"Geez, Uhura, whaddaya getting so upset about? I just asked - GETHEROFFME!"
The top half of Uhura pinned the top half of Donal to his seat while she bitch-slapped him silly. Scotty held her bottom half for dear life.
"McCoy - don't just stand there, hypo her!"
Grabbing his ever-present hypo, McCoy reached over to press it to her leg simultaneous to Uhura's leg-freeing kick.
Scotty lost his grip and his consciousness when the hypo buried itself in his neck and not in Uhura's thigh. The sleeping Scot melted onto the aisle floor, peaceful as a new babe.
"Scotty! Scotty! Wake up, man, I need some help!"
Light slaps by McCoy to Scotty's face only served to loll his head from side to side.
Laid out on the floor, the Scotman's expression held a pleasant smile in unconsciousness. Scotty slept with Princess Prozac. The princess resembled Carol Marcus in Scotty's hypo'd head.
Clamoring down the aisle hypo-less, McCoy tried to manhandle Uhura into submission while Donal continued to commit ritual suicide with his mouth.
"Don't take your screw-up out on me, Uhura!"
"I'm not; I'm taking my anger out on you for getting my mate into this hot mess in the first place. You weren't planning on having kids, were you?" she asked, eyeing Donal's second favorite possession (his wallet being the first).
"Naw; kids are expen - saaayyy, wait a minute. You wouldn't - HELP!!"
Uhura's ill-timed knockout punch missed Donal's ducking head and tattooed McCoy. The good doctor went night-night over the prone form of his new best friend, the Chief Engineer.
Donal finally stopped talking - except to scream like a little girl for Kirk or Spock to save him. Uhura leered, executing the next step in her plan to methodically dismember Donal Trumpe. Always thorough in completing her projects, Uhura seriously considered using Gottee's services for post-dismemberment Donal-disposal.
Hearing the commotion, Spock abandoned the shuttle controls to break up the skirmish. The lanky Vulcan crawled with increasing inefficiency through spaces meant for maintenance techs Keenser's height and his mate's girth.
"Whazzamatter with you, you batty broad!? You and Spock made out okay! That witch law-"
Uhura climbed over the top of a seat to lay a hard left to Donal's jaw.
Scared out of his mind, Donal the Mole-Rat crawled under and between seats in the shuttle to escape murder in a short skirt.
"Kirk! Saveme-saveme-saveme! She's insane, like her mother!"
Kirk abandoned the co-pilot seat to help Spock chase after Uhura as she stalked Donal over and under seats and storage bulkheads. Taking the other side of the shuttle, Kirk quickly found himself as encumbered by his bulk as Spock.
"Lieutenant!" Kirk barked.
"Not today, Captain! I'm on medical leave for extreme emotional stress! Ask your CMO when he wakes up!"
McCoy's return from la-la land would require more time...
"Spock - nerve pinch her or something!" Kirk commanded.
"Spock-Spock-Spock! You gotta control your maniac wi-"
Another perfect left caught Donal at his temple, rendering him temporarily loopy.
"It'll be fine," the concussed Donal sing-songed as he twirled like a ballerina down the aisle towards hell in heels, "I converted some of the payouts to latinum and stored them in..."
Spock and Kirk accelerated their desperate scrambles over the seats, vainly trying to stop a mercy killing. Much larger than Nyota, they continued to struggle in the cramped spaces.
Until bigger problems erupted.
No one was flying the shuttle...
Approaching a heavily trafficked section of alpha quadrant, the proximity sensors shrieked in panic at each near miss by an asteroid or spacecraft. Too many potential impacts confused the shuttle's collision avoidance system.
In his haste to save his Comm Chief from serious jail time and his First Officer from domestic violence, Kirk forgot to engage the auto-pilot.
Pilotless, the emergency response AI began to shut down non-essential systems - like the artificial gravity.
Captain and First Officer crashed into each other as they weightlessly bobbed their way back to the pilot's area. Donal floated lonely as a cloud towards Armageddon in sexy boots. Scotty and McCoy looked like Peter Pan and Wendy as they slowly ascended between the shuttle's seats. McCoy banged against the ceiling, cushioning Scotty below him.
A sudden shuttle roll slammed the top of Uhura's head against a support, spinning stars before her eyes. The pain spurred her on.
Kirk and Spock watched in fear as a huge asteroid approached. Experienced hands skittered over the console touchpad to regain control of the craft as they floated above their seats.
Surrounded by debris and other shuttlecraft, they fought the tiny craft to find a path away from decompression and destruction.
Once clear of imminent annihilation, gravity returned with a finger swipe on the control display and the two officers dropped awkwardly into the pilot chairs. McCoy landed back on Scotty, the snoring Scot returning the favor from their ceiling trip.
Uhura finally nerve pinched Trumpe as his not-quite weightless body passed her on its way to the floor. Donal - with the luck of the Irish (and the Talosians) - avoided any further damage to his anatomy, sinking delicately backwards onto a mattress made up of Scotty and McCoy.
That's when the "Collision Imminent" klaxon startled her and...