There's no doubt about it. You must love Walter. He is so innocent. Not knowing how bitchy life can be. He doesn't know how to hold grudges… he doesn't know how to hate… how to hurt… how to lie… he's a simple loving amazing kid… He deserves to be loved.

We all moved to the dining room, where everybody took his seat. Rhian and John sat in front of my parents, while dad and mum took their usual seating. Dad always made it a must for me to sit beside him. Like that he could control what I eat and what I don't… it was harder for me to ditch him off… but by time, I found ways…

'Daddy, can I siwt with Sewa?' Walter asked his father before he lifted him to reach the chair.

'If Sera doesn't mind, yes…' John asked as he looked at me.

I was too lost in thought… I was making all kinds of math in my head… how much to burn… how much to consume… how to hide… especially with the 'good doctor' in front of me… how to … purge later on… will laxatives help? Exercising? Diet remedies? I was playing with the cutlery making them in perfect line. I felt the need to have control and organisation in everything I did.

From the corner of his eyes, dad noticed that I wasn't paying attention. It was his line to get me back down to earth.

'Sera?' Dad asked.

'Yeah… sorry… was thinking…' I replied too quickly, while Walter came running beside me.

'Can I siwt beside you Sewa? Pwease?' Walter asked.

'Yes sweety… Here, let me help you up.' I replied as I lifted him off to his chair.

The table was set full of food. There was roasted chicken, potatoes, boiled veggies, eggs… anything you could think of. They started passing around the food from mum, to John to Rhian, to Walter, me and dad… till the cycle starts again. I helped Walter in choosing what foods he wants, and it amazed me that a 5 year old wanted meat… I was always a picky eater, and still remember that I never wanted meat.

I took few spoons of boiled veggies, and some couscous. Everybody was busy digging in his dinner, however talking wasn't scarce. However at one moment all the attention was brought to me.

'Sewa, can I have youw potatoews pwease?'

'Yes Walter.' I replied smiling as I gave him my food, while Rhian noticed that I didn't have any meat on my plate.

'You haven't had any chicken Sera. It's very good.'

'Um… I don't eat meat anymore… I'm a vegetarian.' I replied back as I looked down at my plate.

'Mommy…' Walter started. 'I don't want to eat the vegetables.' He stated.

'Why not Walter?' His father asked.

'Becausew, I'm a chicken alien.' He answered back with his sparkling eyes, while we laughed it off. His innocence was so pure!.

'If you eat your veggies, I'll give you a piece of chocolate.' I replied showing him the bar that I had kept for him.

'Owkey … I'm not a chicken alien anymowe daddy…' He replied again as he dug in his veggies and I handed him his chocolate.

'Is there something wrong with your food?' Dad asked.

'No…' I replied hastily.

'Then why are you playing with your food?' He insisted getting on his nerves.

'I'm not playing…'

'Then eat it Sera…' Dad ordered.

I could feel dad still staring at me… and my mother's face turned into a sad expression. I hated that my mother is affected like this. On the other side, I could see John crossing his arms and making mental notes. I grabbed my fork and started cutting my food into smaller pieces. I made sure on not touching the fork to my lips. I needed to do some things in a ritual… they were consuming and tiring… but I couldn't stop… I didn't want to stop… I felt better…

The night was followed with more talking, and discussions with the adults during dinner. After almost an hour, I decided to call it a day, and left my half untouched food there.

'Can I be excused?' I asked softly.

'Leave an hour or so…' Mum suggested.

'What? You think I'm going to …' I started as I covered Walter's ears. '… throw up?' I continued and uncovered Walter's ears. 'I need to pee mum, to be exact.'

'Ok… then… just don't take long…' Dad stated, as I got up and made my way upstairs to the bathroom.

'She didn't even touch anything.' Mum stated.

'Bring her in for the next session…' John told dad. '…I'd like to have a private session with her.'

'She doesn't want to…'

'Ana, unfortunately it's out of her control… you are her legal guardians… you need to treat this at the core.'

I closed and locked the bathroom door, removing the key and placed it on the cabinet. I started the water bath, just in case anyone was passing by. I lifted the toilet seat, and trusted my fingers deep in my throat.

I felt my stomach being tore into 1000's piece. I squeezed my eyes shut, and let the food come up. I did it again and again, feeling my throat sore each and every time. Tears where coming out of my eyes, but I still did it and continued with it. I felt my nose becoming congested, and I felt my head throbbing, but still didn't stop, until I felt that I couldn't bring anything up any more.

I flushed down the toilet and slid down to the cabinet. I cried on what I did… it is physically and mentally exhausting. My stomach was aching… my throat was burning and my head was throbbing. I cried a bit on all the pain I was having… however, I quickly decided to brush it off. I washed my face with cold chilling water. I rinsed my mouth and brushed them quickly with a toothbrush I found available… before I went out, I made sure that I left everything clean… no traces of what I did… no traces of anything…

I felt light headed, but pulled my crap together and made my way back downstairs. My parents stood dumbstruck in the dining hall, looking at me… I made my way back to my seat, although I was quite shaky.

'You ok?' Dad asked suspicious.

'Yeah…' I smiled … 'Why?'

'Nothing…' He replied as he held both my hands. 'You're cold…'

'Yeah… It's December dad…' I replied jokingly.

'I'll bring you a cardigan.' My mother replied as she left the room, getting me one of her comfortable cotton cardigans.

