Chapter 4

Draco's POV

I banged the silver bell again, the little mechanism that caused the chimes to echo in the small shop hitting the palm of my hand harshly. For the third time I looked at the door beyond the counter, sure if I jumped over and barged through I would find the irresponsible shop keeper jabbering on that damned muggle contraption that all the locals seemed to talk into. Shop keeper was a grandiose term in his favour considering this should hardly be regarded as a shop, I tossed a glance around the sorry excuse for a retail outlet. It was the size of an enlarged broom cupboard and about as dusty and uncomfortable as one, with disorder being the organizing tool this 'shop keeper' appeared to live by. There were shelves and shelves and shelves on shelves of an array of unidentifiable merchandise, which made me replace the rhythm of my finger on wood with the chimes from the useless alerting bell once more.

I heard the loud familiar laugh and tossed a glance at the entrance, which considering the size of the shop was just two feet away and banged the bell for a third time at the sight of the boys ruddy face. I would describe Blaise's face to be many things, aristocratic and arrogant with not a sign of his actual feelings and thoughts on display, yet ruddy I never thought would one day grace the terms of description. Blaise, the taller of the two boys that blocked the exit and consequently any light that had the pitiful job of casting it's rays on this shop, laughed loudly as he hung off Theo, who proficient as he was at keeping a blank face was beyond the control at present, a grin pointed at his darker friend's animated explanation of Salazar knows what.

I sighed, glaring at the door across from me once more and then turning on my heel and taking the two strides to the exit, this seemed to distract Blaise enough from his storytelling, and he clapped me on the chest, falling forward and laughing.

"You remember Draco right? It fell right over, soaking up into her white t-shirt like water to a ducks back." I didn't even correct the atrociously wrong comparison and tried to brush him off my shoulder, glaring at Theo who seemed to take specific pleasure in my discomfort. Blaise's step forward however unblocked the exit, and I had a view of the small village once more. It was the only downside of Belle Île, this insipid muggle village whose only redeemable factor was the fact that it housed very few inhabitants, yet they were here never the less, hustling to and fro with that distinctive muggle look about them. They didn't even try dressing with any modicum of style, I watched as faded shorts and stained t-shirts floated across the small cobbled street that lay at the shops entrance. The men all had that ghastly rod-like wooden contraption that they all liked to hang by the sea which now hung off their shoulders as they laughed and joked, ruddier faces than even Blaise's displaying their simple minds. The shorts were swapped for two dresses, the raucous laughter swapped for a feminine twinkle as two girls smiled past at the entrance, carrying baskets down the cobbled streets, their eyes holding promises of adventures that would surely make even Pansy blush, and that was saying something.

Blaise wolf whistled at the pair, who had manes varying shades darker than my own, but whatever ideas his attention seemed to attract was dispersed by the look that graced my face, as they ceased their incessant giggling and scuttled off down the now quiet street. I looked at the sky, it was going to be dark very soon, I looked back at Blaise.

"Maybe we can just go without him?"

I glanced at Theo, trying to read the truth behind his question.

"Maybe I can go in his place?"

I looked at the voice that came from the wall next to the door, where the sandy haired boy stood patiently waiting for our business to be done in the small shop, his brown eyes as readable as Theo's hazel eyes were unreadable, the hope evident in them. I knew most of his enthusiasm came from the fact that he wanted to be of some assistance to me, a cross between a man's need to pay back his benefactor in some way and a boy's need to impress someone he looked up to, Salazar knows why. He knew the answer, like I had stated the first time he asked yet he still looked on hopefully. I didn't favour him with an answer, somehow not wanting to annihilate that hopeful feeling, a selfless part of me that I wasn't even aware existed wanting to keep him more boy than man. Maybe it came from the fact that my own ratio very recently was leaning towards the man side, and from this side, I would do my hardest to push Liam south of the line. I didn't realise that I was running my right palm over the flesh of my left arm, caressing the blank pale skin there that would soon change.

"MALFOY!"

