A/N: Here's a quick update for you guys! I'm literally dropping this and running to dinner! But before I go, I wonder - do you guys think Nate should forgive Serena, or is she too far gone to deserve it? And also suggestions for upcoming plot lines will definitely be considered, along with trip destinations. I'd love some feedback! Now, without further ado, here we go...

Chapter 13: Stay on the Line

I just want to reach right through the phone
With my hands and hold you close to me
So we can just pretend
We'll stay here for the rest of our lives, yeah
And we'll grow old, just holding each other
So baby just hold

-"Stay on the Line" Jared Campbell

"Okay, tell me again, starting from the beginning, and this time let's try to make it coherent, yes?" Blair eyed Serena warily and handed over the second box of tissues, which she gratefully accepted. They were sitting on Serena's bed at Lilly's penthouse, because Serena had escaped the place she shared with Blair as soon as Nate made his exit. It seemed disaster always led Serena to the home she'd grown up in.

"Alright, well, it started out okay," she began listlessly, sniffling, but thankfully no longer shedding tears. "I asked him about his trip to London and he asked about Paris, and we were just talking like we used to, like everything was okay between us, and we could laugh and tell stories without all the drama, but…" She sniffled again, and Blair practically shoved the Kleenex up her nose.

"You know I despise that abhorrent sound," she muttered, before encouraging Serena to continue. "But then what happened?"

"He shouted that he couldn't do this anymore, so I asked what he meant by that, and he told me that he wasn't going to let me infect his life again, like I'm some kind of disease. And he said that he was still pissed about what happened with Dan last year, but that if what happened last night didn't happen, then maybe he could have forgiven me, but not now." Blair held Serena's hand as her blond friend's lip began to quiver. "He says I infect everything I touch, and the disease has been spreading in him for way too long, that the only way to heal is to cut me out completely. I love him, B, and knowing this is my fault makes it horrible. I love him, and all I've been to him is a malignant cancerous disease, corrupting him until he almost lost it." Serena finally broke off into a sob, and Blair wrapped her arms around her protectively.

"S, why did you look so angry in the first picture Gossip Girl sent?" she asked gingerly, her arms still encasing Serena.

"I – I got mad at first. I was in denial, I guess, and I yelled back, called him a coward for hiding in London and then for avoiding me. It was stupid, I know, but I just… I was angry and scared and just wasn't ready to be faced with the possibility of him leaving, so I picked a fight to try to get him to stay for a little longer."

"But you broke down when he started to get into the town car," Blair supplied, her tone the tender, gentle one she rarely used.

"Yes. I begged him not to go, but he did anyway." Serena's lugubrious voice was enough to make Blair agree to watch another one of her cliché movie choices (this time it was Sleepless in Seattle)and stomach the sight of her shoveling chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream down her throat.

"My God, Serena, what's happened to us? We've created the stereotypical tableau of every teenage romance movie ever," she observed, taking a swipe of the ice cream with her own silver spoon. Serena laughed at Blair's droll comment.

"Somebody should take a picture! It might be funny in later years," Serena replied, mouth full of frozen dessert. "I'll text my mom. She'd respond to a text faster than she'd respond to me actually talking to her anyway." Serena pulled out her phone, not noticing Blair's sudden apprehensive silence, oblivious to the thoughts that were racing through her head. Blair still couldn't quite believe that Lilly would go behind Chuck's back and attempt to sell the company, but until she got an explanation from Lilly herself, she would have to continue to act with refined, collected civility, and ignore her desire to ask what the hell was going on. She had promised to be Chuck's general, and one of the first rules of war was to let your opponent make the first move. That way, you could size them up and figure out how much it was going to take to squash them.

"Did you need something, girls?" Lilly poked her blond head in Serena's doorway, holding her phone out.

"Yes, take a picture of us!" Serena directed her mother, handing over her own cell phone for the purpose.

"Are you sure you want to have this captured for all to see?" Lilly's eyes narrowed as she appraised the scene – the gallons of ice cream, the hideous pajamas, the DVD cases, and the messy hair and makeup-free faces of the two young women.

"Positive." Lilly then obliged, and Serena shot into snorts of laughter upon seeing it. "Oh, that's going to be a classic. I can already tell."

"Well, have a nice night, and let me know if you need anything else. Preferably through human communication," she added, raising her eyebrows and shaking her phone in Serena's direction. "Good night, Serena. Good night, Blair."

"Good night, Lilly," Blair said distantly. "Nice to see you again." Lilly looked a bit perplexed by Blair's uncomfortable, anomalous statements but refrained from commenting. Serena, however, did not.

"Nice to see you again?" she repeated when Lilly had left the room. "What was that? You were acting weird the whole time my mom was in here."

"It's nothing," Blair said, dodging the question. "I'm exhausted, and cold politeness is practically my autopilot."

