Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Mass Effect, Fox, Quantic Dream, or a working car.
Virmire, Hoc System,Sentry Omega Cluster.
I've never been one to fear my own mortality. I've dealt death in droves, but it's always been abstract; as though I watch it through somebody else's body. But now I witness it, wholly in the moment.
I watch as Saren dismounts his craft and lunges at Ashley. The shots I fire only bounce off of his barrier, and I can barely blink before he takes Ashley by the throat and rams his claws into her abdomen.
I feel underwater, pushing so hard to get towards them. I slam myself into him shoulder-first, sending us both tumbling. I'm up in an instant, knife out of it's sheathe and-
A hook to my face, Saren moving just a bit faster than I. Liara has the same idea, unleashing a biotic punch that Saren ducks under, uppercutting her and sending her tumbling. Our attacks become a deadly dance, both of us at a skill level that rarely clashes. I'm locked in this dangerous game as my movements become almost fluid, no thought going into it. But biotics win out as I lift up and away, Saren slamming me into the wall. The impact is enough to rattle me, and I look up to see Saren readying a Geth shotgun. The first blast tears at my shield, the second collapsing it and fragmenting against my armor. I see him charge up the third, and I steel myself for the impact.
Pistol shots ring out, some hitting Saren's barrier. Just a moment's distraction, and I'm up, drawing my remaining knife and bringing it into a downward thrust in one practiced motion, punching through the barrier and burying the blade in Saren's shoulder between the shoulder pad and torso. It's enough to make him drop the shotgun, and I hold onto the blade as he spins around, his biotic push knocking me away and ripping the blade free violently, blue blood spraying out as the arm goes limp. Saren's face is a mask of rage as he goes for his pistol, only to be stopped short.
Matthias comes around the corner in an instant, unleashing a hail of gunfire on Saren, supplemented by Wrex and Tali. Saren sprints for his hovercraft, flying away before the fire could knock his hasty barrier down.
He kneels beside me as Tali and Wrex sweep the area with their shotguns. I push him away almost at once, getting up and hobbling over to Ashley. Already the pool of blood was slowing. Her eyes are unfocused, her pulse... I pray that I simply can't feel it, instead of it not being there, but she's not breathing. I hear the Normandy roar overhead I apply pressure to her abdomen, and it's only a moment's hesitation before I reach in my hard case, drawing a boxy green syringe. I jab it into her neck, pressing the plunger down. Ten seconds.
"Cory." Shepard's on the other side of her, fingers pressed to her throat. "We've got to go. There isn't anything we can do." He says as I'm tossing the syringe away.
"Wait." I say quietly. Seven seconds.
"We have to go, now!" Shepard says, grabbing my arm. "She's gone. We need to go before the nuke blows!"
"Wait, Goddamnit!" I yell at him, pushing him away. Three seconds.
Exactly three seconds later, and just as I'm sure it's too late, Ashley's eyes snap open, and she starts to weakly gasp for breath, panic-stricken. Shepard looks at me in shock a moment before getting a hold of her under her shoulders as I get grab her legs, picking her up and rushing towards the open Cargo Bay doors. "Tali, get over here!" I yell, and she hustles over as Wrex helps Liara get up and moving. "Put as much pressure as you can on the wound, ok?" I tell her, and she nods, pressing her hands to the wound as we move.
Doctor Chakwas is waiting in the Cargo Bay as we come in, ushering us into the elevator as I rattle off what happened. The trip upwards feels even longer than usual as we dump all of the Medi-Gel we have on us into her as a holding measure. We arrive, rushing her into the Medical Bay. Chakwas stops us as we set her down onto the bed.
"You need to leave." She says firmly, ordering some of the crewmen inside.
"Why?" I demand from her.
"Because you three are filthy." She says plainly, and I look down at myself. "I will not have you contaminating my surgery." We shuffle out as Chakwas seals the Med-Bay, and draws the shutters. The rest of the ground team comes out of the elevator, looking at the closed door.
"Is she alive?" Liara asks, shaky. I nod slowly, as we sit down at the Mess table. A brief moment of quiet comes over us before Garrus notices something.
"Where's Kaiden?" He asks the table at large. I look at Shepard as he and Tali both look away. Wrex remains stoic, but his eyes give it away as well. Shepard shakes his head. "Spirits," Garrus mutters quietly, holding his head in his hands.
"Yeah, we're a bit in over our heads here." I say, face-down at the table. "Chasing a Spectre across the galaxy, with no actual support from the Council, and in our first real conflict with him we get our shit pushed in." I groan a bit. "Too late to object to our bosses, Shep?" I ask jokingly, but he doesn't return the amusement.
"If anybody wants to step away from this, I wouldn't blame you." He says solemnly. "Cory's right, and I'm not gonna lie to you; I'm in over my head here. But we've been entrusted with something bigger than any of us. We've been given a mission that very well may save the Galaxy. And I know I can't just walk away from that."
"Jeez, Matt." I grumble. "I only meant to say we need to blame everything on the Council. I wasn't saying we abandon this. Besides, anything I go to do after this will be boring." I add, getting a smile from Shepard.
