The commander's gym was busier in the daytime than at night. I shuffled past a few officials and entered a small dojo reserved for Kylo Ren. I rolled out a meditation mat and settled onto it, removing my helmet as I sunk down. I was in the middle of a meditative rhythm when I felt an electrocution in my skull. I screamed and writhed about the floor, clutching my head. I pressed my back to the floor and cried out again, searching for air, a sound, anything. It felt as if my thoughts were being split in half.

I didn't hear the door open. I didn't realize Kylo Ren had entered the room until I turned over and creaked open an eye enough to see his black boots. He crouched down and held his hand near my forehead, and the pain became absolutely excruciating.

"You need to keep your mind blocked. I don't need to hear your every thought." I looked at his emotionless mask through teary eyes.

I huffed out a breath once, twice, three times. I couldn't breathe, I could barely see.

"Push back." He ordered. I tugged at the pressure, but it was no use. I couldn't think.

"do it." He commanded again. I mustered up all of my energy and pushed everything out of my head. He pulled his hand back but didn't move.

"Good. Anyone can look in your mind, you don't guard your thoughts at all." He grumbled as he stood. I stood up as he pulled his mask from his head. His cheeks were pink and his face looked intense. I watched his black curls fall from their place in his mask and tickle his chin and in response I found myself wondering if a curl would wrap all the way around my smallest finger. His brow furrowed slightly.

"Build up a wall. Without a wall, even Jedi mind tricks will work on you. You need to keep yourself protected."

He leaned down to my height and stretched out his hand, the leather barely brushing my cheekbone and making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I felt him starting to creep into my mind, I felt the flames of his mind burning away at my thoughts. My head was heating up and it felt as though my head were becoming a furnace. As the flames grew my cheeks turned red and I felt my blood rushing to my face. I scrunched my eyes shut as I realized he was cooking me from the inside out.

I thought of the snow outside the base, the snow that fascinated a lot of the younger recruits. Coming from Jakku, It had fascinated me.

I thought of the icy landscape of Hoth, a place I had only visited for basic training. Learn to deal with any weather, they had said.

I thought about how the cold had been so new to me, how my sweat had frozen and how I could never decide whether my stomach was cold from caloric burn or from the air.

I felt the heat leave my mind as if icy spears had poked it out of the hold it had on me. It soon disappeared completely and left me feeling as though soft snow was at my feet.

I broke out of my trance and realized Kylo Ren's hand had changed from grazing my cheek to gripping it. His breathing was heavy and his eyes watched my chest heave. His hand lingered for a moment and when his eyes met mine he released my cheek, leaving my skin with an odd nudity.

"That was mediocre. Your signature is still as obnoxious as ever. The resistance fighters will sense you from a planet away." He grunted. It had taken all of my energy to push him out, I couldn't imagine how I could improve on such a thing if I was this out of stamina.

"It'll get easier, but it needs practice" He remarked, and my face turned red. He'd heard my thought, or maybe he'd gone looking for it. What else had he heard?

"-And a mind that isn't cluttered with distractions" he added as he pulled his helmet onto his head. Oh my stars.