29

Quite Scandalous

Hi, y'all. I wanted to post this yesterday but work got the better of me. I hope that it's a good one. It gives a little bit on the backstory of Erica and pretty soon, we will find out the full story of Erica. I want to thank each of you for the reviews, favorites, and alerts. I plan on posting another chapter tomorrow if things go as planned and if no one calls me to come in to work.

Please, let me know what you think. The story idea belongs to me but the main characters belong to Charlaine Harris. Have a happy one!

I was sitting on the balcony on my chaise lounge and drinking a glass of wine as I thought of Alcide. I will never forget the look on his face when he told me that he knew that I didn't love him and that I wouldn't love him the way that he deserves to be loved. He's worthy of the love that I couldn't give to him. It's a truth that neither of us wanted to face. I don't love him like that. I'll never love him like that. Though he may have always known the truth about my feelings for Eric, it still doesn't make the hurt any less painful. He looked devastated. I didn't want to hurt him but I did. And I can't take it back.

Who am I kidding here?

I'm not able to give him what he wants and he deserves better than what I have to offer him. Alcide's a good man. He has a great heart and a wicked sense of humor. He has the most beautiful personality. He finds the good in almost anything and everyone. He's so easy to please. He is everything that any woman would be lucky to have. She would never need or want for anything. She would never have to wonder what she means to him because for every day that they are together, he will be sure to let her know. Any woman would want him; any woman but me.

I was hurt that he accused me of sleeping with Eric when I didn't do it. Wanting to and doing the deed are two different things. I would have never betrayed him like that. I should be mad as hell at him but I'm not because I couldn't be. People do and say things that they don't mean when they're hurting.

I've broken his heart and all he wanted was for me to love him and I couldn't do it.

I placed my glass of wine on the side table next to my chair before walking over to the balcony railing. I rested my arms on it and looked out into the cold, city night.

Talking to myself; which proves that I'm on the verge of going crazy, I said, "I'm not a bad person am I? Is that who I am now?"

I'm not some girl that makes it a habit of playing with the emotions of men. That's not what I do. I'm not some seductress. I've slept with two men my entire life. I've always thought of myself as honest. I didn't think that I was the type of woman that went around playing with the emotions of men. I've never hidden from Alcide what Eric means to me. I've always been up front with him and I've always been faithful. I wanted to sleep with Eric but I didn't do it. I couldn't do it. I have respect for Alcide and I have respect for myself. Am I a bad person?

"No," I said. "I'm not a bad person."

That doesn't mean that I wanted to hurt Alcide in any way.

"Oh, Ally," I said. "I'm so sorry."

I didn't know whether or not Alcide would ever speak to me again after today. I didn't want that. I've never wanted that. I was supposed to be his girlfriend but I here I am, in love with another man.

"I'm a heart breaker," I whispered. "I'm a horny, heartbreaking, shameless woman." I dropped my head down on my arms and moaned. "And an almost cheater," I gloomily added. "What has happened to me? Eric comes to town and I can't function. Sad, sad, sad. Gran would be so disappointed with me."

"What's up, Sookie?" Pam asked from behind me.

With my head still down, I waved at her before dropping my arm back down to my side. "Life's not fair. It's just not fair. I'm not supposed to be an almost cheater, Pam. I'm a good girl … well, I used to be. But now I'm not. I'm an almost cheater. I'm a horny, heartbreaking, shameless woman. And an almost cheater. What have I become, Pam? This is not how Gran raised me."

"What's wrong with you?" Pam asked. I could hear the smile in her voice. "Have you gone mad? Is that why you're out here talking to yourself?"

Turning to face her as I rested my backside against the balcony railing, I said, "I think I have. I truly believe that I have gone mad. As of this very moment, I'm fucking insane." Groaning as I walked to the chaise, I said, "I'm an awful, awful person. I am no good. I let my heart do all of the thinking for me and now I've lost my way."

Pam was beaming as she sat down in the chaise next to the one that I'd not too long ago vacated. "You fucked him, didn't you?"

I shook my head no. "No. I didn't sleep with him. But I wanted to. I really wanted to. His lips were so soft and he tasted so good." Something that sounded a bit like a moan escaped me.

