Chapter 2: My Friends

My friends are so depressed
I feel the question
Of your loneliness
Confide, 'cause I'll be on your side
You know I will, you know I will

-"My Friends" Red Hot Chili Peppers

"I'm sorry, but I'm going to need you to repeat what you just said." Serena flipped her golden mane over her shoulder and held her phone closer to her ear. "Blair told you that, and you just walked away? Like, without a word?" She batted her hand at the waiter to indicate she wasn't ready to order. Serena knew it was rude to talk on her phone in a restaurant (she was her mother's daughter, after all, and good manners were important in the VDW home), but this was too important to wait to talk about it. Her best friend and stepbrother's path had been a complicated one, one filled with hurt on both ends, and she felt some responsibility to keep them both as happy as possible. If that meant talking on her phone in a five-star restaurant, then she would do it.

"Chuck, that's insane!" She nearly shouted as she slammed her hand on the table. Her water came dangerously close to tipping, its ice cubes scurrying up the side of the glass. "I don't know how you felt about Eva, because I didn't want to. But now it's Blair we're talking about, and I'd like to know if you still have feelings for her!"

"What do you mean it's none of my business? I'm her best friend, and you and I are related, in case you've forgotten. So, yes, I do think it's my business. And with Nate out of town, I'm the only person you've got to talk to about it. Let's face it. You don't have any other friends." Serena let out a sigh as she realized Chuck had hung up on her; he could be so difficult sometimes. She didn't understand how Blair could read his emotions so easily, even by just a look or the tone of his voice. He was utterly undecipherable to her. Serena called the waiter back over. It was clear from his expression that he expected an apology for her distracting phone conversation, but she simply ordered her salad and handed him the menu. She didn't owe him anything. She was Serena van der Woodsen, it girl of New York City. She didn't owe anyone anything, but that didn't mean she wasn't going to try to help Blair and Chuck get out of the darkness they had retreated into and return them to light. It was just so hard to get those two to see the sunny side of life.

Gossip Girl: With B and C both MIA, it seems the Upper East Side is at a standstill. They always were the best at drama. But with the launch of Insomniac so close at hand, the only question is, who will be the first to come out and play? You know you love me.

Blair peered down at the new Gossip Girl blast. Insomniac. That was the new exclusive club that was opening next Friday night. She sighed as she realized she couldn't possibly go. It was incorrigible, considering Chuck would be in attendance. He was business acquaintances with the owner and had helped fund it, so there was no chance he would miss it. She had been avoiding him ever since her confession three nights ago. What seemed a good idea (or at least not a bad one) at the time had become regret, a mountain of regret. Sure, she'd had reservations about laying everything she was feeling on the table, but she'd thought that she'd at least get some relief afterwards. Maybe even some closure. But all Blair felt was anxiety. She had replayed everything so many times in her head that she wondered if she was even remembering reality anymore, or if now, all that she was thinking of were products of her overactive, and far too busy, imagination. She had become a real life insomniac, and ironically, she wouldn't even be able to go to the opening for the club that bared her new title. Obviously, she was going to have to find something else to do that Friday, like watch Tiffany's for the millionth time. Then again, she hadn't watched Charade in a while, and Funny Face always brightened her mood…

Gossip Girl: Spotted – S buying a sparkling stunner at Versace. There's no chance any male insomniacs will ever want to go to sleep with our favorite blond wearing that. You know you love me.

Serena carried the garment bag out of Versace, glad that its opaque blackness concealed the dress she was planning on wearing at Insomniac next Friday. She walked down the street, eyeing the gorgeous shops and drool-inducing window displays, and realized just how much she loved shopping in New York City. She only wished she had B by her side. Serena held her long, tanned arm out and was immediately bombarded by three yellow cabs pulling over to the side of the street. She slid into the first one and gave the cabbie Blair's address. She had waited three days, attempting to come up with a plan, but now she had wasted enough time. She would just have to wing it with Blair and hope that things didn't go disastrously wrong.

"Blair?" Serena called, looking around the penthouse.

"Upstairs!"

Serena knocked on Blair's door, just to be safe, and then opened it and walked in on a sight she had imagined but hoped she wouldn't see. Blair was lying in bed in the pink flannel pajamas only Serena and Dorota were allowed to see her in. Surrounded by stacks of fashion magazines, used tissues (at least, they were crumpled enough that they appeared to be used), and DVD cases, it seemed that Blair had not left her room at all in three days. Despite the fact that it was noon, Blair's blinds were shut, and she had remainders of various meals on her nightstand, including but not limited to: a blueberry muffin, a bowl left with only lettuce, an orange peel, and package upon package of macaroons. This was going to be a bigger challenge than Serena had anticipated.

My friends are so distressed
And standing on
The brink of emptiness
No words, I know of to express
This emptiness

I love all of you
Hurt by the cold
So hard and lonely too
When you don't know yourself

Until next time - xoxo