A/N: sorry for the week long silence, I had some time off work and went away for a few days so had no chance to update! But I'm back and I'll try and update a few times this week!

PS: there is a little bit of M rated-ness in this chapter, but it got pretty smutty so I put it in a separate story! If you want the heavy stuff, it's under "Seeing Stars", check it out and let me know what you think!

Beckett's apartment was empty when her and Castle got back, no sign of Charlie. Kate was worried slightly - nothing was out of place and there was no sign of a break in, but she thought Ryan and Esposito were dropping Charlie back here..

"Hey Beckett," Castle called from the kitchen. "There's a note.."

Beckett walked over to the kitchen to join him, breathing a sigh of relief when she saw the note Castle was pushing in front of her.

'Kate' it read, 'I really hope you read this before you panic but you didn't answer your phone so I left you a note. I'm fine, I'm going to Ethan's..sort of just wanted to see him after the hell of the day we've had! And before you go all protective on me, Ethan is coming to pick me up and I will be double checking it's him before I open the door, okay? I'll see you later xxx'

There was an addition underneath in different handwriting, presumably from Ethan.

'Charlie is fine, I'm not letting her out of my sight and I'll bring her back whenever she wants to come home, Ethan.'

"So uh, I guess this means we have the place to ourselves," Kate said, glancing up at Castle.

"So it seems," Castle replied. "But..you just quit your job, Kate, don't you wanna relax, take a bath and I'll order some dinner?"

"Castle, I quit my job like an hour ago, the last thing I want to do is talk about it, not tonight." She sidled closer to him, firmly pressing her body flush to his, wrapping her arms around his neck. "What I want to do, is take you to my bedroom and remember how amazing it feels when you do that thing with your tongue." Before he could comprehend what she was saying, her lips had attached to his neck and were sucking and biting lightly, driving him insane.

"Kate," he gasped, pulling her away from him. "Wait a sec." Taking a few deep breaths, he regained some semblance of control. "Can I tell you something first?"

Beckett rolled her eyes, damn writer boy always wanting to talk when she needed him to shut up. "Okay, Castle, spit it out," she sighed. "Don't even go there," she added when his eyebrows rose at her double entendre.

"You asked for it," he muttered. "Okay so um..wow this is harder than I thought given that I'm sure you already know and I think I might have said it once or twice but- what are you doing?"

"Taking your clothes off," Beckett hummed, continuing to unbutton his shirt.

"No, Beckett, stop!" He said, stilling her hands with his. "Just give me a minute, okay? What I'm trying to say is that I love you."

Beckett's expression softened, her hands falling from his shirt to cup his face. Leaning in, she kissed him softly before taking his hand and leading him to the bedroom.

"Aren't you going to say anything?" Castle asked, sounding a little bit hurt. He didn't need her to say it back, not yet, not if she wasn't ready but he needed her to know and a little recognition of his words would have been nice.

"Castle," she whispered, turning round to face him. "I.."

"Oh god," he said quickly. "No, I didn't mean you had to say that, oh god no! Just..something.."

Kate visibly relaxed and Castle felt like a jerk for making her think he needed her to say it. "I heard you, Castle," she smiled shyly. "And yeah, you've told me before but this is the first time since we've actually been together so I guess that makes it the first."

"Good," he said firmly, "just wanted to make sure you knew and..yeah." Then another thought hit him. "You're not doing..this just because you don't want to say it, right?" He asked, gesturing around to the bedroom.

"If you remember correctly, I was trying to get to this before you interrupted me," she giggled. Jesus he could actually make Kate Beckett giggle.. "So no, I'm not doing this because I don't want to say it but if you want to stop.."

"Don't you dare," he growled, pushing her back against her bedroom wall.

"I'm sorry, Castle, that I can't say it yet and trust me, it worries me every single day that it's not going to be enough for you, that you're going to want more and that you deserve more but-"

"Stop it," he whispered into her ear, teeth nibbling on her ear lobe. "You don't have to say it, not if you don't want to. And as for not being enough for me..babe, you're all I've ever wanted and now that I've got you I never intend to let you go."

There it was, that 'babe' again. Beckett grinned, she actually really liked it when he called her that. "So..if I can't tell you then maybe I can show you?" She said, fingers going back to their previous task of unbuttoning his shirt.

"Sounds good to me," Castle agreed, capturing her lips with his.

M RATED, SKIP IF YOU WISH

Pushing them both away from the wall, Beckett grabbed Castle's hand and led him over to the bed, finally removing his shirt and beginning to unbuckle his jeans.

"How come I'm nearly naked and you're fully dressed," Castle mumbled into her lips as he stepped out of his jeans.

"You're too slow," Beckett gasped. "Get a move on," she teased, palming him through his boxers.

"Keep that up and I'm going to be in no fit state to get you naked." Dragging her hand away before she went too far, Castle lifted her shirt over her head while she unbuttoned and removed her pants, leaving her stood in just her bra and panties.