"But you didn't," she said. "So, you're still a woman of virtue. As long as you kept your legs closed, you're fine."

"Which I did," I confirmed.

"So, you're fine."

"I guess."

"So, what's the problem?" she asked.

When I looked at her with a despondent and brooding look on my face, she knew. "Alcide," she said just as I pointed at her.

"Precisely," I said. Staring at Pam, I said, "I told him that Eric was back in town and that I'm still in love with him."

"It's the truth," she said. "You needed to tell him the truth. Outside of Eric, Alcide is one of the greatest guys you've ever dated. And besides, what happened today wasn't a secret. You've never hidden your true feelings from him. He knew what he was getting himself into when he began dating you." Frowning, she asked, "Why'd you tell him so soon?"

"Because he and Eric decided to play cock of the walk," I said. "They were being absolutely ridiculous. I had no choice but to tell him."

I went on to tell her what happened when the two men met. I told her how Alcide called me and Flynn 'my girls'. I told her of Eric's behavior when Alcide kissed me. I told her of how Eric kissed me in front of Alcide and how they almost began fighting over me. I had to tell her about Alcide questioning my faithfulness to him. "Alcide called me a liar. For a minute, he actually believed that I'd cheated on him. Can you believe that?"

With her brows furrowed, Pam asked, "Do you want me to kick his ass for you? I'll do it, you know? No one calls my best friend a liar and a cheater and gets away with it. What's the point in having a black belt and I can't use it?"

I sniggered. "That's alright," I said. "There's no need in kicking anyone's ass. He was just hurt. He didn't mean it … though it did piss me off when he said it."

"He'll get over it," she said. "People get dumped every day. It happens."

"Not to me, Pam. None of this was supposed to happen. Alcide and I were getting along really great. Things were really good between us but then Eric came back and now my world is as it's supposed to be and I feel guilty for it, Pam. I feel guilty because of Alcide and because I'm happy. I'm so happy that Eric is back. No one has ever made me feel as he does," I said. "Just being in the same room with him does something to me. Why do I love him so?"

Shrugging her shoulders, she said, "It's because you're supposed to. You're not meant to be with Alcide. You were made for Eric. You've always known that. That's why none of your other relationships have ever worked. We'll ignore the fact that you never tried to make them work but that's beside the point. You belong with Eric. You'll always belong with Eric. That's just the way it is. That's the way it always will be," she concluded.

"But he's married to Freyda," I replied. "I've broken up with Alcide and he's still married."

"He is but he isn't," Pam said. "She's nothing more than a business arrangement. He's obligated to his mom. You know that just as well as I do. That's the only reason he's with Freyda. You are the dimmest smart person I know. If you know Eric at all, you should know that he'd never purposely marry anyone that isn't you."

I walked over to the vacant seat and sat across from her. "Eric told me enough to pacify me but I need to know more. Tell me exactly what you mean by that."

"Why do you always prove my point, dimwit?" she asked as she rolled her eyes at me. "Because you're the only one he's ever proposed to."

I gave her the finger and said, "Kiss my ass, Pam. I wasn't talking about that, smart ass. I want to know about his mom. Tell me what you know about his mom."

"Erica messed up pretty bad back in the day," Pam said. "I don't exactly know what it was that she did but it had to have been pretty awful. From what I've heard, she made a promise to the Madden family to make up for that mistake. I'd asked daddy what the mistake was but he refused to tell me so I went to someone that I knew was into gossip."

I giggled. "Helena?"

"You guessed it," she said. "Mum doesn't know what the mistake was but she was willing to tell what she did know. She said that Erica didn't want to follow through with what she was supposed to do, so she killed herself. That's what the gossips are saying," she added with a whisper. "My guess is that she thought that they would forget about the whole thing." Pam shook her head no as she spoke. "She was sorely mistaken. That made them want Eric even more. And in our world, Sookie, the world of the obscenely rich, nothing is free. Everything and everyone has a price. When Dashell helped Erica she owed him and ta- da. Here we are," she ended.

"So Erica was in Dashell's debt, Victor's father?" I asked. "Is that why that snake Victor was always around?"

"Yes," she said. "Do you know him?"

I shook my head no. "I've met him twice and when I did meet him, he was a snake and a jerk but I don't know him."