I heard the loud somewhat recognisable shout before I was knocked a step back into the pint sized shop by the dark maned created that attacked me. I could barely see my attacker considering I could barely look down as she held me in the tightest hug that had ever been exerted on me…ever…not even by my mother…

I pushed at her arms around my waist when my heart finally started beating at a normal pace, recovering from the assault of soft flesh and enchanting scents that seemed to accelerate its rate greater than a catalyst in a potion. I gave up trying to push Thornton off me, glaring at the two girls behind her, the red haired who was half on the floor laughing at this interaction, her long pale legs exposed by the short emerald green dress, which by Pansy's constant nattering made me realise that it was in fact a beach dress. The brown haired girl at her shoulder looked displeased by both her one friend's pleasure, and the others actions, clad in a bright yellow dress that exposed just how much she had developed over the Summer in its clinging nature. I glanced at Theo and just as I suspected, the boy was transfixed.

I was suddenly allowed to breathe again as Thornton decided on a new target, wrapping her arms around an overeager Blaise, her tan back exposed, only hindered by the thin line of black string that spanned its upper width, the white backless beach dress useless in its job of covering her up considering what the eye couldn't see, could very easily be imagined by the thin material and the clinging cloth. A unexpected burning radiated from my abdomen and I suddenly preferred her assaulting me with her affections than my darker companion, whose hands were too comfortably placed on her naked back.

"Malfoy, please excuse me." I looked down at Granger, whose brown eyes glowered up at me, but her voice remained polite and I stepped out of her way in the crowded shop, allowing her entry. I glanced back at the hugging pair, who finally extricated themselves but Blaise's hand was still at her back as she was animatedly talking to him. Theo walked past me and into the shop and I turned and headed to the counter as well.

"Excusez-moi!" Granger's clear voice echoed through the small shop, I didn't bother to tell her that her attempt to get the owners attention was useless considering I was too busy keeping a track of Blaise's usually wandering hands, which thankfully was behaving presently but it was more south of her back than I was comfortable with.

There was a soft click and I snapped my head forward, a young witch, no older than us, walked out, her dark skin glowing, her hands removing some contraption from her ear.

"You are lucky you caught me between change of songs." She said in a thick French accent, was it that obvious that we were British. Granger nodded, understanding what that meant. I however didn't and opened my mouth to demand an apology for her early blatant disregard for a customer's attention but closed it as I heard Thornton's loud laughter floating across the room as Blaise giggled like a girl at whatever she said.

"Can we please have a Sober-Up tonic?" I turned to the front, what Granger asked for explaining so much.

"Make that two." I didn't say please, Malfoys do not plead, plus the girl was negligent at her job and didn't deserve any sort of niceties. She turned without any inclination that she heard what we had requested and walked to the door she entered from, I glanced back at Blaise who was hanging off Thornton whose turn it seemed was to flamboyantly gesture as she retold a story. My eyes met Granger's as I turned to the front when I heard the noise of the returning assistant.

"There's only one."

She held up the little bottle which I wasted my last hour on pursuing.

"I'll take it." I looked at the girl at my side as she echoed the exact same words, her eyes narrowed in a mirrored expression to my own. The next second we broke eye contact and looked back at the assistant, our hands following our eye movement but thanks to being the Slytherin Seeker for the past four years I grabbed the bottle with ease, smirking at the angry glower in Grangers eye.

"Eight euros." The assistant could care less about who got the tonic and I fished in my pocket, cursing the fact that this was a muggle store even though they dispatched potions to wizards and witches undercover. I took out the paper notes and tossed it on the desk, ready to walk away.

"Euros. Not pounds." I looked at the expressionless girl. What in Salazars sac was she saying? Whatever it was made Granger grin widely and I frowned at the note, it had a big ten on it. What was wrong?

Granger took out a note that lacked the muggles Queen's face on it and held it out to the girl who looked at me, "If you do not have the money, I cannot sell it to you."

"I have the money, look you're just going to eventually exchange this for galleons, why don't I just pay in galleons."

"It's against store policy. Please hand over the tonic." I glanced down at Granger who smiled at me in expectation.

"I'll give you ten galleons for it."

The girl was unfazed.

"Twenty." I hid any sign of desperation in the blasé stated offer.

"Malfoy, just hand over the tonic. You don't have the money for it." The last statement made Granger's face split into a wide beam as she relished saying those words. I scowled down at her as she held her hand out for the small bottle, her eyes gleaming at the fact that she won this round...well she thought she did.

I sighed, tossing the bottle up in the air and I watched as she made to catch it, all smiles gone from her face as realisation dawned at her that she won't be in time well before the tinkle of glass breaking echoed through the small room.

