Merlin being his brother-in-law. And Gwen felt horribly guilty.
It was after lunch when Morgana finally hugged Gwen, "Same time, Monday, yeah?"
"I'll be here," Morgana turned to leave, but Gwen grabbed her arm, "I'm sorry. It's just…I want what's best for everyone."
Morgana smiled and patted her hand, "I know, Gwen. That's what I love about you."
There was an awkward hug passed between Arthur and Gwen, and damn, Arthur was muscular.
Gwen had only just gotten back to work and sat down when she got a text. She pulled her phone open and frowned. It was from Merlin.
Merlin: u told morgana not 2 go on a date w/ me?
Gwen: i told her to wait just to make sure its right, you know? I didn't mean to offend u :(
Merlin: I luv u babe but let me handle my love life ok? No hard feelings I just gotta fix this now
Gwen: don't force anything
Merlin: Im not gonna rape her gwen
Gwen: No, ur feelings silly ;)
Merlin: Oh! I won't.
Gwen: love you :) :*
Merlin: u 2 :)
She smiled. She and Merlin had never been able to stay mad at each other for more than a few minutes. They had ended up laughing and hugging five minutes after she had broken up with him.
But she did wish Merlin could understand why she had said what she had said.
They wouldn't understand. Arthur and Morgana. They couldn't. They hadn't been there.
The television was on in the background, drowning out the booming thunder outside and the pitter-patter of the rain on the roof. Gwen had her feet on Lance's lap, her fingers entwined with his on her lap. She's talking about her job when his phone rings. Hers is charging, in the bedroom somewhere, so it makes her jump.
Lance leans forward, picks it off the coffee table in front of them. He hands it to her, "It's Merlin. Probably something to do with the wedding."
Gwen sits up, a smile spreading across her mouth, "Freya is probably still upset that he forgot to put their flower order in. It'll only be a minute, babe."
Lance nods and leans back. Gwen answers the phone, "Hello?"
"Lancelot DuLac?"
And as much as Gwen loves Lancelot, she hates that last name. She doesn't, however, recognize the voice and it makes her uneasy. Why would a stranger call from Merlin's phone, "No, this is his wife."
"This is Dr. Thomas from Roosevelt Hospital. Your husband is listed as Merlin Emrys' emergency contact –"
Gwen instantly jumps to her feet and her heart is in her throat. Lance, already clearly tuned in on that something is wrong, is standing with her and he looks frightened, "Wait, what?"
"Your friend has been in a car accident-"
"Oh my gosh." She's moving towards the door and Lancelot is grabbing the keys. She's trembling from head to toe. Merlin is her best friend and if anything horrible has happened to him…she can't even process the thought.
"-his car hydroplaned. He and," there's a pause as if he's looking down at his file, "Freya Bastet have been brought in. We'll need you and your husband to come in as soon as you can."
Lance locks the door behind them and only then does Gwen notice his hands are shaking too. Tears are pricking at her eyes and she's sure her voice cracks, "Are they okay?"
"They're alive, but we will discuss the details once you are here."
"Okay, okay. Which hospital?" Lance is starting the car and pulling away from the curb, his tires screeching.
"Roosevelt."
"Okay, we're on our way," She's just barely pressed the end call button before a sob escapes her throat.
"What happen?" Lance's voice is panicked, and that unsteadies her because Lance never panics but Merlin was his world at one time so Gwen does understand, "Gwen, baby, what happen?"
She's trying her best to compose herself, while she pulls up the contacts to call Merlin's mother and Will, "They're…they've been in a car accident-"
"Merlin. Is Merlin alive?" And he hasn't take his eyes off the road, but he's crying and Gwen's heart shatters.
"Yeah, yeah. They won't tell me how bad he is, but he's alive. He's alive."
