25

I'm Home Now

I found a major mistake in this chapter so I had to go back to a previous chapter and correct it. Eric and Freyda have been married for a little over five years. The explanation is in this chapter. Forgive me for my slight. I hope that this will clear things up for the readers who feel that Eric was being deceitful in his marriage to Freyda and hiding the truth from Sookie. It wasn't his fault. It was mine.

I will post the actual meeting between Eric and Flynn tomorrow.

Anyway, I hope that y'all enjoy the chapter. And as always, thank you for making this story one of your favorites, the reviews and the alerts.

I thought that after seeing his sleeping daughter, Eric was going to realize that regardless of what happened with his father, I should've made more of an effort to make sure that he knew about his daughter. I thought that he was going to tell me that he wanted nothing else to do with me. He only wanted to see his child. What if he wants to file for full custody and because of his money and contacts, he wins. He could give me limited access to Flynn and then what? He could've said any of those things to me but he didn't. I was wrong.

When he turned to look at me, what I thought was going to happen, didn't happen at all. He took me in his arms and kissed me, deeply and passionately. I closed my eyes and it felt like I was dreaming. My body ached for his touch. I've waited so long for him to hold me like this. I wanted desperately to feel my body beneath his; giving myself only to him but I would not allow it to happen. I wanted to give in to the lust that was burning inside of me but I couldn't. I had to stop him.

I took my mouth from his and looked down at his chest. "We need to talk about your marriage. It's the huge, purple, polka dotted Freyda in the room and I don't like it. You are going to have to explain to me why you are married to her. I want to know everything."

"And you will know everything. We will talk about it," he whispered. "I will tell you everything that you need to know. I will hide nothing from you. Do you trust me?"

"I do," I said as I rested my head against his chest.

He wrapped me up in his arms and held me tighter. He pressed my head against his chest and kissed it as he continued to apologize. "I'm sorry, lover. I didn't want to marry her. You're the only woman that I've ever wanted to marry. I've lost over ten years of my life doing as others have asked of me. I've spent five years with a woman that I despise but no more, Sookie. I love you and Flynn. Here is where I belong."

"I know," I whispered.

"I will leave her."

"And you don't love her?" I asked.

He shook his head no. "I've never loved her."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wasn't given the chance to tell you," he said. "She beat me to it. When I told you earlier today that I was going to come to you tonight and we would talk, that meant that I was going to tell you everything. After my little … outburst when I learned of your 'kind of friend', I realized that I had no right to be angry. You have every right to move on with your life but I wanted you to know the truth before you decide to move on. I don't want that. I decided that if I am going to reclaim what is mine, I needed to be honest with you. I didn't want you to hear it from anyone other than me."

"She couldn't let that happen. It was her big chance to try and destroy us. To destroy the image that I have of you. My love for you." I chuckled. "She had to be the one tell me. She knew that it would hurt more coming from her because I wouldn't learn the truth from her. She wanted her words to hurt and they did. They do."

"I never wanted you to find out that way."

"I hate her," I said. "I'm supposed to be your wife."

He lifted me into his arms and said, "I know, lover, and you will be."

"I know."

And just like that, his mouth claimed my own.

It felt so good and so right even though it was so wrong. I hated myself for enjoying it. "I hate you, Eric Northman," I said into his mouth. "I hate what you've done to me."

"I know, lover," he repeated. He kissed me again before speaking. "You hurt me, Sookie."

I rested my forehead to his and answered, "I wanted you to be here. I wanted to share the pregnancy with you. I didn't have …"

"Not that. I understand why you did what you did. I would have done what you did. What hurts me is that you believe that I'd be over you so easily. That is what hurts," he replied. "That has never been an option for me."

I stared into his eyes as I admired him. "God, I love you but I really hate your wife."

This time he laughed but softly. "I know," he replied. "I hate her, too."

I gave him another quick kiss before I told him to put me down. "We need to talk about us."

I took his hand and led him to the couch. Once we were seated, I said, "As you can probably tell, I've never stopped loving you. I've tried but I can't stop. You were my first love but I want you to know that if any part of you loves Freyda, then we can no longer be friends. We can be nothing. I will contact one of the headhunters and I'll work for them. I will resign from your company and I'm out of your life for good. We will co-parent our daughter and that's it."