"Maylfoy! You incorrigible prat!"

"Oops, sorry. Here." I tossed a few galleons at her feet in payment. I had to take a step back however as she launched herself at me, teeth bared, Theo had his arms wrapped around her waist securely and she glared at me, I looked down at her uncanny behaviour clinically, this was unlike Granger. Well, I couldn't say really considering I never associated with her but I was a good judge of character and this definitely seemed well off her mark. Then again she was a muggle, maybe she was tired of playing witch and gave in to her base instincts at long last.

"I am going to kill you!"

I rolled my eyes, blocking her out and looking at Theo, "We should try Madame Zubiner."

"Even with their express delivery system it will not get here in time." Granger pushed his hands away and he let go of her, a smile on his face. "But I think I have a plan that would make all parties happy. I could brew it in twenty minutes; I'm just missing a few ingredients that they probably stock here."

Granger's red face glowered as she thought over his suggestion, "I can brew it. I'll just-"

"Please, let me. To make up for yours spilling."

I smirked as her eyes grew large at the words and turned around and walked to the door, leaving her to rant to Theo. My smirk fell at the sight I found at the doorstep, Blaise had his hands on Thornton's waist as he twirled her around the middle of the cobbled street, singing some Italian song that had both her, the She-weasel and Liam in stitches. Her laughter was effervescent, varying in tone as each giggle escaped her lips and it flowed throughout her body, reddening her face, shaking her bare shoulders, brightening her eyes which must have been aided by the liquor I assumed she previously consumed. Suddenly her grey eyes met my own and I took a step back at her almost instant appearance before me,

"Dance with me!"

She grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the shop, I was too shocked to resist and stood still as she flung her hands around my neck, expectantly looking up at me. What was she doing…what on earth was she doing…wasn't she with Potter? I felt her body up against mine and my hands twitched as it wanted to hold her waist but I stopped myself at the angry flare that burned within me at her sudden forwardness. This wasn't some game, her face was carefree and playful and it was all well and good for her, she could fuck around with me, rubbing her tantalizing body against mine and then disappearing back to Potter without a care in the world whilst I'm left trying to figure out what the fuck is going on.

I wrenched her hands from around my neck and stepped back, her laughter finally stopping at whatever look I had on my face and for once in the two years I knew her, a foreign look crossed her face…a look of insecurity as her hands held her waist in a display of vulnerability and suddenly cold replaced the heat at my belly.

"We've got the ingredients." I didn't listen to the rest of what Theo said and started down the street, my hands trembling slightly, grateful that Blaise was too drunk to notice and Theo too distracted to care. What was she playing at, even if she was drunk, it didn't explain why Granger did nothing to stop her from throwing herself at me, it seemed the likely thing to do. Plus, Thornton was blind to the world for the past few months, all she knew was Potter. All she cared for was Potter. That's why it was so easy for Alya to get to her, Thornton was full of distractions and she was an easy target.

I heard the soft crunch of grass as I left the footpath and could hear the murmur of voices behind me and I quickened my pace, weaving through trees and ducking under branches. The small stone cottage came into view and I lengthened my strides, feeling the tingling sensation of wards notifying me as the others walked through the imaginary boundary behind me.

"Draco?"

I turned, looking at Theo, who stood next to Granger a few feet back. I walked back, ignoring the dark haired head, "What?"

Theo glanced at Granger, who glared at me. I sighed, yes blame Malfoy. I put up the anti-mudblood wards. I looked at Theo, "What do you want me to do?"

I couldn't take them down, I didn't learn that yet, plus I doubt I would if I could. What was the problem?

"Go brew the potion, she can just wait here." There was no reason for any of them to be here, this was supposed to be a boys' night that started two nights ago after Blaise and Daphne broke up. Granger wasn't welcome and neither was She-weasel and Thornton was the last person I wanted anywhere near me at present. Theo resolutely stood by her side and I growled, do I fucking have to do everything. I grabbed the bag of ingredients and turned on my heel, wrenching the door open and taking the stairs two at a time down to the basement, I knew there was a potion lab somewhere here, even though it was never used.

"Draco!"

"Fuck!" I put the ingredients on the table and stormed out, "What?"

