Let it go, let it go

Can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, let it go

Turn away and slam the door

I don't care

What they're going to say

~taken from "Let it Go" from the movie "Frozen"

I don't know what to say. There's nothing that I can say that will remove the growing look of dread spreading across his face. I try my best to stand, but he pushes me back down gently and steps away. I remain on the floor, watching him.

"Hermione," he whispers, eyes dancing over my body, my hands remaining firmly on my stomach. I wait with bated breath for him to say something more but nothing ever comes.

I should've told him before so he wouldn't find out like this but there's nothing I can do about that now. I can only deal with the situation at hand. Again I struggle into a standing position, and this time he doesn't stop me.

I can feel my eyes getting wet, an overwhelming sense of dread setting in as I look at his horrified face. I knew he wouldn't like this when I finally told him, but I'm beginning to think the look on his face is edging towards disgust.

"Surprise," I whisper in return, unable to hold his gaze. "We're going to have a baby."

I have to admit that I thought Draco would have something to say when I broke the news to him. Instead he's been silent, keeping an expressionless facade up as we dress and return to the room.

We've been silent for what feels like forever now, and I have yet to come up with a groundbreaking statement that will start up conversation again. For all I know anything I might say could send him off the handle in a fit of rage or fear or hurt.

I don't know what he's thinking right now. There were too many mixed emotions on his face in the bathroom, and since he hasn't let a single emotion show through. He did however heal my shoulder before leaving the bathroom, the gentle guy. He even cradled my stomach as we walked to the bed, as though he was afraid of being hurt.

At least that's a sign that he's probably not repulsed. I just wish I knew what he was thinking.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asks, his voice coming out soft and hurt. I'm surprised by the sudden start of conversation and whip my head around to look at him. But he won't even look my way. The mask is still up, hiding his reactions.

I shrug opening and then closing my mouth. I'm at a loss of words; I don't know what to say. I was hoping I would have more time to prepare myself.

"Why didn't you just tell me Hermione?" he asks again, looking at me now. I fall apart under that intense look.

"What was I supposed to say?" I whisper, fiddling with my fingers. "That we have a supernatural baby on the way who may or may not possess my curse and who is coming at a very difficult time?"

He doesn't react to my speech just continues speaking in that dreary tone. "How long have you known?"

I hesitate. "For a while now. I was waiting for the proper time to tell you."

"You should've told me from the beginning," he grumbles, shaking his head. "You should've told me the moment you found out Hermione. A child is something else Nott or whoever this is might go after."

"I doubt that anyone else knows that I'm pregnant," I reply, glancing down at the sheets. "It was a secret from pretty much everyone."

He nods, but he doesn't look any happier than he did before. "Has it been long? I suppose it can't have been too long- you're not even showing yet."

"There's a lot of time before the baby will ever come," I remark, trying to ease his mind however I can. "By that time this siren nonsense should be over with and the people trying to hurt me will be long gone."

"They best be," he mutters, glancing at my belly. I feel an overwhelming sense of protection through that look. Now that he knows about the child he will feel even more compelled to protect me.

As if he wasn't stressing himself out enough.

I scoot closer to him on the bed, and he accepts my presence with an arm draped over my shoulders, pulling me closer. His opposite hand comes to rest on my stomach and it's a rather odd feeling. People haven't really started touching my belly yet.

"You should have told me," he whispers, his chin resting against my shoulder. "I wouldn't have done such silly things in the shower."

"I know," I whisper back. "I should have told you before we came to the Manor, before more stress was added on. I guess I'm just making poor decisions lately."

"Don't say that," he mutters, remaining where he is. "It's a hard thing to tell someone."

I arch an eyebrow, wondering where those bull-headed siren-traits went. Draco hasn't always been the most cool-headed person since this thing began. I was expecting more… emotion.

"You're not mad that I didn't tell you?"

He looks at me directly then, his hand drifting from my stomach to my chin to hold my gaze. "I'm not mad about anything Hermione. You just have to give me time to adjust to this idea. I'm not sure how to react at this point."

It's understandable, I just wish it wasn't so. I want a hug, encouragement, something, but not bleak acceptance. I don't quite know how to handle his reaction.

But this is the initial reaction. He could still believe I'm bluffing for all I know. Then again, why would I joke about this?

