I took Adam's hand and he pulled me to my feet.

"We'll be back in a bit," Adam told Hannah, and she smiled at both

of us.

We walked outside and down the porch steps, and Adam started walking down

our long driveway, still holding onto my hand.

Adam didn't say anything at first, and I began to wonder when he would.

I started to feel a little bit nervous again. Adam had seemed relaxed all evening, not

angry, but when I looked at his profile he looked real serious, like he was thinking hard

about something.

"Where are we going?" I asked him quietly.

"Just takin' a walk, that's all."

When we got to the end of the driveway, Adam stopped and let go of my hand,

leaning against one of the big boulders there.

I stood beside him for a minute. He looked in the sky, at the reddish-orange sun

that was beginning to set.

"Isn't that somethin' to see?" he said to me.

I nodded. "Beautiful."

Adam reached down and picked up a twig that had blown off a nearby tree.

He reached into his pocket, and pulled out a pocketknife, starting to shave the twig.

"I'm not going to say a whole lot to you about what happened, Harlie," he said,

and I let out a breath of relief that I hadn't known I was holding in.

"I know by now, you understand the seriousness of the whole thing. Right?"

"Yes. I do. I've done a lot of thinking lately, Adam. I'm going to smarten up. I just

want a chance to prove it to all of you."

"Okay. I'm not going to scold you any more than you have been already." He turned

to look at me. "I do want to tell you a story, though."

"Okay," I said, curious.

"It's kind of a long story. Can you hop up here, and sit?" He gestured to the

boulder.

I nodded, and Adam gave me a boost up, and then hoisted himself up to

sit beside me, still whittling the twig.

"You know that John and I have been friends a long time, right?"

I nodded, knowing he was talking about John Green, who's been around our house

as a friend of Adam's as long as I can remember.

John is a funny guy, given to teasing the boys and me, too, and he shoots hoops

with Evan and Ford whenever he comes over to eat with us. He usually manages to

beat the boys at playing horse, too, despite the fact that he's in a wheelchair.

"You've been friends since high school, right?" I said.

"Further back than that. More like fifth grade, when his folks moved here

from Colorado."

I waited, wondering where Adam was going with this conversation.

"We've had some real good times," Adam continued. "Got in our share of trouble,

too."

I'd heard stories of their escapades. "Like the time you told Brian to push Crane

out of the hay loft, so you and John could catch him in that big net," I said.

For a minute, Adam smiled. "Yeah. Those were good times, alright." He threw the twig to the ground

and put the pocketknife back in his jeans pocket.

He looked out over the mountains in the distance.

"John wasn't in that wheelchair then."

"He was in an accident later, right?"

"Yeah. A car accident. We were about Guthrie's age then."

There was another small silence.

"I was with John when he was in that accident," Adam said quietly.

I looked at him, stunned.

"You were?"

"Yeah."

"I didn't know that."

"Yeah."

I wanted to ask questions, but I sensed that Adam was going to tell it at his own

pace. "There was another friend with us, too, Mitch Clark. We called ourselves The

Three Musketeers. Where one of us was, the other two were generally right beside.

Like with the net catching Crane, Mitch was there, too, holding the other corner."

Adam took a breath. "Mitch was driving that afternoon of the accident. He'd borrowed his daddy's

truck. We were going camping for the weekend. He was driving too fast. He

took a corner too quick, up at The Bend."

I waited in dread for what came next. I'd heard about all the accidents that have

happened on the hill outside of Murphys, known simply by locals as The Bend. I've

heard Adam caution all the boys and Hannah, too, about being safe there. I'd

always thought he was just being overly protective. Now I knew he had spoken

from painful personal experience.

"The truck rolled a bunch of times before it stopped. Mitch and I couldn't get

John out, so Mitch stayed there with him, and I hiked back to town. Actually, ran back to town

is what I did. I used the pay phone at the gas station, and I called Dad."

Here, Adam took another deep breath.

"What did Daddy say?" I asked, the word Daddy sounding foreign and strange, yet

precious to me, coming from my mouth.

"I was crying so hard he couldn't make heads or tails out of what I was

saying. He finally got the basics out of me, told me to wait there for him to

pick me up, and he called the ambulance and sheriff."

"We stood there and watched while they dug John out of that old truck. He was

screaming." Adam sighed deeply, painfully. "He just kept screaming."

I brought my knees up tight against my chest and rocked back and forth,

wishing I could cover my ears.

