Chapter Eleven: Forgiveness

The next morning Mr. Todd woke in her bedroom alone and was relieved to hear her already in the kitchen. Walking silently, he returned to his own shop and dressed for work. Sighing as he saw the down turned picture frame, he walked to his counter and righted it. He looked at the images of his wife and child and swallowed before looking away, ashamed that as he looked at them he thought, for just a moment, about the auburn haired woman and the small life she was carrying. Without a word he opened his shop and began to work.

Earlier that day Mrs. Lovett had woken in his bed, hung over from the argument and drained. She had gotten up, made his bed silently, and left as if she had never been in there. When she went downstairs she was annoyed to find him still asleep on her bed, fully clothed atop her covers. Ignoring him she dressed silently and went into the kitchen to make breakfast for Toby. She didn't care what or if Sweeney ate when he eventually woke up.

Faking a smile as Toby came in, she noticed the nervous way he sat at the table and prepared herself. She knew he probably heard the shouting. How much he heard she wasn't sure. She did know however that she was done being treated like a toy by him. He could stay if he wanted to but the moment he left, she was done. She wouldn't let him back. She wasn't even sure at this point that she would even tell the baby it had a father when it got that far.

Putting a plate in front of the boy she served him a fried egg and some bacon, placing a glass of warm milk beside it. "Eat, love," she smiled and stroked his hair softly before sitting opposite of him and putting the remains of her cooking onto her own plate. Toby hoped silently that the missing serving meant that Mr. Todd had left. Of course he would be upset for his mistress, being left and all, but really they were better off without him. He could take of her and the baby. Nothing was gonna harm either of them. Not while he was around.

Nellie ate silently and when Toby had finished she gathered the plates and washed them in the sink. He watched her silently before going out to set up the shop for her as he usually did. When he was gone, Nellie sighed and put her head in her hands. She hated herself for needing him. For wanting him. She had no doubt that in a few days or less he would manipulate her back into his arms and she would be falling for him again. For now though, for now she was upset and she was going to hold onto that for as long as she could. Hating him hurt less than loving him.

When she went to work she made an effort to redirect anyone she saw going up to his tonsorial parlor. He didn't need any business now that he had a plan and she certainly wasn't going to clean up after him tonight or any time soon. Upstairs he noticed the lull in business and when he glances out of his window to see Nellie grab the sleeve of a man about to climb up his stairs and lead him away to one of her tables, he could see why. He knew why she was doing it and all he could do was sigh and sit in his chair, sulking and nursing a headache.

When he heard the clock ring out in nineteen slow tones, marking seven in the afternoon, he closed his shop, knowing the pie shop would be closing as well. He waited for about fifteen minutes to be sure no one would be lingering down in the shop below before going downstairs quietly and into her parlor. Even though he didn't want to face her, he knew he would have to. First, to settle the argument, and second to settle his pockets before he had to leave.

"Pet?" he called out when he didn't see her, going into the kitchen to look for her. As he entered from the parlor she came in from her shop carrying empty dishes and dirty glasses. She ignored him as she walked to the sink and put them in, not even looking at him out of the corner of her eye.

"What do you want?"

"Come now, pet..." he spoke softly and came closer to her. "Don't be so cross with me..."

"Don't," Nellie turned to him and held up a hand, "even think about it." She turned and walked towards the parlor, hoping he would just go back to his shop and leave her alone.

"I was only going to offer to help you with the dishes." It was a lie but he rolled up his sleeves anyway and began to pump water into the sink after clogging the drain.

"Ah, well, do it yourself then, love." She faked a smile and walked into her parlor, starting to clean it up.

He raised his voice so that she could hear him and began to wash the dishes. "You know I had a record short amount of customers today. Any idea why, pet?"

"Ah, well. That's sad." She rolled her eyes, not willing to let him get to her and walked to her bedroom, closing the door behind her. Sighing, Sweeney finished the dishes and dried his hands before going after her. As he was going towards the bedroom she came out to get a book from the parlor, sighing as she saw him.

"Why do you insist on being angry with me, pet?" He spoke softly again and walked closer to her, attempting to put his hands on her waist. She stepped away from him and gave him a stern look.

"Because you deserve it."

"I won't be gone very long, Nellie..." He called her by her preferred name, hoping it would appeal to her further. "My little Nellie..."

Nellie bit her inner cheek, already feeling herself break a little as he called her his. God, she was so weak. "You used me. Again."

"What are you talking about, pet?" He kept his voice calm and gave her a bit of space as he leaned against the wall. His eyes stayed locked to her own.

"Oh, don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about, Sweeney." She sighed and crossed her arms over her chest. "You knew I would get mad so you fucked me just in case I wouldn't fuck with you anymore after you told me."