Liam took a scared step back, practically hiding behind the She weasel who pointed at the drawing room floor. I took in a deep breath, walking toward the unconscious body, hoisting him off the floor with the help of a recovered Liam, and letting Blaise fall onto the sofa in a loud thud.

"I…I don't know where Ky is."

I growled, "Did she come into the house or is she outside with Theo and Granger?"

"She came inside."

I glanced around, almost expecting her to jump out from behind a sofa, "Go downstairs, turn right, third door, brew Sober-Up tonic. Ingredients on desk, instructions in book on third shelf."

I didn't wait for his answer, knowing he must know by now it wasn't a question and walked to the stairs. The cabin was magically enlarged on the inside with a modest three floors, I pushed open doors as I went up, looking for the bed of dark hair, caught between wanting to see it and hating to see it.

"Thornton!"

I stood, at the last door, the one place I did not want her to be but somehow knew that she would be there. I pushed it open and didn't have to shout out for her, she stood with her back to me, her long dark strands cascading over her tan skin that glowed as the setting sun glowed through the large bay windows that she stared out of. I stepped forward quietly, hypnotised by her stillness, my eyes feasting on her form out of my own control. I looked at the small of her back, the backless white dress starting just below the dimples at the foot of her spine, which were hidden by a pink label that read Victoria's Secret that I had the urge to push into the cloth that had nothing to do with my obsessive compulsion with regard to labels that stuck out. My eyes lowered to her bum, and suddenly the past months tension released from the knot in my neck and the anger at the current situation died down as I stared at her perfect derriere.

It suddenly disappeared as she turned around, grey eyes wide and eyelashes wet as she gasped into her hands, her shoulder trembling and she ran towards me. I held my hands out, not sure why she was crying but ready to comfort her never the less but my hands remained empty as her dark mane fluttered past me as she ran past my opened arms. I stood, frozen in confusion until I heard the wretch that made my own stomach turn.

I walked through the en suite door without a second thought and kneeled down, my hands jumping at the excuse to hold back her hair as her face hovered above the toilet as she wretched again. I rubbed her back and my hair stood on end at the softness, she wretched again but this time all that was emitted was gasps of air and she pulled the toilet chain, falling backwards and leaning against the wall as I stood, opening the tap and handing her a glass of water that she threw back into her pink lips.

She wiped at her mouth with the back of her hand, ignoring the hand towel that hung just above her head. She then pressed her hands to her eyes, a sure sign of dizziness, coaxing her senses back to order. All the while I just stood there, like a lion contemplating if the kill was worth it if the animal was wounded…

I let my back hit the cold tiles of the opposing wall and I slid down, seated across from her with my legs stretched out next to her own, luckily this was a small bathroom unlike the one I had back home so the walls were closer together.

"Will you stop that?" There was no tilt to her voice and I think the giddiness of the alcohol must be wearing off.

"Stop what?"

She removed her palms from her eyes, the grey lacking its usual brightness which had nothing to do with the slowly darkening room. That was the one downfall of requesting the house elves to leave this cabin during the duration of our stay, simple things like lighting lamps and fires had to actually be done ourselves. "Giving me that look."

So she's noticed me looking at her, I didn't look guilty though, there was nothing wrong with appreciating the female form, "Stop earning it then."

I didn't mean it, I didn't really want her to cover up, I respected her confidence, it actually was very attractive. Thornton could wear anything, revealing to concealing and not care who thought what of it. It was unlike Pansy who always coupled revealing clothes with an attention seeking personality which made her come off as desperate.

"I did nothing to deserve your pity!" She snapped, her nostrils flaring. An unfamiliar feeling crossed my forehead as I furrowed my brows at her, what was she going on about, pity? I didn't pity her.

She suddenly stood and I could tell it was too quickly as I shot up as she stumbled, her eyes dazed, "Slow movements Thornton, let's not aggravate the damage."

I concentrated on my tone of voice, trying to extract any sign of how much her closeness affected me. She hovered back and forth for a moment and then leaned forward, onto my chest, finally still. I could control my voice, but I had no reign over my heart which was thumping loudly I was shocked she didn't scramble away at the deafening sound.

My hands hovered awkwardly at her side, wondering whether to hold her at her place or shove her off. She took the decision away as she slowly lifted her head but she didn't step back, her eyes glistening and her expression soft.

"What happened?"

