This is dedicated to JulesTaylor, amyseur, kiwijoeelle, Christian Grey fan, Christian618, and Goodlyfe

John's POV

I knew this was to happen soon. We could all precede it. Christian was opening his eyes… but there was something else about this… something way beneath this… Ana seemed out of it… She had never recovered from anything, and yet…

'Thanks for coming down John…' Grace got me out of my thoughts.

'Yeah… how is she?'

'Not good… We talked to Christian and Ana about our little talk.'

'…and?'

'Well… they don't like it…'

'They had to see it before all of this…' I replied back. 'Where are they? I'd like to talk to them.'

'They're waiting… Christian looks as if his head was cut off… he's changed…'

'I don't understand. They want her… They love her in some way or another… but as yet… they push her away…'

'Do you think it's because of Jason?'

'I think there's something else… something they never talked about… and I think I do have an idea…'

'…but it has to do with Jason…'

'Mum, Ana never blamed Christian for anything that happened. She fell for Christian head over heels since the first time she had fallen into his office… don't you think that's odd? Ana has the specification of his subs… he never let any other subs into his life… Why Ana? What's so different about her? We keep saying 'Christian this', and 'Christian that…' I reasoned. 'What if the problem is Ana and not Christian? Remember when I told you she almost fainted that time when Christian invited us?'

'Yeah…'

'Think about it Mum… Who went to help her?'

'Christian…'

'… and it was Christian that had the concerns on Sera, when he suspected something was wrong…'

'I still don't get it… if that is the case, then why was he still holding a grudge when she was raped.'

'He couldn't protect her… she went against his rules… which although she did wrong, I don't blame her… it would have driven me nuts… he couldn't control her pain…'

'…but Ana did stick up for her at times.'

'Mum, with who did Ana always ended up siding with?'

'Christian...'

'…and where was Sera in all of this? Despite her fears and feelings…'

'Into her own confines…'

'Exactly…' I replied. 'We had blamed Christian… but it's not totally his fault… Ana played a part in this… Jason's death wasn't easy on her… she needed to vent off… and the first person she found weaker than her was her daughter…'

'John, you sound as if Ana is bullying her own blood…'

'Not bullying… lashing out on her… Sera was always understandable… Remember how much we used to talk before? She used to try and give advices the best way she could despite her young age… Things between them all changed and took a turn for the worse when Jason died… but don't forget… Ana had been raised by three different fathers… That had to take a toll on her…'

'Then Hyde kidnapping her…'

'… and the hysterectomy when Sera was born…the loss of Jason… Christian's lash out with Elena…'

'It all adds up…'

'You're sounding as if Ana needs as much help as Sera needs…'

'Sera followed her father's footsteps… she's independent… she looks at things at his perspective… there is no black and white for her… there are only open choices… she doesn't take rush decisions, but she's as self-destructive as her own father…' I replied again. 'When you and dad adopted me, I got to know what a family meant like. Christian had some of his own problems. I knew it… I saw it… he took up drinking… bad company…'

'Recipe for destruction…'

'It left him weak… You both tried helping him the best way you could…'

'…but?'

'He improved at times… I remember mum, you would never leave his side. Those were the times I saw you and dad both broken… You were losing Christian slowly… Then Robinson came along… and the anger he had in him was almost gone…'

'You never told me… When did you find out about his obsession?'

'By mistake actually… I found one of his contracts... but he talked to me… it was then that he decided to be a dom…'

'… but what about Ana?'

'I don't know… I have to talk to her…' I replied again.

'They're outside her room. I told them to wait for you before they visit her.'

'Thanks mum…'

'John…'

'Yeah?'

'You know… I thank God every day that he gifted me with a son like you… I know you're not mine…'

'As far as I'm concerned… you are the only mother I know Grace!'

Christian's POV

'Ana… please open your eyes! You're denying everything!'

'Christian!'

'No Ana! Listen to me… I've let you have your way with her… I've let you wait and wait… I've tried turning things around… but nothing…' I replied again as John came forward while he opened a door.

'In…' He simply ordered, while both of us entered. 'Will you two fucking stop arguing for once?' He scolded. 'I feel like I'm dealing with a pair of 4 year olds! Your daughter is inside that room, and she's watching you!'

'John… stay out of this!' Ana replied back.

'No I won't Ana! We've let you have your way… We've waited for so long for you two to open your eyes… and look where that got her! What would have happened if mum and dad weren't there Christian?' He continued. '…and don't you think that she doesn't know anything! For your information she was there when Jason was shot… She told me… She was in the closet at that moment…'

'What?' I asked in disbelief.

'She knows Christian… She knows everything… She knows about your room…she knows about your obsession… She knows everything!'

'That's what Rhian meant when she told me…'

'Yes Ana… that's what she was trying to tell you before you dragged your daughter out…'

'How… how did we not notice?' I asked again.