We don't speak again. I begin to drift off to sleep and he silently adjusts our position so I can lean on him. There are so many things I want to say before I go to sleep but I just can't, not tonight.

The day's been stressful enough. We can suffer from more of that tomorrow.

I'm alone when I wake next. It's not morning and the room is still startlingly dark. But when I reach out my hand doesn't connect with another person, and I realize Draco has left the bed. If I start thinking about why my mind's going to come to some terrible assumptions that are impossible. Instead of wondering I simply get out of bed, brushing off my clothing as I grab my wand.

He keeps his room so very dark. I wonder if it's always been like this.

After a quick search of the room I discover that he's nowhere to be found. Swallowing the lump in my throat I dare to step out into the corridor of this ancient home, a home that once locked me away so villains could torture me. Wandering the corridors alone- at night no less- really isn't something on my to-do list but curiosity has the best of me.

I just dropped a bomb on Draco's shoulders. I don't know why I'm acting so surprised that he can't sleep, but I probably shouldn't pry. If he left the bedroom he obviously needs some time alone.

"You can't tell me what to do," a voice hisses, catching me off guard. I hadn't realized that I'd gotten so close to people. "You're not in charge of everything in Malfoy Manor yet Draco."

Lucius Malfoy. I'd know that voice anywhere. I just find it odd that Draco went to his father when he needed advice. Or maybe Malfoy senior just found him wandering the halls.

"Matters are more difficult now father. I'm not requesting this just because of Hermione anymore. It's for our safety as well."

Someone scoffs, and I suppose it can be none other than Draco's father. "Our safety? What about our reputation Draco?! Your mother and I raised you to honor the Malfoy name. You're doing the exact opposite of that now."

"And I wouldn't take any of it back," he replies as I continue stepping closer. "Father in the beginning I wanted nothing to do with this, with her, but as time went on my attitude changed. I've grown to love her, and the bond we have through the situation only makes our affection more obvious to me. Thing's need to be settled while we are here for break, not be ruined while we are here. I'm simply saying no guests should be allowed."

Lucius chuckles dark and low. "I don't have to listen to the rules my son sets up. I am still your senior, I am still your father. And if you intend to shove the Mudblood-"

"Don't call her that!" Draco bellows as I stop beside a corner. Their voices are quite loud now, echoing off the high ceilings of the Manor. "You might not like this father but it's the way things are going to be. Nothing will change that now. But you will not continue using that terrible name when addressing her."

There's silence for a moment and I chance a glance around the wall. Draco's got his back to me, but I can see Lucius rolling his eyes.

"If you so intend on doing this to yourself Draco then you must be ready for ridicule. Our friends and family will not so easily accept her, even if you have. I don't even accept her!"

"I never expected you to father, that would be hoping for too much. But she is going to stay now. There's nothing that will change that. There are dozens and dozens of families I'll have to defend her against father, people who would rather Crucio her than stand in the same room beside her."

"I am most aware Draco."

"I have enough to deal with father, I don't need your harassment on top of it all. For the next few days the Manor won't have any guests. We need time to sort things out before everything gets out."

"Enough has already gotten out," Lucius replies scornfully, throwing his long blond hair over his shoulder. The moonlight from a high window catches the old scars on his skin, causing them to glow. It's a rather terrifying picture.

I pull back to hide behind the wall again, continuing to be a silent ease-dropper. So long as they haven't noticed me and my dimly lit wand then I have nothing to worry about. I'm certain they wouldn't continue this conversation if they knew I was here. It seems like a private affair.

"Are you afraid for her safety?" Lucius continues. "She might be a M- a lesser blood, but she's a fine duelist. She must know how to defend herself in this life Draco or someone will easily end her."

"I'm not as concerned about that father, just what we can't control. I stand by what I've said. No guests. It's best that things are dealt with only family first before the news gets out."

There's a pause and I quirk an eyebrow. Draco's referring to the baby.

"The news about you and that girl? It might be startling Draco but I don't think people would immediately jump up and try to kill her. They would wait for a less obvious time at least."

So Draco didn't tell his father the news. I'm not surprised by that.

"It's getting late," my boyfriend says, turning the conversation away from its topic. "You should sleep father."

"You know I don't sleep," Lucius replies sarcastically. Footsteps move closer and I back away, slipping into the shadows as I extinguish my wand. "You're the one that needs sleep my boy. Maybe things will make sense in the morning."

