A/N: IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY
I could go on forever but that would waste your time. Now... what can I say except please forgive me?
I don't know how it happened but somehow it is now the end of December when it should still be the end of November where I left you...
I don't know... I haven't been on twitter or ff or anything really, stuff happened and then Christmas happened so its a late Happy Christmas from me...
I haven't been ignoring you or anything I just... ugh I cant even begin to explain... at times I just haven't really been coping too well so...
I have just been playing animal crossing non stop, to give you a guide, I have had acnl since 3rd Nov, and I've played on it for nearly 500 hours and am a year ahead in time but I'm stopping thing now and I know you don't care about my ac crap but I'm saying it anyway..
And its 3:37 am but I don't care, you can have this when you wake up. And it is a long chapter of over 1000 so. And also I'm writing this on my new tablet which thinks it knows what i want to write before I know myself so any mistakes please blame it, also I'm getting used to typing on it still.
Apparently my grandma thought it was an iPad but I don't care cuz I love it and on android I get the full cut the rope free! Yay for omnom the blob who loves candy!
ALSO MASSIVE NEWS APPARENTLY IN THE NEW YEAR SOME TIME BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY WHICH IS FEBRUARY WE ARE GETTING A DOG AND AHDHFJDUDJEBEJFIDUSBEHRKFOCHSBEHDJFOC I AM SO EXCITED AND I CANT EVEN AND WE ARE RESCUING ONE BUT WE DONT KNOW WHICH YET AND I FOUND THIS ADORABLE PUPPY CALLEF TINSEL AND SHES HALF SHELTIE HALF SALUKI AND AHHBISKSUEIDB SHES ADORABLE BUT MY MUM SAYS SHES TOO BIG AND WE CANT HAVE HER AND IM SO SAD BUT IM SURE WE'LL FIND THE RIGHT PUPPY SOON, SO ANYWAY SORRY FOR CAPS, CASSANDRA YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE CAPS LOL okie no more caps now.
New chapter, sorry its so over due, its right where we left off.
Enjoy
or not..=-O
Chapter Eighteen: Princesses and Pirate Ships
Larissa frantically ran around the school looking for Draco, she had contemplated things over in her mind and had decided that Draco at least deserved to know she was okay.
She was about to give up and go to find Harry when she saw him, or saw his hair at any rate, there was no mistaking his platinum blonde hair as he turned around a corner and into an empty class room.
Larissa ran after him and stopped in the doorway, Draco was standing by the window looking out of it, he was breathing heavily. He ran his fingers through his hair and turned around, immediately rushing towards her when he saw Larissa.
'Are you alright?' He asked, wrapping his arms around her.
'I'm fine,' Larissa replied,
'They didn't hurt you? I was sure they would.'
'Me too. But they didn't. I'm fine, really I am.'
'What did they do then if they didn't hurt you?'
'Said they didn't like me talking back and giving 'smart arse' answers.'
'And only you would give them in that situation,' Draco laughed softly, before releasing Larissa from his arms, giving her a strange look, and backing out of the room slowly.
Larissa stared after him for a second, wondering what had just happened and then ran after him.
'Draco!' She shouted, although it wasn't really a shout, more of a yelp.
She caught up with him and tugged on his sleeve to stop him running any farther. He yanked his arm away sharply and turned around, holding his arm a little behind his body as if shielding it from her, his other arm just hung at the side of his body, as usual.
'I have to go.' He said quietly.
'Why do you always do this?'
'Do what?'
'Run away at the strangest times with no explanation and I might not see you for days to come!'
'I'm sorry.' He said, but not entirely convincingly.
'If you were then you wouldn't be doing this!'
'Why are you getting all worked up about this?'
'Because you're my cousin and I care about you!'
'You're making a big deal out of nothing.'
'I am not!'
'You are over reacting!'
'I really don't think I am.'
'You are acting like a child.'
Before she could retort, he cut in, 'you are a child.'
'I hardly think-'
'Leave me alone Larissa, I'm busy.'
'You're always busy.'
'Maybe I have better things to do than argue with a fourteen year old!'
'Is that all I am to you? A child?'
Draco didn't answer, he walked away without saying another word.
{xxx}
Larissa didn't see Draco in the next few hours, but they passed each other in the hall once before dinner. He held his hand out slightly and slipped a piece of paper folded up into a small square into her hand. He didn't say anything, nor even look at her.
Once Draco had passed through the corridor, she carefully unfolded the note. It read-
'I don't have time for childish arguments, I have more important things to do, things you won't understand, and you couldn't understand so I won't even begin to try and explain to you.
But I can't do this anymore. And I know you understand what I mean, and maybe I have been acting strange but I can't be close to you, not phisically or emotionally.
I'm sorry. Believe me when I say it, I've said it many times before and maybe I didn't mean it, but I do. You know I do.
I have to write this because you'd interrupt me if I spoke and this way I can say everything I need to.
So all that is left to say is,
Larissa Carina Black, you are my cousin, and therefore my family and I love you. I always will please know that. Goodbye.'
Larissa folded up the letter and put it in her pocket, she walked up to her dorm, not in the slightest bit hungry anymore. She was strangely able to control her tears until she laid fell down on her bed.
It was unknown to her how long she had laid there, but when she got up, the stars had come out and her face was completely dry, no more tears spilled, even though she knew that this was her fault and she had done this.
She calmly sat up and went into the bathroom and splashed her face with cold water. Her eyes were red, and her hair straggly from it having been pushed out of her face and her fingers run through it too many times in the past hour or so.
Larissa opened the cabinet under the sink to get out her shampoo when her eye caught a glisten. She took a sharp intake of breath as she saw it, laying there, so ready, so waiting...
She picked it up and watched as the light reflected off of it, and mini rainbows we mirrored onto the walls through the water drops on her eye lashes, not tears though. No, no more tears. She promised herself no more tears, not for him, not for anyone, not even herself, and to prove it she cut along a healing cut on her arm and the blood spilled over the floor, the pain was terrible but tears didn't even well up in her eyes. Only weak people cried, and she wasn't weak. She was, after all, the daughter of Bellatrix and Sirius Black, no she wasn't weak, but the thought of her parents made her cut deeper and clench the glass tighter. That was, after all, her fault too.
It was a few hours more before she immerged from the bathroom, her eyes weren't red, her hair was shiny, and there wasn't even a droplet of blood anywhere on her body at all. She was showered and hair washed, dry again and dressed in fresh clothes. She didn't go far, instead grabbed a book and went down to the common room and curled up in an arm chair under a blanket.
And for a while, she didn't have any of her troubles, or heart ache, she was in a world where none of that mattered. Where there were princesses and pirate ships and the kind of thing that Muggle children dream of, the kind of life with adventures and true love and friendship greater than any before, the kind of life she had dreamt of having here at Hogwarts. But no life is perfect, for even though Hogwarts was the place she felt the most safe, it was also the place she was the most in danger, if not from others, but a danger to herself.
A/N: =-O
That is all. Lol no.
Soooo...?
If you can find it in your heart to review after how horrible I've been leaving you for a month then that would make my day...
-She who is so very sorry, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx