A/N: This is kind of a filler chapter but I felt it was still important to lead up to what I have planned for them in the future. Chapter 7 will most likely mark a little turning point and will allow me to FINALLY get to what I usually wanted to do with this fic ;)
I really want to thank all those sweet anonymous reviewers again, you words make me smile :) and of course everyone else who leaves a comment.
Oh, and Steph. Speedy Gonzales when it comes to betaing! Thank you!
"Um... Ma'am... excuse me, lady... you cannot... erm... you c-cannot s-sleep here..."
The thin lady was carefully nudging Brittany with her foot who was lying on the floor, her head in between a pile of books and a thermos jug that had left a small coffee stain on the khaki colored carpet.
"Ma'am.. did... d-d-id you... s-spend the night here?" she stuttered, shoving her thick glasses back on her nose with her index finger. "I-if you d-don't get up, I – I have to c-call my b-b-boss."
Brittany slowly opened her eyes, trying to remember where she was. She looked around and saw high bookshelves, saw herself curled up in between all this literature, saw the young librarian in her pleated skirt who was obviously not pleased with the fact that she had fallen asleep...
How late was it anyways?
"What time is it?" Brittany asked the stranger, rubbing her eyes.
"I-it's quarter to e-eight, ma'am."
"Oh... oh okay, hmm, it's getting late..." Brittany mumbled , yawning.
"Late ma'am? Eight A.M. and n-not P.M. ... y-you must have spent the night."
Brittany was immediately wide awake, sitting up as she looked at her phone in panic.
"Holy shit..." she whispered, quickly stuffing her things back into her bag. "I must have dozed off I ... it was hard to focus, I was tired, I'm really sorry..."
Brittany could sense the woman eyeing her closely, could see, from the corner of her eye, how she was looking at all the books on the floor.
One Renegade Cell: How Cancer Begins
Hope in the Face of Cancer: A Survival Guide for the Journey You Did Not Choose
Help me Live – 20 Things Every Cancer Patient Should Know
"I-I'm sorry, I- ... " the lady continued stuttering as her gaze was fixed on the book titles. "I'm not gonna tell my b-boss that you slept here. If y-you don't d-do it again, then everything is f-fine."
So that's what it must feel like when people knew you were sick. This immediate compassionate expression on their faces. They don't look at you in the same way, all you see is how much they pity you. Somehow it made sense to hide the truth... from strangers at least.
Brittany felt dirty from having slept on the floor, her back hurt and so did her eyes from all the reading. She had tried to get as much information on the topic as possible. Different kinds of cancer. Treatments. Coping methods. Everything.
She had started with a book for children to understand the basics and soon made her way forward to the more complicated and more formal literature. Some things had been hard to understand but Brittany had been eager to learn, eager to get at least a good impression on what was happening with Santana. If she wanted to be part of her life, she needed to know how to help, how to give advice, how to take care of her. She wanted to know everything.
"Thank you" Brittany finally said when she had her bag packed and was carrying the big pile of books on her arm. "I appreciate that."
"G... G-good luck with.. e-everything" the librarian told her, huge eyes staring at her through thick glasses.
Brittany stared back at the woman, her mind blank for a second before she nodded. Luck. Yes. They needed a lot of that.
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Brittany was almost half an hour late when she got to work, stumbling into the salon with her mascara still smeared across her face and her hair slightly tousled.
"You're late..." her boss hissed between clenched teeth. "Clients are waiting..."
"I'm really sorry" Brittany blurted out, out of breath from having to run to work. Of course the stupid bus had closed its doors right before she had gotten the chance to hop inside and the grumpy driver had just taken off.
"It's... it's a little chaotic at the moment..." she tried to explain, hanging her head in shame.
"Isn't it always chaotic in your world?" the elderly boss muttered, pouring some coffee into a cup before pushing it against Brittany's chest.
"Here. Drink that. And then use the restroom and clean yourself up a little. If you greet our clients like this they might run backwards out of the door again..."
Brittany did as she was told, taking a closer look at her reflection in the mirror of the tiny bathroom. There were dark circles under her eyes, her skin looked a little red, her hair was stringy. She really needed a shower.
Quickly splashing some cold water into her face, Brittany took a deep breath. She just needed to get used to all this, right? Her nerves would calm down eventually.
The situation with Santana was still confusing for her, it was still occupying her mind 24/7. It had controlled her thoughts when she was at her mother's place, it had controlled her at Amber's place, at the library, in her dreams, and it was controlling her now.