Draco grumbles something I can't hear and then the two men step into the hallway. Lucius bids his son goodnight before turning in the opposite direction. I think it's the most civil I've ever seen that man.

I wonder how long they were talking for?

Minutes pass as Draco just stands there, staring at the wall. Then he turns and heads back down the hallway he was speaking to Lucius in. I peer around the corner once more, watching him go.

He doesn't walk far. He stops by a window and looks out, his blond locks hiding his expression.

I leave him like that, wandering back to the room. I could go and pester him, but not tonight. It looks like he has enough on his mind.

Besides, we're going to be here a few days. There will be plenty of time for questions.

The following morning we shower together and it's a silent affair. His eyes flit down to my stomach every couple seconds, and each time that I try to begin conversation he doesn't respond. It's more than a bit frustrating- I really want to know what's on his mind.

Breakfast is just as uncomfortable. Lucius and Narcissa keep sending me odd looks like they know something they shouldn't and Draco's just stirring his food around with his fork, lost in thought. I eat everything on my plate in an attempt to avoid looking at anyone too much through the silence.

It's the exact opposite of last night's dinner.

After breakfast Narcissa surprisingly requests my audience in the parlor. Her wording is a bit too formal for me but I accept the invitation before leaving the dining room.

"Mother wants to see you?" Draco asks as we wander back to his room. I raise an eyebrow. It's the first thing he's actually said to me all morning.

"Yes, but I don't know what about. Your parents were sending me rather strange looks all throughout breakfast."

"They're just trying to figure things out Hermione."

"Just like you are?" I inquire, and he stops walking. Leaning back against the wall he arches an eyebrow at me, returning my previous expression.

"Well, aren't you? Hermione, a baby is just another rung in the ladder, and it makes you twice as vulnerable."

I roll my eyes. "Few people even know about the baby. Other than you and my parents I haven't told a soul."

"I'm aware of that. But that doesn't mean people won't figure it out over time. What if Nott's accomplices aren't apprehended for a while? When you start showing it will be obvious, and the danger will be that much greater. Threats can be made based off a child, even an unborn one."

His words hit hard, and I place my hands protectively over my stomach. "For now it's not a concern though. It shouldn't take that long to get everyone into custody. And once they are the danger is gone."

"No, that danger will be gone." A small smile pulls at my lips, his brows furrowed together in concern and frustration.

"There will always be other dangers Draco," I say, placing a hand on his cheek. He leans into my touch, closing his eyes. "It's inevitable. But if we try to take on everything at once we're just going to lose our minds. We can handle Theo and his father now. We can work with the upcoming baby as the weeks go on, and we can release the news when we're comfortable. Things won't be as bad as you think so long as we keep our heads up."

I'm partially giving myself this pep-talk as well. I'm having the same worries.

He opens his eyes, the grey orbs moving to meet mine. "I know, I just worry. There's a lot more than just those few things to handle."

"I know. Just take it one step at a time."

Draco nods, wrapping an arm around my waist. We continue down the hall, my heart beat picking up. I'm starting to feel a little guilty.

I feel like a hypocrite. I have those same fears.

She's perched in a chair reading, every single blond hair on her head in perfect position. Her eyes barely move across the pages of the book in her hands, and if I didn't know any better I might've mistaken her for a lifelike statue.

"Hello Miss Granger," she says, her voice calm and precise. It's nothing like the venomous way she spoke to me last night. I'm glad you came to see me."

I nod without speaking, taking a seat opposite her in the cozy room. She shuts her book and finally looks up at me, grey aged eyes shining in the sunlight of the single open window.

"You requested that I come," I reply, keeping my voice level. "But if you only requested me here to yell more profanities and convince me to leave then I will just be on my way. I don't have the patience to deal with anymore of that."

"I am not here to yell," she says, though her lip twitches. I can see that it's a bit difficult for her to speak to me so calmly. I truly was expecting her to scream. "But I felt it's time we talk."

"About?"

Her lip twitches again. "How long have you known about these… traits of yours?"

I frown. "Not long. I discovered them only weeks ago, with Draco around in fact. It came as quite a shock to me."

"Your mother never mentioned them before?" she presses, delving into my personal life. My frown deepens, wondering why she's so interested in the backstory.

