The relief Miyuki felt when she saw Tatsuya guiding their mother to the dinner table a little under an hour later was enough to make her go a bit weak, but she quickly recovered and began serving her meal to them. Miya and Tatsuya both praised her efforts, but Miyuki thought they were just being kind. She felt her food lacked flavor and wondered what Honami did differently to make it taste better.
To say culinary concerns were not the primary focus of her mind at this dinner would be an understatement.
Miya's breathing was back to normal and she was once again acting like her normal self, but none of that brought Miyuki any real comfort. When she asked her mother if she was feeling well, she got the expected short and affirmative answer. Any attempt to probe deeper into the matter resulted in nothing more than reassuring platitudes. She finally gave up when she realized that neither of her table companions planned to discuss it with her. She thought that if she could get Tatsuya alone again he might tell her more.
Miyuki, having surrendered on one front, tried to redirect the topic to their aunt's call earlier; but Miya instantly shut that attempt down with a scornful look. Miyuki didn't want to stress her mother out further, especially when she was still recovering.
Tatsuya, obviously supporting their mother's topic redirection preferences, attempted to engage Miyuki in conversation about their upcoming return to school. They had only had one semester of their first year in middle school under their belt so far. They had switched to a private middle school where none of their elementary school acquaintances attended on Hayama's, in other words Maya's, suggestion. This was mostly to help protect their secret identities, five years with the same classmates was deemed too much risk of exposure due to over familiarity.
There was also another reason to move schools completely. Tatsuya's superb academic skills were drawing too much attention to him from the faculty and staff at the elementary school. A completely different middle school unaffiliated with their previous school should take slightly longer for him to come to the attention of the faculty, but Miyuki suspected it wouldn't take them long to discover his extraordinary academic talents weren't receiving the normally expected parental encouragement.
Miyuki judged that the real problem wasn't Tatsuya's amazing academic scores, but their parents' odd refusal to allow him to participate in advanced courses and extracurricular activities, while their slightly less studious daughter received their unrestricted encouragement to do so.
"Well of course they'll think it's odd to treat us differently."
Miyuki, until this week, had never really thought about how odd most people would perceive their parents' radically different treatment of them being. Now she felt foolish for never realizing how oblivious she had been…about everything. It wasn't as if Tatsurou and Miya treated Tatsuya poorly in front of school staff, since that would have drawn considerable unwanted attention. They simply perplexed the faculty in not wanting to advance their superlative son while doing the opposite for their daughter.
They both gave the weak answer that they didn't want their two children to get too far apart in academics since they were in the same grade, but the extra stuff Miyuki got to do would obviously propel her far past her held-back brother had they been equally capable. Miyuki never got the impression from their teachers that they believed any of this. On more than one occasion a sympathetic teacher would grant Tatsuya access to more advanced materials despite their parents' wishes otherwise.
Miyuki suddenly wondered to herself why she had never reported on the teachers for that kind of breach to their parents.
"It's not like the 'old' me to keep that a secret, was it?"
Maybe she always had secretly felt bad for her Onii-sama?
Since Japan didn't have magic elementary or middle schools Miyuki and Tatsuya attended school with no other known magicians, and didn't advertise their special abilities. It had already been determined that both would apply and be accepted at the prestigious National Magic University Affiliated First High School in Hachioji. It was not only considered the best of the nine magic high schools in the country, but also happened to be the closest to their home. It was a relatively easy commute for them as well.
In a little more than two and a half years they would both apply and test for entrance to the school and be accepted. This was no wishful speculation on her part, the Family would ensure it came about that way.
Miyuki already knew that she was top in her age group for magic ability in the world. Barring something terrible happening, she would easily be accepted.
Tatsuya on the other hand was terrible at the magic skills examined in the magic high schools' entrance exams, but she knew that no matter how poorly he did on the exam, he'd still get in. He was her Guardian and wherever she went he would go, so it would all be arranged behind the scenes.
"But he can do so much else and so well! Stupid entrance tests just are poorly designed for his particular abilities. Maybe, he'll let me help him so he can get in on his own merits?"
She smiled brightly at him, which he returned awkwardly back to her as they finished their meals.
"We'll get you in despite their stupid tests! And without 'Family' help too!"
Dinner finished and Tatsuya helped their mother to the tea table near the patio door. Miyuki manually cleaned up the dishes, more to kill time and settle her mind than anything else. Tatsuya quickly came to help her but she shooed him off. Then to their mutual surprise Miyuki brought her mother and Tatsuya tea, and joined them at the table.
Sunset was fast approaching. The sun was getting low on the ocean horizon.
"Oh! Onii-sama, can we go down to the beach and watch it sink beneath the sea?"
Miya and Tatsuya both smiled at her, but she suddenly realized her mistake. They both frowned with confusion at her sudden head hanging and saddened expression.
"Forgive me mother, we will of course stay here with you."
Miya's face went from confusion to frustration. She turned away with an unsatisfied look as she spoke.
"I'm not an invalid Miyuki. I'm certainly not so weak that my twelve year old daughter has to stop having fun to take care of me."
Miyuki wasn't trying to insult their mother, but she wasn't comfortable leaving her alone after what she witnessed today.
"But…what if…that happens again? I may be useless, but I cannot take Onii-sama from your side under those circumstances."
Both Tatsuya and Miya looked at her sympathetically again.
"You certainly are not useless dear, and I appreciate your concern for me; but this is our vacation and I will not have it marred further by a little tiredness on my part."
Miyuki was about to refute her mother but a palm raise stopped her in her tracks. Then Miya and Tatsuya exchanged an unreadable glance.