She hadn't paid attention to one word her annoying client Mrs Robertson had said to her. Something about her son she assumed, as always. Trying to finish the haircut as quickly as possible in order to get Mrs Robertson to shut up, Brittany half-heartedly shortened the woman's hair, the scissors almost cutting into her own flesh in the process.
Just as she was about to hold up the hand mirror for her client so she'd be able to take a look at the back of her head , Brittany had to realize that she had completely messed up. Part of the woman's hair was far too short and the only way to save this haircut was to shorten it entirely. Brittany's face lost its last bits of color.
"What is it, what are you staring at?" Mrs Robertson asked confused, her hand reaching out behind her head to examine what her hairdresser had done.
"Oh my god, what did you do?" she shrieked, "let me see..."
"I... I don't.. uh..." Brittany stuttered as her boss made her way over to the pair, immediately realizing that something was wrong.
"Out" she ordered, her face strict. "I'm serious, Brittany. Get out and come back when you're your old self again."
Brittany nodded, her hands shaking. She mumbled an apology before grabbing her bag and heading out, her colleague Anna right behind her.
"Brit, wait a minute!"
Brittany was storming out, catching her breath as she let herself sink down on a bench outside of the salon, biting the inside of her cheek to retain some control. What was this shit? What was she supposed to do? Was it always gonna be like this from now on? This was nothing you could get used to. This wasn't just a phase. Back to her old self? When was that supposed to happen? When she had gotten used to the fact that her best friend was going to die? Or maybe after her death? When she was gone and she'd get used to being without her forever? Who ever got fucking used to that? When would there ever be a point when she didn't feel like crying for god's sake?
Anna sat down next to her, giving her a concerned look.
"B, what's going on? You wanna talk about it?"
"I messed up Mrs Robertson's hair..." Brittany whispered, her foot tapping nervously on the asphalt.
"Yeah, I got that part. But I mean in general. What happened?"
"Santana happened..."
"Santana Lopez. Your ex." Anna stated and Brittany nodded.
"You didn't know, did you?"
Brittany gave her a confused look, her chin shivering a little.
"The other day, when I asked you about her... you didn't know she was sick."
Brittany shook her head.
"I'm so sorry" Anna told her, patting her thigh.
"I feel so embarassed" Brittany admitted, not knowing what to focus her gaze on. She felt like hiding somewhere. Forever hiding.
"I only knew because she bought her first wig here, it was before you worked with us. She didn't talk much about it, she just... well, it's awful, she's so young..."
"Too young" Brittany agreed, hating the thick lump in her throat that didn't really want to disappear lately.
"Are you gonna be all right?" Anna asked carefully and Brittany smiled sadly.
"She won't be all right. That's all that matters at the moment. And it sucks."
Anna nodded, giving the girl next to her a hug. Brittany appreciated these moments. She appreciated that Anna stopped asking because it was clear that there was nothing more to say. She appreciated being close to people, appreciated the chance to let herself go for a mere moment, to close her eyes and be embraced.
"Do you want me to call Amber for you?" Anna offered but Brittany shook her head, reaching for her own cell.
"I'm good. Thank you though."
Anna nodded.
"I'll talk to our boss, okay? Don't worry. Plus, let's be honest, you did Mrs Robertson a favor. Ladies her age should stop trying to look like teenagers. Shorter hair will be much better for her."
Brittany smiled as Anna gave her one last brief hug and waved, quickly moving back to the salon.
xxxxxxxxxx
Brittany reminded Amber of a sad and lost little puppy. She had left her own work as early as possible in order to pick Brittany up and take her home. She had heard how upset her girlfriend was and had not wanted to waste another minute before driving over to her.
If Amber were honest with herself, part of her felt as if she needed to prove to Brittany that she could rely on her. That she herself should be the first person Brittany would call in an emergency or whenever she needed help. That she was the one person who should first pop into her head whenever she needed to talk.
But now, with Santana being back in her, - or in their life, Amber couldn't help but feel scared. Scared to lose her girlfriend, scared of all the emotions that were slowly bubbling to the surface. She had never seen her like that before. Brittany was changing entirely and it terrified Amber.
"B, I'm sorry about what happened..." she began, holding the door of her car open for Brittany to get in. "I think you should take a few days off. To clear your head."
Brittany buckled up, looking out of the window.
"Yeah... yeah I thought about it. I might really need some time off..."
Amber smiled as she sat down next to her, starting the engine and slowly petting her girlfriend's leg.
"That's good. You should really try to recover, it was a lot to take... I don't know, we could... get away for a bit if you like? I'm sure I could arrange something at work, like, a little weekend trip? We've never done that. It would be our first little vacation..."
Brittany stared at Amber as if she were from another planet, her eyes moving rapidly in her head as her forehead was turning more wrinkly every second.
"You're kidding, right?"
Amber cleared her throat, focusing on the road.
"Why would I be kidding...?" she asked slowly, gripping the wheel a little tighter. She had a pretty good idea where this was going and she certainly didn't like it.
"Ams, I'm not gonna leave town when my friend is dying..." Brittany stated as if Amber were out of her mind, leaning back against the passenger seat.
Amber could feel the heat rush to her face, could feel her pulse race as the jealousy and insecurity kicked in.
"Brit, you are my girlfriend. All I asked you was if you wanted to get away with me for a weekend to clear your head because you obviously don't feel good. I was thinking of you and your health..."
Brittany shook her head, yet she remained quiet.
"And what's with the silent treatment now?" Amber queried. "Okay, if you wanna spend the time with Santana then just say so..."
"Don't even start an argument about this, Ams or you can stop the car right now. I am not gonna fight about this. She needs me and you said you'd be okay with it. Ams, you said you'd wanna help me, how is it helpful if you're trying to take me away from here and make me forget? It wouldn't work anyway..."
Yeah, it wasn't going to work, Amber was sure of that by now. Nobody had a chance against the ex, right? Wasn't this some unwritten law or something? That you could never compete with another person's first love?
Oh god, what was she even thinking. They were talking about a sick person, she should show more compassion, shouldn't she? Jealousy shouldn't be more important than that.
Plus, her girlfriend was obviously the most social and caring person Amber knew. She was doing the right thing. Who was she to try and hold her back?
"I'm sorry..." Amber offered slowly, glancing over to Brittany who still wasn't looking at her.
"What do you wanna do now? Want me to take you home?"
Brittany nodded, clearing her throat.
"Actually I wanna take a hot shower, get cleaned up and then head over to San's. There are still a few things I need to discuss with her and, yeah, she needs some real food, some proper groceries..."
Now it was Amber's turn to remain quiet.
"I don't know, I think we need to get used to each other again, but once Santana feels a little better and more open towards me, I'd say you should come with me sometime. For instance, you could come with me to her place, get to know her a little better..."
Amber had to raise an eyebrow, not sure what to say about all this.
"... I don't want you to think that I'm shutting you out of my life" Brittany continued. "... I want you to be a part of this. I need you to be..."
And Amber wanted to, she really did. Still, part of her wasn't sure how hard it was going to be, for all three of them. It kind of looked like a dead-end.
Brittany was biting her nails now, one of her few bad habits when she felt insecure and didn't know what to do with herself. Amber was scanning her sideways, taking in the sight of the girl she truly loved, wondering how long it was gonna take until Brittany would slip out of her hands.
She wasn't going to let this happen, was she?
Damn, Amber loved her. She loved Brittany S. Pierce and she knew the woman was worth fighting for.
xxxxxxxxx
"You just sit down on the couch and watch some Sweet Valley High!" Brittany ordered when Santana opened her door, looking at her surprised. "I'll cook!"
Brittany was carrying two huge bags of groceries that were so full that Santana was worried her ex might drop half of their content any second.
"Let me help you" Santana offered and Brittany bit her lip to keep herself from saying anything against it.
"Don't give me that look, I can carry some groceries" Santana said with a warning look and Brittany nodded. She needed Brittany in her life but she didn't need her to do everything for her from now on. She was still her own person, she still had her pride.
"What are you cooking?" Santana queried and her friend smiled, putting some fresh vegetables on the counter.
"You'll see. Just relax and let me do my thing."
"Okay, okay" Santana replied, raising her hands in defense. "Just tell me if you need any help."
"Will do" Brittany said smiling, opening the book she had brought with her. It was full of colorful post-its with little notes that bookmarked the best recipes.
"I always thought you found recipes confusing" Santana yelled from the sofa, grinning.
"They are, but I accept the challenge" Brittany replied with a wink, getting a pair of glasses out of her pocket.
"Since when do you need glasses for reading?" Santana asked confused, wrapping herself in a huge blanket.
