"This day just can't get any better. Hello, Janice. What man on Tammeron did you come to castrate?"
"Jimmy Kirk. Still keeping my seat on the Enterprise warm? I will be the first female captain of a deep space mission."
"I'm sure you will. Hope it works out. Can you please leave?"
"Jim, who is this woman?" Uhura asked, irritation etched in every word.
"Nyota Uhura? Meet Janice Lester."
"Ah! Spock's sex toy. Heard you were a languages genius. Bet you're the only female department head on the Enterprise."
Uhura had confronted Kirk more than once about the dearth of female department heads on the Enterprise. But that didn't give this Lester woman permission to berate Jim in Uhura's presence. Not today.
"We're a young crew, Ms. Lester. Jim will adjust the crew assignments as he sees fit."
"Doctor Lester, Lieutenant. Chris Pike promoted you - your captain will only promote women he can sleep with. That's why I'm NOT your Science or Chief Medical Officer. Jimmy won't sleep with women who know more about his captain's job than he does. You aren't ready, Jimmy. You gotta have balls to sit in the captain's chair. Yours are still developing. That's why you're in this dump moping about your dead daddy. George Kirk had a set; he rode the Kelvin into immortality."
Janice Lester hit a nerve with Uhura, accusing Captain James T. Kirk of being weak-kneed - the same man who died to save Earth, his crew and his ship.
"I didn't select you, Janice, because you'd poison the chemistry on my ship."
"I've got a damn good reason to be angry, Jimmy! Starfleet gave you my ship!"
"Get a life, Doctor Lester, and stop sucking the life out of me! I may not deserve the Enterprise but the Enterprise and her crew don't deserve you!"
Kirk didn't recognize her intent until whatever she had ordered stung his eyes. Pain forced them closed so Jim missed her balled fist when it slammed into his face. His head swam with dizziness from the punch and the bourbon. Disoriented, he couldn't rid his eyes of the alcohol burning the sensitive skin under his lids.
Kirk's face rotated back into striking range as Janice Lester released her second blow...
...into the waiting palm of Nyota Uhura.
Capturing Lester's fist, Uhura clamped down and twisted Lester's arm behind her shoulder blade. Lester screamed in pain and frustration. Struggling telegraphed pain across Lester's shoulder and down her arm.
Uhura mentally thanked Spock for all those sparring sessions where he kicked Uhura's ass. Janice "The Angry Be-yotch" Lester was sooooo much easier to handle than Spock.
"Dr. Lester. You seem to be misinformed. The Jim Kirk you see before you earned that chair. Let me explain how -"
Uhura yanked Lester's arm further upward.
"- now that I have your complete attention. He's a genius at strategy and tactics. He's a leader whose crew would follow him into Hell if it would save somebody. He's so loyal he lost his ship for violating the Prime Directive. And he'd do anything for his crew. He died for them like his father did. Jim Kirk's a hero, Dr. Lester."
Uhura spun the woman, releasing Lester's arm to free her own fist. Lester's momentum carried her 180-degrees, facing Uhura. Uhura's fist connected soundly with Lester's jaw, laying the doctor back across her bar stool. In a deliberate manner, Uhura paid the bill - including Lester's - and left a large tip for the bartender.
"Time to go home, Jim. C'mon."
Placing an arm around her captain, Uhura grunted her encouragement as she hoisted Jim onto his feet and steered him out of the establishment. Buzz slowly increased in intensity, not to normal levels but providing evidence that Jim Kirk would survive his father's legend. Once outside, she comm'd the Enterprise for beam-out.