Dragging them both to the bed, Castle pushed her onto her back and straddled her hips, his lips touching every inch that he could, her breathy pants and gasps spurring him on. "Hurry up, Castle," she groaned, inching her hand past the band of his boxers.

"Babe," he breathed out, desperately trying to control himself. "We can go slow.."

Beckett rolled her eyes, hand slipping further into his pants and wrapping around his hardening length. "Next time, Castle," she promised. His insistence that they could go slow, that they could make love and take the time to please each other was fucking adorable but right now, it wasn't what she wanted. "Right now, slow is the last thing I want."

Her words broke the dam, Castle growled into her ear, grabbing both if her wrists and pinning them above her head. "So that's what you want, is it?" Jesus Christ he loved her. All he wanted was to make this good for her, going slow..he loved it, with her, drawing out her pleasure and making her beg for more but getting to do the complete opposite was almost enough to make him lose it before they'd even started.

"Yes," Beckett gasped, arching her back when his mouth latched onto her nipple through her bra. "Castle.." She whined, "that's not quick enough!"

"You're so impatient," he laughed, fumbling at her back and removing her bra.

"Only with you," she grumbled and she knew it was true..there was something about them that made her desperate for him, she needed him and she needed him now.

He didn't wait for her to say anymore, instead pushing her onto her back and covering her body with his, guiding himself into her wetness. They gasped in unison, the sensation of him filling her so perfectly driving them both to the top.

"Come on," Beckett urged, wrapping her legs around his waist and urging him deeper. "Harder, Castle."

Castle groaned and picked up the pace, thrusting in and out..pulling out and slamming all the way back in had Beckett panting and begging, obviously able to come again, despite the two earth shattering orgasms he'd just given her.

Pounding her into the mattress harder than he thought possible, Castle knew he wouldn't be able to last much longer, his need for her too much. "I'm nearly there, Beckett," he groaned into her ear.

"Kate," she gasped, "call me Kate."

Castle grinned. The fact that she told him exactly what she wanted in bed was a massive turn on, well, the woman herself was a turn on but this was the icing on the cake. "Kate," he whispered, "I love you, Kate." The tightening around him began, his words exactly what she needed to fall apart again. He'd never get enough of that, the fact that his words could do that to her.. "Kate," he gasped again, "oh Kate I love you.."

Her legs tightened around his waist, nails digging into his back..and she reached her peak, muscles contracting around his length as she came again, words garbled as they flew out of her mouth, all he could work out was his name but that did it for him. With a final few thrusts, he spilled into her on a groan that sounded something like her name, his release washing over him in waves.

END OF M RATED

"You okay?" He asked a few moments later, pulling back to look at her.

"Okay?" She laughed. "Castle, I'm amazing." How he could doubt that she was okay was ridiculous. "You are amazing." She was going to have to stop feeding his ego if she ever wanted him to shut up about it.

"So many compliments, Beckett," he grinned, "you sure you're okay?"

"Shut up," she laughed, pushing him off of her. "Wait, are you okay?"

"Yes, Beckett, I'm fine. A bit hungry, but otherwise perfectly happy."

"Wanna go get some food? We never did order Chinese.."

"Yeah, I got distracted by this girl I know," he mused, "you'd like her, I think."

"Mm, what's she like?"

"Smart. Funny. Hot, oh yeah she's really hot.."

"Now who's paying lots of compliments," she smiled. "Come on, you're gonna have to feed me if you wanna go again."

She wasn't sure if it was the Chinese they were going to order or the promise of more sex, but he followed her out of bed, heading into the bathroom. Deciding against her clothes from earlier, Beckett dug out an oversized t-shirt from her drawer and slipped on a clean pair of panties.

"Is that my shirt?" Castle asked, coming back out of the bathroom.

"No, yours is- oh, wait..yeah, I think it is," she admitted, looking down at what she was wearing. "I uh..guess I never gave it back to you." She was wearing the red shirt he'd lent her over two years ago, when she'd been staying with him after her apartment was blown up.

"I forgot about that," he said, "but I looks better on you."

"Thanks, Castle," she laughed. He pulled on his jeans and decided against a shirt, following her out of her bedroom. He almost walked into her, not paying attention when she suddenly stopped.

"Why did you- oh." He looked over her shoulder and saw that Charlie was home - and judging by the look on both hers and Ethan's faces, they'd been home a while.

"Wondered when you two were going to come out," Charlie smirked.

"How long have you been home?" Kate asked suspiciously.

"Not that long but uh, we sort of figured what you were doing, didn't want to disturb you."

Kate groaned and buried her face into Castle's chest, but he seemed to be finding the whole thing funny. "Just think," he said, "if we'd been at mine it would have been my mother or my daughter.."

"That's true," Beckett perked up, "at least Charlie let us finish." Talking about sex with Charlie wasn't a problem but Kate was actively trying not to look at Ethan. Although she was sure he knew exactly what they'd been doing, she didn't need to confirm it with him, for his sake. She was also suddenly very away of the fact that she had no pants on and Castle was shirtless. "We were about to order Chinese if you want to join us," Kate said, "I guess we should probably put some clothes on first.."