"I don't, but they make me look intelligent, don't you think?"
"You're such a dork" Santana laughed, shaking her head. Brittany was still too adorable for words.
Brittany started slicing the vegetables and Santana found the cooking girl in her kitchen to be a lot more interesting than what was happening on the screen of her TV. It was a good feeling to see her there. To see her open all the drawers, knowing exactly where she kept her knives and bowls and pans. It was as if she belonged there. It used to be their kitchen after all, and Santana had barely changed a thing about it. It felt as if nothing had changed. Even though everything had changed.
Part of her expected Brittany to cut her finger because it was what had usually happened as soon the woman was working with sharp things. It was the reason why they kept their first aid kit right underneath the sink.
But no, not today. Brittany seemed focused and willing to get this right.
After a while the whole apartment was filled with a delicious smell and for the first time in a long time Santana found herself to be truly hungry. In the past months eating had mostly been an annoying neccessity for her, something she did in order not to starve and to keep her strength, but nothing she truly enjoyed. Now she could feel her mouth get watery, could feel some weird anticipation inside of her belly, looking forward to sitting down with Brittany at their dinner table and see her smile when they ate.
Santana sipped the last of her tea, pulling the sleeves of her sweater over her hands when she felt the cool breeze from the open window blow inside the living room. She loved being inside when it was freezing outside, loved the fact that it was already getting dark in the afternoon. She loved the warm feeling of soft cotton on her skin and hot tea in her belly. And Brittany here with her. It felt like home again. It felt right.
Brittany had started setting the table, forks on the right and knives on the left because Santana was a leftie, while humming a song to herself.
Santana gave her a warm smile, getting up from the sofa and walking over to the kitchen , not able to resist the smell for any longer.
"It looks great" she said in awe as she looked at the casserole that was still in the oven. "And it smells even better."
"A few more minutes" Brittany stated, smiling back at her. "I hope you're hungry."
"Yeah, actually I am" Santana said nodding as her gaze landed on the book that was still lying on the counter. She felt the knot around her throat tighten.
The Cancer-Fighting Kitchen: Nourishing, Big-Flavor-Recipes for Cancer Treatment and Recovery.
Brittany seemed to be aware of Santana's sudden change in mood and made her way over to her, laying a hand on her friend's shoulder.
"What is this...?" Santana asked slowly, letting her finger run along the cover of the book.
"I... I did some research" Brittany admitted. "Are you mad?"
The question was barely more than a whisper and Santana felt that all too familar little pain in her chest. Mad? No. No, she wasn't mad. She was mad at the fact that what had seemed so normal and familar was now overshadowed by the depressing reality again, but was she mad about her friend doing everything she could do keep her healthy? Of course not.
"I'm not mad..." she said softly, looking over her shoulder to give Brittany a small reassuring smile.
"It's just... why are you doing this?"
"I just wanna know a much as I can, Santana" Brittany explained honestly. "I wanna be prepared. I wanna be involved."
Her voice was serious now, Santana knew she was trying to make her point very clear.
"I told you you are important to me and I wasn't lying. I... I want you to take good care of yourself and... do the best you can,... I want you to eat healthfully... and... "
"And what?" Santana asked, her look hopeful.
"And I want you to let me come to your doctor with you tomorrow."
Santana swallowed.
"How did you know?"
Brittany stepped from one foot to the other.
"I kind of saw your calendar, that little notebook... it was lying in the kitchen, I'm sorry."
Santana sighed. "Don't apologize... it's okay... I... I guess I want you there with me."
They smiled at each other for a long moment until Brittany finally nodded and pointed at the oven.
"We should eat before the food burns. I put too much effort into this to screw it up on the finish line."
xxxxxxxxxxx
"I'm gonna burst!" Santana moaned, leaning back in her chair as she was rubbing her own belly above her shirt. "This was a food orgasm."
"I'm glad you liked it" Brittany giggled, eyeing her friend closely.
"Seriously, where did you learn how to cook so well?"
Brittany went quiet for a moment, the smile frozen on her lips. Most things she knew from Amber, a lot of tricks that had made cooking much easier for her.
"Uh... Amber taught me a bit. You remember she works at that catering service, right?"
"I remember..." Santana answered, her feautures giving away that she was not entirely happy with that information.
Santana looked tired, more tired than usual. She was a little pale.
"Are you okay?" Brittany asked carefully and Santana nodded.
