~I should've kissed you there
I should've held your face
I should've watched those eyes
Instead of run in place
I should've called you out
I should've said your name
I should've turned around
I should've looked again...~
***Pizza Pit, 8pm***
Camila's P.O.V.
Gosh it's cold out, pizza, thank goodness. I am beyond starving! Jerrod and I made our way into the pizza place and I see the hockey team in the corner, GREAT. That's right, they just had a game and by the look on their faces, they must have won again. I am really NOT in the mood to see Lauren; she's been pretty good at dodging me, even in study hall. It's worse than I thought; she's with Cece, of course. Our eyes met for a split second; I've missed her green eyes so much, it kills me to look at them.
"Camila," he tugged at my jacket. "I found us a table at the corner."
"We have to order up front." I gestured towards the register.
I REALLY don't want to order, the register is right by the team; I can't even deal right now! I could feel myself get anxious; I need to step away for a second.
"I need to use the restroom, can you just order me something." I headed towards the restroom.
Lauren's P.O.V.
Tonight's game was well-fought, great win. I'm just not as happy as I normally would be after a win. I'm not really sure why and then I saw HER walk in and I was reminded WHY. I've managed to avoid her the last week at school, but the pizza joint, the pizza joint would be my downfall. Thanks a lot universe.
"You okay Laur?" Dinah whispered in my ear to my left.
"I'm fine." I lied; shoot me.
The team kept talking about the game; I'm sure I should be basking in my glory, but I couldn't focus, not with them on the other side.
I see him approaching the register; where did Camz go? I couldn't help but overhear what he was ordering.
"Could I get two slices of the spinach and two slices of the veggie?" I heard him order.
Spinach? Veggie? She doesn't even like THOSE, but you wouldn't KNOW that now would you. I do, I know. I REALLY want to punch this guy.
~But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made
I'm staring at the mess I made.
I'm staring at the mess I made
As you turn you take your heart and walk away~
Camila's P.O.V.
I took my coat off and sat back down on the table across from Jerrod, "did you order?"
"Yeah, they should be coming out soon." He said with a smile.
He's such a great guy, really nice and treats me well. BUT? No buts, not right now, I can't even think, I need food!
"Here you guys go, two veggie slices and two spinach slices." The nice man placed the pizza on the table.
So many toppings and he had to choose spinach, which I HATE and a veggie pizza, come on! At least he tried.
"Looks good." I said trying to figure out which one I should force down.
I love pizza, I do, but he couldn't have chosen pepperoni? As I continue to contemplate which slice to eat, I see the porcelain-skinned girl from my peripherals approach the table and she rudely threw a plate down with two slices of pepperoni on it.
Her intense green eyes looking into mine and then making their way to my date, "she likes pepperoni" she said coldly before turning to walk away, but then she stopped, turning back around, "oh, and she hates spinach, you should probably take note." Her tone was sharp as she stared right at him.
I watched her slam the door open and walk out; my eyes were wide and so was my mouth.
"What the heck was that all about?" Jerrod turned towards me.
"She's, um, she's…" I have no idea what just happened, "will you excuse me for just one second, I'll be right back." I got up off the booth and quickly made my way outside.
Lauren's P.O.V.
I walked outside, zipped up my letterman jacket and placed my hands in my pockets. It was freezing but I didn't care, I had to get out of there. I couldn't be in there for one more second; I couldn't see her with him. I just couldn't. . What I did in there probably wasn't the best thing to do, but I couldn't contain my emotions. When it comes to her, I just don't know anything anymore.
"A little passive aggressive don't you fucking think?" She yelled causing me to stop dead in my tracks.
She's pissed; I've never heard her curse before, definitely pissed.
I turned around and she had her hand rolled into balls of fists; I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out.
"What the hell is you problem?" She pushed my chest, "seriously, what the hell is your problem?" She pushed me again, tears forming in her eyes.
"Camila?" I looked into brown eyes I missed so much; they were different, full of anger and sadness.
"What? Seriously Lauren, what the hell is your problem?" Her tears slowly poured down.