"Lucky you," she said. "Anyway, when the Maddens helped Erica, Dashell wanted her first born son. She tried giving him other things but they didn't want anything else. They wanted her first born son. Obviously, she went along with it. She'd been pregnant several times before but she miscarried those babies. Eric just so happened to be the baby that made it to full term. Lucky for us but sad for him. He was birthed into a life of slavery."

Poor, Eric.

"Dashell wanted him because he wanted the families to merge. Because of their wealth and their business ventures, if those two families become one, they would be unstoppable and Dashell knew that. The Northmans are wonders in the business world. Because she owed a debt, she had to hire Victor on. That's why he hung around … to make sure that Erica kept her end of the bargain. The Maddens need the merging of the families."

Pausing for just a moment, Pam took my glass of wine from the table and finished it off. "Freyda's weak. She can't run a multi-billion dollar company on her own. She's inexperienced for Pete's sake. She doesn't know anything about running a business. She's nothing more than a pretty, yet plastic face for her grandfather's huge conglomerate. If she tried running the businesses on her own, she would be shark bait in minutes. Instead of learning the businesses when she was supposed to, she was out partying and doing everything that good girls aren't supposed to do."

My eyes widened.

"Everything," Pam whispered.

What has she done? My insides were giddy with anticipation because I couldn't wait to find out.

Pam continued on with her juicy news of the year. "Victor needs Eric because he's strong and he's very intelligent. With Eric's wealth and power standing with her, Freyda will have nothing to fear. No one will try to take the company away from her as long as they are together. Eric's a titan in the business world, Sookie." Smiling smugly, Pam said, "He's fucking amazing. He was made for this."

Though I'm sorry for the circumstances that he's been put in, I'm proud of the man that he's become. He could've let his life destroy him but it's only made him stronger. All of that is wonderful but why Eric?

"This still doesn't make sense to me," I said. "Why not give the company to Victor? There would be no need for Dashell to want Eric. He already had a son. He seems to have a head for business. From what I recall, he was working side by side with Appius. Why would his own father pass this huge corporation off to a twenty-five-year-old girl that doesn't know what she's doing?" I shrugged my shoulders as I added, "I don't get it."

"Simply put?" Pam asked.

"Why not?" I answered.

"He didn't trust Victor. He knew what his son was. Victor has always been a snake in the grass. He'd betray everyone involved and that includes his father. Victor hasn't a good bone in his body."

Flopping back onto my seat, I took in everything that Pam said to me. This was quite informative. I can't do much with it but it's start. I can't leave Eric to these circumstances. If he can't get himself out of this marriage on his own, I'll do all that I can to help him. I looked at Pam and asked, "So, she really means nothing to him?"

"Nothing at all," Pam confirmed. "And if that bitch is twenty-five, I'm sixteen. She hasn't been twenty-five in ten years."

I was soon catching flies. "Are you serious?"

"As a heart attack," Pam answered. "From what mum said, Freyda graduated with the Queen."

Pam's humor is priceless.

"She's actually thirty-five years old?" I asked. "How could Eric not know this?"

"It's Eric, Sookie," Pam said. "He knows.

"I can't believe it."

"Money is a wondrous thing, Sookie."

"Wow. I should've known that she wasn't twenty-five when I saw those crow's feet nesting around her eyes."

Pam laughed as she nodded. "Right? She's as wrinkled as my sheets."

I couldn't stop laughing.

Pam looked at me and winked.

Sitting up as my laughter died down, I asked, "What did Dashell do for Eric's mom to cause her to sign over her only son … her only child?"

Pam shook her head as she answered me. "I don't know but Eric was pissed when he found out that he had to marry Freyda. He didn't want to do it and he almost didn't but because it was for Erica, he did it. I can damn well guarantee that if Appius had asked, he wouldn't have done it at all. He would've let all of the Northman secrets be exposed."

"Even after what she'd done?" I asked. "Leaving him the way that she did? Leaving him to pay off her debt? He still wanted to protect her?"

"It doesn't matter," Pam answered. "She was his mum and he loved her. He feels that he's protecting her name."

"Where does Appius come in? Was the marriage between him and Erica arranged?"

