Sorrow

"I thought I'd find you here."

Levi raised his head, his eyes dead and hollow and his mouth set in a grim line. There was no recognition in his face when he saw her, and no emotion when he turned back to the horse and continued brushing his long neck.

Petra rubbed her hand under Vittore's chin and leaned her head against the bridge of his long nose. "Hey, boy." The gelding snorted, though she imagined he sounded a little forlorn.

Of the five horses in Squad Levi, Vittore was the biggest, as well as the oldest and the least playful. He stood perfectly still while he was being groomed, never harassed his caretaker with nudges or avoided the brush by moving about the stall. She often found herself wondering how Oruo trained him to be so well behaved, or if that was just the old gelding's natural temperament. None of her horses, past and present, had ever stood this still for her. Eld and Gunther had the same problem with their mounts, once or twice forgetting to latch the doors behind them and ended up being led on a merry chase into the pasture. (Not that either of them admitted this, of course.) Even Levi's Cendre had possessed a level of mischief Vittore's stony demeanor couldn't muster. She liked to trap her rider against the enclosure of her stall, slap him with her tail, and lick his hand (and occasionally his face when he wasn't paying attention).

Petra sighed when she saw the black mare's empty stall, chewing her lower lip in thought as Levi continued to ignore her. Vittore seemed….rather apathetic to the attention he was receiving. He shook his mane when Levi accidentally brushed it with his fingers and swishing his tail occasionally, but otherwise, he was still and silent. Probably not thrilled by the idea of someone other than his rider tending to him. In any case, she was glad to see someone was taking care of him. Ever since….she cleared her throat and said finally. "Gunther and I going to Eld's house for dinner. You're welcome to come with us."

"I'm not hungry." Levi murmured, keeping his head down. "You go on without me."

Petra was silent, sighing forlornly into Vittore's face. They'd been lucky, remaining friends for so long and only just now losing one of their own. Gunther wasn't taking it well either; she'd caught him earlier today slashing the bark of an old elm with a paring blade, over and over, until the steel shattered to pieces. On the other hand, Eld was considerably less emotional about the whole thing, going about his usual routine and trying to maintain his usual chipper mood with a forced smile.

"You should come with us." She insisted. "I haven't seen you eat since we got back. It's not good for you."

"I'm not hungry." He stopped brushing Oruo's horse, gritting his teeth in what looked like anger.

A small, patient sigh escaped her. "Levi-"

"Really, I'm not."

"When was the last time you ate?"

He didn't answer. Petra swallowed. She had to give him credit. If they'd had this conversation a year ago, he would've either walked away from her (knowing full well doing so only pissed her off) or he would've gotten angry with her for meddling. Maybe she was being a little overbearing, she thought, but she hated the idea of leaving him, or any of their friends, alone when he was upset.

Forgoing all sense of social propriety, for the third time that day, she approached Vittore's stall. Some life kindled in her friend's eyes again, a defensive instinct he hadn't grown out of, and he took two steps back before she caught up and wrapped her arms around his neck. He went rigid under her grip, but she flattened the palm of her left hand against his shoulder and the palm of her right over the back of his head, showing him she didn't have a weapon nor was she intending on reaching for one. "I miss him, too." Slowly, she felt him relax, letting out a breath of air as a hand met the back of her head, sturdy fingers threading through her auburn hair. Petra smiled. Gunther had done the same when she'd talked to him that morning. Not Eld though. He'd squeezed her so hard he lifted her off her feet. "Don't worry, though. He might come back yet. It's only been two days."

Two days.

Two days could mean a lifetime to a Scout in the field, the malicious voice in her head reprimanded her, where Death chased them like cat with a wondrous selection of mice to choose from. She squeezed her eyes closed and bit her lip. Don't cry. She willed herself. Don't ever let anyone see you cry.

"You're such an optimist." He said.

Petra pulled away, keeping her hands on his shoulders as though she were going to shake him. "All right. We're all meeting up at the main gate in fifteen minutes. If you're not there, I'm sending Eld and Gunther to find you."

"Thanks for the warning."

"That was a threat." She patted her gray mare Termagant on her way to the door, but as her boots found the grass outside, she looked back. Levi had gone back to brushing Vittore. "Don't lose your faith, Levi." She said, hoping to convince herself as much as her comrade. "Oruo's been in the Corps longer than all four of us combined. If anyone's got a shot at making it back in one piece, it's him."

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Author's Notes: What happened to Oruo? Unless I suddenly change my mind, that story will be the next venture.

Shingeki no Kyojin/Attack on Titan is owned by Hajime Isayama.