"Where's your coat?" I speedily approached her and wrapped my arms around her.
"No! Let me go Lauren."
I couldn't let her go, the more she fought it, the tighter I held her in my arms and truth was I didn't WANT to let her go.
"It's not fair Lauren, you can't do that." She cried into my chest, "you can't tell me to be with someone else and then just do that." I feel her arms wrap around me as she continued to sob. "It's not fair, you've avoided me all week and then you do THAT." She whimpered out.
"You have to go back inside now, okay?" I said with as much power as I could, which wasn't much.
"It's not fair," her voice barely audible through her tears. "You can't do that."
I pulled away, breaking our embrace and unzipped my jacket, took it off and threw it around her.
"Go back inside Camila, he's waiting for you." I could feel the tears building in my eyes and I didn't want her to see me this way, not this way. "Go back inside." I looked into her runny brown eyes and all I wanted to do was hold her, but instead I walked away.
~I should've held my ground
I could've been redeemed
For every second chance
That changed it's mind on me
I should've spoken up
I should've proudly claimed
That all my heads to blame
For all my heart's mistakes~
Camila's P.O.V.
I feel hollow, there's really no other word to describe how I feel and it's been days since I've slept. My eyes are heavy and I hope no one notices the bags under them. How could she tell me there's NOTHING between us, that I should be with someone else and then do THAT. She just leaves me so unbalanced, I don't understand her at all.
"Hey Mila!" I hear a cheery voice call out.
"Hey Ally." I said as I grabbed my books out of my locker.
"What's your schedule looking like? Hopefully we ACTUALLY have class this quarter together!" She beamed.
"Hmm lets see I've got: Poetry, Art, Math, Physics, Bio and English. What about you?" I said to her unenthusiastically.
No more study hall, no more seeing Lauren, not that I saw much of her anymore. She's been really good at ditching study hall or avoiding me, whichever it was, I wasn't really sure; I guess athletes get a free pass in this school. Call me crazy, but even though it hurt, I looked forward to seeing her everyday, but after the Pizza Pit incident, she hasn't shown up for study hall. I haven't looked into those green eyes the last two weeks. Well now that it's a new quarter I probably wont be seeing her at all, especially with league play starting for hockey and knowing Lauren she's figured out a way to avoid having me for any of her classes.
"Yay! We have Poetry AND Bio together!" She clapped happily, "come on Mila, wouldn't want to be late!"
~But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made
I'm staring at the mess I made.
I'm staring at the mess I made
As you turn you take your heart and walk away~
Ally and I sat in the front; all the athletes took the back seats. There sure are a lot of hockey players in here, probably because the Poetry teacher is the assistant coach of our women's ice hockey team; easy A for them, I'm sure. Dinah, Normani, ewww, even Cece, yeah I know she's not on the team, but she's like a blood sucking leech, always around them.
"All right class, settle down. Now, for your first assignmenttt-"
~SMACK~
Mrs. Tanner was interrupted by the door slamming open.
"Sorry I'm a little late coach," her husky voice let out softly as it invaded my ears causing chills throughout my body. "I to change my schedule around."
"Take a seat Jauregui."
Lauren made her way towards the back; I could feel my body tense up, as her green smoldering eyes looked into mine, just for a split second.
"Hey baby, I saved you a seat," Cece's annoying voice hollered.
God help me through this quarter. PLEASE.
Lauren's P.O.V.
I took my seat next to Cece; there was no getting away from her. Camila's in this class, you have got to be kidding me! What am going to do? I can't ditch THIS class, no way I can transfer out; coach will kill me. Universe, PLEASE help me through this quarter.
I couldn't help but stare at the back of her head. Her brown dark locks falling ever so gently down her back and her signature bow that I loved so much. I haven't been this close to her since the Pizza Pit; looking into her beautiful brown eyes made my heart ache. She looked so tired, different, like someone had stolen her sunshine…I know who stole it.
"Miss Jauregui! Did you hear me?"