'…because you were never there emotionally for her Christian! You both have been so isolated and confined to your own problems… and I don't blame you… life wasn't easy for both of you… but that doesn't mean you had to push her away!' He explained slowly. 'Christian, I've filed the papers for Sera's custody this morning…'

'What? No! You are not taking my daughter away from me John… I've already lost one son… I'm not losing another child.' I replied again almost getting physical with him, as I smashed my hand on the table. Ana's handbag fell, and a lot of things fell from it. She went down immediately to pick up everything, but a leaflet caught my eye. I slid down and picked it up. She tried snatching it from my hand, but I had already read what it was.

'What is this Ana?' I asked as I saw her face panic.

'That's… that's nothing Christian…' She replied while I handed the paper to John.

'Ana… what? How?' I tried… I didn't know what to say.

'I'm sorry Christian… I tried… I couldn't stop…'

'Ana… we talked about this… you know how dangerous those stuff are… you know all the side effects… heart attacks… bleeding… cancer…'

'I know Christian… I know… but I couldn't stop…'

'Ana! We freaked out when we found Sera's pills… and you're doing worse than her…'

'I know Christian… I just…' I said again as I turned around and walked away from her, while John took over.

'Ana… why didn't you say something?'

'What did you expect me to say John? I thought I had it under control… I thought so… then…'

'Then fucking what Ana?' I said again in desperation. 'I'm losing the most two people I love!'

'Christian… calm down… this won't help…'

'Yeah… like anything helped John!'

'Shut up Christian! Shut the fuck up! You're always shouting… You're always getting angry! Your past caught up to you and look what happened… it cost our sons life Christian! You know why your daughter's starves?... because we both were too busy with our fucking life…'

'Is it my fault Ana? As you see you are as self-destructive as she is!'

John's POV

'Is this how both of you react in front of her?' I asked.

'Yes John… this is how it always was… This is exactly how it always is…' Ana answered back. 'Yes Christian… I promised to stop… I did… but I couldn't… you know why? Because you pushed us away… have you forgotten when your daughter got raped? Have you forgotten how long you have taken to talk to her? How much you've hurt her? Have you stayed with her every night when she woke up screaming? NO Christian… you haven't!'

'…but I've tried turning things around Ana! I've tried…'

'…and as you see it didn't work Christian.'

'Ana… how long?' I asked… she remained quiet, but I had to know. 'Ana?' I asked again.

'Almost 5 years…' She admitted.

'5 Years?' Christian chocked. 'Why didn't you tell me something? Why didn't you open up to me?' He asked again as he moved forward and caught Ana's tears.

'…because I couldn't let you see me pathetic… When I overdosed the first time, you were abroad on work… I made Sera promise not to tell you… I had overdosed on Tylenol… I promised her to get better… and I did for some time… but then you didn't talk to me… you were cold… and I started taking the diet pills… until you found them…'

'You promised me you were going to stop Ana!'

'…and I did… I promise I did… but then… Sera's rape… it reminded me of when I was abused Christian… It was why my mother divorced the second time… my step father abused me… I knew what the pain meant… but unlike her… I talked about it… but she couldn't… and I couldn't handle seeing her in that pain… I started on Methadone… then few weeks ago… Sera found the bottle in my bag… and she made me promise to get better for you… She signed me up for the rehab facility… it was a plan between us…'

'…and you decided to burden our daughter with this, instead of coming to me?' I asked.

'I'm sorry Christian… I am very sorry!'

'Christian… Ana… I think both of you need some therapy… Ana you need to get better… you need an inpatient treatment…'

'I know John… I know…' She replied as she dried up her tears.

'Christian… What are you going to do?' I asked him.

'Sera needs a better environment…' He started. 'We've… we've broken her John… I'll hand you over her temporary custody for as long as you don't keep her away from us… at least till us both get better…' He said. I realized that finally he saw the big picture. 'You have to promise me that she'll be safe…'

'Christian you can visit her as much as you want… but she needs a family… she needs love…'

'…but I must emphasise this… You will be having TEMPORARY custody… ones we both get better… I want my daughter back… I want to fix my relationship with her…'

'Ones you both are cleared and I see that you are all better, yes… you will have her custody back… but not for now… she has too much to lose as it is…' I replied again. 'I will still have therapy with her… right now we are going to focus on getting some meat back on her bones, so she'll start responding to therapy.'

'…and then?'

'Then when she's ready… We'll have a family session…' I replied again as I turned towards Ana. 'Ana, you need individual therapy and group therapy with people having the same problem as you do. I need to admit you immediately into rehab for now…'

'We know…' Ana replied. 'I want to get better… if not for me… at least for her…'

'What about you Christian?'

'I want to be a better father…' He replied. 'I'll do anything to save her…'

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