"I'm okay, I just... I think I need some rest soon... if that's okay with you."
"Are you kidding? Of course it's okay. Energy is important.
Santana was making her way over to the sofa, lying down and supporting her head on the armrest, struggling to find a comfortable position.
Brittany had started carrying the used dishes to the kitchen sink, letting some hot water run over them.
Santana was still fighting with a little pillow, positioning it under her neck so she could still lurk at the TV.
"San?" Brittany suddenly asked, her voice shy.
"Mhmm?"
"Your... your wig, it's..."
Santana stared at her.
"It looks kinda uncomfortable... and you're at home after all. You should take it off... much better for snuggling on the couch."
Frowning, Santana dragged the blanket closer to her body.
"I don't want to" she simply stated, shrugging and willing to change the subject.
"I think you do want, you just don't want to open up to me as much..."
Santana sighed again, curling some strand of fake hair around her index finger.
"What do I have left, how much pride, if one of the main things that once made me desirable is gone too now? It's just awkward..."
Brtttany shook her head, moving closer to Santana so she was sitting right in front of her.
"There's no need to keep up any facade in front of me, San. I've seen you in all kinds of situations, remember? Hell, you've seen me in all kinds of situations and nothing has to feel awkward in front of me or make you insecure" Brittany assured Santana as she was kneeling in front of her, squeezing her hand.
"Remember how I felt when I got chicken pox? I was twenty, or twenty-one, and I was so whiny and embarassed because I thought chicken pox were only for children. I was convinced I had gotten chicken pox because the chicken who infected me thought I was still a child, you remember that?"
Santana smiled at the memory, her gaze dropping as the images of said day were flashing in front of her inner eye.
"I do, Brit... How could I forget?" she whispered.
"It's itching, San. It's itching so badly" Brittany whined, scratcing her arms as some huge tears ran down her face. "I look stupid. And I haven't even talked to any chicken lately. This is so unfair."
"Babe..." Santana said slowly, trying to hold back a smile. "Baby, they are just called chicken pox because... well, actually I have no idea why they are called like that, but it's not because you interacted with any chicken... or ate any chicken..."
"My mom said it's a disease for little children but I didn't get it when I was a kid so I have it now... San, do you think I'm too childish? Should I act more grown-up?"
"Brit, you're prefect the way you are. Never change. And stop scratching, it's not good..."
"But it itches, San! I want it to stop."
Santana had to roll her eyes, yet she had to smile.
"Remove your shirt" she ordered.
"I don't want to. Everything's full of spots. As if I had pimples all over my body, that's so ew."
"Brit!" Santana interfered, her voice stricter this time. "You do know who's sitting in front of you right now, don't you?"
Brittany sniffled and nodded.
"Good. Cause I'm your girlfriend and I love you. You're the prettiest girl I know and you could be covered in dirt and slime and all kinds of disgusting shit and you'd still be the most beautiful girl on this planet to me. And these are just stupid little chicken pox, so remove your shirt, now!"
Brittany's eyes widened at Santana's words and she slowly raised her arms so her girlfriend was able to pull the shirt over her head and unclasp her bra.
"Turn around, B" she said softly, getting the lotion out of the pharmacie's bag. She put some of it onto her palm and warmed it in her hands so it wouldn't be too cold on Brittany's skin.
"It's gonna be better soon, I promise you that."
Brittany nodded slowly. "Okay."
Santana let her hands run along the soft skin of Brittany's back, making sure to cover each little red spot with the white lotion, massaging her girlfriend a little in the process.
"Hm.. that feels nice" Brittany had to admit and Santana smiled.
"You see, it's not so bad. And once we're done here we'll watch a nice movie, okay? You can choose!"
"Anything?" Brittany exclaimed excitedly, her voice much more chipper than only seconds ago.
"Yes, Brit, anything."
"Awesome! 'Dude, Where is My Car'!"
Santana's hands froze and she had to close her eyes for a second.
"Brit, that movie is so silly, we've watched it at least three times and it gets worse every single time..."
Brittany pouted. "You said anything..."
"Yeah... yeah I guess I did..."
Brittany laughed.
"We should watch that movie again sometime..." she chuckled, though Santana knew Brittany was just trying to tease her. Still, somehow it didn't sound as bad anymore. She'd watch it a hundred times more if it meant they could be together and she would see and hear her laugh.
"Oh, oh, or remember that one time when I called you at work?" Brittany blurted out, barely able to control her laughter.