All 4 adults decided to take in their evening into the living room. They continued talking about many things. My mother and Rhian discussed interior decorations and work…kids and how times are changing… clothing and everything… while on the other hand, my father and John discussed work, and sometimes they were talking in a subtle manner that I couldn't comprehend what they were saying.

I spent my evening with Walter… playing… lifting him up… tickling him… taking his nose… doing anything that he enjoyed…

'Sewa catch me!' Walter said again as he ran around the room.

'Walter, slow down! You're going to break something!' Rhian scolded.

'He's a kid… let him have some fun.' Mum smiled at him.

All that running was getting me tired and dizzy… At one moment I felt black dots messing up with my vision. I stopped for a second holding on to the table. Walter wasn't that young to notice that something was wrong, and as he saw me leaning to the table, he came back.

'Sewa, awe you alwight?' He asked looking scared.

'Yeah… I'm fine sweety…' I said again as I held stronger to the table.

Walter went straight running to his father and pointed to me. Both couples looked to where I stood. Dad noticed that I was about to faint. He came running to me immediately for support. Of all days to get this dizzy, it had to be today?

'Peanut, are you ok?' Dad asked as he held me from my shoulders.

'Yeah… just got tired from all the running… my feet are killing me…' I said coming with what seemed a suitable lie.

I let go of the table, but I felt my body was about to crumble to the floor. Dad held me immediately and took me out of the living room back to the kitchen. He sat me down slowly, and dismissed Gail to let us have a moment. He put the kettle on and came back to where I was.

'How are you feeling?'

'Ok… I guess.'

'Stop trying to put up a face… You were about to faint.' Dad continued as he took out a mug as some jar from which he took two teaspoons off.

'What is that?'

'Some sugar…' Dad replied. '…I think your blood glucose level has just dropped.'

'Dad….'

'Don't tell me you don't need this.' Dad cut me off while he poured the water. 'I'm not moving from here until you drink this.'

I didn't feel like arguing and finally gave in. I took the mug from his hand, and brought it to my lips. It was warm, and the first sip I took, had already made me feel better, and all warm inside.

'It's good…' I replied smiling.

'I told you…' Dad replied as he turned facing me while resting his back to the cupboard. 'Finish it peanut.'

After few minutes time, I drank the whole warm liquid. It was sweet, but very good… I felt warm inside, and the empty pit in my stomach was kind off filled. Dad was still staring at me… his face was filled with worry… and something I rarely saw… fear… I decided to break the ice.

'Finished.' I replied.

'How are you feeling?'

'Better…' I smiled.

'Peanut, what's eating you?'

'Nothing daddy…' I replied while playing with my hands. 'I'm fine…'

'At least, if you don't want to talk to me, talk to your mother!'

'Daddy… I'm fine… Really.'

'Ok…' He said deciding to leave everything as it is for now. 'Do you feel up to go back and join the others?'

'Do I have too?' I asked weakly while leaning on the chair.

'Walter was scared… at least for him, to show him you're better.'

'Ok… for Walter…' I replied.

'Can you walk?' He asked helping me up.

'Dad I'm fine… really… stop fussing! I smiled, as I let him hug me. 'I love you daddy… you know that… right?'

'Yes sweetheart… I know it.' He replied again kissing my forehead. 'Now let's go back… before your mother gets worried.'

As we went back to the living room, dad was still holding me from my shoulders. Walter was sitting down on the floor playing alone and staring everywhere. Flynn and his wife were discussing something with my mother in an undertone, but as Walter noticed I was there, he came running towards me.

'Sewwwaa!' He said as he jumped on me. 'Awe you bettew?'

'I'm fine sweety!' I answered back, until John came towards his son.

'Walter… take it easy!' He said as he took his son in his arms. '… how are you feeling Sera?'

'Good, thank you.' I replied quickly as I made my way to the couch and took a seat there, while Walter followed. Both men gave a warning look towards each other… I couldn't understand what was happening, but in any ways… I decided to let it go for the night… was already too tired…

After few minutes of playing with Walter, I was exhausted… and he was too. He lied down on my lap and slept, and it wasn't long till I joined him. I was in dream world in no time.

'John…' Rhian started as she smiled. 'They're so sweet…'

'We should leave.' John continued… 'Both slept…'

'You can stay if you want.' Dad answered back… 'It's not like we have a curfew…'

'True… but we'd rather get Walter into his bed, or else he won't sleep at night.' John continued. '…and from what it seems, Sera also needs her sleep.'

'Thanks for coming.' Ana said while John lifted off his son from my lap, jolting me up.

'Sorry for waking you up.'

'No worries.' I quickly answered, as I stood up. 'You going?'

'Yes… it's getting late honey.' Rhian continued. 'We should invite you next time… What do you say about next Saturday?'

'Sound great.' Dad replied, as he shook hands with John and my mother exchanged hugs and kisses with Rhian. 'Next Saturday then.'

Rhian came forward and hugged me and kissed me. 'Take care of yourself dear.'

'Will do.' I smiled, while John came forward and hugged me as well.

As they left, I helped mum, clearing last few glasses, till dad came back, and it wasn't long till he joined us.

'Mum, I'm going to my room.'

'Ok sweetheart.' She replied, until dad stopped me.

'How are you feeling?'

'Sleepy dad.'

'Ok, peanut… good night then.' He replied as they both hugged me and kissed me good night.