"Don't mind me," Ethan supplied, "this is your home, I'm the guest here."

To be fair, Kate's shirt was longer than some of the dresses she wore..

"Chinese sounds great," Charlie added, still smiling like a fool. "You staying for dinner babe?" She asked Ethan.

"Yeah, if that's okay?"

"Fine with us," Kate said, knowing Castle wouldn't mind. "Charlie, help me make drinks while the guys figure out what to order."

When the girls were alone in the kitchen, Kate turned to Charlie. "Okay so how much did you really hear? Because I don't think I can face your boyfriend knowing he heard Castle and I.."

"Relax, Kate," Charlie laughed, "we've not been back long. When we figured what you were doing, we..kept ourselves busy. But uh..sounds like Castle knows what he's doing in there," she grinned.

"Oh don't get me started," Kate groaned. She still wasn't over that. "Trust me, Charlie, you have no idea the things that man can do."

"I want all the details later," Charlie said. "And honestly, don't worry about Ethan, he was probably better about it than I was - think it kinda got him a bit-"

"Okay we can stop right there," Kate said. Despite what they'd overheard, she didn't really need to hear about Ethan's fantasies.

"One day you'll let me tell you," Charlie said, "and I'm telling you it'll be worth it."

Beckett rolled her eyes and finished making everybody drinks, Charlie helping her carry them into the lounge. "You boys decided what to order yet?" She asked, curling up into her boyfriend.

"Just about," Ethan said, "Rick said you'd be happy with whatever and I know Charlie will too.."

"Fine by me," Kate said, "I'm not fussy."

"Just demanding," Castle murmured, just loud enough for her to hear. Kate blushed - which didn't go unnoticed by Charlie, who grinned knowingly.

After the food was ordered, the four of them sat back and relaxed - Kate realising she hadn't told Charlie what had happened after she'd left. She re-told the story of how she'd quit and she wasn't surprised when Charlie said it was the right thing to do.

"I've only met her like twice and I don't like her," Charlie said. "How did you manage so long working with her?"

"No choice," Beckett shrugged. "Not like we had a say in who replaced Montgomery."

Their food arrived, causing Castle and Ethan to argue over who was paying - to Kate's surprise, Castle actually backed down and compromised for once, agreeing to split it.

"They do know that either of us could have paid too, right," Charlie said in a stage-whisper to Kate.

"Never happening," Castle and Ethan said simultaneously.

The girls laughed and Kate handed out plates, the four of them sitting in the lounge to eat. "Thank you," Kate whispered to Castle. "I know you like to be all alpha-male and pay for things and I know I give you a hard time about not letting me pay but letting Ethan pay half was nice."

"He's like me," Castle shrugged, "maybe it's old fashioned but I was brought up to be a gentleman, I guess Ethan was too."

"Not too much of a gentleman I hope," she whispered back with a wink and Castle grinned.

"Yeah, I don't think I could have waited to marry you to get you into bed," he shot back and Kate felt her heart flutter inside her chest. Marriage? Before she met Castle, the idea would have repulsed her but now..now she could quite easily imagine marrying him and having little Castle babies.. Grinning to herself at the thought, she piled food onto her plate and joined back into the conversation with the others.

"So," Charlie said once they'd all finished eating. "What happens now? You didn't get Maddox, so I'm guessing he's still out there..do we hide until we know what's going on?"

Kate had to admit she hadn't really thought about it. "No..we just need to be careful. I'm hoping he's learnt his lesson now, going after my sister was not a good idea and I don't think he'll do it again. But you need to be on the lookout, just in case."

"And you're not going anywhere alone," Ethan added, to which Charlie rolled her eyes.

"Annoying when they go all macho, isn't it," Kate grinned. "But he's right, just because Maddox probably isn't going to go after you, doesn't mean he won't."

"Okay okay," Charlie relented, "I won't go out alone. Can I at least shower alone?" She asked sarcastically.

"No," Ethan replied with a grin and Castle laughed.

"Hey, they're just like us!" He said to Kate.

"Nah, we aren't as sickening as you two," Charlie said, poking her tongue out.

"Shut up, little sister," Kate retaliated, "or you don't get ice cream."

Castle and Ethan looked at each other in confusion. "But..you're twins?" Castle said.

"But I'm older. By two minutes and 47 seconds," Kate announced proudly.

"And she's lorded that over me since we were two years old," Charlie groaned. "Whenever I annoyed her, she'd pull the big sister act. Drives me insane!"

The other three laughed, Charlie even cracked a smile. "So," she said, "if we're not hiding, what is the next step?"

To Kate, the answer was simple. "We find the son of a bitch who kill our mom."

A/N: so yeah, the really M rated stuff is in a separate chapter, but the story is the same if you don't want to read it! Reviews more than welcome :)

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