"Since you now know about Elemental Sight, you must realize that there is no place from which Tatsuya cannot watch over us both with ease."
Miyuki displayed an "oh" face. She had indeed forgotten about her Onii-sama's wondrous ability.
He smiled and nodded to her in mild confirmation of their mother's assertion.
"Well…that is true…."
Again Miyuki looked doubtful though. Her mother moved to apply additional ease to her troubled daughter's mind.
"I'll sit on the porch and read while you two go sunset watching and stargazing afterwards. That way you can augment Elemental Sight with your own visual confirmation of my condition. Now go on."
A light hand wave was all it took from her to get them both moving. Soon both were walking down the beach and waiting for the magic moment the top of the sun would seem to physically move faster and drop below the liquid horizon of the East China Sea. They would turn around the second they were almost out of line of sight with their mother on the porch, and walk back the other way down the beach.
As with earlier today the place was abandoned save for them. Miyuki couldn't help but feel free with no eyes probing them save those of their mother.
"It's about to happen Miyuki."
She eagerly turned westward and grabbed his left hand in her right. Only the top part of the top half of the solar disk was visible now, then suddenly the sun seemed to move faster, and then it was gone.
"Oh!"
Miyuki always found that sight amazing. She could feel her Onii-sama's warm eyes looking down at her with a smile. He clearly got enjoyment out of her amazed reaction to what she saw. She turned happy eyes up to him.
"Wasn't it beautiful Onii-sama?"
He nodded lightly as he replied.
"Indeed it was, but not as beautiful as Miyuki."
His sudden compliment made her blush profusely as she turned away.
"Surely…..it was much more beautiful than Miyuki."
He shook his head at her contrite words.
"There is nothing in this world that will ever be as beautiful as Miyuki, especially when she smiles."
She had to turn away again in embarrassment.
"…..O-NI-SA-MA, stop picking on Miyuki so!"
He laughed lightly at her awkwardness.
"Miyuki has a face that would melt the cold heart of even the most implacable of gods."
A sudden pang of sadness struck Miyuki's happy heart with these words. She looked back at Tatsuya's warm smile with what she hoped was an unreadable expression. Their mother's admonish flowed into her mind again.
"The worst thing you can tell a God, is that he is a God."
She instantly threw her arms around her brother, who gently wrapped his left arm around her. She hoped he couldn't sense her worry for him through their embrace.
They watched the western seas as the orange sky and tinted clouds faded to increasingly darker shades of blue. After several moments they returned to just hand holding.
"I miss Honami-chan so much already."
Tatsuya turned concerned eyes back to Miyuki, clearly expecting to see sadness and tears. While her eyes were moist, her smile was still radiant as ever.
"I'm glad mother said she didn't want another Guardian. No one could ever replace her."
Tatsuya solemnly nodded back to her as he commented.
"It would be…awkward."
Miyuki smiled even brighter at him as she replied.
"And Onii-sama is all the protection we'll ever need!"
He smiled back at her, but the joy of that expression never reached his eyes. Miyuki found it hard to believe that someone as amazing as him could ever doubt himself. She silently admonished her mother for that, and vowed to work on his self-confidence issues.
"I can never repay her for what she has given me."
Tatsuya turned questioning eyes toward her.
"She cared for me, and taught me. She protected me, and comforted me. She was like a sister to me, and for that I can never repay her."
Tatsuya nodded in agreement.
"…..but….."
Then his eyes returned to her in curiosity.
"…..even though that alone would have been more than enough, she gave me even more."
His eyes widened at her assertion.
"Because all of the wonderful care and love she gave to me, she also gave unfettered to my beloved Onii-sama!"
Tears now flowed from her happy eyes.
"….Miyuki?"
She gently covered his mouth with her palm as she continued.
"She cared for YOU, and taught YOU. She protected YOU, and comforted YOU. She was like a sister to YOU too, and for that I truly can never repay her. I was blind before this week. I was a fool!"
He couldn't contain his concern for her now.
"Miyuki, you were not a fool…."
"YES, Miyuki was a great and stupid fool Onii-sama! Miyuki was blind! My Onii-sama is the most amazing person in the world!"
Tatsuya turned away in embarrassment.
"Miyuki, that certainly is not…"
She stopped him by using her hand to guide his chin and gently return his eyes to her.
"YOU most certainly ARE Onii-sama!"
She could feel her earnest and honest feelings flowing out of her and into him.
"You are truly amazing and Miyuki allowed jealous and fearful adults to determine for her how she should feel about her own brother! She was stupid and she will have to work very, very hard to at least try to make up for how horrible she was to her precious Onii-sama!"
He reached out to hold her forearms to comfort her.
"Miyuki, none of that was your fault."
"No Onii-sama! Ignorance is no excuse! Miyuki knew she was terrible to Onii-sama and she still acted poorly, she is truly repentant for her foolishness! She will make it up to you, this she swears!"
He hugged her to comfort her but she pushed away from him after a moment so that she could look him in the eyes again.
"But Honami-chan never wavered in her devotion to Onii-sama! She welcomed you as one of us on the first day! She treated you fairly and always looked after you! She was your REAL sister while I was an undeserving selfish brat!"
"Miyuki…..please. I don't feel that way about you. I never have."
She smiled brightly through her tears at him.
"Because you ARE truly amazing. Miyuki certainly doesn't deserve your love and understanding."
He shook his head emphatically at that.
"That's not true Miyuki."
But she gently covered his mouth with her fingers again.