I really wanted to know, no, I needed to know. What chipped at her hard exterior and took away the lilt in her chin, strength in her stare, the stubborn set of her lips.

"Am I boring?"

Her voice was small but I her heard quite clearly, boring? Thornton, was many things but boring was definitely not one of them. I wanted to ask why she asked me this, but the look on her face as she waited for my response made me answer honestly instead.

"No, definitely not. I'm quite an expert on boring girls, and you Thornton do not make the cut." Pansy was boring, predictable, most girls were, too easy to read. She on the other hand was one large mystery novel that not only pulled you in, but had you thinking about long after you closed the book.

"He is quite the expert in girls, isn't he?" She thought the last part out aloud but she didn't realise that she had, the effects of what I realised was Danahagh from her scent at this proximity, had not all but left her just yet. "Say Draco, when did you have sex with Pansy?"

I blinked, expecting a thousand questions except that one. What? When? Pansy? Pansy and I haven't been together since last month, the one good thing about having the Dark Lord as a regular addition to the inhabitants of Malfoy Manor meant that he deterred unwanted guests. Pansy wrote constantly but I hadn't seen her since term end.

"I mean for the first time." She mumbled, looking at the third button of my plain white shirt.

"5th June, 1995." She smiled at the response, my confusion growing.

"And what was the time." I caught on to the meaning of her comment; she was surprised that I remembered the date.

"It's nothing sentimental; it was my birthday, hard to forget that date."

The smile fell from her face, "It was your birthday?"

The fact that I had sex with Pansy for the first time on my birthday seemed to affect her more than I thought it would. "Nothing beats birthday sex."

Why was I trying to joke? Why was I trying to break that sad expression on her face? It didn't work however and she continued staring at my button.

"Was it your idea, or Pansy's?"

I frowned, her questions getting weirder. "Danahagh's."

"You lost your virginity whilst drunk?" She looked up in shock and I smirked.

"Who said anything about losing my virginity to Pansy?"

She looked at me sceptically, did she honestly believe I've never been with another woman before.

"When then?"

"I don't remember the exact date considering it wasn't my birthday, but it was during the Summer before forth year."She cocked an eyebrow at me and I shrugged, so what? I was fourteen, that might be a little young but I was also rich, entitled and good looking. Would you say no to a Spanish seventeen year old who had breasts bigger than your head and legs almost as long as you were…then again that didn't exactly make for a great first time considering I barely knew what to do with them, but Aida, rural she might have been but she was a great teacher and Pansy owed a lot to her considering she helped hone my technique. But would the girl ever listen, it was one of her greatest disappointments after we fucked for the first time realising that it was in fact not my first time and I had not saved myself for her like she did for me.

It suddenly dawned on me why Thornton was asking all these questions and my blood heated in anger but I hid it with a smirk, "So Potter actually managed to convince someone to have sex with him other than you?"

Potter wasn't rich, entitled or good looking but he was famous. Thornton shouldn't take it so seriously if he fucked someone before her, she obviously wasn't as cool a girlfriend as she presented to the world if she held his past experiences against him. She looked startled at the question and I felt slightly guilty for asking it.

"We didn't have sex." She looked just as put out by the fact than I was shocked by it. They didn't have sex. I laughed in my head, Potter was a bigger ponce than I thought he was, he had all of this to himself for the past couple of months and he didn't manage to seal the deal. "Do you think I'm sexy?"

My mind went blank at that and I think I actually took a step back, she definitely was still tipsy cause she was asking questions like that…did I think she was sexy! I think the sole reason I even tolerated her was because she was the hottest girl at school, and one of the contributing factors was her confidence. Why was she sounding so unsure, Thornton knew how hot she was, it was one of the reasons why it barely fazed her.

"Draco?" She was actually waiting for an answer, I scoffed. I looked down at her, at her eyes uncharacteristically innocent and her pink lips in a pout, at the way her shoulders drooped in vulnerability.

"You're beautiful. Probably the most beautiful girl I have ever seen."

She stepped back at the compliment, her eyes wide and face angry. "Sure, that's why you kissed someone else! That's why you chose someone else! That's why you…you…you…" She swayed slightly, holding her hands to her forehead, the sudden outburst dizzying her. I quickly held her and directed her to the bed, making her sit down.

I went back to the bathroom and grabbed a glass of water, pulling her hands away from her forehead to force her to drink it.