"Okay." I could tell by the look on his face that he didn't believe me. He believed that I was going to fall at his feet … regardless of the fact that he's married.

"I mean it, Eric. I want you to know that I'd never keep you away from Flynn again but you and I can never be together. That's just the way it will have to be as long as you are married to Freyda."

A crooked smile appeared on his face. He still didn't believe me. I guess I'll just have to show him.

So what I did next was ignore that crooked smile and continue on. I placed my hand on his and said, "I want you to tell me why you had to marry her. I want to know what your parents did to put you in this predicament. I want to know why it appears that you haven't tried to get out of this marriage. Is it because you do have feelings for her? Are you drawn to her?"

"I'm not drawn to her."

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "Then why? How can you marry a woman that you don't love? Make me understand how something like happens. People don't marry people that they don't love. You're not supposed to do that. What plausible reasons are there for anyone to do this?"

"In my world, they do it every day," he said. "There's no rhyme or reason to it. It's just the way things are."

I couldn't believe what I heard. "Marriage is sacred and it's forever. How can you marry someone and not have the intentions of being with them forever? Marriage is supposed to be between two people who love each other. You should never be forced to marry someone that you don't love. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy much less someone that I'm supposed to love."

"You're so naïve to the way our world works and I love that," he said. "In our world, all marriages are not based off of love. Some are based off of obligation and she's an obligation. I would never have married her if it had been up to me. Money is an ugly thing in the wrong hands."

I rested my back against the arm of the couch and stared at him. "I saw her ring. The ring that you bought her is gorgeous. It was so huge and so … huge. How could you buy her such a ring if you don't love her?"

"Because I didn't buy it," he said. "She bought that herself. I wouldn't have squandered the money. There is only one woman that I've gotten an engagement ring and that woman is you, Sookie."

"Seriously?" I asked.

"Seriously," he answered.

"Have you really been married to her for five years?"

He nodded.

So far, I have a little understanding to what has happened but he still had more questions to answer. "She was with you during your hardest time," I said. "She stood at your side and held your hand. You have been sharing your life with her … your bed. For five years, she's been your wife. She has been everything that a wife should be. She said that you wanted her with you. She said that you needed her. Is that true?"

Eric shook his head no. "No. We share a home and nothing more. We sleep at different ends of the compound. We don't share beds. Yes, we slept together but that was before we were married. I haven't slept with her since. Freyda is nothing to me. She means nothing. I won't consummate this marriage. I can't. I won't."

I was completely dumbstruck. "You've haven't slept with her since you've married?"

"Not once," he said.

"How long did you date her?"

"We dated for three months." His anger was prevalent as he spoke.

How can a good looking man like Eric not sleep with anyone for five years? That's just not possible. I wanted to know if he's been with other women. Knowing that I didn't have the right to ask, I did anyway. "Have you slept with other women?"

He closed his eyes briefly as he nodded his head yes. "I have."

Okay. Enough of that.

"Vacations?" I asked.

"Business," he answered. "Our entire relationship is business."

I get it now. I get why I couldn't find any information about their relationship online. What woman wouldn't want her marriage known to the world? I'd scream it from the rafters. I'd make sure that every paper in the world knew that Eric and I were married but Freyda didn't. I get it now. "Is that why your marriage wasn't in any of the tabloids or the news?"

"Yes. It's only a business arrangement," he confirmed. "As long as the others know that the Northmans and the Maddens have merged, everything has gone as planned. We have to put on a united front. That's what we do. That's all that we do."

Shaking my head, I said, "You don't love her."

He scooted closer to me as he continued to talk, "She is nothing more than a business plan. I'm only in her life to keep the sharks from trying to steal her grandfather's businesses away from her. That is the only reason I am with her. My name and a debt that my mother owed is why we're married. I don't love her. I am not and have never been in love with her, Sookie."

"And Victor is her dad?" I asked.

Something appeared in Eric's eyes as he said yes. "She is his daughter," he growled.

I sat up and looked at him. With my knees folded up to my chest, I asked, "Did you ever make love with her?"

His eyes softened as he said, "In order to make love with someone you have to love them. I've never made love with anyone but you. Do you make love with your 'kind of dating' guy? Alcide is it?"

"No, but we are dating," I said. "And how do you know his name? I never told you."

"I have my ways," he said.

"You've been following me," I accused.

"Yes," he confirmed. "I've spent a lot of my time looking for you. You were always so hard to find but I finally found you."

At least he wasn't ashamed of it but he was wrong about one thing.

I shook my head no. "I wasn't that hard to find. I've always been here with Pam. If you knew where Pam was then you knew where I was. She's been in New York since my freshman year of college. I may have changed the spelling of my name and switched schools, but I was always around. I wasn't hard to find at all. Wigs and sunglasses were horrible disguises."

He frowned but didn't say anything. I could see that something was going on in that handsome head of his but I couldn't tell what it was but that's okay. Once he figures it out, he'll tell me. We needed to talk about Alcide and the relationship that he and I have.

"As you seemingly already know, I'm seeing Alcide," I said. "We've been seeing each other off and on for a few years now. I met him a little after I first moved here. He was working on one of the penthouses in the building that Pam and I lived in. We'd laugh and talk in the hallways. He was comfortable and easy to take to. He wasn't like the other guys that I've dated. They never got past the first date. He was different. I liked him. He asked me out and the rest is history."

Eric stared straight ahead. "Do you love him?"

I nodded my head yes. "I do," I answered. "I'm not in love with him but I do love him. I can't hurt him by being with you." Staring into Eric's eyes, I whispered, "I've never wanted to hurt him." But something in my heart told me that it was going to be inevitable.

"Are you saying that you are his now?" His body stiffened as he waited for my answer.

"No. That's not what I'm saying. I'm not his. I've never been his. I want to be with you but I can't be with you. You're married, Eric. Don't you get it? I'll be the other woman. I'm not the other woman type. I have to be the only one."

"And you are," he said. "You have been my only lover. I want no other."

He slid even closer to me and placed his strong hand on the base of my neck to pull me in to kiss me; only he didn't. He kissed my face and nuzzled my neck. It was heaven. Whispering in my ear, he said, "Do you still want me, Sookie?"

With my lips barely touching his face, I said, "I've always wanted you."

When he brought his mouth closer to mine, I had force myself to turn my head. "We can't and we won't. I am not going …"

This time he interrupted me. "There is no reason why we can't be together. I love you. This is where I belong … here with you and Flynn. As soon as I found you, I began taking the necessary steps to get out of this sham of a marriage. I am not going to stay married to her, Sookie. I gave you my ring and I will marry you. I will soon have this marriage annulled. I promise you. I will be with you."

He was talking about ending his marriage to Freyda as if he was about to take out the trash.

"I can't believe you," I said as I laughed.

"Well, believe it," he said. "I will have you."

"After you are no longer married," I clarified.

"Okay," he pouted. He pulled me closer to him and wrapped his arm around my shoulder while I rested my head on his.

"How do you think she found out about Flynn? It had to have been your father."

He shook his head. "I agree with you. I also believe that others are involved but I can promise that she didn't do this on her own. She's known for quite some time for her to bring it up on the night you invite me over. I'm sure that Appius and Victor had a hand in telling her. She's not smart enough to have found out on her own. I'm more than sure that Appius was the one that intercepted your letters and made sure that none of mine reached you."

As I snuggled deeper into his side, I said, "She was holding on to it so that she could use it to keep you away from me. What did she say when she told you?"

"That I have a daughter that you've been hiding from me," he said. "You are not the wonderful woman that I've always believed you to be. She said that you didn't love me as I have loved you. And no. I didn't believe her. I asked her how she knew of my child and she said that she'd hired a private investigator but I don't believe that. She knows nothing of private investigators. That wasn't her doing."

"I concur," I answered. "What do we do?" I asked.

"We're working on it," he assured me. "Don't worry. Niall and I are handling everything. If I need your help, I can count on you. Will you help me?"

"Yes," I said as I lifted my face to his.

"So, right now, they don't matter. This is about you, Flynn, and me. This is our time."

"You're right. They don't matter now. All that matters is that we know the truth now."

With that said he pulled me onto his lap and stared into my eyes. "My God, you're beautiful," he said.

I could see in his eyes what he wanted but I couldn't give it to him. So once again, I removed myself from his body and began talking about Flynn. This night was all about her.

"I can't wait for you to meet her. She's so smart. I've already told you that they want to skip her up to the sixth grade. She's already doing geometry and she's only nine." I then rolled my eyes and made a goofy face. "I must be nuts for repeating myself. Her babysitter, Grace, has taught her Spanish. Pam has been teaching her about art and your homeland. She has been learning Swedish. I bought the Rosetta Stone so that she could learn. She also speaks French. She wants to learn Italian but I think that she can save that for next year. She loves to go to museums and shopping. She got that from Pam … shopping and museums. They love museums."

I shot up from the couch and motioned for him to follow me down the hall. When I opened the door to the spare room, he was right behind me. "I hate to do this to you but you're going to have to spend the night. This is where you'll sleep. She told me that she prays for you every night. So tonight, we have to make her prayers come true. She wants to meet you tomorrow so you need to be here when she wakes up," I said as I walked into the room.

I walked over to the bed and pulled the covers back and went to the closet to get him an extra blanket and pillow. When I turned back around, I stepped right into him. I looked up at him but didn't know what to think. I couldn't tell if he'd heard a word that I'd said.

"I need a change of clothes," he said.

I walked around him and said, "I have some sweats that you can wear. They're a large. I wore them when I was pregnant and they have a drawstring. You can put those on. They may be a little short on you because you're so damned tall but you can sleep in those." I put the pillow and blanket on the bed. Once again, when I turned around, there he was … looking at me and underfoot.

I nervously looked around the room and said, "It's not much but it'll do. The bed's comfortable and there's a TV. A big one, too. Jason sleeps in here when he comes to visit."

He said nothing. He only stared at me. I looked around and tried to step around him but he stepped in front of me again.

"Excuse me," I said. I tried to side step him again. He stepped in front of me again.

"I like your pajamas," he said.

"Thank you. Oh, I have a Tweety Bird night shirt that you can wear if you don't want to wear the sweats." He can't walk around here in his underwear with a child in the house. "I also have a pair of NYU boxer shorts if you'd prefer those instead of the sweat pants. Let me know which you'd rather wear."

Ignoring everything I'd said, Eric looked around the spare room and said, "It is a little plain."

"But the bed's comfortable and there's a big TV," I repeated.

"Where do you sleep?"

I pointed down the hall and said, "My room's across … why?"

He shrugged his shoulders and came over to me and played with the zipper on the front of my pajamas. "I need to know just in case I need anything."

Removing his fingers from my zipper, I said, "Well, come on. I'll show you around. That way if you do need anything, you can find it on your own."

When we left the spare room, I told him that his bathroom was right across the hall. "Flynn and I have our own bathrooms so you won't have to worry about us taking too long in the shower. This is the linen closet. You'll find all of your towels and washcloths in there. We also have body sponges if you prefer those. They're on the bottom shelf. You know Flynn's room. This is another spare room. There's only a bed in there. We never use it. I don't know why I got the four-bedroom apartment. Gran said that it was too much. Gran'pa said that it was just right. He said that I might one day need the rooms." The next door we walked past was mine and that door was closed. I didn't mention my room.

Eric stopped and asked, "What room is this?"

"Flynn's playroom; come on," I lied. I kept walking and showing him around. When we got to the room just off of the living room, I said, "This is my office … but you know that already. It used to be a den but I turned it into my office. I needed the work space. It also keeps me from working so late at the office. If you need to use the computer, it's in here. The laptop and the iPad are in here also. Flynn usually uses the iPad for school. We have wi-fi. The password is …" When I turned around, there was no Eric.

"Eric," I called. I went back down the hall and peeked in Flynn's room. He wasn't there. I closed my eyes and looked towards my bedroom. The door was closed but I knew that he was in there.

When I went into my room, he was lying on my bed. "This isn't the playroom."

"Why are you in my room?"

"I love you, Sookie."

I just stood there because I couldn't take a step forward. If I had, I would've lost all of my inhibitions and I would be the other woman.

With his head, he pointed at my diploma. "You little minx; Sookeh Stachaus. That was very smart of you to change the spelling of your name. Did you use that name often?"

"When I had to," I whispered. If you want to know the truth, I used it every chance that I got. "I got the idea from Bill Compton. He's never really said my name properly; you know? I've never understood that. Every day in the halls at the high school, he'd say 'Good morning, Sookeh.'" I shook my head as I contemplated the reasons why my name was so hard for Bill to say. "Never made a bit of sense," I muttered.

Clearly, Eric ignored what I'd said about Bill. He got up from the bed and walked over to me. He kissed my forehead and my cheeks. He tried returning his fingers to my zipper. And once again, I removed them. "We can't, Eric. This isn't right. This isn't what we do."