"And for that, Miyuki is truly grateful to you for your patience with her Onii-sama; and she swears to be the imouto that is worthy of her Onii-sama from now on. Honami-chan stood in for me, even when I didn't deserve it, and I have learned from her example to mend my errant ways."
She reached up and grabbed him just below the shoulders.
"I can never repay her for being the sister to you that I should have been, but there is one more thing I am truly grateful to her for."
Tatsuya reached up and cupped Miyuki's elbows in his hands.
"She gave her life, for MY ONII-SAMA!"
Tears flowed from her eyes unchecked now.
He pulled her into him and she cried profusely into his chest. A tiny whisper barely reached his ears from her lips.
"She gave me a second chance."
He squeezed her tightly as she shivered in the ocean breeze, her hair whipping around their heads.
"She gave me back….my…Onii-sama."
After the sunset they sat on a beach blanket and looked up at the stars next to the tent they had put out earlier that day.
The dark blue sky retreated westward followed by purple and violet until finally dark night revealed even the faintest of stars. Like the previous night, no artificial lights obstructed the perfect heavens. The Milky Way stretched across the horizon unfettered.
Tatsuya would occasionally direct her attention to the stars and planets without need to look them up on a device. Miyuki reveled in his knowledge and attention. He explained the meaning behind the name of each constellation and which stars made them up.
Miyuki spent as much time staring lovingly at the darkened profile of her Onii-sama as she did at the night sky. The tide gently rolled in, but her feet never got wet despite the water coming just centimeters away. Had her Onii-sama perfectly measured their location up the sand to make sure of this? She had no doubt he had studied the tide charts with dutiful attention to detail.
On occasion she would direct a furtive glaze behind them, to the darkened porch where she knew a frail and beautiful woman was watching them. Each time her Onii-sama would smoothly say to her the following.
"I still have my 'eyes' on mother."
Each time she'd smile and return to watching him and the sky as they explored the heavens together.
Except for Tatsuya's words next to her, the sounds of winds and waves protected Miyuki's ears from far more distant sounds, just as the darkened world protected her eyes from other sights.
If not for those distractions then Miyuki might have heard the sobs and seen the tears that flowed from the eyes of that frail and beautiful woman back on the porch as she watched her two children; and wished she had done everything differently a long time ago. Neither could know the pain in her heart as she ripped herself apart for how she had failed the people she loved the most, especially these two.
Only one other person on this beach could "see" and "hear" that woman's anguish. He had no intention to ever mention that to either of these two women that were his closest relatives.
Though he thought to himself that surely one of them had to know he was watching her.
Miyuki held her Onii-sama's hand as they left the beach and returned to the villa.
Miyuki had elected, in the perfect atmosphere they had shared together on the beach, not to ruin the mood by probing Tatsuya for answers to their mother's weakened condition. She had judged that that could wait till a less "perfect" moment.
Once inside they found Miya had also relocated to the interior, her paperback book in her left hand.
"Did you enjoy yourself?"
Miyuki smiled and nodded.
"Yes mother, WE did."
Miya was at no loss as to why her daughter had emphasized the plural noun in her statement. To Miyuki's surprise Miya turned gentle eyes and words towards her brother.
"Well Tatsuya, did you also enjoy yourself?"
Tatsuya was momentarily surprised to have been asked, but per his way, he recovered quickly.
"It was….very pleasant."
A typically simple and concise answer, with no superfluous details. Miya and Tatsuya both seemed satisfied by that, but Miyuki felt the need to embellish more.
"Onii-sama showed me the constellations and explained the origins of their names to me. He pointed out the significant stars and planets as well. He told me all about the Milky Way and how we all move through the heavens."
She then turned an adoring smile to her slightly embarrassed brother.
"He's an excellent teacher, and very smart as well."
"I see…."
Miya was smirking at Miyuki's statement a bit, but then she shocked both her children.
"Tatsuya certainly does not disappoint."
It took both of them a minute to process what they had just heard. Both looked towards her expecting her to add on something like "…in that way", but no conditional phrase ever came.
Miyuki and Tatsuya exchanged surprised glances. Neither could believe that their mother had so unconditionally praised the son that up till this week she had barely acknowledged was alive. For her part Miya went right back to looking at her book as if she'd done nothing odd at all.
Miyuki suddenly felt a warmth growing in her chest. She had learned this week that their mother secretly loved her son intensely, but also learned why she felt it was vital for her to treat him indifferently.
To hear unfettered praise for her Onii-sama from their mother in his very presence nearly drove her to happy tears again. She raised her hands together and clutched her chest with a radiant smile beaming forth.
It was the exact opposite reaction from the object of that praise. He looked on their mother with grave concern. Miyuki thought that he was just confused since he wasn't used to Miya's praise.
"Madam, are you still feeling alright?"
Miyuki instantly reproached him gently for lapsing back into the old terminology.
"Mother, Onii-sama!"
He nodded his contrition towards her.
"Yes, of course…..mother, do you need anything?"
The concern still radiated from him.
Miya seemed as if she had just heard a strange noise. She looked at her children, with their diametrically opposite expressions, and realized something was amiss. Then sudden realization that she had "slipped" spread across her face. She quickly turned back to her book with mild irritation showing.
"No, I'm perfectly fine."
Her tone was less than friendly, but Miyuki could see her awkwardness showing in her eyes.
"Are you certain mother?"
Tatsuya was still concerned. Miyuki wondered if he was seeing something in Elemental Sight that was troubling him. She also started to grow concerned.
"Yes, I'm fine."
Miya affected disinterest again, as if nothing odd had ever happened. Then she suddenly looked at her daughter with an irritated glance, which only made Miyuki smile even more. Miya turned from her gaze with even more irritation showing, which only served to please Miyuki further.
"I see the real you momma!"
Miyuki couldn't help but be happy.
Then a sudden revelation came over her. She fought not to show it on her face or risk ruining her chance. Once she felt she could do so without flaw, she asked her mother a question.
"Have you bathed yet mother?"
Miya directed an instantly suspicious look at her daughter.
"No, why do you ask?"
"Well, since it's already so late, I was thinking…..we could share a bath…..since the tub here is almost as big as the one at home."
Miyuki had said this with what she hoped was a very innocent expression. Now she noticed Tatsuya also looking at her with an odd expression too.
It had been more than three years since Miyuki had taken a bath with her mother. Miyuki had been rather obstinate in declaring back then that nine years olds were too old to be taking baths with their mothers, and that she was big enough to take her own baths alone. The result was that instead of bathing with her mother she then had Honami watching her bathe until she entered middle school just months before. It was a compromise of sorts, but not the result Miyuki was hoping for either.
It had been a rather early example of Miyuki standing her ground and not yielding; and since both had witnessed "the struggle" first hand it was only natural both were now equally surprised at her sudden reversal.
Yet where Tatsuya was simply surprised, their mother looked intensely suspicious instead.
"…is that so?"
The doubt pouring out of her mother's mouth and expression almost made Miyuki start to squirm.
Then Miya suddenly relented.
"Very well."
Miyuki couldn't believe how easy that had been. Clearly, by his next words, her brother seemed to indicate that he didn't feel it had been hard enough.
"Mother, I would not recommend a hot bath due to the potential for heat exhaustion."
Miyuki fought hard not to express her sense of betrayal at his sudden unhelpful recommendation.
Miya seemed unperturbed.
"Would a luke-warm bath be alright with you Miyuki?"
Miyuki nodded as she responded.
"It has been a very hot day, something less warm than normal would be refreshing, I think."
She didn't have to lie at all by saying this. It probably would be refreshing to take a less than near scalding bath as was normal.
"Very well, Tatsuya, go and….."
"I can draw a bath for us mother."
She smiled back benignly at Miya.
"There's no need to burden Onii-sama with such mundane tasks."
Miya cocked her left eyebrow at her daughter. She clearly wasn't convinced of Miyuki's innocent intentions.
"Very well, proceed."
Miyuki immediately went to the bath and filled it with warm water. She then showered up and entered the bath to await her mother.
Miya came shortly, showered, and entered the bath after Miyuki stood to help her in.
Once they were both settled in, they relaxed and sat there silently, allowing the water to sooth away their aches and cares. If Miya could sense her daughter's rising anticipation she expertly ignored it.
After a long silence had developed, Miya finally opened her eyes and smiled at her daughter.
"Well dear, you have me alone as you had planned, is there something you want to discuss?"
Miyuki had known Tatsuya would take this opportunity to perform a patrol of the area. She also knew that the one place he was sure not to use his amazing eyes on them would be while they were in the bath together, not that she thought he would indiscriminately use his magic just to eavesdrop on them anyway.
Miyuki looked back at her mother with growing tension, but responded shortly after.
"Are….Bath Time Rules in effect?"
Miya's smile increased with her daughter's words.
"Well it's been a long time and we are certainly in a bath."
Her smirk increased as she continued.
"I knew one day that technique would turn on me, oh well. Yes, Bath Time Rules are in effect."
Miyuki sighed in relief then, and prepared herself for her first question. After a bit of working up on her part, Miyuki finally spoke.
"What was…..what is that….that magic you used on Onii-sama?"
Miya closed her eyes and leaned back with a slight smile now on her face. After a relaxing sounding sigh she answered languidly.
"I will not tell you its name. I will tell you noting about its activation either. I have, since discovering it, systematically worked to find all sources of knowledge about it, to collect it in my knowledgebase alone, and then to destroy all other sources of info on it."
She looked very seriously back to her daughter.
"It is my intention that that particular magic will die with me, never to be reborn again."
Miyuki's eyes widened at her mother's words.
"….why?"
Miya smirked lightly back towards her.
"It's too dangerous in the wrong hands, and the cost to use it is far too high."
Miyuki felt an instant dread in her heart.
"….and the cost to use it is too high?"
Miya nodded as she replied.
"You saw that it was painful for me to use, right?"
Miyuki flinched at that response, and solemnly nodded back.
"….what else does it cost the user?"
Miya looked sadly back at her daughter.
"…too much, Miyuki."
It wasn't an answer, but it answered so much. Miyuki looked down in sadness. She now knew this magic was causing permanent damage to her mother in some form.
Miya brought Miyuki out of her darkening inner thoughts by elaborating further on the magic.
"It is an ancient and obscure magic from the Continent. I discovered it while researching MI magics that might prove useful in dealing with your brother's unique problems. I recognized that it would provide the most effective relief to one of his major post-MI surgery side-effects, while causing him the least amount of pain or damage, and I judged that the side-effects for me were worth it, FOR ME."
Miyuki looked back at her with hooded eyes.
"And what does it do, exactly?"
Miya smirked at her.
"I think you already have a good idea yourself, don't you?"
Miyuki pouted back to her with a nod.
"It takes away his memories."
Miya sadly nodded back to her.
"Yes, but why would I take away his memories?"
Miyuki's pout was the same as before.
"Because…it's a memory that includes an emotion with it?"
