On the nights Kahlan wasn't on tower duty, Rick stayed in her cell, in her bed. She didn't mind. He slowly seemed to be making his way back to his old self.
They were with Daryl repairing a breach in the fence when Rick experienced a waking nightmare. His eyes glazed over and he grasped the chain link, sticking a hand through it.
"Lori," he called out. The walkers clamored and huddled toward him.
"Shit!" Kahlan cursed when she realized what was happening and dropped the pliers, rushing toward Rick.
"Daryl!" she yelled, waving for him and motioning at Rick.
Daryl tossed the bailing wire aside and ran. He tackled Rick, pulling him away from the fence and forcing him to his knees, his arms locked behind him. Rick writhed in Daryl's grasp, trying to break free.
Kahlan skidded to halt in front of Rick and fell to her knees. She grabbed hold of his jaw with both hands and forced him to look at her.
"Rick, what do you see?" she commanded.
"Lori. She's out there. I need to get to her," he said, pleading.
"No," Kahlan said. Rick shook his head.
"She's out there!" he screeched. Kahlan gripped his face again and held him still. His eyes locked with hers.
"Lori is dead, Rick. She died giving birth to your daughter. Your son shot her so she wouldn't become a walker. She is buried in the nearby field. Lori is dead," Kahlan told him without breaking eye contact.
Tears streamed down Rick's face. He ceased struggling with Daryl. Kahlan glanced at Daryl and then back at Rick. Daryl let go of Rick's arms and slumped forward, his face in his hands. They silently sat with him as he cried.
That evening Kahlan was asleep by the time Rick came to her.
After dinner he spent time rocking Judith long after Beth and Carl turned in, lost in his memories of Lori.
His heart hurt that his daughter would never know her mother. Sure Carl would be there to tell her stories and the other women in the group would step in with womanly advice, but it wouldn't be the same.
He deeply regretted that he and Lori had been unable to work out their differences before she died. They weren't the same people they were when they wed but he knew he could have been more forgiving, more loving, more the man he needed to be.
With one last glance at Judith's sleeping face, Rick finally laid her in her postal basket. He smirked at Daryl's nickname for his little girl written on the side before walking toward Kahlan's cell.
He shed his boots and paused before climbing in bed. Kahlan was lying on her side on the edge, her back to him, having made a space for him like so many nights before.
Why this woman was willing to put up with his shit, he'd never know. She barely knew him yet she looked out for him.
Rick carefully crawled over her but instead of lying on his back, he settled on his side, mirroring her position. He studied her as if seeing her for the first time.
Her long auburn hair was braided like usual; she rarely wore it down. She had a wide forehead and her eyebrows framed her often-stormy hazel eyes. From her right cheekbone along her jaw was a faint but evident scar. He figured she was probably in her late 20s or early 30s.
"Something on your mind, lawman?" Kahlan softly asked with her eyes still closed, having roused when she felt him crawl in. She could sense he was staring at her.
"I can't thank you enough for everything you've done for me," Rick replied, reaching out and tracing the scar.
"Got it in a bar fight," she said finally opening her eyes. "Look, Rick, you don't owe me anything. Someone did for me what I'm doing for you. Just pay it forward someday."
He ran his thumb over her full lips and her breath caught. His eyes searched hers as he slipped his hand down her side and pulled her to him. She braced a hand on his chest.
Kahlan hadn't been with anyone in so long she couldn't remember the last time.
"Rick, I …" she was cut off when he tenderly covered her lips with his.