"Wait until you hit my age, youngling. You'll have some stories to tell then." Wrex says to me.
"Somehow, I don't think I'll last that long Wrex." I say, only half-joking. Things quiet down a bit as the mood settles over us again, until I see Liara flinching a bit. "You okay?"
"Not sure." She responds. I stand up, coming over to her chair. She stands, and I check where she's holding her side. I press my hand against it gently, applying a small amount of force. When she only winces a bit, I move away.
"Probably bruised." I sum up. "Come on, I have some meds in my gear downstairs." I lead her into the elevator, Shepard joining us a moment before the doors close.
The trip down is muted, looking at the spilled blood on the elevator floor. The doors are barely open before we step out into the Cargo Bay. I go to my equipment, rifling through it until I find some extra Medi-Gel. Liara shifts to her under armor and Shepard starts talking to me as I apply it.
"Speaking of injuries, are you okay?" He asks me.
"I'm fine Shepard." I say, not looking at him. You're good to go." I say to Liara, and she nods, heading to her station to get changed. Shepard nods, suddenly throwing a punch to my side. The pain covers my face before I can hide it.
"You were wincing the same way Liara was." Shepard says, frowning a bit. "How many cracked ribs?" I look down before answering him.
"Two. Maybe Three."
"Uh huh." He nods. "Come on. Let's get this armor off. Unless you'd rather Tali helped you?" The dead-eyed look I give him does nothing to shake his shit-eating smirk.
We spend some time after I redress in silence, quietly wondering what went wrong. I know if I had said something, I could've changed things. 'Or both of them could have died.' A nagging, insistent voice tells me. 'You said what you knew, you'd never be able to explain it. You have a job to do. This is no game, sacrifices have to be made.' I press my hands to my eyes,willing the thought to go away. But it's still there.
"Kaiden once told me, nobody would get him to do something he didn't believe in." Shepard says aloud, bringing my head up with his words. "He was opinionated, idealistic, and believed that people, for all their sins and failures, could do the right thing. The military wasn't a fan of this line of thinking, but Kaiden proved himself too damn useful. But he wasn't a soldier." Shepard breathes heavily. "What I'm about to say stays between us Cory. No exceptions." I nod slowly.
"I didn't know what to do." I look at him, emotionless. "I knew when I heard that Saren was there, there was a good chance that I would have to stop, and assess priority. Try to save a large part of my squad, maybe only dying in the process and failing my mission, or going after the bomb site, saving one man, and securing the destruction of the facility. The choice was complicated," He continues. "Either route would have a bad ending. But Benezia intervened. The bomb was sure to detonate, Kaiden was gone, and I still had a chance. If I had to make the decision, I would've hesitated, which would've lost everybody.
"Kaiden spoke of art, meaning in design, emotion. Things that I respected, but had little meaning in combat. Ashley Williams saw defensive positioning, cynicism, and how far the council had their heads up their collective asses. And it might not have showed, but I like that in a woman." I chuckle a bit. "But then I had the mission to think about. The bomb, versus three of my teammates. More Geth arriving in the dozens. I had a hard choice, and I'm not sure I could've made it." Shepard swallows thickly.
"This day is something we're gonna dwell on." I start. "You could hear that you made the right decision a thousand times, but you'll never process it. Never really accept that without knowing what it was for, what it accomplished. Kaiden's parents may never understand either, and that is the terrifying price of battle. But I want you to consider this." I open my Omni-Tool, scrolling through until I find my pictures. "By saving me, you gave this little girl," I show him a picture of Letti. "More time with her father." I point to the elevator that Liara got in. " By saving her, you gave a budding young scientist a chance to explore the cosmos, and find the next biggest discovery since the relays. You also gave a chance for Ashley's family, her mother and sisters, to greet her like a hero when she comes home. Kaiden gave you a chance to do all of this, through his sacrifice. You said he didn't do anything he didn't believe in. Well, I'd like to think that he believed in his final moments that his death would mean our lives would be preserved. Another debt I'll never be able to repay. But one I'm going to honor by kicking the shit out of Saren, his Geth, and any damn giant robots that would stand to tear apart everything we live for." I declare. "Sound about right?"
Shepard smiles, only for a moment, and nods his head, closing his eyes. "I just hope it's within our wheelhouse." He shrugs uncharacteristically. "For now, we remember that we're not perfect."
"For now, we remember what it cost us. And when we stand on Sovereign's burning corpse, We'll close our eyes and thank Kaiden for the opportunity." I affirm, getting up and walking to the elevator. "I need to tell Chakwas to administer stage two."
"Stage two? What are you talking about?" I hesitate a moment, before walking back to the crates, extracting a syringe from my armor.