Miya solemnly nodded her affirmation.
"Don't you have a better question to ask me now?"
Miyuki pondered this for a few moments before formulating the question she thought her mother wanted to answer.
"How does Onii-sama have emotions not related to me?"
Miya nodded with a satisfied smile. She seemed to be proud that Miyuki reached that conclusion, but Miyuki thought it was too obvious to be praiseworthy.
"How indeed?"
Miya smiled indulgently at her daughter.
"He's not supposed to be able to have emotions not related to you, right?"
Miyuki could only nod her agreement. That has always been her understanding of her Onii-sama's emotional limitations.
"What do I always say about the human mind?"
Miyuki could easily answer that question. It was one of her mother's favorite saying.
"The human mind is a wondrous and mysterious device that we may never fully understand."
Miya nodded in reply, then she spoke softly again.
"And what am I?"
This question took Miyuki off her guard. When it was clear that Miyuki didn't understand the question Miya added it in for her.
"I am a human, and what are humans?"
It took Miyuki a moment, but she blurted out the answer the moment she had it.
"….flawed creatures?"
"Precisely my dear."
Miya smiled lightly back across the water to her daughter.
"I am a human, you are human, even 'The Great Onii-sama' is human."
Her mild chiding of Miyuki's new-found admiration for "Onii-sama" was more teasing than serious, which resulted in Miyuki mildly blushing.
"And what does that make all of us?"
Miyuki only pondered for a moment before the answer.
"We're all…flawed creatures."
"Yes, and flawed creatures not only make mistakes, but they also never reach perfection. Since magicians are also humans that means that their magics are also less than perfect."
Miyuki seriously absorbed her mother's words.
"That means…the Mental Interference surgery you preformed on Onii-sama…..was….."
"Not perfect, to say the least."
Miya smiled benignly at her pondering daughter.
"You like gelatin, right?"
Miyuki cocked her right eyebrow at her mother's sudden topic change.
"…..yes."
Miya smirked a little at Miyuki's obvious frustration.
"And you know how it's made?"
Miyuki nodded back, still perplexed.
"The human mind is a lot like a bowl of gelatin."
Now Miyuki looked back at her mother with confusion on her face.
"Especially when it is a young mind like Tatsuya and yours. Solidified gelatin, much like an adult brain, can still be sculpted into different 'shapes'; but the same contents are still there. It's still either cherry flavored or mint flavored, no matter how it is cut, it will still 'taste' the same. In other words an adult brain can still learn, but things like personality are already generally well defined and permanent. Most adults never change 'who they are', simply because they can't anymore. They are, who they are."
Miyuki had seen this in her real life experiences with adults, they tended to be creatures of routine who preferred things the way they are accustomed to. Yet she thought her mother was getting at something deeper than just that particular example.
"When you first make gelatin you start with a flavored liquid. This is much like a baby's brain. The 'ingredients' are already there, but it has yet to take a 'shape'. In fact you can pour it into any mold and so long as it is not disturbed it will eventually solidify and take the shape that mold applies to it."
Miya now looked at her daughter very seriously.
"Once the gelatin powder is stirred in, and the combination placed in a cooler; the process of solidification begins. This represents what happens as the baby grows and learns and becomes a toddler, then an adolescent, and finally a teenager. Much like the steps of becoming an adult brain, the steps in making solidified gelatin require consistency and patients."
Miya smiled again as she continued.
"If you are able to watch the gelatin harden you will notice that certain parts of it harden faster than others; much like a child learns to walk and speak before they can do calculus or ride a bicycle, or eventually operate heavy machinery like cars. If, during the middle of this process you disturb it, or even pour it in a new and different shaped container; depending on how solid it is already it may never properly form into what you want it to become."
Miya's expression became serious again.
"While both you and your Onii-sama now have mostly 'solidified' brains, there's still a lot of 'fluidity' in there."
Miya then looked away with those faraway eyes she possessed.
"Six years old was already far too late to apply the Artificial Magic Calculation Area to your brother's brain. Magic is one 'ingredient' in the 'liquid' that makes up the initial composition of a human mind. In other words it is something you are born with, but like any talent a baby doesn't possess the knowledge yet to use that talent. However, even Tatsuya started showing his ability to use his talents as a toddler."
Miyuki could see a sadness in Miya's eyes.
"Still, I waited, hoping I could find some other MI magic that would be…better…than the surgery. Six years old was almost too late."
Then serious eyes bore down on Miyuki again.
"I told you yesterday that what I did to Tatsuya was much more sophisticated than what I had done to Maya. Instead of taking the emotions from his memories, I applied permanent upper and lower emotional thresholds to his ability to have emotions. If you visualize emotions as waves, I applied a low and high pass filter to his emotional wave pattern."
Seeing this analogy was confusing to Miyuki, she tried a simpler model.
"Think of big ocean waves, they're scary, right?"
Miyuki nodded to this question.
"Your Onii-sama, in most things, can neither have emotional troughs or peaks. His mind, like a boat in the seas of emotions, will never plunge into a trough of depression or despair, nor crest a peak of love or anger. Except for you, he will never be lead off course or through rough emotions."
Miyuki hung her head down in sadness.
"…..except for me."
Miya sighed heavily at her daughter's sadness and continued onward to dispel her gloom with a smile at her.
"We have already discussed why it is important that his emotions for you be normal, right?"
Miyuki looked up with sudden determination blazing in her eyes.
"Yes mother, I will protect him."
"I know dear."
Then Miya became serious again.
