Goodbyes

Funerals were practically unheard of in the Underground. Cremations were banned by the Capital's restrictive ordinances. Burials were almost impossible, and even when the few grieving families managed to carve a grave out of the rocky earth, even fewer could afford the simple luxury of a marker. Children who succumbed to starvation and winter illness, men murdered for food or money, women like his own mother who died birthing their children, all of them disappeared, swallowed by the earth without ever truly leaving it.

Or seeing the light.

So when the Scouting Legion and their families gathered to burn their dead, Levi felt genuinely surprised they even cared. That anyone held value in a loved one's corpse. What did it matter? What good was an empty shell? Isabel and Farlan weren't among the burning bodies in the massive fire before him. They were still out there, rotting away in the grass plains, and that suited him just fine.

He was fine with that.

A sudden gust a wind swept over the assembly of soldiers, extinguishing dozens of candles in its wake, including the one in his hands. A thin, forlorn trail of smoke stemmed from the wick, trailing toward the night sky and disappearing into darkness. He watched it go, apathetic and uncaring, then turned as he heard the heartbroken sobs of a woman.

She was standing several paces away, a civilian in a long, grey dress with a navy blue shawl. In her hands was a folded, bloodstained cloak with their unmistakable sigil. Beside her, a soldier wrapped an arm around her trembling shoulders. For a brief moment, he wondered who it was she lost, then turned away. It didn't matter to him. She was just a stranger. Why should he care if her child or husband or sister had died a brutal death outside their sanctuary.

Prison.

The word hit him suddenly, but he dismissed it with a scowl. He closed his eyes. It didn't matter. It didn't matter Isabel and Farlan's bodies would never be retrieved. That they would continue to rot deep in in the titan lands. He still had his memories of them. It was fine. He was okay with that. His jaw clenched as he tuned out the mournful cries and sobs pressing in around him. I shouldn't have come. There was no place for him here. He had no bodies to burn.

And no one but him would miss them even if he had.

Levi closed his eyes. He could've just held a memorial for them by himself somewhere. He should've done that, not participate in this miserable crowd. He had no place here.

He jumped suddenly as a hand suddenly clasped his, and he stared in alarm. It was that woman he'd met a few days ago, the subdued Scout who wore her auburn hair in a long braid. He frowned as he tried remembering her name….Renata….Radka….no, Petra. Petra Ral.

The young woman's cheeks were dry, yet he saw indisputable traces of pain behind her amber eyes. Wordlessly, she held her candle over his, touching the wicks together until both flared up, flickering in the dark. Then she slipped her hand into the crook of his arm and leaned her head against his shoulder. "Molly Antonis. Adam Taylor. Roger Kelly. And Claus Dunn."

Members of her regiment? She was under Captain Addario's command if he remembered right. They'd suffered minor casualties in comparison to his completed annihilated squad. Levi swallowed, unsure of how to respond. Was he supposed to answer her? If so, how? Petra glanced up at him. "And yours? I know Flagon and Sairam are gone now, but I never learned the names of the other two."

For a ghost of an instant, he wanted to snap at her. To lash out and shove her away, snarling it was none of her damn business who they were. They were nothing to her, just as her dead friends meant nothing to him. He didn't care.

He didn't care.

"Isabel. Isabel Magnolia. And Farlan Church."

Petra lowered her eyes, and within moments he heard her sniffling. His right hand gripped a wavering candle, his left hung uselessly at his side. What was he supposed to do? Pat her head like used to do for Isabel? Say something to cheer her up? Not likely, he hardly knew her. Why was she even here? What reason did she have to seek him of all people out? To offer her condolences? If anything, that poor woman holding the Survey cloak needed comfort. Not him. Nor did he really want her pity. She'd lost people, too, after all-he stopped.

He understood now.

It wasn't that she was sympathetic or wanting any form of solace. Those names weren't just members in her squad. He'd lost two. She'd lost four.

And she was just as alone as he was.

-0-0-0-

Author's Notes: I posted this in honor of No Regrets finally airing. If you having seen it yet, go check it out.

I didn't write it into the content, but I imagined Hange singing Deidre's Lament by Heather Alexander. It's a sad and beautiful song, and I think it suits this series very well, so check it out if you're interested.

I don't particularly consider this a Levi x Petra moment here; I just think of it as two comrades taking a moment to mourn together. I wanted to try and fit Eld, Gunther, and Oruo in here two, but anyway I thought about writing it made it too busy and took away the simplicity I was aiming for.

Besides that, I hope you enjoyed it. Thank you for reading.

Attack on Titan/Shingeki no Kyojin is owned by Hajime Isayama.