"Oh god, Brit..." Santana groaned, burying her face in her own hands.
"Hello, Santana Lopez speaking, please make it quick..."
"Oh I know, you like it quick sometimes..."
"Brit?"
"Hmmm, yes. Do you miss me? I was thinking about you..."
"Brit, this is a bad time, I'll call you later okay? I -"
"I'm naked right now..."
"Brittany!"
"I can't wait till you come home, cause I was at this little shop downtown today, and I bought this thing that you were too shy to get for us the other day. I can't wait to try it out with you, I'm already super w-"
"BRITTANY I AM IN A MEETING AND YOU'RE ON SPEAKER. GOOD BYE!"
The call disconnected and Santana's face had turned a dark shade of red as she stared at the five men sitting in front of her who were looking at her with widened eyes.
"I... um... excuse me, I'm so sorry, I told my assistant not to ... I mean, I usually don't accept personal calls at work, I thought it was something important, I - "
One of the men smirked, coughing. "It did sound rather important to me..."
"Why are you reminding me of this? That was a lot more embarassing for me than it was for you and now it's supposed to make me feel better?" Santana asked frowning.
She had wanted to kill her assistent that day. And she had wanted to kill Brittany.
"C'mon San, I can see that hidden smile on your face" Brittany grinned, sticking out her tongue. "We totally got over it... and... in fact..." she mumbled, "... I think we had the best sex ever when you came home again..."
Brittany bit her lower lip, batting her eyelashes in a manner that Santana had always loved. Oh sweet innocent Brittany who has never been that innocent after all.
"Yeah.. yeah, it was pretty good" Santana admitted, nodding and smiling to herself at the inevitable wave of memories.
This had been only a few weeks before Santana had gotten her test results. A few weeks before they had told her she had cancer. Before they had told her it had already spread and it looked bad for her. Before her world had fallen apart and she had slowly started pushing Brittany away. It was a happy memory. A careless one.
Brittany's hand was still lying on Santana's, but their smiles had faded. They were looking at each other in a way that didn't require words. There was trust between them. A deep kind of trust that they had started building up years ago. Sure there had been lies, sure there had been betrayal, but in the end this strong connection remained.
Santana held Brittany's hand, slowly moving both their arms upwards until their hands reached Santana's head. They not once broke eye-contact when Santana let her friend softly grab the wig,
Their faces were dangerously close to each other when Brittany slowly removed the fake hair, revealing Santana's tousled, dark brown and much shorter haircut.
Brittany could see her friend hesitate, could feel her insecurities bubbling back to the surface, but she would not let her feel bad now. There was absolutely nothing embarassing about the picture in front of her. Santana was a beautiful woman. Absolutely stunning.
Santana smiled shyly and Brittany smiled back, her hand slowly running through her friend's real hair. It felt different than the wig. It felt like Santana. It felt like the good old days.
"You're so pretty..." Brittany whispered and she could sense her own tears coming back, dangerously close to running down her cheeks. Her thumb was running along Santana's cheek now, enjoying the feel of her soft skin against her hand.
She brushed some hair behind Santana's ear, still looking her in the eyes.
"Still so beautiful..."
Santana blushed, closing her eyes for a moment to take in the feel of the other girl's soft strokes.
"I'm glad you're here" she whispered but before Brittany had the chance to answer, she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. The sudden sound made her heart skip a beat and she was drawn back to reality in an instant.
Amber. Of course.
"Ams? Yeah... yes, I'm still here. No. Well, if you like you can pick me up here, sure... yes. Okay. Then I see you soon..."
Brittany cleared her throat.
"I promised to come home to her tonight. I wasn't there last night, so I guess I have to, you know, I don't want her to be - "
"Brit!" Santana interrupted her. "Brit, its okay. It's totally fine. I want you to enjoy the rest of the night. I'm no fun anymore anyways, I'm really fucking tired. I'm just gonna sleep."
Brittany nodded.
"But I'll see you tomorrow, right? I can pick you up! 10 AM?"
"Sounds like a plan" Santana replied before pulling Brittany in for an unusually close hug. Sometimes Brittany wondered if Santana was scared it might be the last time they'd see each other.
Brittany put a small kiss on her friend's hair, rubbing her hands along Santana's back.
"Sleep well, okay?" she whispered and Santana nodded.
"You too, Brit. And thank you for... err... the food."
Brittany smiled. The food. Yeah.