"But to make that special place in his emotions just for you, I had to apply a….well, for lack of a better term, a 'cut' in my filter. And anywhere you make a cut, you risk a tear forming. A crack in the wall so to speak."
Miya smiled somewhat sadly now at Miyuki.
"This brings us back to what we previously have discussed. The human mind being mysterious and wondrous, my magic having flaws like any other magic, and the 'liquidity' of young minds."
Miya leaned back and sighed before she continued.
"Tatsuya's mind, still being young and 'fluid', can still, despite my best efforts, find ways around my magic filter in his emotions. The best results for my MI surgery would have been seen in an adult mind, one already formed; but even then the mind finds ways around artificial barriers. It simply is too wondrous for any other mind to comprehend fully."
She looked away again as she spoke.
"Once he reaches his late teens, I think his mind will be 'solidified' enough to not need me using that magic to take his memories. Yet, as we have seen this week, he is not quite there yet."
She then turned serious eyes on Miyuki once again.
"That's why when I found the ancient magic I used to remove his memories, it was almost a perfect solution for him."
Miyuki looked back with a skeptical expression.
"Before I found that magic, had I used my inherent MI magic on him to take his emotional memories; I would have had to take almost an entire three year block of memories from him. My own magic is that imprecise."
Miyuki was stunned by this revelation, but to her confusion Miya laughed lightly back.
"That's much better than when I was was your age. That's why I elected to take only your aunt's emotions and not her memories. Had I gone after everything it literally would have been EVERYTHING. Only three years is a major improvement, I assure you."
Her mirth faded quickly as she continued.
"This ancient magic, allows me to become like a video editor. I can see Tatsuya's recent memories, identify the ones attached to strong emotions, cut them from his memory, and then splice his memory back together in a way that reduces his need to question the differences. No need to take years from his mind, no need to reset his mind to zero. Had I had this magic as a child, so many things would have been different. I could have simply taken only the bad memories from your aunt's mind."
Miya had an expression of regret, but Miyuki's expression was borderline depression.
"…but the costs?"
Miya looked up with sad eyes at her daughter's quiet question.
"Had I simply took all your brother's emotions, like I did your aunt, there would have been no repercussions for me. That level of magic is normal for my abilities."
Her expression grew much sadder as she continued.
"But, the MI surgery I performed on your brother was much more complicated and intense. You remember I was bed-ridden for two weeks afterwards?"
Miyuki sadly nodded that she remembered.
"That was a one-time use magic."
Stunned and widen eyes greeted her mother's shocking words.
"….one time….use?"
Miyuki heard the desperation in her own voice. In magic circles the term "one time use magic" was synonymous with saying that it was a magic that permanently damaged the user. Sometimes to the point of death. Honami's efforts the day before fit the extreme definition of a "one time use magic" perfectly.
Miya extended her hands out towards her daughter, who grabbed hold and allowed her mother to pull her into her embrace on her left side.
"I certainly can never use that magic again, not that I would want or need to. Your Onii-sama is and was a special case."
Miyuki snuggled into her mother's side and tried not to let her see the fear she felt inside.
"But…..what about Gate, can you use it still?"
Gate was Miya's signature magic. It literally caused a person's mind to temporarily turn off. Miyuki also knew it was the last option to stop Tatsuya if he ever truly lost control.
The last acceptable option for her, since the "ultimate" option was her own super-powered version of Gate….Cocytus.
But Cocytus had a very big and terrible flaw. Where Gate was temporary and left no lasting damage, Cocytus was just far too powerful.
If she ever had to use Cocytus on her Onii-sama, he'd never wake up again.
And that was completely unacceptable to Miyuki.
She felt and heard her mother sigh hard before responding.
"Right now, today, while I could easily use Gate on a non-magician, or even a somewhat normal magician. With someone with high Interference ability like your brother…."
Miya shook her head sideways in obvious discomfort at her thoughts.
"…in my current state, I'd be too weak to overcome his Interference. After this week, I might never get to the level needed to break his Interference again. He only improves with time, as I decline."
Miyuki directed stunned eyes again at her mother.
"….but, but I….."
Miya stroked Miyuki on the head gently and pulled her quaking body into her own.
"This was the worst week so far for your Onii-sama by a wide margin; and we got through it successfully without using Gate or Cocytus, now didn't we?"
Miyuki nodded as she continued to tremble.
"But…..but that's because you used that ancient magic, who's price is too high to use, right?"
Miya continued to stroke Miyuki's head as she responded.
"That wouldn't have worked in the heat of the moment. Had he made a rash decision, well, it's not a 'quick draw' magic like Gate. Still, we didn't have to use it. That mind of your Onii-sama is solidifying well. In a few years he will be almost an adult and so long as we can limit…..things like yesterday, he will become strong enough to resist most emotional 'leakages' on his own, without us having to go to unpleasant extremes."
Then Miyuki heard Miya mutter as if she were alone.
"Still, a few more years would have been useful."
Miyuki pulled back and stared terrified at these words. Realizing such, Miya moved quickly to change topics.
"You realize Cocytus is a more powerful form of Gate, right? That I concentrated my magic into you as you grew inside me in the hope that you would become a superior MI magician in comparison to myself?"
Miyuki timidly nodded back.
"I told you that now I can erase three years of memories; where before, at your age, I could only take all memories from your aunt, or all emotions."
Her warm smile settled her daughter down as she continued to explain.
"That means, that as my mind solidified and I practiced more, I learned to use that magic by degrees."
Miyuki blinked mild confusion towards her mother.
"That means as that brain of yours solidifies and you gain experience, you too can learn to use Cocytus by degrees."
