Christian's POV

The day that I became a man… the day I became someone inside… the day that I wasn't only a Mr. Grey… but now I was going to have a wife… a beautiful loving wife, that changed me… made me a better man.

We were on the altar about to make our vows to each other. I kept staring at her face. I kept looking deeply into her eyes. I know what I felt towards Ana. I finally learned what true love meant. I started saying my vows…

'I solemnly vow that I will safeguard and hold dear and deep in my heart our union and you.
I promise to love you faithfully, forsaking all others, through the good times and the bad, in sickness or in health, regardless of where life takes us.
I will protect you, trust you, and respect you.
I will share your joys and sorrows and comfort you in times of need.
I promise to cherish you and uphold your hopes and dreams and keep you safe at my side.
All that is mine is now yours.
I give you my hand, my heart, and my love from this moment on for as long as be both shall live.'

She smiled, and I could see clear tears of joy coming from her eyes. She held my hand tighter, and she started telling me her vows.

'I give you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, to stand by your side in good times and in bad, to share your joy as well as your sorrow.
I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals and dreams, to honour and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, to share my hopes and dreams with you, and bring you solace in times of need.
And to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.'

We sealed our love with a kiss after exchanging rings. I was finally hers, and she was finally mine. Nobody could take us away from each other. We became one…

Soon the scene changed. I saw us dancing in our wedding. I saw us holding each other tightly together. I picked her up bridal style and exited the hall to our wedding car that took us straight to the yacht, were we spent our honeymoon. Everything seemed to go on fast-forward. Soon the scene changed again, and we were in our bedroom at Escala.

'Ana? Are you ok? You've been in there for almost half an hour!' I asked her from behind the bathroom door.

'Yes Christian. Don't come in… I have a surprise for you…' She replied. I could hear sheer happiness in her voice.

'Ok... But don't take long… now that you've got me all worked up on the surprise.' I replied sexily.

'You won't regret it baby… Trust me…' she advised. 'Go to our bed and close your eyes.' She ordered.

'Are you ordering me Mrs. Grey?'

'Why yes Mr. Grey!' She replied again. 'Are you complying?'

'Ok… ok… don't get all worked up Mrs. Grey!' I replied again in a hoarse voice, as I moved to the bed and did as I was told which wasn't to my normality… but for Ana, I'd do anything….

'Are you on the bed?' She asked again.

'Yes…'

'Your eyes closed?'

'Yes…' I said again. 'Please don't take any longer… I'm dying here!'

'Ok…' She replied as I heard the bathroom door open and heard her paces towards me. '… keep your eyes closed.' She whispered in my ear as she kissed me passionately, and I felt her placing a small box on my lap. 'Open your eyes now…' She smiled while I complied again. She was in front me in only her underwear. She caught me off guard. She would never do that unless I asked her to.

'What's this for?' I asked her almost confused.

'Open the box first…' She ordered again. I opened it as fast as I could, and in it, there was a baby's shirt. I turned the shirt towards me and read the words.

'NO. #1 DADDY!' I read out loud. At first I didn't get it, but then I realized there was a stick in the bottom of the box. I picked it up and realized that there was a positive sign on the stick. I looked towards Ana astonishingly, with a huge smile on my face. I stood up still holding both the shirt and stick, and moved towards Ana. I couldn't find the words. I couldn't explain the happiness, but finally I asked. 'Are… are we pregnant?' I asked her excitedly.

'Yes Christian! We are! I've 3 weeks pregnant already!' She said with a grin on her face.

'We're pregnant?' I asked again almost not believing the circumstance.

'Yes Christian! We are!' She replied again. I moved closer towards her, and lifted her off the ground. I was the happiest man ever. We were going to finally have a child… finally have a kid… the house wouldn't be empty anymore. There was going to be someone to return our love… an Innocent love towards us.

'Easy Christian!' She said again as I put her down on her feet and kissed her passionately. I placed my hand on her abdomen. I couldn't believe that inside my wife there was another life starting. Our love had finally produced an offspring. 'When are we due?'

'November… but I don't want us to tell anyone for now. I want to make sure that I don't miscarriage again before we tell anyone… we'll minimize disappointments…' She explained.

'I agree…' I replied again.

'Enjoy this view while you can Mr. Grey, because in few months, I won't be able to tie my shoes!' She said again as I lifted her off bridal style.

'Ohh, and I'll gladly do it for you Mrs. Grey!'