He moved in even closer to me, as if that was even possible, and stared down at me. He was studying my face as he smiled at me. "I haven't made love to you in ten years. It's been torture. For so long, I've imagined holding you in my arms. Waking up to you. I've waited ten years and I'm more than sure that I can wait a little longer. I won't pressure you into doing anything that you don't want to do." He hurriedly added, "But if you change your mind, let me know."

His final comment made me laugh. "Thank you for understanding. I don't want to be the other woman and I may not be married to him, but I have to tell Alcide. I can't betray him. It's enough that I've been letting you slip me the tongue. I can't let you get into my panties. At least not yet," I added.

He chuckled as he wrapped his arms around me. "Not yet."

I then took his hand and led him to my bed. "Come on," I said. "We may not be able to have sex but we can lay down and talk like we used to when we were kids."

He let me pull him onto my bed. "I know that we can't have sex yet but can we at least fool around?"

I laughed at him as I said, "No."

"Not even a little bit," he said.

"No," I repeated as I laughed.

Once we'd lain down, we talked about a lot of nothing but it was everything. It felt like time hadn't passed for us. It was nice and it was real. Though I wanted to stay in the past, we had to come to what was right before us.

As I was lying on my side facing Eric, I kissed his nose and said, "You know, you haven't exactly told me what your burdens were."

"Freyda," he said.

I nestled deeper into my pillow as I contemplated what that meant. And so far, it meant nothing because I didn't quite understand. I needed more. "Why is she a burden?"

"Because of my mother," he said. "I was contractually obligated to marry her because of an obligation that my mom had with the Madden family. She owed them and she offered me up as payment. She signed the contract before I was born. She gave over my freedom; never once thinking of me. But pretty soon, my lover, things will change. Niall and I are working to get me out of this and we won't stop until I'm free."

"I'm sorry that this has happened to you."

His face looked like marble. "I've been tempted to walk away but I did not. I could not. Everyone thinks that it's so easy to just walk away. It's not. Contracts are binding. Steps have to be taken. I could've walked away but my mother's name would have been ruined. She may have betrayed me but I can't do that to her." He chuckled. "I guess I love her more than she's ever loved me."

"Don't say that about your mom," I said as I scooted in closer to him. "If your world is as ugly as you say it is, maybe she didn't have a choice. Her choices could've been taken away from her."

Sighing and reluctantly agreeing, he said, "Maybe. Sookie, don't doubt me. I'm going to get out of this and soon. I give you my word. After what happened in your office, once I'd learned of my daughter, things will change. They'll never see us coming."

I smiled at him. "No they won't," I said. "Do you ever see him … your dad?"

Eric shook his head no. "I haven't seen him since the day that my contractual obligation was carried out. I have cut him completely out of my life. There is no need to concern yourself with him anymore. He has already been taken care of. You and I are together now," he said rather abruptly.

"What does it mean when you say that he's already been taken care of?"

"It means that he's no longer an obstacle." From the look on his face, I knew that I wasn't going to get anything out of him … not now. He sat up a little and looked at the bedside clock. It was 4:00 am. "What time will she wake up?"

"She normally wakes at 9:00 on the weekends, maybe earlier … why?" I answered.

He lay back down on the pillow and said, "I have to go to the grocery store before she wakes up. I'm going to cook breakfast for my girls. What does she like to eat? Whatever she wants, I'm going to cook it for her. I want to have a huge breakfast waiting for her when she wakes up."

I sat up in bed and stared at him as I smiled. "Are you serious? You know how to cook?"

He looked at me as if he couldn't believe that I was surprised. "I'm an excellent cook. Bathroom?" he asked as he sat up in bed. There were three closed doors in my room; two closets and the bathroom. I pointed to the one in the center. He talked and talked as he floated from room to room. I closed my eyes and listened to every word that he said.

When I opened my eyes, he was standing over top me. "What are you thinking of?"

I opened my eyes and sighed. "Us," I answered. I propped myself upon my elbows. I then traced my finger over his shirt. "Will Freyda be a problem for you?"

Smirking, he answered, "No."

"When are you going to tell her that it's over?"

"She'll know soon," he said.

That wasn't an answer. "How soon?"

"Today," he answered. "I'm home now and I'm not going anywhere."