This chapter is dedicated to Marion Mello, for her kind words and motivation, along for her support throughout these chapters :)... Thank you! :DD

Flynn's POV

I heard the toilet flush, and something in me stirred. I knew there was something wrong. I listened through the door, and heard a small heave. I opened the door... And there she was... On her knees as a slave. With one hand holding to the toilet seat as tight as she could, and with the other pushing down her throat. I went forward and removed her from doing anymore damage. I quickly flushed again, and moved her towards the sink. I rinsed her hand, but she still fought against me. I removed her glasses and placed them in my pocket. I thoroughly splashed water on her face and dried it immediately with a nearby towel. She pushed against me to go back to it… but I held her stronger.

'No please... I need to do it... please...' she begged.

'No Sera... No...' I replied again as I held her stronger.

'Please Flynn... Please...' she cried as she crumbled to the ground. I went down beside her and held her close to me... She needed affection... She needed someone to be there for her.

'No Sera... You need to keep what's left down...' I said again

'Please Flynn...' she said again as tried pushing me.

'Shhh... Relax... Shh... I'm here...' I held her stronger and rubbed her back gently. It wasn't supposed to affect me that way... But it did... The disease changed tactics... This was no longer the Sera I once knew... This was the anorexia talking... Sera was just defeated and crumbled... I thought if it was too late to save her...there was so much to do… She needed to realize that she had to get better... Rhian came through the door, and realized what just happened. She stood there dumbstruck at everything... I motioned her to give us some time. She knew what it meant when things got out of hand...

'Sera... Stop fighting me... I'm not letting you near the toilet...' I urged as I held her tighter. I felt her body lose the fight. She gave in and let me comfort her. I let her hair loose, and passed my fingers through her hair. Locks of curls were in my hand. She stared at my hand and kept feeling her hair. It was falling off at an alarming rate.

'You know…' she started in a weak voice. 'I haven't had a period in almost a year… My hair keeps falling off… and I know it's bad… but it doesn't scare me…' She continued as she passed her hand through her hair again, and more fell off. 'I don't comb my hair… I let it stay in its natural way to not have anymore loss… but it doesn't stop…'

'Sera, your body is trying to conserve the little nutrients you have left… you need to get back into therapy… you need to get better.' I insisted as I laid her down with her head on my lap. 'You've become infertile…'

'I never wanted to be fertile… My best friend keeps telling me about how her sex life is with her boyfriend… and the thought… that… I'm worthless… I'm used… makes me think how much I don't want to have anything to do with guys…' She started. 'I remember… when I started having my periods, I used to take cold showers… I believed that it would make blood clot, so I won't be having it… or it wouldn't come at its normal flow… It could have been January… and I still would have had freezing cold showers.

'…and how long has that been?'

'Since I was 12 or so?... I don't quite remember.'

'Sera, you have blocked many memories… it is normal to feel overwhelmed.'

'I don't feel overwhelmed… I'm just tired… I feel like I want to die… I would get out of this misery… It's constantly tiring… I have to do things the certain way… count everything… I want to stop… I really do… but I can't… I'm afraid.'

'What are you afraid of, Sera? Does anorexia represent who you are?'

She remained quiet. I knew the answer to the question. I only wanted her to answer, but she only kept quiet.

'Sera, tell me this… What do you see when you look in front of the mirror?'

Again, she remained quiet. Body Dysmorphia dominated in anorexic minds and Sera was very sick. 'Sera?' I asked again, as I squeezed her arm gently.

'I… I try to not look at mirrors anymore…'

'Why?'

'…because I look sick Flynn…'

'Sick how Sera?'

'Fat sick… I hate myself… I used to wonder why I wasn't perfect enough for my parents… and since… maybe… 5… 6 years ago I started controlling. I loved the feeling of hunger… I still do… It makes me feel alive… but I still see myself huge… I never look at my reflection. I'm ugly…'

'No you're not Sera… and you are nowhere near fat. What I'm trying to do is change your mirror…'

'… but what I see is true… I am fat… I feel fat…'

'No… it's what your anorexia wants to show you, and wants you to feel… You are not well Sera… you need to let me help you…'

'You talk about … about it as if it is some kind of another personality…'

'Sera, the anorexia tells you what to do… It is the illness… it is hard to explain it… only you feel it… only you can let me help you stop it.'

'I can't… I don't deserve it…' she said again as she started crying. Anorexics have very low self-esteem and very low feelings of self-worth, and because of that, they avoid really anything which pampers them or gives them pleasure a lot of the time. They tend to block anyone and everyone out to avoid building feelings, so they won't have to deal with any of the pain when it comes for departure. 'I think about…' She started, but she soon stopped.

'You think about what Sera?'

'Nothing…'

'You know you can tell me sweet heart!' I encouraged. 'I only want to help you.'

'I can't…'

'Why?'

'This thing inside my fucking head doesn't allow me… it constantly tells me what to do… It constantly tells me how to move... or what to frikkin feel… I hate it… but I don't want to stop… I can't stop this…'

'Why do you feel like that Sera? As you can see you're not having a lot of good effects from anorexia. It's only robbing your life slowly… and it already has consumed you…' I explained.

'…but like this… I won't have to deal with anything… I just push it back… and don't have to think… do you know how hard it is to watch my parents constantly fight? After Jason died, none of them went back to what they were… I hate them… and I hate that I want them… They think I don't know what happened that night… they think I'm still left in the dark about some stuff… but they don't realize that I know.'

'You know about Jason's death?' I asked confused. We had told her that he died in his sleep… knowing the truth would have crushed her.