"The other secret of my success." I mutter, far more bitter than I intended. "A rather volatile mix of amphetamines, Cyclobenzaprine, an unpronounceable synthetic pain reliever often used on Elcor, a swarm of soldier Nanites, and some of the same boosters and regulators you find in the bloodstreams of Turian Spec-Ops. In the six times I've used this in my career, four of them saved my life, giving me an air of immortality amongst certain circles. But it's been luck, and a drug mix that's causes you to feel no pain, have so much energy you could beat a Krogan to death bare-handed, have so much control and discipline over your weaponry that you could place seven shots from a Lancer in the same exact place, and keep your body moving where nothing should be alive."
"Jesus." Shepard utters. "And the trade-off?" He asks me.
"Seizures, vomiting, heart problems, liver and kidney damage, nerve damage, and a complete breakdown of brain function without controlling it. To name the worst. Stage two," I continue. "Breaks down several of the chemical boosters, and sends a kill code to the Nanites, who, left unchecked, would attempt to rewrite your body structure. Nanomachines have been used for a fairly long time in the medical field, but never to the extent that I've used them. For good reason." I add. "They're unstable in large numbers,and are rarely allowed to actually live inside a body. The tech shoved into me was a prototype that would allow function on a level to rival Krogan regeneration." I shake my head. "If I had a choice, I'd forgo it. But it's hard-wired into my heart, my spine, and my brain."
"So those are what's killing you."
"Yes. Though far slower than the larger ones would, they're changing my body structure. Left uncompleted and unmonitored, I would slip into a coma and slowly die. The only alternative that would have any affect would require the same thing, without death. My body breaks down most of what's in those syringes, so I don't need stage two. But with the dose I took on Therum, I probably knocked my lifespan down a year."
"The more damage your body takes, the faster those bots change your structure." He surmises. I nod.
"It's funny, in a way." I continue. "I thought I'd be scared. Instead, it's given me purpose, freedom to do what I do best."
"What about Letti?" He asks, hitting my one weak point.
I shake my head a little. "Asari kids, they develop speech skills, motor function pretty fast. But she's gonna keep that child-like mentality for maybe 20 years. For now I'm a concept, a nice thing with no real meaning. Dad isn't going to mean much now, and by the time it does I'll be more mature, or dead." There's a pause, before I continue my trip to the elevator.
"Doctor." Chakwas looks up, motioning something to the woman in alliance fatigues next to her before approaching me. "How is she?" She looks past me.
"Shepard out there?" She asks me.
"Cargo bay." I answer her. "What's wrong?" She looks back at the medical bed, tubes winding around Ashley in an effort to keep her alive.
"Whatever you administered to her, it saved her life. But it's also making sure I cant do much farther to help." She frowns. "I assume it's tailored to yourself." Realization dawns on me as I nod. "This kind of make-up isn't meant to be used in others. It could kill her far worse than bleeding out would've."
"I didn't have many options." I grumble. "I had to try. That's why I brought you something that would stop the effects." She takes the syringe out of my hand.
"We can't stop the effects right now." She explains. "It's the only thing keeping her alive, and until we get to the Citadel, we won't have the equipment to help her." She looks around the med-bay. "This place is stocked to deal with the trauma of battle, gunshots, explosions, blunt and sharp-force trauma, but she was dead, Cory. Now her kidneys are failing due to damage, and we can't perform dialysis here. She's lost so much blood that it isn't producing properly. I've requested a mandatory donation of A-negative from the crew, But there's more." She looks back at Ashley, sighing. "Her spinal cord is damaged, and though we won't know until she wakes up, there's a chance she'll be paralyzed."
"Christ." I bow my head a little.
"Combine that with everything else... It's harsh to say, but she might've been better off if you left her down there." My head snaps up at this.
"What? And her family would be better off with a coffin? How could you say that?" Her face shows little emotion.
"Because I've seen more people like this than you have." The statement is simple, matter-of-fact. "Williams is a career soldier. Losing the ability to walk? Even if she makes it through this, She'll feel dead inside. And what does one family's suffering mean to you, Cory?" She asks me.
"A lot, when I have the chance to make things right." I turn, heading for the door.
"Wait." Chakwas catches up to me before I leave. "I need a favor."
"How so?"
"What I told you... Don't tell Shepard." I raise my eyebrows a bit. "He doesn't show it much, but he cares about Ashley. He'll learn soon enough. Better he grieves, and stays focused." I frown, but say nothing as I leave.
Shephard's outside as I walk into the now emptied Mess Hall. "How is she?" I pause a moment, considering my words.
"She's gonna live, man." I say quietly. "We just need to get to the Citadel."
"Good." He mutters, nodding. I look him over a bit.
"You should get some rest." I tell him. "Chakwas will inform you if her condition changes." Probably.
"Yeah, You're right. It's out of our hands now." I sigh a little.
"I hate that feeling."
"Me too." He brings up his Omni-Tool. "But there's good news. We found out where those files were going from the Cerberus outposts." He forwards me the information on his Omni-Tool. "What do you think?" I offer no response, looking over the personnel listings.
Francis Decker.
I knew him as Albert. But identities change.
People don't.
I'm coming Decker. Hell will follow.
A/N: I'm a bad person.
I'd like to thank everybody who's been patiently waiting for this story to go on. No more excuses for my laziness and bad luck.
More to follow.
Artyom