"No, she happened to forget that detail of my life. I always thought my parents knew nothing of the magical world until I received my acceptance letter from Hogwarts but it appears that I was mistaken."

"I see. And you're sure Draco is truly your mate?"

"Trust me, there's no other way to explain the things that have happened."

She nods slowly, her fingers tapping lightly on the sofa. "And you do know the dangers that come from being a Siren?"

"What dangers?" I ask, faking surprise. I only want to know what she does.

"I've read the book that Draco mentioned at dinner. It was something that fascinated me while I was at Hogwarts, and each summer I re-read the book, hoping I might become one somehow."

"Trust me, you're not missing out on anything."

"So I've noticed. Being a Siren is a dangerous lifestyle, something I didn't know until I was a bit older and truly understood the darkness laden in the pages of that book. If someone was to know that you are a Siren it would endanger you greatly."

"I am aware."

"That's not the reason I requested you here though," she continues, folding her hands. I raise an eyebrow in response. "It's about something else that I hope you and Draco have not yet discussed."

"And what would that be?"

She pursed her lips once before speaking. "Children."

My eyes widen but otherwise I remain composed. Where is she going with this?

"And what of children Mrs. Malfoy."

"Children are a dangerous thing when beasts cross man," she said, leaning forward in her chair. "Once upon a time Siren's were devilish beasts who drowned men at sea, and now a siren's attraction is focused on finding a mate. Your ancestors may have evolved further than some of the ancient monstrosities, but not everything has changed."

"Meaning children."

"Yes. The offspring of a Siren can possibly possess the traits of a siren. And you have surely already discovered what might happen if a Siren doesn't find their mate. You were lucky to have found yours so easily, but your child may not be so lucky."

"What are you getting at?"

She straightens out then, looking directly into my eyes. "If you marry Draco and have children your children, my grandchildren might suffer the same torments and difficulties that the both of you have. Draco was always meant to produce a heir, and produce one he must. I'm just not so sure I want your traits tarnishing the family line."

I jump up from my chair, my cool composure slipping. "We have worked through a lot so far Narcissa," I say, dropping formalities, "And children will be something else to handle when the time comes. That time is too far off to even consider right now."

Narcissa glares at me, standing up. "So you say Hermione Granger. But right now the Malfoy line is not tarnished. It's one thing for Draco to lower himself down to marry a Mudblood, but to marry a monster?"

My wands out in a moment, but I force myself to remain where I am. "I am not going to dictate my relationship on something I cannot control. I didn't ask to be a Siren, and I didn't ask for Draco to be my mate either. But we've learned to cope and accept and maybe even like the situation. We're making the most of it, why can't you? I can tell you now that no matter what you say it won't change what is already set in motion. I'm still going to be with your son because he chose me."

"He didn't choose you," she corrects immediately, glaring daggers my way. "He was forced by some age old curses. There's a difference."

"It's not against his will you know. Draco has a choice! He could turn me away whenever he sees fit, but he doesn't, because he doesn't want to."

She's shaking now, and I can tell that I'm getting under her skin. She doesn't want me in this family, and she will try whatever way possible to get rid of me. I won't give her the satisfaction.

I have no intention of going anywhere. Not only do I love Draco, but I'm going to have a baby with him. Nothing could make me change my mind now.

"You should let your son choose his own life," I say, replacing my wand. "The times have changed and blood purity isn't everything it used to be. We chose to go along with what's happening to us, and we found happiness along the way. You shouldn't be so hasty to break something like that apart."

Before she can start another argument I leave the room. Of course I knew the Malfoy's were going to be unhappy from the start, I just didn't think they would immediately come after me.

I'm not going anywhere. I refuse to.

A/n: I'm not dead, I promise. I've had some life issues and lack of inspiration to deal with, but here's chapter 22. It's not exactly the most exciting chapter, but I didn't want to leave you with yet another cliffhanger.

I'm not abandoning this story by any means. It's just not going to be updated every week like it used to be. I just don't have the time to. And I will get back into my other stories as time allows.

Thanks to everyone who has stuck with this so far! It's really appreciated and motivated me to keep writing this even when I considered abandoning it. So big thanks!

Feel free to leave a review. They help me and sometimes they inspire writer's block.

Until the next chapter dearies!