"Okay, then," she accepted, pulling out another DVD. "How about we move on to Pretty Woman?"

"Seriously? You want to watch a movie about a prostitute?"

"It's a good movie, Blair! It's like a modern day Cinderella story!" Serena defended, upset that Blair was criticizing one of her favorite flicks.

"I'm sorry that I don't find black leather thigh highs appropriate or acceptable substitutes for glass slippers," Blair tossed back haughtily.

"Well, fine, what do you want to watch?"

"How about something classic, like – "

"Audrey?" asked Serena, rolling her eyes.

"No," Blair snapped, "though you say it like watching one of the greatest actresses of all time is a chore. I was going to say, like an Alfred Hitchcock. How about Rebecca? I know you didn't read the book, but I'm sure you'll be able to follow along."

"It's not in black and white is it?" Serena groaned, flipping onto her stomach.

"Yes, it is, and it's for your own cultural edification!"

"So what you're saying is, it's for my own good?"

"Exactly," Blair seconded, nodding. "I'm going to shape you up into a woman so cultured, knowledgeable, and classy that Nate will wonder how he ever let his idiocy get ahead of his emotions."

"Really?" Serena squeaked, her tears returning to her wide blue eyes. "You mean it?"

"Yes, and the first rule is no more crying."

…

"So how did it go with Nate?" Blair whispered, gently shutting the door to Serena's bedroom, where a passed out Serena was softly snoring.

"It was – wait, why are you whispering?"

"We're at the van der Woodsen, well I guess Humphrey penthouse now, and I don't want to wake anyone up."

"And did you… happen to see Lilly?"

"Briefly," Blair admitted, her voice still low. "We barely exchanged ten words."

"So you didn't ask her about anything?" Chuck continued, pressing her for details.

"Of course not," she berated him, raising her voice as she entered the living area. "I may be the commander of this army, but I still need to consult my subordinates about our tactics and plans." Chuck laughed softly in response.

"I'm flattered you think so highly of me."

"I didn't say that," she countered. "Remember, we're in battle mode now, and you have to take people's words for what they are. No added meaning, no extra interpretation. I said I want your opinion, not that I'm asking because I like you."

"Yes, General Waldorf."

"I like that title. General Waldorf."

"As do I, General Waldorf."

"We need to come up with a name for you, don't we?" she asked coquettishly. "Lieutenant is second in command, but Lieutenant Bass sounds funny."

"Hm, well what's the lowest? I think I'd enjoy having you whip me into shape, help me climb the ranks…" Blair chuckled.

"Oh, I know you would. And it's private."

"Well then, General Waldorf, Private Bass is at your service. What's my first assignment?"

"Your first assignment is to tell me what is going on with our dear friend, Nathaniel Archibald. I want a full report, Private."

"Of course, General. The subject continuously ranted about his disastrous love life, complained that love is supposed to be simple, and detailed the events of the day before succumbing to the pulls of alcohol and expensive marijuana."

"What did he say happened with Serena?"

"He said that they were talking about their summers and then he started worrying that he was about to let her walk all over him once again, so he started yelling the most hurtful things he could think of, told her he was cutting her out of his life, and stormed off."

"Sounds nearly identical to what Serena told me," Blair said with a sigh. "Do you think they have any idea that we constantly talk about and comment on their personal lives without them present?"

"Not a chance, General Waldorf. They're not the sharpest knives in the drawer."

"But they are sharp enough to stab each other in the back if we can't devise a way to stop it from happening," Blair groused grouchily.

"Touché." When silence remained on the line, Chuck continued, realizing that Blair was seriously overcome with concern for her friends. "It seems we have a second mission in the works."

"You really think we can fix this?" she asked him weakly.

"I think my General better not doubt herself," he answered. "She can do anything she puts her mind to."

"Why thank you, Private Bass. I might just move you up to Corporal, because despite your obvious sycophancy, I do happen to enjoy flattery."

"It's not sycophancy if it's the truth," he drawled.

"And there you go again! I think I better hang up before I start to believe it."

"Wait, Blair?" he interjected before she had the chance.

"Yeah?"

"Could you just – " Chuck hesitated. "Could you just stay on the line?"

"I don't know if that's a good idea," Blair replied, obviously vacillating between outright rejection and acceptance.

"Please," he added. It was enough to end her wavering.

"Okay, but no more talking. I'm tired." The dead quiet that hit made her check her phone to make sure that he was still connected. It wasn't until she heard the nearly imperceptible "Yes, General Waldorf," that she knew that he was there and was able to fall peacefully to sleep.

I can feel your breath on me
From miles away
I've never felt a greater relief
From anything
And knowing you are here with me
It's the greatest thing, it's the greatest thing

Until next time – xoxo