Miyuki shook her head in denial.
"But…you always said…..if I had to use Cocytus on Onii-sama…I should never hold back!"
Miya looked away with some shame showing on her face, a rare sight that heightened Miyuki's agitated state.
"Well….since you didn't know before about how powerful Tatsuya's Interference ability was, I couldn't afford for you to hold back if the time ever came for you to act against him. He's simply that powerful."
Miyuki was mortified and angry. She stood up in the water and stared down at her mother in horror.
"But…Onii-sama…..I would….I…."
Miya reached gently for Miyuki's arm and pulled her back down into a seated position.
"You already know why it may be necessary to use Cocytus on him. I don't intend to justify my actions in not explaining this before now. My reasons are now known to you and are valid. He cannot be allowed to use Material Burst in anger. You know this."
Miya seemed agitated at Miyuki, but Miyuki suspected she was trying to cover for her own sense of shame at deceiving her daughter.
Then Miya's expression went warm again as she reached out to hold Miyuki's hands.
"But now you are old enough to begin learning how to use Cocytus in degrees, and it will make it more useful not only for Tatsuya but other situations as well. It contains all that Gate is within it and more. You have already mastered the 'more' part, and I will teach you how to master the Gate portions as well. We'll start on it as soon as we get home."
Miyuki was still unhappy, but the relief she felt knowing now that her ultimate innate magic wasn't just for killing brought her great relief, especially where her Onii-sama was concerned.
They sat there pleasantly letting the water sooth them for several more minutes before Miyuki formulated another question.
"What happens…to the memories you take from Onii-sama?"
Miya cocked an inquisitive eyebrow at her daughter before replying.
"The precision of that magic comes at the cost of having the user take on the memory and the emotions as if it were our own. This process not only results in intense physical pain, as you have seen, but weakens me physically and magically. While I can recover from it, it takes more time every time I use it."
Miyuki looked away with a pensive look.
"So, now you remember Onii-sama's emotion and memories like they were your own?"
Miya sadly nodded back to her daughter.
"Yes dear, I relive my son's emotions as if they were my own. It was if I was there on that hill, watching Honami die and not able to save her."
"OH! Momma!"
Miyuki rushed to comfort her, but Miya stopped her with a delicate palm raise.
"No dear….I took these from your brother willingly. I accept the consequences with full knowledge. This is one of the least things I can do to help my son."
Miyuki sat back down in the water, defeated.
"Smile Miyuki."
Miya smiled at her as she lightly demanded the same back from her daughter.
"Our Tatsuya is well and safe because of a little pain for me. It's not too high a price for a mother. One day you will understand, as you hold your own children in your arms, and do a much better job for them than I could ever do for your brother."
Miyuki forced a smile onto her face as she nodded back.
Yet in the back of Miyuki's mind there was still the fear. The fear that her mother was holding something terrible back from her. Miyuki had all the evidence she needed to piece together the truth that caused her so much fear. The horrible truth she knew was waiting ahead of them, but that her mother still concealed from her.
"….momma?"
She could bear it no longer.
"Yes my darling?"
Her words were too smooth, her breathing too perfect. It was as if Miya already knew what her daughter was going to ask her.
"Are you…."
She was fighting back tears as she tried to push the dreaded question out of her mouth.
"….dying?"
Miyuki braced herself for the dreaded answer. A light sigh escaped Miya's mouth. It was as if she relaxed at the sound of Miyuki's voice.
"My smart and beautiful girl. You are way too cleaver for your own good."
Miyuki inhaled deeply to prepare herself for the coming argument as she tried to fight her mother for the truth, but Miya's words came forth first.
"I have had to do many, many terrible things to fix the sin I committed against your brother. Of having left him vulnerable to the whims of another's desires for vengeance. Things I have done that I am certainly not proud of."
Miyuki didn't understand what Miya meant by 'another's desires for vengeance'; but the intense sadness Miya's eyes poured into her daughter with the words 'things that I am certainly not proud of' almost made Miyuki feel as if she were actually talking about Miyuki being one of those 'things'.
"But sacrificing some of my life force to protect my son is not one of those things."
Miyuki inhaled hard at these words as she began to sob uncontrollably.
"MOMMA NO!"
Miya smiled as warm tears also fell from her eyes, she reached out for her little girl who rushed into her arms crying and sobbing out of control.
Miya stroked her hair to sooth her devastated daughter.
"It will not be tonight my dear, or tomorrow. You and I still have lots of time together."
Miyuki squeezed her hard. Probably harder than she should squeeze her weakened mother, but Miya didn't complain.
"But since the moment I decided to give my boy the Artificial Magic Calculation Area, I have known that this body's days had been dramatically shortened. But for his sake, and the sake of the world, a shortened lifespan is a small price to pay for my numerous sins."
Miyuki let out a particularly intense cry of mental anguish then.
Then sudden static crackled as the intercom to the bathroom came to life.
"Please pardon the interruption, but is everything alright?"
Miyuki, tear streaked eyes looking surprised at her mother, stood at the sudden sound of her Onii-sama's voice.
Miya, with a knowing smile at her daughter, replied effortlessly to her son's question.
"We're fine Tatsuya. Just having a bit of a cry."
Miyuki knew that the way her mother said this would make her Onii-sama think she was crying for Honami's sake.
"Are you alright Miyuki?"
Still, even his own mother's words were insufficient for him. Only his imouto's reassurances of her condition would do.
Miya knowingly nodded to her daughter. Through her emotional strained voice Miyuki responded.
