John: Feel Like Shit
"John. What's going on with you lately?" Jade asked, sitting next to me on the ground using the wall as support. I bit my lip and stared down at the ground for a few seconds, before I spat out my frustration "I just told her about the band! I had no idea what was going to happen, and if I did I would change it, alright?" She looked stunned that I said something, and I realized quickly it was because I said "her". I was about to give a cover up for it, but I didn't have the energy to lie, especially not to her. She looked weirdly disappointed, scratching the back of her neck and then saying "I, um…I didn't mean that, John. I meant how can you still not tell Karkat who you told? Don't you see how dangerous this is?" She put a hand on my shoulder, which would have been able to calm me on any other day. But not today, this was something where just a comforting pap wouldn't solve everything.
"It's…it's too late now! I won't tell her anything anymore, or anyone for that matter. Telling him who I told won't take back what happened! I'll just keep silent, isn't that enough?" She sighed, looking for the words to say. "Yes, I assume so. I guess that is all you can do now, besides apologize." I chuckled, standing up "Right, Karkat will just stop hating me because I said I'm sorry with big puppy dog eyes." "It works for me!" She said quickly, her smile radiating through the room. "That's cause you're adorable. But I have to go either way, there's some stuff I have to take care of." "…alrighy. And John" she paused, causing me to turn in suspense "be careful?" "I will" I said with a smile, probably fake at that point, and then made my way out.
Alright, alright, you'll be fine. Just never tell anyone anything, and apologize to Karkat once it's been a few days…which'll probably only make things worse. But at least he'll know that you didn't mean anything.
Just as I finished my thought, I nearly crashed into Dave because of my drifting thoughts. I muttered an apology and began walking almost instantly after, not wanting to face him. I didn't feel like getting stared down by a pair of shades, and I knew he had something to say to me. Honestly, I wasn't sure what was up with him but he's just acting so differently recently so I didn't want to get into that.
What I did have to get into, is why telling someone one thing caused all of this. Why would she get someone to hurt Karkat? It just didn't make sense to me and I wanted to get it to make sense already. So, I left the music store and pulled out my phone. I got to her contact and texted her saying "hey, it's john, can we talk at your place? if it's not a problem" After a few seconds of standing there, I got a reply saying "If we must, then who am I to refuse, Come on down!" That reply kind of set my thinking off balance, like she really didn't want to talk…but we had to, so I just disregarded it.
Either way, I started walking down to her house and thinking about what would I even say to her. Well, I just came here to ask you why you sent a group of crazy people to kill Karkat and to ask you politely to never do that again, thanks! Like that would go over well. I didn't even know if she actually DID anything, so I couldn't be blunt with it. I just had to wing it, and hopefully that'd be enough.
My stomach twisted a bit more with each step, paranoia working its magic on me as I dived into the thought of her actually hurting Karkat. I wanted to just say "There's no way she would do that to anyone" and go home, but I didn't really know. I've only known her for a few weeks now, and while I've told her most everything about me, she's been pretty secretive with who she is. The only thing I knew was her name and the fact that she loves talking in cliffhangers almost. She's said "You'll see" more times than I could count, and that's not even the worst of them. To anyone else, it probably would have sent them into madness. But yet, here I was, walking to her to probably only get more of them.
Then, as if it was a block away from the store, her house was just in front of me. I didn't even remember making the walk, but I knew that now I was out of thinking time. I coughed and swallowed hard, knocking on the door and then quickly readjusting my position. I was never this nervous before, and I debated turning around when the door opened wide, showing her in her short shorts and a tank top. Her black hair easily went past her hips and she had this smirk that seemed to be on her blue lips every time I saw her. "Hey there, John! Come on in, I've got some beers opened on the table, so I expect some great stories about your band!" I didn't respond at first, maybe hesitation or because I was staring at her, I had no idea. But after a few seconds I snapped out of it, walking into the house and closing the door behind me. "Right, well, I've got something to tell you in all seriousness actually" I called out after her as she walked into her kitchen. After a little bit, she walked back over and swung her arms around my neck, kissing me lightly and then saying "Well then spill it already! Here in the Serket house, we never hold back."