The scene soon changed again, to when Sera was born. I was the first one to hold her. Babies never made me tear up and all mushy inside, but she made me. I looked down towards her, and her tiny hands were reaching to my face. I placed my index finger into her little hands, and she grabbed it immediately. Her grip was soft. Her skin was flawless. I hugged her close to me… She was so small in my arms. I made a promise to myself that I will protect her from everything. Protect her from all the pain… from anything that would harm her…from anything that would hurt her…

I felt like I was viewing my life in fast-forward. Soon Sera grew up, and Jason's adoption was finalized. We managed to get him at only few months of age. We all welcomed him and loved him. Both Ana and I loved kids.

Jason's death replayed in my mind. I saw him there lying lifeless… blood pouring from his head, forming a pool beneath him… taking away his life. Leila had also killed herself that night. She knew I wasn't leaving my family, and before the police got to her, she had already shot herself. Ana was crying her guts out, calling Jason out… we both were, hoping that he would wake up… but it was to no avail.

Sera's POV

I kept staring at the ceiling counting numbers…making all kinds of hypothesis and theories that lead to nowhere. The night was the longest time I could endure. There was nothing I could do. I had started reading the book that brought me, but after some time, I was feeling nauseated. I got up to a seating position, and from the bed-side cabinet, I brought a pencil and a plane paper. I made sure not to make any sounds. The least I wanted was waking up dad. He looked exhausted. He came back with red puffy eyes. I knew something had happened. From the window I could see him discuss things with Flynn. They were too deep into their conversation. I tried picking up what they were saying from lip reading… but I wasn't good as dad was in that aspect… so I decided to let it go… They would tell me if they wanted to… it was no use battling on it. I got back in bed and placed the book on my lap. I started drawing the first thing that came to mind. I drew a window with rain pouring outside, and a young girl sitting behind the window staring at the falling rain… A dog at her side, joining her, and a blazing fire place giving out the warmth in the room… I always loved the rain. It reminded me of myself of how I used to do that with Bert.

I looked towards dad. I realized that his sleep wasn't easy. There was something haunting his brain, filling it with brim and fright. Dad was never the best talker. I knew it… everybody knew it… I moved forward and covered him with his falling quilt.

Christian's POV

'Sera…' I called from downstairs. 'Sera!' I tried again.

'Maybe she's sleeping Christian…' Ana suggested.

'She hasn't had any dinner Ana!' I replied again, as I started making my way to her room. I knocked the door gently, hoping to receive an answer, but I didn't. I walked in her room, but there was no one to be seen. I realized that her bathroom door was closed. I knocked gently, and called her again, but it was to no luck, because she didn't reply. I heard the water flowing, and called her again. I could feel it in my bones. Something wasn't right.

'Sera… I'm coming in!' I tried again, but there was no response. This time I decided to take matters into my own hands. I opened the door, hoping to at least find my daughter sleeping in the tub… but instead… she was there… with the running water in the tub. Her arm was hanging from the edge of the tub, and a deep cut was visible. Blood was pouring from her arm. I made one swift move towards her, and closed the tap off. 'Sera! Sera!' I called again as I pulled her from the freezing cold water. 'ANA!' I shouted, while she came running into her room.

'What is all this shou…' She started as she entered the bathroom finding me with my daughter lying lifeless in my arms.

I shot up from my sleep. I couldn't get myself to deal with my own night terrors.

'Dad…' I heard from my side. 'Are you alright?' She asked me.

I turned to face her. I realized she was already awake, and from her eyes, I could see that she hadn't got any sleep. I looked over to my watch at it read 2am.

'Dad?' She asked again.

'Yeah… I'm ok honey…' I replied as I stood up and went to the bathroom and washed my face. 'Why are you still up?' I asked her as I exited the bathroom with the towel in my hand, and switched on the lights.

'I… couldn't sleep daddy…' She admitted.

'Honey… you should try and get some… You need it…' I said again as I moved forward to her. I realized she was still holding the book and I had brought her. 'To sleep you need to stop reading…' I advised as I took the book from her hand. I realized there was a paper inside the book. I pulled it out and stared at it. 'Did you do this?' I asked her.

'Mhmm…' She replied. 'You can throw it away… It's not good…' She continued as she looked away.

'I love it…' I smiled.

'You do?' She asked astonished.

'It's simple… full of shading… perception… It's Renaissance and Baroque.' I smiled. 'A semi-circle with a tangent line here at the window. The light from the fire place emerging from one point…' I continued.

'Dad… you're reading way into it…'

'No sweet heart… you are not giving yourself enough credit…' I replied again. 'Can I keep it?' I asked her.

'Sure… if you want…' She said again avoiding my eyes. I placed it on the table and went forward to her, sitting on the edge of the bed.

'Penny for your thoughts…'

'What were you dreaming about dad?' She asked almost ashamed of herself. She truly had no self-esteem… no confidence what so ever… and what hurt the most was that she was almost afraid of me.