"Was this your first time?" She looked up at me over the rim of the glass, confused. "Drinking, that is." She had made it quite clear of two things, one that she was in fact a virgin, and two, Potter cheated on her! Cheated! On her! Both things however seemed to cause this strange feeling of excitement in my body and I tried to fight the urge to smile too brightly.

She nodded, suddenly holding her head again, "Don't exaggerate your movements, slow and steady. Did you drink the Danahagh straight?"

I could tell she did by the sheepish look that graced her face and my smile widened, "Smart Thornton, very smart." I could get drunk on Danagagh drank neat and I was practically immune to it. Judging from She-Weasel and Granger though, Thornton must be a light weight because the former two barely displayed signs of being intoxicated.

I lowered myself on the bed next to her, as she stared ahead silently, seeing something entertaining in the plain white walls. She stood, taking a walk to the wall and then inspecting it. She pivoted, a persistently fake expression of excitement on her face, and walked to the closet, opening it and staring blankly in.

"What are you looking for?" I stood, her odd behaviour making me somewhat nervous.

"A personality."

I laughed, "And I suppose you'll find one in the closet?" I don't know why I was letting her change the subject, but I somehow preferred the fake happiness than the genuine sadness.

She giggled, running her hand over one of my sweaters, "They're all the same. Same cut, same material."

"Different colours though." I added and I was surprised to find that I sounded defensive.

"Well the way you wear them one would not even notice." She walked to the next drawer pulling it open with a smile and I sighed, knowing which drawer that was.

"I suppose the type of briefs I wear are up for debate as well?"

She giggled, fishing out a black pair with a cocked eyebrow, "Snug."

"I have a lot to be held in place." I smirked and her smile widened as she pushed the drawer closed, moving to the curtains, pushing a drape aside and looking at the wall underneath. "Aha!" She smiled at me, eyes full of wonder, "I've found something!"

I walked forward, quickened by my curiosity and rolled my eyes at what she pointed at, "Who is EL?"

She grinned at the little engraving of a heart surrounding the initials DM and EL. "Elizabeth Lexington." She frowned, the name obviously sounding familiar.

"I was in love with her all of first year; she was going to be my first kiss until Pansy stole it in a game of spin the wand. Managed to make out with her a year back though, not what I expected."

"Too much tongue?"

I grinned, "No, let's just say it's sad when a pretty face turns out to be just that."

She looked thoughtful, "Maybe she just didn't have enough experience."

"She's the lead singer of Wicken, I would hate to think she doesn't have enough experience."

She shrugged, walking back to the bed, the alcohol fluctuating her mood. I sighed, should I ask about what I assume was Potter cheating on her, or should I just ignore it, change the subject like she kept trying to do.

"How's Bellamy?"

Well that definitely answered my question; Potter must have really fucked up if she wanted to talk about Alya.

I shrugged, allowing the change of subject. "Haven't seen her in a while. Been here for the past few days."

"That's decent of you, to whisk Blaise away in his time of need."

"How do girls make things sound so sentimental? I dragged him away from his constant mopping after Daphne, and replaced his tears with lots of Vodka and Whiskey."

"What a good friend you are." She emphasised the friend and I rolled my eyes.

"Hardly. I felt like running off to this place once holiday began, this was the first excuse I could find."

"Still nice of you to bring Theo and Liam along."

"Theo wasn't invited, he just pitched up. And Liam lives with me so he goes where I go."

"Theo's such a good friend to you that he doesn't require an invite and Liam is like your little brother."

"Is that what you took from that statement, Thornton? Tell me, is it a fun game. Humanise the Malfoy? Just how long will it take to make him feel? Winner gets two hundred points."

"Well I guess I've already won because I've made you feel loads of times. Anger is a feeling right?" She smirked but I didn't return it, she had no idea just how much she made me feel, especially considering she was looking at me like that right now.

"You probably wouldn't remember this conversation once you sober up…"

She leaned in, "I'm sure you'll remind me."

"And then you'll curse me."

"Why would I curse you?"

"When did you ever need a reason?"

She laughed, little bursts of scented Danahagh, "Maybe you should do something to make this moment unforgettable for me?"

I stopped grinning, was she…was she asking for me to kiss her? She leaned in forward and my breath caught…and with a soft thud I let out a sigh…