"They took us all to the hospital. Mitch had a sprained wrist, and I had cuts and

bruises. John had been in the hospital for over a month, when the doctors

said he was going to be paralyzed. Mitch and I kept hoping, and John's folks did, too,

but it just wasn't meant to be."

I swiped at tears on my face, watching Adam's face as he relived all that pain.

"Mitch and I would sit around talking about what we'd all do once John was

back to normal again. Making plans for all three of us. The day we found out for sure

John wasn't going to walk again, Mitch and I sat and cried together, up in our

hayloft. When he left that afternoon, he said he'd call me later."

Adam stared out at the sun, almost completely set now. He looked like

he was somewhere far away, lost in pain, and I saw the tears

in his eyes.

"Mitch went home and got his dad's gun, and went to the attic, and

shot himself in the head."

I covered my face with my hands, wanting to scream at Adam to be quiet,

not to talk any more, to just stop!

Adam turned to me, bringing himself back from that long ago dark place in his

memory. "The guilt he felt for being the driver was just too much for him. He blamed himself. He

just couldn't handle it."

"Oh, Adam!" I squeezed his arm.

" Yeah." He sighed, trying to bring his emotions under control.

"I'm sorry that happened to John," I said, "so very sorry."

"Well, he's made of something strong. He's made a life despite that damn wheelchair."

"I'm sorry that it happened to you, too."

Adam looked at me in surprise. "I made it out alright, Harlie."

"No, you didn't. Not really," I said, squeezing him harder. "You lost a good friend. And you watched

another one fight a battle that he's still fighting, every single day of his life, in that wheelchair. You weren't

ever the same boy again, after that day, were you?"

Adam stared at me for a long moment, and then he put his arm around my

shoulder. He shook his head, pulling me to him tightly.

"How the hell did you get to be so smart?" he asked quietly.

"Because I was raised by Adam McFadden," I said, looking up at him.

For the first time since he'd started the story, Adam smiled a little.

"Is that right?"

"Yes, sir."

"Will you do something for me?"

"Anything, Adam."

"Follow your own beliefs. Don't be talked into situations." He rested his chin

on the top of my head. "Try to be safe."

"I promise."

Adam kissed my forehead, and stood up, holding out his hands.

"Ready to go back to the house?"

"Yeah." I took his hands and he lifted me down.

This time it was me that reached out to hold Adam's hand, as we walked back up

the driveway. The house loomed, all lit up and welcoming, like a safe haven.

"You were trying to make me think, when you told me all this, weren't you?"

"That was my plan," Adam said.

I stopped at the front door, looking up at him. "Well, you succeeded."

"That's good."

"I think we should have John over this weekend for a BBQ, or something," I said.

Adam smiled. "I think so, too."

7777777

When I headed up to bed that night, I gave Adam an extra hard hug.

"Did you need to take your medicine?" he asked me.

"Crane, will you bring it up?" I asked Crane. "I want to ask you something."

"I'll be up soon," he said.

When I got upstairs I got ready for bed, and then sat on my bed, holding the

dolphin Guthrie had brought me.

Crane came up with my milk and medicine, and I asked him to put my dolphin up on

one of my shelves. He's so tall that he only had to reach a little bit to set it down.

"Crane?"

"What?"

"If you could have something that you really want, what would it be?"

"A Ferrari."

"I'm serious."

"What makes you think I'm not serious?"

"Crane," I said in reproval.

"I don't know, peanut. I don't need a lot. I'm a pretty basic kind of guy."

"Everybody has something they want, Crane."

"Okay. I guess some new books."

"Books?" I gave him a disbelieving look. "You're kidding."

"No, I'm not kidding. What's wrong with that?"

"Books are fine, but I mean something else. Something you would really

want, but probably wouldn't buy for yourself."

Crane looked thoughtful for a minute. "Alright, then. A computer."

"A computer, huh? To keep records on and stuff?"

"Yeah. Ranch expenses, cattle numbers, stuff like that."

"I bet that would help a lot, wouldn't it?"

"I think it would. Why all the questions?"

"I was just wondering. Are they really expensive?"

"They are. Definitely more money than this poor boy has."

"Oh."

Crane went to the door, his hand on the light switch. "Ready for the light off, or are you going to read?"

I curled up under my blankets. "Lights off. Night, Crane."

"Night, peanut."

7

After breakfast the next morning, Hannah caught me as I was about to slip outside for a few minutes.

"Come here," she said, looking serious.