'Yeah… I know all about the red room of frikkin torture… I know all about dad's sick obsession… He belted me when I once entered that fuckin room. He said that I had to follow the rules… yeah… like he kept to his… and look where it got my brother… 7 feet under the ground…'

'Christian didn't have an easy life…'

'Yeah… I know… Elena taught him the ropes… she got him where he is now… I sometimes think… what if I was a mistake? I mean… my mother always used contraception. What if she missed one and I was conceived by mistake? They wanted Jason. I still remember the discussions and paper work… and social service visits…'

'Ana wanted you very much…'

'Yeah… I can see that…' She sarcastically replied. '…and what about my father? You only mentioned my mother!'

'What else do you know about Jason's death?'

'Leila wanted dad. He was married to mum. Apparently she managed to pass all security cameras, and nobody noticed her entering. She knew about Jason, and came to the nursery.'

'You were there weren't you?' I asked. I now realized everything. They couldn't find Sera that night, and hours later, they found her in the closet in Jason's nursery. It was traumatizing for her to see her brother killed. How could I have missed that? This went way back since she was 12… This was far more serious.

I finally realized...

'It was that time you stopped calling me Uncle John...' I stated. I closed my eyes, and kept trying to see the bigger picture... Those were early signs... I missed them...

'I couldn't let you in... I kind of knew what your job entailed...' she whispered almost ashamed of herself. 'I couldn't let you in... I didn't want to let you in. I had to be a grown up... I didn't want to seem a pathetic weak girl...' she replied as I moved her closer to me. I decided to let that go off for the moment... And see what she knew about Jason's death...

'Do you remember what happened Sera?'

'I saw her grabbing him. I wanted to do something but I was such a coward to get out of there. All I wanted was to spend the night near Jason. I was so happy that I finally had someone to play with… someone to love and cuddle with… then my mum entered the room, because Jason was crying in Leila's arms. He was only three years old John… Three! Mum screamed for dad. He came running. She mumbled something about wanting him for herself… about being better from something… and she took it against dad at why he chose my mother rather than her… He begged her to leave Jason alone. He asked her to talk… he offered her money… he thinks that he can reach Heaven with money. He finally thought to give her what she wanted… I remember his words… he told her that he'll be hers only if she leaves Jason alone… and you know what she told him?' She asked.

'What Sera?'

'She told him, that we were a distraction. She took the gun and literally placed it to his head. She… she shot him cold…' She replied. I saw her close her eyes and cringed in pain. 'There… there was blood everywhere… a pool near his head…his… his body laid limp on the ground… his eyes remained open…' She said as she stood up immediately and when straight to the toilet. She threw up violently at the memories. I held her hair back, and let her get rid of everything. She wasn't making herself sick… it wasn't her fault. She experienced a traumatizing event that cost her, her childhood.

'Shh… relax…' I said again as I rubbed her back gently. 'She threw up everything… there was nothing left… She coughed violently. I brought her a tissue and while she held for support, I wiped her mouth. I helped her up to her feet, but I realized she had no strength. I guided her to the sink to rinse her mouth. She did it immediately, but she was getting paler by the minute. 'Sera, look at me.' I started. 'Answer me… are you feeling dizzy?' She simply nodded. She lost the entire little colour she had; it wouldn't have been long for her to collapse on me. I lifted her off and she didn't struggle at all. She was lighter than Derek… and that rang bells. I had to talk to Grace and Carrick. Medically, they excelled at it… I only had to be there for her… Christian and Ana didn't even realize that their daughter knew everything. I felt disgusted by their tock on things.

She almost slept in my arms. I took her straight to her room, and decided not to wake her up. Exhaustion took its toll on her. I took her to her room and I think for the first time she was going to use her bed. I covered her with the quilts. She was shivering. After I made sure she was sound asleep, I decided to retreat to my wife. It was still 10pm, and she was still waiting for me. I had to discuss this with her. She could talk to Ana… She knew how to handle this, woman to woman. All I knew was that they needed a huge wake up call. Their daughter is killing herself… and they don't notice. Sera was too depressed… and worst of all, we all let this go too far... It's been years that she had put it off... I still couldn't understand how Ana and Christian didn't see anything... If Walter and Derek had something, Rhian and I would have picked it up...

One thing was for sure. I wasn't going to allow this go on.

'John, is everything ok?' Rhian asked as she came forward and nuzzled into my chest.

'Sera knows...'

'Knows?' she asked confused. 'Knows what?'

'She knows about Christian's obsession... She knows about Jason's death... She saw it in front of her eyes...'

'What? I don't understand... She knows?'

'Yes Rhian... She knows...' I replied back as I hugged her to me. 'She just spilled her guts out... And I bet there's more to what she told me...'

'What are you going to do?' she asked gently.

'Talk to Christian and Ana for sure... Here, we both can keep an eye on her... When she's back home, we'll see if she keeps her improvement...'

'...and if not? John, you know how this goes by... She goes back to that environment and she'll only get worse...'

'Then we'll know what's making her like this... She needs a family...' I replied as I kissed Rhian's forehead. 'Will you be able to stay with her tomorrow? She doesn't have school. I checked her calendar.'

'Study day?' She asked.

'Mhmm...' I replied back. 'I can take her to work with me if you'd like.'

'No... I'll stay with her... We'll prepare a meal together... Then I'll take her shopping and I'll see how she reacts to everything...' Rhian replied. 'At least, I'll put my diplomas to a bit of use... Now let's get some sleep... It's going to be a long day tomorrow...' she smiled as she kissed me. We slept cuddling into each others arms. 'I love you Rhian...'

'I love you too honey...'

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