"I'll be alright Onii-sama. I promise."
Silence hung in the air then. Had he not heard her?
Then his voice replied after the long pause.
"Very well. I will remain close incase either of you need me."
The intercom went dead and Miyuki sank slowly back into the water beside her mother.
"He ran here, the moment he detected you crying."
Miyuki turned her eyes in astonishment at her mother's assertion. Miya smiled back at her.
"You thought we were alone, and in our words to one another we were; but even as a toddler, once he mastered Elemental Sight, he has never once, no matter how difficult the situation he has been in at the time, taken his special eyes off his imouto, or his mother."
Miyuki couldn't believe this, but her mother continued.
"He has watched us for as long as he has been capable of doing so. It's not his active Elemental Sight, he only uses that when needed, but his attachment to Eidos is so strong that he can 'see' or perhaps better described as 'feel' us even while he sleeps."
Miyuki couldn't wrap her mind around this ultimate form of constant vigilance.
"He did this long before I gave him the MI surgery. He has always been concerned for us, especially you. He would often escape his confinement to sit outside our doorways at night. I had to use Gate on him so I could carry him back to his bed, but as often as not as soon as Gate's effects ended he was back beside your doorway. Honami found him there many mornings."
Miyuki started crying again, and Miya gently stroked her hair again to reassure her.
"No matter how poorly we treated him, he still worried for our sakes. He has always been that way. For some reason, even when he had all the same emotions as before, he still….I suppose for lack of a better word for it….loved us, no matter how harsh I was with him."
Miya turned away slightly and a few tears escaped her eyes.
"I certainly didn't deserve or earn that level of devotion from him. He had every reason to hate me back then."
Miyuki nuzzled inside Miya's arms.
"Does Onii-sama know….that you're…"
She couldn't say that horrible word again, not now.
Miya stroked her head gently.
"He has known since he woke up from the surgery. Hayama said that the first words he spoke once he woke and confirmed our locations in…Eidos was…"
To Miyuki's amazement Miya swallowed hard and fought not to sob. And then before her frightened and astounded daughter's eyes Miya began to sob openly.
"…he said….he was…unworthy of such a….a sacrifice…FROM MADAM!"
Miya buried her face in her hands and let go of all the pain she had felt all these years. Miyuki couldn't believe what she was seeing. She moved quickly to wrap her arms around her sobbing mother.
"It's alright momma. We're alone. You can let it go now."
Miyuki held her crying mother as they both sat there in the slowly cooling off water.
"Mother, are you certain you are alright?"
Tatsuya's words surprised them both this time, then Miya began to try to compose herself to respond. Miyuki could see that her mother was trying to apply a false mask. To reply to her son in a cold manner when her heart ached to reach out and hold her beloved boy in her arms.
Miyuki leaned into her mother's ear to whisper words to stop the laborious efforts to compose herself.
"Let me do, what I was born to do."
Miya turned concerned, tear stained eyes at her daughter, who through her own tears smiled happily at her mother.
"To protect my Onii-sama…..with love….for both of us."
Miya stroked her daughter's hair with a sad smile and nodded.
"We are alright Onii-sama. Mother and Miyuki will be out in a little bit."
She knew she had put all the joy that her Onii-sama made her feel into her words for him. If that didn't reassure him nothing could.
After another long pause he responded.
"Of course. Should I prepare tea?"
Miya and Miyuki smiled as she responded.
"Absolutely not Onii-sama! That simple task is Miyuki's to perform."
In the long pause that developed as he apparently tried to formulate a response, a surprising sound came from her mother beside her. As Miyuki looked down in shock, Miya was covering her mouth with her hand and desperately trying to surpress her….
"…laughter?"
And then Miyuki, without any control of her own, helplessly joined in her mother's sudden outburst; which only served to loosen the final bonds of Miya's already failing attempts to stop laughing.
From the other side of the intercom there was dead silence as the listener heard these two laughing without reserve. In obvious shock at this unexpected turn of events, he finally responded in what could only be complete bewilderment for him.
"Um…very well. I'll get off the intercom….then."
And the line went dead as the two women tried to regain their composure and wipe tears of laughter from their eyes.
"I can't believe what I just did, in front of my daughter as well. It seems like years since I've laughed so hard. Hysterical crying followed by hysterical laughter. I've certainly set a bad example for you tonight."
"Don't say that mother!"
Miyuki's emphatic declaration drew her mother's immediate attention.
"After all mother….we are just humans."
At her daughter's unfailingly bright smile, Miya couldn't help but smile back. She reached across and pulled her daughter into her embrace again.
"Perhaps we all are humans after all my dear."
She stroked Miyuki's hair as they sat in the cooling off water of the once warm bath.
"He will never betray you."
Miyuki turned to look at her mother's eyes.
"He will never fail you. He will always protect you, and he would gladly die for your safety."
Miyuki felt sadness well up in her again.
"But rest assured my dear, you will have earned that level of love from him. You will never betray him. You would willingly die for him. You will never fail him either.
Miyuki had already learned to feel these words in her own heart this week, but she couldn't explain how her mother could so easily understand her daughter's heart.
"The two of you will hold each other tightly and protect one another from the terrors of this horrid world."
Miya pulled her daughter into her embrace.
"And together you two will defy this cruel world."
Miyuki didn't completely understand her words, but they calmed her even so.
"And perhaps hope and love alone, will be enough for my children to endure the trials ahead?"
Miyuki had no hesitation in her reply.
"We will mother, this I promise to you."
Miya stroked her head gently.
"I know you will my love. I know you both will."