"What?" The only thing I heard was my last name.
"Miss Cabello is your partner for the quarter. Lets see, who's next on the liiisss-"
I stood up. "NO!" I didn't realize how loud I had yelled until everyone's attention snapped towards me; brown eyes staring me down.
"Excuse me Miss Jauregui?" Mrs. Tanner said crossing her arms.
"I mean, wouldn't it make more sense for me to be with someone from the team? With our busy schedules and all; it'd be easier to get an assignment done." Don't look at her brown eyes that's staring at you; whatever you do, DO NOT LOOK INTO THOSE BROWN EYES.
~And it's you
And it's falling down
As you walk away
And it's on me now
As you go...~
"You know what Miss Jauregui, you're right it would be EASIER, but life isn't always easy. Take seat, you're with Camila, deal with it."
"Lauren!" I jumped at the sudden call of my name.
"What Dinah?" I pulled my sweater on.
"Dawg, you need to come into the hall NOW!" Her voice was urgent.
"What? Why?" I finally peeked on the other side of the locker to meet her gaze.
"Dude, it's Cece!" My eyes still bewildered, "If you don't get out there she's gonna eat Camila alive!"
All I needed to hear was Camila's name and I bolted out the locker room as fast as I can. I'm running down the hall and all I see is a group of people clustered and Cece's voice yelling.
I push my way through, "I-I-I didn't mean to, it was an accident, I'm sorry." Her voice low, trailing off at the last part as she picked up her books.
"You know what charity case, you think you can just come in here and act like the world owes you something," Cece spat, "you really need to watch where you're going!" she got in Camila's face.
I need to do something. I need to do something or Cece is going to do something bad and I can't let that happen. Come one brain…THINK!
"Hey baby," I pulled Cece into my arms and I could feel brown eyes on me, "What's going on?" Cece just smiled. Probably because I've NEVER called her any endearing name and I've NEVER showed her any affection.
She wrapped her arms around my neck, "this commoner ran into me, knocked my drink out of my hands!" She glared at Camila venomously; my eyes followed her direction and met soft brown eyes; I knew she was holding back tears.
Cece, being Cece tried pull out of my arms to yell at Camila some more and I wasn't going to let that happen. I tugged her arm, spinning her back into my embrace. "She's not even worth it babe. She's just a commoner, not even worth our time." Cece just smiled and I watched the tears fall from Camila's face form the corner of my eyes before she turned to walk away.
All I wanted to do was run after her, run after her and tell her she was worth it. She was worth MY time and that I loved her. That I'm IN-LOVE with her, but I didn't; I think I'm gonna throw up.
~But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made
I'm staring at the mess I made.
I'm staring at the mess I made
As you turn you take your heart and walk away~
It was after practice and I walked out, threw my gear in my trunk and there she was, walking, I'm not sure towards what, but she was walking. I need to talk to her.
"Camila!" I yelled as I jogged to catch up to her, "Camila!" Can she not hear me? She's not stopping.
"CAMZ!" I finally caught up to her and grabbed her elbow.
She turned around, angry brown orbs meeting mine as she pushed my hand away. "WHAT? What Lauren? What the hell do you want?"
"…I just, I just…"
"You just what?" her eyes beginning to water, "you probably can't even get the words out because I'm just a FUCKING COMMONER!" she pushed me away, her tears flowing freely. "And I'm not even worth your time right?" she said in between her sobs. "Well don't you worry Lauren, I don't WANT your time."
But you are WORTH it Camz, you always have been and always will be; I'm the one not WORTHY of YOU.
It's what I wanted to say, but the words wouldn't come out.
~And it's falling down
As you walk away
And it's on me now
As you go...~
"I DON'T want to be a part of YOUR world, not anymore," she said as she wiped her tears with her hands, "I DON'T WANT YOU ANYMORE, so don't you worry."
I just stood there, frozen, unable to say anything and I just let her walk away…AGAIN.
~But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made
I'm staring at the mess I made.
I'm staring at the mess I made
As you turn you take your heart and walk away~