Author's Note: I am totally and completely unmotivated today, but at least it's Friday. It is way, way too cold to venture out into the universe, so I suppose I'll just clean the house, do some dishes, and write some fanfiction.

Thanks so much to everyone who is reading and taking the time to comment. Reading your thoughts and commentary always makes my day just that much better. I hope you don't mind too much if I respond to your reviews; I've always felt strongly about acknowledging people who go out of their way to leave a comment. I want you to know that I appreciate you, because I do! I really do.

Chapter Five

Meanwhile, in Rarohenga, Maui was starting to get bored of his underwater prison.

Hine-nui-te-po, aware that demigods, unlike the dead, sometimes had to eat, had set up a meal service that she ordered delivered to the throne room three times a day. The meals were brought by Hine-nui-te-po's Turehu, spirits of dead maidens who served as ladies-in-waiting to the goddess of the dead. As far as Maui could make out, they were the only ones who were permitted to pass freely in and out of Rarohenga, and they were responsible for ushering the souls of the newly deceased into the spirit realm.

The woman who brought Maui's food today was a new spirit whom he'd never seen before. She was fair-haired, maybe in her forties, and her brow, jaw, and hands were decorated all over with tattoos of flickering flames and blazing embers, all indications that she'd died in some kind of terrible fire. Even her woven robes glowed the red/gold colors of an inferno.

Before presenting Maui with his bowl of small white fish garnished with some kind of tangy seaweed that tasted better than it smelled, the woman tied Maui's ankles together with a very thick, knotted rope. Then she unshackled one of his wrists, but left the other one attached to the throne room wall, so that Maui could eat, but was still essentially incapacitated.

While Maui scarfed down the fish, he watched the woman out of the corner of his eye. She had drifted over to where his hook hung on the wall and was gazing at it with fingers itching at her sides, obviously fascinated. Maui thought he recognized the signs, and he pushed his feet experimentally against his bonds, testing to see how strong the ropes really were.

"You can take it down, if you like," he told her. "It won't hurt you. I mean, as long as you don't cut yourself on it, or anything."

The woman flashed him a quick, sharp look, then bit her lip.

Maui smiled.

"Let me guess," he hazarded. "You're….what, twenty three? Twenty four?"

The woman blushed, which wasn't something Maui usually saw from the colorless spirits of the dead.

"So your grandma," he went on, "or maybe your grandpa, I don't want to discriminate, told you all kinds of stories of that fish hook and the fantastic feats of Maui, demigod of the wind and sea…and you're just itching to try it for yourself, am I right? Hey, look, you don't have to be shy. What's your name?"

He raised an eyebrow at her, beaming with godly warmth and friendliness, and the woman noticeably melted a bit, becoming just a little more noticeably human. She almost gave him a smile.

"My name is Ngaire," she told him, and her voice was shriller and more brittle than he'd expected from a healthy-looking woman like her.

Well…maybe "healthy" isn't the right word in this context, Maui reminded himself. What am I looking for…fit? Robust? No, you can't call a woman "robust." Nevermind, forget it.

"It was my mother," she explained, "who told me the stories of Maui the trickster demigod; the one who brought fire to the world and who created the coconut."

Maui basked in the glow of her admiration, reflecting that it was really nice, for once, to be appreciated.

"Well, I mean, I didn't actually create the coconut," he demurred, grinning. "It's more like I, uh, grew the first one. I was the first coconut farmer, or something like that. Anyway, you're welcome."

Ngaire was gazing hopefully at the fishhook again, and this time she was bold enough to reach out and to run a finger lightly over the edge of the blade.

"H-hey be careful," laughed Maui. "It's still sharp, okay? I've kept that thing sharp for thousands of years. It's still a weapon."

"I've heard every single one of your stories" Ngaire went on, nodding slowly. "You were…an important part of my childhood. Seeing you here…it reminds me of my mother, and of my island, my home. Yours were always the bedtime stories that she told us to keep us from wandering off into the woods at night; stories exciting enough that we'd forget that we weren't tired. You helped me fall asleep for years."

Now, Maui was sure that he had her. Settling back against the wall, he nodded encouragingly.