"Surprisingly, no. It was a regular marriage," Pam said. "She wanted to marry him on purpose."

"Go figure."

"Right?" Pam agreed.

I then frowned. "Did Appius take Erica's last name?"

"Yep," Pam confirmed. "She refused to take the last name Ocella. Her father didn't like it either so Appius cut off his balls and took his wife's last name."

"Bitch," I muttered.

Pam laughed.

So, he is mine in every sense of the word … well almost. Once we get Freyda out of the picture he'll be all mine.

"Why'd you never tell me this stuff?"

Pam looked at me as if my head was about to explode. "You never wanted me to but I figured that since Eric's back in town, I'd find out what I could. I'd called daddy first but he would tell me nothing. He's very tight lipped when it comes to the personal information of others. That's why he's so great at what he does. Now, mum. She can't hold water. I called her Friday and she'd only just returned my call this evening. She was on a shopping trip. She was in the middle of a divine sale 'and I couldn't stop shopping to return your call, darling. I would have missed out. I couldn't let Victoria out shop me. It would be quite scandalous.'" She sounded just like her mother.

I laughed. And it was the truth. Helena never misses out on a sale or juicy news.

"Anyway, I told her about Eric's arrival to New York. She was shocked. She couldn't wait to tell me what she'd heard in the gossip circles. She said that she'd been waiting for us to ask her. She said that daddy told her to keep quiet but she never listens to him … or anyone else for that matter. I came over here to tell you and to pick up my sweetie pie." She winked at me and nodded.

"Thanks."

"Where is Flynn?" Pam asked. "I wanted to go to the movies today. She said that she wanted to see some stupid Lego movie that Cori went to see with her dad." Pointing over her shoulder as she stood up from her seat, she asked, "Is she in her room?"

She didn't wait for me answer her question. Pam went inside and started yelling out for my child. "Flynn," she yelled. "Come on. Let's go to the movies."

Following her inside, I said, "She's not here."

"Oh, is she with Grace?" Pam asked.

"No," I said. "She and Eric had a daughter/daddy day."

Pam turned to face me; her mouth had dropped wide open. "Get the fuck out of here! You let him take her out?"

"Yeah," I said. "I had to. Flynn would have it no other way. And they are getting along great. I figured that he may as well get to spend some time with his child. He knew about her so I had to come clean … not that I hadn't already planned on it."

Pam's mouth fell open from disbelief. "Get the fuck out of here!"

"No," I said.

"Who blabbed?"

"Freyda," I answered.

She shook her head and repeated, "Get the fuck out of here!"

"Yep."

"Un-fucking-believable," she mumbled. "Tell me."

I told her everything that happened yesterday at the office and last night, here at home. I told her of how I found out that he was married and how I'd invited him over so that I could tell him the truth. She ooh'ed and aah'ed in all the appropriate places. She clapped her hands and laughed when I told her about the little yelling fit that I'd had. What it all boils down to is that she was amazed … and proud of me.

"And you told him," she said. "I'm so glad."

"Me too. It's the best decision that I'd made. Flynn is the happiest I've ever known her to be."

Pam's eyes sparkled. "I love to see her happy."

"We're mothers," I deduced. "You should've seen his face when he first saw her. It was wonderful."

With her eyes even wider, she asked, "Here? He was here? You brought him here?"

"Yes. I just told you that I invited him over so that I could tell him," I said. "Where else would we go?"

"Wow," Pam said.

My sentiments exactly.

Frowning, she said, "I hope that Flynn was asleep. I'd hate for her to have heard all that bawling and shit that was going on. It's not a good look for a child to see or hear her parents crying."

It really wouldn't be as traumatizing as Pam is making it seem. Seeing us cry wouldn't give the child nightmares or anything like that. Maybe Flynn is right. Pam is a bit overly dramatic. "Yes, she was asleep. She woke up once because she wanted some water but she didn't see him. She never would've gone to bed."

Pam nodded as we walked into the kitchen. "Interesting," she said as she opened the fridge. Taking out the chicken salad and mayo, she said, "I'm assuming that things went fairly well since you let him take her out." She grabbed a plate from the cabinet and the bread from the bin and began making herself a sandwich as I talked.

