"So... it's Sunday again".
"Mhm".
"And we have to review the second most voted story"...
"Mhm".
...
...
"Yinshen, can't we just"-
"No Mike, we're not skipping this week. Sorry but you're going to have to review the harem fics whether you like it or not".
"Fine"...
Not bothering to argue any further, Mike grudgingly grabbed the first story he could reach, not bothering to read the title.
"Aren't you going to at least tell us the name of the story"? Yinshen asked, crossing her arms.
"Is there even a point? Most of these harem fics are the same. Meaningless character development, random shippings of the female gender and lemons. Seriously that's all there is to it. I could write one of these if I wanted to"!
Harem fic story
Ever since Po had become the Dragon warrior, Tigress had developed feelings for Po and had decided to date him, despite not ever being mentioned or explained how or why she's dating him. However, little does Po know that Tigress is hiding a secret. She's actually a lesbian! With Viper! And Song! Also Fenghuang, scorpion, pretty much any female character you can think of will probably be in a relationship with Tigress. Once again, never explained WHY or HOW this has happened, but screw it! It's lesbians so everyone will read this fic regardless.
However, before talking to Po about this secret, she decides to talk to Viper about it. However, instead of Viper being the sweet, motherly snake with a heart of gold everybody knows her to be, her personality has been changed so that she is now a perverted creature of lust who wants to screw every person she meets. Tigress finds Viper and brings her to her room so that she can talk. But first things first, Viper wants her, so... lemon inbound.
ONE LEMON LATER THAT MORE OR LESS GOES ON FOR MOST OF THE CHAPTER...
"I love you Tigress". Viper hisses in a sexy tone.
"I love you too Viper. I love you so much that I'm willing to risk being banished from the Jade Palace for this foul dishonourable act we've performed together, but we don't need to worry since no one will find out or just won't care".
"So, what did you need before I randomly decided to have sex with you"?
"I am thinking of maybe going a few rounds with him later tonight. I mean, yeah we've just started dating, but a day in a relationship for harem fics such as this one is like several years in a sexually inactive marriage".
"Then you do that. I have no objection as long as I get to screw around with someone. As you know, if I'm not doing one of the main characters that I'm in a relationship with, then I'll probably end up doing it with someone else like Crane since people like that shipping".
"Very well. I shall see you later Viper". Tigress smiled before kissing Viper once more. The mouth to mouth action was so crazed it was like they were trying to eat each others faces.
Finally after ten minutes of non-stop kissing, Tigress FINALLY leaves Viper to hunt down someone else and mate with them, since she's completely disgusting with her harem personality, and goes to talk to Po.
Not surprisingly, Po accepts Tigresse's life style and decides to screw her, right where Tigress found him. In the kitchen... But that doesn't matter, neither does the fact that Po is new and innocent to such a large step in a relationship, but somehow his confidence is through the roof and he works his magic like a pro.
LEMON INBOUND!
"Okay, skipping this scene"... Mike hissed, flipping over to the next page. "Skipping... skipping... skipping"...
...
...
"Any day now Mike".
"Hey, it's not my fault! Every time the lemon's over a random female appears and the cycle starts all over again! I'm on the fifth lemon in a row here now and it's taking up a good portion of the story"!
...
...
"Ah, okay I got it! I got it! We're done with the sex scenes! Bad news is we've got very little of the actual story left".
So, after the multiple sex scenes, Po is happily lying in his bed with Tigress. And Viper, Song, Fenghuang, some random OC who was introduced but had as much personality as a rock, and many many more... The scene was... unlike any other. The only sounds that could be heard from outside the room were the multiple sounds of panting and moans. There were so many females that had mated with Po that it was surprising that he isn't going to catch some sexually transmitted disease from all the screwing he has just done. Plus what with all those women wanting him he was probably as active as a stuffed animal doll after the third lemon. However it seems that Pandas have incredible amounts of stamina apparently, so he seemed quite relaxed and ready for round... 34? Eh, around that I'm sure.
So bottom line, Po marries every female that loves him and has sex with every. Single. One. He has too many kids to count, and nobody really cares what happens next unless it contains more lemons, if they've stuck around until the very end, in which case God help you.
THE END
"Oh thank goodness, it's over". Mike sighed. "I am really not a fan of these kinds of fics".
"Yeah, just as well we're done".
"Just one more fic to go and we can finish this story"!
"Unless someone has another kind of fic anyone out there wants us to make fun of"..?
"SHHHH! Don't encourage them"! Mike hissed.
"But, we'll worry about that in the comments section. Oh, and by the way Mike, I'd get rid of that book. Like right now".
"Yeah, no kidding. The internet's messed up already without having to add this into the mix". Mike replied, staring at the book the disgust before leaving to burn the repulsing story.
"So, thanks for reading guys. We'll see you next week in what may be the final chapter of this story. Cheers".
...
Okay guys here is the next chapter for the story, hope you liked it. Sorry, it may seem a little short but I had to write this in an hour after my laptop shut itself down and erased everything that I had. So I was kind of in a rush since this was meant to be submitted on Sunday. Plus I'm tired and exhausted after doing three hours of sport :( So I've done what I can to restore what I can and I hope y'all got a laugh out of it.
If anyone does have another kind of KFP fic they would like me to do, leave a comment and I'll try to do what I can. Cheerio!