'I… don't quite remember peanut… It was all jumbled…' I replied again. '… I found your letter…' I finally said. John had told me that I had to confront her about it. We needed to talk about it, and it seemed to be the right time.

'What… What letter?' She chocked. Her heart monitor started to increase. I realized the question caused her stress.

'Hey… relax… I'm not angry with you… I … I just want to know why…'

'You read it?' She asked me.

'Yes… I did…' I replied again. '…but what I can't understand is how a young beautiful girl like you would resort to…'

'Cutting dad?' She confronted back. 'Say it…' She stated again as she looked down to her hands. 'I know you're ashamed of me… Look were you are… you're in the hospital with me… when I know you'd rather be doing something else on your nights. I've always been in the way dad… I … I never belong anywhere…'

'What do you mean?' I asked her gently as I cupped her face.

'Leave it… I don't want to talk about it…' She admitted.

'Sera… I know I haven't been easy on you… I realised my mistakes now… and I know there is probably so much anger built in you…'

'…anger?' She asked. 'Dad… anger doesn't even start with what I'm feeling! I want to tell you so many things… I want to just blurt out everything… pour my heart out to you… but I can't… I want to stop this… I want to stop this feeling… but I can't…' She cried. I pulled her to my chest and held her to me. She clung onto my neck not wanting to let go. I felt like I was her only life line.

'Shh baby girl…' I tried. Her body shook into my arms.

'I've tried dad… I promise you I really have tried… but I couldn't… I curse myself for that night… I should have never gone with Natalie… and look were that got me. I was fucking …..' She started. 'I tried getting him off me. I tried pushing him away… but he was too strong… He kept… he pushed… he slapped… he threw me as a rug…' She said again. I felt pain in my chest. My heart squeezed at what she was telling me. 'I promise I tried everything I could to make him stop… I even offered him money…' She continued.

'What happened then?' I asked her again. She had to get this off her chest.

'I remember… begging him to stop… he kept saying on… on how tight I was… and that I was better because I was a virgin… the more I pushed him away… the more he kept holding me tighter. He tried choking me… and I was hoping he won't stop, so I'll die at that moment. He just wanted to get me a bit tired. ' she said again. I felt anger in me, and feared for what was to come next. I knew a rape wasn't easy on anyone… I knew how it worked… I've seen it…

'Shhhh… you don't have to continue if you don't want to…' I told her again. I knew this was hard for her… but at least she was starting to talk.

'I dream about him every single night. I see him pushing himself… pleasuring himself… he kept thrusting hard. I resisted him dad… I did… I was hoping for him to end it fast… but no… he had other plans… he kept stopping and starting all over… sometimes I thought… why is it so bad? Why is this affecting me this much? I can't understand anything… I'm so confused…' She cried. 'I begged him to stop…I was hoping it would all end fast daddy… but it didn't… he kept calling me a whore… a bitch… I feel used… I am used… I hate myself…'

'Don't say that honey… it wasn't your fault…' I tried.

'It is dad… if I hadn't led him on… maybe it wouldn't have happened… maybe if I didn't…' She tried again. She started pushing me away. I tried holding her stronger. I knew that during these phases what one would need was comfort. She pushed me harder…

'Please… Let me go… let me go!' She begged me. I could see fear in her eyes. I let her go immediately. I realized she was having a panic attack. She started mumbling something… she kept begging and begging. I saw her scratching her fingers… pulling out skin… I feared for her. I pressed the emergency button, and soon a doctor and a nurse came in. I tried holding her down from doing any more damage to herself.

'What happened in here?' Mum asked as she entered the room.

'She… she started telling me about her rape… I was only holding her…' I replied. I feared that this was my fault.

'Dammit!' She replied, as she looked towards the monitor. She went forward and grabbed some medication.

'What are you giving her?' I asked her.

'It's a sedative Christian. It will help her.' She said again. 'Are you able to hold her down for me?' She asked again, while I kept looking at her. 'Christian!' She said again.

'Yeah…' I replied broken. 'Was she ever going to be ok?' I thought to myself while I held her down. My mother injected the valium, and soon her mumbling stopped, along with her scratching. She looked calm and peaceful.

'Christian…' My mother started again, as she rubbed my back. '…she told you about her rape?'

'Yeah…' I chocked.

'Christian… she's trusting you… she's opening up to you…'

'At what cost mum? Look at her!'

'Christian… I know this is hard… but you need to push her forward to talk to you…' She suggested again while I looked towards her.

'She looks peaceful…' I replied turning my gaze towards her.

'Let her rest… and you should also get some sleep son…' She smile while she kissed my forehead.

PLEASE REVIEW