"They did," I said. "I thought that he was going to hate me but he wasn't upset at all. He said that he understood. We have come to the conclusion that Appius was behind the whole fiasco of keeping us apart."

"So, what's the plan?" She took a huge bite of her overstuffed chicken salad sandwich.

"We're going to co-parent and take things day by day." Smiling, I said, "You should've seen him when he first saw her, Pam. I could see the precise moment that he fell in love with her. It was beautiful."

Leaning onto the counter as she ate her sandwich, Pam said, "I'll bet that he loved the box of memories."

"He did," I exclaimed as I cleaned up and put away Pam's mess.

"I guess the summer Sweden trip is cancelled."

I nodded. "For now."

"What about you two? How is that going to play out?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Slowly," I answered. "Or at least until he's no longer married."

"Are you okay with that?" She began to lick mayo and chicken from her hand.

"At first, I wanted to sleep with him … just to prove to Freyda that I could but I couldn't do it. I have a daughter. I need to set an example for her. We both need to do that. Eric and I are better than that. We're more than that. So we can wait. So yeah. I am okay with it."

She snorted before asking, "Is he?"

"He has to be. He doesn't really have much of a choice," I replied. "He said that he was."

After taking a huge bite of her sandwich, she stared at me and nodded. "I'm happy for you. It's good to see you happy like this."

I reached across the countertop and wiped a glop of mayo and chicken salad from the corner of her mouth. "Please, Pam," I said. "Don't talk with your mouth full. And stop cramming food into your mouth while you still have food in your mouth. We don't behave like that. We're ladies." I used the dishtowel to wipe the residue from my finger.

With her mouth full, she said, "No, I'm not."

My friend the comedienne.

After swallowing, Pam asked, "So, what are we going to do about Freyda? Do you want me to call my father? I'm sure that he'd be more than willing to help us out. He's always willing to help with the dirty work. No one will ever …"

"No!" I yelled. "You have to stop saying that. We are not calling your father for something like that. Don't even think that. Don't even offer it again," I warned her. "We are not going to do that. Eric and I are going to come up with something … something that doesn't involve dirty work. We don't need to call your father."

Pam shrugged her shoulders and said, "It was just a suggestion." She took another huge bite of her sandwich and smiled at me. "Do you want to go to the movies? I don't feel like going home right away. Copley's there and he's getting on my last nerve. I've never known for a man to cry as much as he does." She looked disgusted. "He's always fucking crying. He cries more than Flynn did when she was born."

"Sure, let's go," I said as I laughed. I walked out of the kitchen and down the hall to the living room. I grabbed my jacket from the coat rack. Glancing at her as she stood behind me, I asked, "What's going on with him?"

She me rolled her eyes and said, "He's upset that he's been served with divorce papers from wife number seven after he'd been caught cheating … again. I don't fucking understand that man's reasoning. He knew that she was going to file for divorce. It's not a surprise. She caught him in bed with another woman for pity's sake. He's always sticking his cock in some hole and then when he gets caught, he's always shocked at the consequence. He's a fucking idiot, he is."

I laughed at the sheer stupidity of Copley's thinking but Pam did not. If anything, she was scowling. "What? It was funny."

"Yes, it was but that's not the problem," she said as she shook her head. "You're wearing your workout clothes to the movies." Pam had the nerve to look appalled. "I'm not dressed as you are. That look is absolutely horrid."

I looked down at myself and said, "Well, I don't agree. I look fine. I didn't get to work out. I'm not sweaty or anything … and I match."

"You're in yoga pants, Sookie. And a sweatshirt." She pointed in the direction of my bedroom and said, "You need to go and change because I am not going to be seen out in public with you and you're looking like that. I'm a lesbian. I don't want people thinking that I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel for lovers. Now go and change."

I almost laughed until I realized that she was serious. "You're not serious?"

"I am," she proclaimed.

As I walked to my room, I threw my coat on the couch. "You're a real bitch when Copley comes into town," I said. "And if I may toot my own horn, toot, toot, I have had plenty of lesbians hit on me while I've been wearing yoga pants and sweatshirts." I smacked my ass at her as I walked away.

Just as I cut the corner to go into my room, with a mouth full of chicken salad, she yelled out, "They were desperate!"

Leave it to Pam to make things right with the world once again.