I hadn't smiled in forever.

I felt at home.

Ella! Ella should be here too! She was like a sister to me, after all. She was safe to imagine.

I stopped rolling and propped myself up on my elbows.

I took a deep breath.

I imagined the grass rustling a few feet from my head.

A pair of old-fashioned clear, glass shoes weighed the grass down.

I peered into them.

They were empty.

I imagined a flesh-colored liquid filling the shoes. It swirled around and, near the tip of the shoes, It began to cool and harden into shapes resembling toes. The feet and shoes were very tiny.

I imagined myself leaning backward.

I watched as two feet formed slowly in the shoes. I imagined the process being sped up and the feet-liquid (that by then only skimmed the surface) spilling over and forming ankles shooting up from the shoes when they were instantly covered by a ring of flowing, deep blue fabric. The fabric sewed more of itself to itself. That is to say, I watched a dress and it's occupant form before my eyes. I watched the thread appear apparently out of thin air. I watched pale arms shoot out from pretty sleeves. I watched the ends of the arms split and fray into fingers and hands.

I watched a neck sprout from a pretty collar and the end grow into a dainty, frail jaw.

I watched the rest of Ella's head appear, and I watched her hair sprout from her scalp. I watched a look of confusion and wonder cross her features.

I'd modeled the dress off of the one Dmetri buys Anastasia in the movie, but in a deeper blue. It fit her perfectly; she looked great.

"Sasha?!" I imagined her asking incredeously. Amazing! My imagination was so vivid that I could hear Ella's voice as if she really was here.

I imagined myself beaming. It felt so good to see her again! I wanted to hug her.

"Yup! Did you miss me?" I asked, and laughed.

She still looked confused and unsure but she answered, quietly, "...yes."

She looked down at her dress and swirled the skirt.

She stuck her shoes out and glanced at me suspiciously.

She even examined her skin, as if she'd never seen it before.

"Where... where are we?" she asked tentatively.

I laughed again, and got to my feet.

"In my imaginary Frell!"

"Imaginary?"

"Yeah!"

She looked down again, "I suppose that that would make sense."

I laughed. I just couldn't stop! It felt so good, I felt giddy, "Really? How so?"

"Well... I've never seen this dress before. I'm so clean! Perhaps I am dreaming! I must be! But my shoes... if this is some odd dream, how did you know about them?"

I laughed. Again, "Who knows? I just felt like making glass slippers. And of course you're clean! Why wouldn't you be?"

She looked at me and scrunched her face.

"Sasha, I - this feels real. Really real. Are you sure you're imagining this?"

I felt my smile freeze.

"Of course." Of course. Absolutely. Of course. It was. It had to be. But - no. No! It didn't feel real! It couldn't!

Myra's kitchen, Myra's kitchen, myra's kitchen myra's kitchen myras kitchen myraskitchenmyraskitchenmyraskitchenmyraskitchenmyraskitchen...

I'd begun to chant it. But Frell wasn't melting away. Neither was Ella.

MYRASKITCHENMYRASKITCHENMYRASKITCHENMYRASKITCHENMYRASKITCHEN!!!!!!

I was screaming internally, and beginning to panic. Of course this was imaginary! It had to be! How could it not be? Mandy had said that there was no going back, that I'd be stuck in New York! So... so...

I realized that I wasn't just imagining my eyes being open. They really were.

My breathing sped up.

I could feel the horror begining to weigh me down and crush me.

No! NO! NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO!

I would ruin Nathaniel's life!

I wasn't strong enough to stay away from him, not if there was any way at all that I could find him! I'd cave! I'd ruin him!

I felt my eyes water. Frell became watery.

Why? Why couldn't I just enjoy my imagination! Why did it have to be TRUE?!?!

I didn't want to be here!

Well - yes, I wanted to be here, but I didn't want to because of what it would mean to Nathaniel, to Ella, to everyone I crossed paths with!

I couldn't be here!

I sniffed.

"Sasha?" Ella asked softly.

I blinked, and before any tears spilled over, I wiped my eyes with my sleeve.

"Sasha?" Ella asked again. It was more a murmer, actually.

I let my eyes refocus. I'd had enough of crying. I was not going to go back down that road. No matter what happened.

"Y-yeah," I whispered. My voice shook. I felt dizzy. My head spun, and I vaguey felt myself falling the other way. I felt so dizzy that it was as if I wasn't in my body anymore. I was barely aware of my head hitting the grass. Black spots began to impair my vision.

"Sasha!" Ella's voice was louder now, and stronger. I saw her face swim in front of my own.

But I couldn't answer. I was in a daze.

Author's Note: Okay, this is the VERY END of the depressed attitude. (I'm 88% positve.) Sorry, I know I've strayed from the original intended story line, but don't worry, I know where I'm going! Please review, and sorry about the time between updates! I promise that if you review I'll update faster! Thanks! ~Jade