"Pet... that isn't true," he sighed looking at her. While true in part he really was just trying to delay the inevitable. "I wanted you, yes... You're an attractive woman. I just... forgot to tell you when you came in... swinging those lovely hips." He faked a smirk, hoping she would take the bait and they could end this.

"Ah, yeah. Right." Nellie rolled her eyes. Unbelievable. He was unbelievable. "Sure, Sweeney." She sighed and went back to her bedroom, leaving the door open behind her and sitting on the bed to let her hair down. Sweeney followed her and leaned against the door frame, watching her silently for a moment. When she was finished he walked to the bed and kneeled down in front of her so that for once she could look down at him.

"Pet... look at me..." He sighed and placed his hands on the sides of her knees softly. "Tell me you don't think I'll come back... Think about it... I could be back in two weeks if I can kill the Judge... maybe even less."

Nellie looked down at him and kept her face stern, ignoring the stirring in her stomach as he placed his hands on her knees. "If, Sweeney, if. I don't want to live like that anymore, alright? It's too much." Nellie swallowed and avoided his eyes, looking down at her lap.

Standing up, he placed his hand beneath her chin and lifted it softly. "Pet... once there is no Judge, and there will come a time when he will come to me, then there will be no more ifs."

Her eyes softened after a moment as she looked up at him, and she could feel the ice in her heart melting again despite how much she wanted to freeze the whole thing over. "I..." She lowered her gaze and swallowed, frowning. "Only one month?"

"One..." He moved his hand to her cheek and stroked it lightly. She sighed shakily and looked back into his eyes.

"Please, keep that promise."

"I will do all that I can..." He ran his thumb along her cheek slowly, trying to keep her from crying. She let out another shaky sigh and her eyes softened completely.

"It hurts so much to see you go again..."

"I know pet, but it... it must be done." He tucked a curl back behind her ear, keeping his voice soft and low. Nellie swallowed and nodded a bit as she got up, looking into his eyes.

"Now... come here, pet," he stepped back a bit and beckoned her towards him. She walked to him softly and he took her into his arms, caressing her back and putting a hand on the side of her stomach. "There we are... are you feeling better?"

She snuggled against him and let out a last shaking sigh. "Mmh..." He had done it again. Broken her back into his arms.

" Come on... let's get you dressed for bed. You've had a long, exhausting day of derailing my customers." He let go of her and went to the wardrobe, rifling through it until he found one of her white linen night dresses. Nellie bit her lip and watched him as he turned back to her. "Do you need help with any of the laces?"

She took the gown and looked away from him. "Sure..."

Walking behind her, he began to untie the laces of her dress, pulling it down into a pool around her feet. She smiled a bit despite herself, keeping her gaze low.

"You don't always need to look away..." He whispered next to her ear and wrapped his arms around her waist softly, pulling her back to his chest. She smiled a bit more and placed her hands over his arms, snuggling against him. He placed a kiss on her shoulder before pulling away and taking the night dress from her. He opened the back and held it out for her to step into. Nellie stepped into it slowly, putting her hands on his shoulders to steady herself.

Pulling the gown up he walked behind her and laced her loosely into the garment. She bit her lips as he did and when he walked back in front of her he noted it carefully.

"What is it, pet?"

"Nothing..." She smiled a bit and leaned to kiss him softly. "I'm just so tired..." She sighed and kept her gaze on his chin. She was drained and she wasn't sure she would have the energy if he wanted a full reconciliation.

"You should rest then..." He took her hand and guided her back to the bed. Nellie nodded, letting him lead her, and lay down on the bed slowly, turning onto her side. As she turned away from him, he took off his shirt and pants, wanting to feel her pressed against him fully. Even if nothing sexual came from it.

Crawling into bed, he drew her back against his chest. Nellie closed her eyes feeling his arms and smiled a bit, snuggling. He placed a hand on the side of her stomach and stroked it softly, swallowing a bit as a small bump responded from her womb. "Have you thought about names, pet?"

Nellie bit her lip, smiling widely and hoping he was truly interested. "Mmmm... William... Carolyn... Elizabeth."

"I would have thought you would want to name the child something less common," he sighed and placed a few small kisses on the back of her neck.

"I just didn't really think about it to be honest... Maybe Elly... I don't know." She smiled softly as he kissed her neck.

"Too common." He slipped a hand under her night dress silently grabbing a breast and running a thumb over her nipple as he continued to kiss at her neck. Nellie moaned softly, closing her eyes. Maybe she did have a little energy...

"Then choose..."

He growled into her ear softly, moving his hand between her thighs. "Helena... isn't that a form of Eleanor?" As he spoke he began to stroke her clit with his thumb.

"A-ah..." Nellie bit her lip as she moaned. "Y-Yes... that's pretty..."

"Then Helena it is if it's a girl," he spoke lowly and bit her shoulder lightly, moving two fingers into her. "We can worry about a boy another night."