"That's great…that's really nice to hear, actually," he sighed. "I mean, I'll be honest with you; I was beginning to think that maybe people were starting to forget about little old Maui, the bygone demigod. I'm sure happy to hear that the old storytelling traditions are still being kept up, I really am! Hey, you know what? I bet there's one Maui story that you haven't heard yet. Most people haven't. It's not one that I tell to just anybody, but there's something about you, Ngaire…something special. Oh, go on, take the hook down. Give it a swing. I won't tell anybody, I promise; Maui's honor."

Ngaire darted a quick sharp look at him, hesitated for another moment, then exhaled abruptly and snatched the hook off the wall. She held it reverently in front of her, her mouth slightly open.

"Once upon a time," Maui began, never taking his eyes off Ngaire's face as he spoke, "only a couple of thousand years ago, Maui the demigod, shapeshifter and hero to men and women everywhere decided he was going to try to steal immortality…for the mortals."

Right on cue, Ngaire's eyes widened and she sucked in a surprised breath. Maui kept right on talking casually, pretending he hadn't noticed.

"The only thing standing between humans and immortality is, well, death, right? So, naturally, I strolled down to Rarohenga and tried to reason with her majesty, Hine-nui-te-po. I argued that she should give up the whole "herding the spirits of the dead" thing and maybe try broadening her horizons. I, uh…well, to make a long story short, I asked her out. I even took her to a few pretty good parties on some of the surrounding islands, got her to spread her wings a little bit, to see the world. Not to brag, or anything, but I showed her a really good time."

Ngaire had taken a few steps closer to Maui while he was speaking, until she was only inches away from him, still clutching the hook in both hands.

"You…you dated the goddess of death?" She looked and sounded shocked.

Maui just shrugged. "Oh yeah…me and Hine-nui-te-po, we go way back. That's why she's still so crazy about me. She had a taste, and she wanted more. I mean, not that I blame her, or anything. Who could resist this?" He tried to flex, but remembered at the last second that one of his arms was still shackled to the wall, and so he only managed to show off one set of tattoo—covered muscles. "We went out for a few weeks," he explained, "but I'll tell you the truth – what I really wanted was for her to spill the beans. I was trying to find out the secret to immortality, and I was hoping that if she got cozy enough with me, she might be ready to confide in me, to give me some insider info. Unfortunately…it never happened."

Ngaire was now so close that Maui could almost touch her.

"Oh," she breathed. "Why not?"

"Well…things got a little complicated between us," Maui sighed, "especially after she caught me flirting with one of the Turehu and asking too many questions about immortality and the secret to life. She figured out pretty quickly what I was really up to, aaaaaand then she got really angry and tried to kill me. You know what they say about a wronged woman, right? Anyway, I had to get out of there, fast, and that…well, that was supposed to be the end of the story. At least, it was until she caught with me again a few weeks ago. I'm gonna have a hard time getting out of this one, let me tell you. Can you believe she's still mad? It was like…well, more than a few lifetimes ago. Some people just can't get over a grudge."

Ngaire just shook her head slowly.

"You'll…you'll never get out of here alive," she assured Maui. "The goddess is right to be angry. You should be ashamed of what a horrible thing you did. There are consequences to breaking someone's heart. You can't just-!"

Suddenly, Maui swung out with his legs, slamming them hard into Ngaire's side. She shrieked, tumbled backwards, and released the hook, which Maui grabbed in midair with his one free hand. Before Ngaire had a chance to get back up, Maui had severed his remaining shackles and the ropes around his ankles with the magical fish hook, and was already running full-tilt for the throne room door.

"Just remember," he called behind him to the stunned Ngaire, "that story's a secret between you and me, okay? Don't go telling everybody about it. It's not that I'm ashamed. It's just, that one's kind of…personal! You get what I'm saying? Chee-hu!"

Author's End Note:

Yep, Maui is definitely a fun character to write. Luckily, we'll get to see more of him now that Moana and he are so close to being in the same place! Stay tuned for their exciting reunion, as soon as I get a chance to start work on Chapter Six.