Hunith doesn't answer on her home phone or her cell phone and that makes sense because it's almost ten-thirty here, which means it's nearing three-thirty there and she's likely asleep. She leaves a voicemail saying to call her back immediately and then calls Will, who also doesn't answer for the same reason. She doesn't have Gwaine's number, who has just recently become Merlin's good friend, so there's no way of contacting him. She doesn't have Freya's parents either, but she assumes the doctor has already called them anyway.
The hospital is a good fifteen minutes from their apartment and they both sit quietly, a shaky breath escaping one of them occasionally. Both of them are trying very hard not to think of the worst scenario, but in times like this, it seems almost impossible not to do just that.
Once the car is parked, Gwen grabs her purse and they're rushing into the ER, only to be redirected to the Intensive Care Unit, which does nothing for their nerves.
Gwen is the first one to the desk and she practically plows into it, "Merlin Emrys and Freya Bastet?"
"Dr. Thomas will be here to talk to you shortly." The receptionist says, and there's a numbness to her voice, something that comes only with the job.
Gwen sits, but Lance does not. He chooses to pace, wringing his hands in front of him and twirling his wedding band around his finger. When the doctor does approach them, Gwen loses it all over again, standing to her feet and rushing to meet him, "I'm Gwen. We talked on the phone."
"Yes. And this must be Lancelot?"
Lance nods and the doctor nods back, "I'll have a few questions for you to answer before I can discuss details."
Gwen doesn't even listen as the doctor asks if Merlin has any allergies or history of seizures or anything. She's too busy trying not to break down in the middle of the waiting room.
"He's alive." It's supposed to come out as a statement, but it sounds like a question.
"Yes," the doctor is really far too calm, but he picks up a clipboard, "Now, his injury list is extensive, but there is every chance he will recover fully."
Gwen's hand is on her stomach, the other on her mouth, as some of the panic leaves and relief floods in, "Oh thank God."
"He has three broken ribs, a severe concussion, a fractured arm and a dislocated shoulder. Other than that, it's just a few scratches and bruises. Very few needed stitches. He's been given a sedative to allow him to rest, but I imagine he'll be awake by tomorrow. Now, Freya Bastet, I'm assuming she's a friend of yours as well?"
"Yes," they both answer simultaneously, "She's Merlin's fiancée."
Something like remorse passes the doctor's face, but it's gone almost immediately, the cold mask slipping back into place, "She doesn't have near as long as a list, but she did suffer a blow to her head and neck."
There's a moment of silence.
"There's damage to the brain. We've put her into a medically-induced coma in order for her body to heal and to allow the brain swelling to go down. She's breathing on her own, but…," the doctor glances up at them from his clipboard, "if she does wake up, and I'm sure she will, there's a good chance the brain damage might be permanent."
That hits Gwen like a ton of bricks. She can't breathe all of sudden. This isn't fair, Freya never deserved this. Sweet, shy, wonderfully beautiful Freya never deserved this.
Gwen breaks into a sob and she's vaguely aware of Lance's hand wrapping around her waist as he speaks to the doctor.
Merlin wakes up the next morning and they're allowed to see him, leaving their uncomfortable makeshift bed (two chairs pushed together) in the waiting room. Gwen has already spoken to his mother and Will and they're both getting on the first flight to America.
He looks horrendous. He's propped up on the hospital bed, IV tubes in his arm and a heart monitor taped to his chest. There's a large, stitched gash right below his hairline and it will probably scar. His arm is in a sling, a thin cast placed on it, and his shoulder his wrapped, the bandage peeking out from underneath his hospital gown. There a numerous cuts all along his neck and face, probably from the windshield. A large purple and yellow bruise is forming right above his left eyebrow, and there is a gash on the bridge of his nose, also stitched close.
He answers the doctors question, interrupting every few minutes to ask where Freya is, but the doctor won't answer. He turns to them before he leaves, saying if they need a nurse to press the call button and then closes the door behind him.
Gwen is the one to tell him what happens and she watches Merlin's face crumble. She leaves out the fact that Freya might be permanently brain damaged, it isn't the right time.
She holds his hand while he cries and stays with him long after. Hunith arrives late that evening and holds her son as he cries. Will makes trips to the cafeteria and brings them food. He sits and watches T.V. with Merlin, who isn't really watching. Merlin sleeps a lot and barely eats. Gwaine is called at some point and shows up and it's a strange thing to see Gwaine somber.
Freya's parents don't stop in to see Merlin until the second day. Her mother looks horrible, too many tears shed, and her father looks tired. Merlin takes one look at them and falls apart, "I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry."
He repeats it over and over again like a broken record. Freya's mom, her name is Julie, takes his hand and kisses it, "Oh sweetie, we could never blame you."
Gwen leaves them to talk, kissing Merlin on the forehead.
Hunith is the first one to see Freya besides her parents and the only one at this point. She greets Gwen at the cafeteria and her face is hopeful, "She doesn't look near as bad as him. I think she'll wake up."
When she leaves, Lance, who's sitting with Gwaine and Gwen, looks down at his hands. Gwaine is the one to notice though; he's the least zombie-like of them all, "What's up, man?"
Lance looks up and he's so incredibly sad that he almost rivals Merlin, "I don't think she will, honestly."
Gwen is shocked at this, "How can you even say that right now? None of us need to hear that."
Lance just looks sad, "I just have this feeling."
"A feeling?" She shoves her chair back and stands up, "The only feeling we can afford to have right now is hope. She'll wake up, you'll see."
Merlin is released the third day. He doesn't go home. He goes straight to Freya and he breaks down all over again at the sight of her and so does Gwen. Honestly, Hunith is right. There's a few bruises and cuts, but nothing horrible. Merlin still looks worse. But she's lying so still and her breath is so uneven that it hurts to watch.
Merlin doesn't leave her bedside until visiting hours are over. Even then, he sleeps in the waiting room. Every time the speaker system went off, announcing "Code Blue, ICU", Merlin, no matter how long he'd been asleep, would sit up, panicked until Gwen reassured him it wasn't Freya.
Six days after the accident, they stopped giving her the medicine to keep her asleep. She still didn't wake up.
One day, they were sitting in the café when Merlin turned to her. There were black circles under his eyes, but the bruises were healing nicely, "Thanks for being here, Gwen."
Gwen could only lean over and kiss him on the cheek, "I'll always be here."
Merlin nodded, then looked down at his hand, "Gwen, I'm scared. I'm so scared she won't wake up."
His voice cracked on the last syllable and Gwen leaned forward and hugged him because it's all she could do.
Three days later, eight days after the accident, they were sitting with her. Merlin was stroking her palm with his good hand, talking to her about how as soon as she woke up they had to get back to planning their wedding and how she needs to wake up now because he misses her eyes when the heart monitor started beating frantically.
Gwen, who was leaning back in the chair beside Merlin, sat up. Merlin's eyes were wide, "Gwen, what's happening? Gwen!"
"I don't know!"
Nurses rushed in and one bent over Freya, the other pulling Merlin and Gwen away. The one by Freya hissed at the other nurse, "Code Blue. Code blue. Her heart's stopped."
"NO!" Merlin pushed frantically against the male nurse and Gwen's heart was in her throat. Everything happened in slow motion, just like it always had in the movies.
"I'm sorry, sir." The nurse said before giving the final gentle push outside the door and closing it as a doctor rushed in.
"Damn it! Fuck!" Merlin slammed his fist against the door, "Fucking let me in! Fuck!"
Gwen grabbed Merlin's shoulders, careful not to hurt his injured one, and pulled him back towards her. He fought her for a minute, cussing and screaming, stopping a few nurses in their tracks, but they understood. He collapsed into her arms, sobbing. Will rushed up from the cafeteria (Lance had to go back to work since his job wouldn't pay for any more personal days) after a text from Gwen.
Together, they sat with Merlin until the doctor came out.
Time of death: February 15th, 2012, 5:23:21PM.
REVIEW. Please! i need the encouragment. Long reviews are my favorite ;) but i'm not picky. Love you alllll.