Nellie closed her eyes as he began to pump his fingers slowly, exhausted but wanting him to continue. "Sweeney..."

"Are you still angry with me, pet?" He smirked and began to kiss along her shoulders as he moved his fingers faster.

"M-Maybe..." she moaned louder as he worked and squirmed a bit at his touch.

"Just maybe?" He whispered playfully into her ear, adding a third finger into her gently.

"It's a little hard to stay m-mad right now..." Her breathing quickened and she hoped three was all he would use.

"What about after?" Moving her closer as he worked, he put his other hand down the front of her night gown, running his thumb over her nipples.

"Ah, God... Sweeney..."

"Answer me..." He growled softly and moved his fingers faster, pinching lightly at her nipples.

"N-No... I'm not mad-" Nellie let out a loud moan, feeling close. "Aaaah!" She arched her back and bit her lip.

After she came, he pulled his fingers out slowly and turned her towards him. Lifting his hand up to the light he could see them glistening from being inside her and smirked a bit. "And you say I'm selfish, pet."

Nellie raised an eyebrow and brought his fingers to her lips, licking them clean. "Yes. You are."

He raised an eyebrow back at her as she cleaned his fingers slowly. "Naughty... Tell me, pet... if I'm so selfish why would I pleasure you so intensely?"

"You want something back... don't you?"

"I never said that I did. Just because I have an erection doesn't mean that I intend for you to take care of it." As he spoke he tucked a rebellious curl back behind her ear, still trying to treat her as sweetly as he could.

"Mmmh..." Nellie wasn't sure what he was trying to do but she wasn't going to start a fight. Instead she put her head on his chest and her arm around him.

He drew her closer and placed a kiss to the top of her head, feeling a slight tingle whenever a stray hair would move against his chest. "There we go, Nell..." He began to rub circles onto her back softly, hoping she would sleep soon.

Nellie sighed and relaxed against him, smiling a bit, and began to stroke his chest hair softly.

"You mustn't doubt me so easily, pet," as he spoke he moved the blanket up to her shoulders.

"Well... stop deceiving me, then." Nellie swallowed and bit her lip, hoping that the fight wouldn't begin again. Feeling him sigh beneath her she calmed a bit and she relaxed completely again as he ran a hand through her curls.

"I only hurt you for your own protection, pet."

Nellie looked up then and gave him a stern look. "I don't need to be protected."

"Yes, you do. Far more than you think."

"No," she said firmly. "No, no, no. Sop that. It's completely ridiculous."

"What is? That I want to protect you?" He raised an eyebrow in disbelief. Since when was it an insult to have someone want to protect you?

"No..." She sighed looking at him. "No that... that's kind of cute actually..." She paused and bit her lip. "But hurting me for my own good..."

"It had to be done..."

Nellie sighed heavily and put her head back down on his chest. "Alright. Whatever."

"Don't frustrate yourself, pet..." He kissed the top of her head, the guilt starting to weigh heavily on his heart. "Soon I will never have to hurt you again..."

Nellie frowned but didn't say anything. She couldn't take the stress of another fight.

"Come now... I put so much effort into your forgiveness... don't get upset..." Sweeney began to stroke her hair lightly again and Nellie sighed, nodding against his chest.

"Look at me, pet."

Nellie sighed again but did as he bid her, looking up at him once more.

"My little Nellie... you need to trust me... Trust me. My little lamb... my pet..."

Nellie bit her lip and her eyes softened for a moment as she studied his face. After a moment she nodded softly. She didn't want to... but he didn't look like he was lying... he didn't sound deceiving...

"Am I forgiven?" As he spoke he moved her from his chest so that he could turn on his side to face her. Nellie took a long and shaky breath, keeping her gaze low.

"Mmmh..."

"Is that a yes?" He trailed a hand down her cheek, trying to get her to look at him without being forceful.

"Of course you are..." Nellie gave him a quick smile, not daring to look at him. It was going to be so hard to trust him...

"Then why do you look so upset?"

"You can forgive but you can't forget... You should know that very well, 'pet.'"

"I do..." Sweeney swallowed and leaned to kiss her softly, biting her lower lip gently before pulling away. "I'm sorry that I had to do what I've done..."

"It's fine..."

"Don't become bitter with me so easily..." Her drew her closer against his chest and held onto her tighter than he normally did. "There's a reason to all that I do..."

Nellie held him in her own embrace as tightly as she could, holding back tears as he spoke and buried her face in the crook of his neck. "I know..."

He tightened his own grip as she did and swallowed. "Good night... my little Nellie..."

Nellie felt a single tear escape her eye and bit her lip. "I love you," she said quietly against his neck. "Night, love..." She closed her eyes and after a while, fell asleep, her grip on him loosening.

As she slept he placed a kiss onto her brow and kept his grip on her tight. "I'm sorry, Lucy..."