"What's wrong?" I asked, walking back to her.

"Take your hair down," she said, and when I did, she ran her fingers thru it.

"When did you brush your hair last?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Umm, about a week ago," I said, and smiled at her.

"Harlie Marie."

"Well, it hurt too much to brush it, Hannah! It pulls on my back something awful."

"Then you should have asked one of the boys to brush it for you. This is a mess!"

"Sorry," I said, trying another smile.

"Oh, for Heaven's sake! Go up and get your hairbrush, and I'll see what I can do with it," she said,

and smiled back at me.

We sat for a long time on the front porch, me sitting cross-legged in front of Hannah, while she brushed

out the knots and snarls in my hair.

I didn't even mind it so much when she had to pull, it was just nice sitting there with her.

7 = love

I was writing my report on Theodore Roosevelt, sitting on the front porch swing,

when Daniel came around the house, and up the front steps.

"Hey, squirt," he said, sinking down beside me.

"Hey."

Daniel reached over and took a brownie from the plate I'd brought out to munch

on. "Good brownies," he said. "Hannah sure has the touch, doesn't she?"

"I made these," I informed him.

Daniel looked at me, and then went into his comedy routine, clutching at his

throat, and falling against me, making choking noises.

"Help," he gasped. "Poi-soned, get hel-p!"

I shoved him away. "You're funny, you should be on the Tonight Show with

Johnny Carson."

Daniel sat up straight. "Good thought. Bet he'd looove my singing."

"Well, actually I was thinking more of the animal segments he does with

that zoo lady." I told him, with a smug smile. "Maybe you could fill in for one

of the trained monkeys."

"You wound me, squirt, you really do."

I giggled.

"What are you doing tonight?" I asked him.

"It's Saturday night, I have a date, of course."

"Oh."

"Why?"

"I was going to ask you a favor."

"What?"

"I want to go into Sonoma, to the mall."

"What for?"

"I want to get Crane something."

"You have money?"

"Yeah. Some."

Daniel got to his feet, stretching. "Let's go."

"You said you had a date," I said, looking at him hopefully.

"I'll make a call. I can go later," he said, and I smiled, standing up to hug him.

"Thanks." Then I remembered. "If Brian says I can. I'm still grounded."

"Go ask him. I'll change my shirt."

I found Brian in the barn, forking loose hay into a wheelbarrow.

I told him what I wanted to do, and that Daniel was willing to take me.

"It's alright with me," Brian said.

"Thanks, Bri. And it's kind of a surprise, so please don't tell Crane, okay?"

"Hey, I know how to keep a secret."

#7

Daniel took me out for pizza when we first got to Sonoma.

I ate almost as much as he did, and Daniel started laughing when I reached

for my third piece.

"It feels good to be hungry again," I said.

"I'll bet. Your back's feeling better, too?"

I nodded around my mouthful of pizza.

Daniel laughed again and tossed a napkin at me. "Wipe your mouth, cheese face. I can't

take you anywhere."

I wiped my mouth and asked, "Who was your date with tonight?"

"Marty Foster."

"Hmmm."

"What's that look about?" he asked.

"I don't have a look. Marty's nice."

"But..."

"But I think she has marrying on her mind. I heard her and Brewster almost took

the plunge into matrimony."

"Well, I'm not her guy for that. She knows that."

"Okay," I said doubtfully, and Daniel took a drink of Coke, frowning at me.

"Now, what?"

"Marty McFadden," I said, pretending I was drawing it in the air. "It has a certain flair to it."

"Do you want to go home instead of the mall?" he threatened.

"No, Daniel."

"Then hush it."

"Okay, okay. Just trying to point out that since the wedding with Brewster was called

off at the last minute, she probably already has a wedding dress hanging in her closet."

He favored me with a dark look. "Marty and I have an understanding. She knows I'm going to

be gone one of these days, heading to Nashville-"

Daniel had spoken quickly, thoughtlessly, putting into words one of my biggest fears. Him leaving. Him not being around. And just like that, the lighthearted teasing of the last few minutes evaporated, like your breath on a cold morning.

I set my glass of Coke down, and said, quietly, "I'm ready to go when you are."

Daniel looked stricken. "Come on, squirt, don't be like that."

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Maybe we should talk about it."

"I'm ready to go to the mall."

I stood up and looked at him.

Daniel sat still, and he had a stubborn look on his face that I recognized.

"Since I'm driving, I decide when we go. Sit down."

I rolled my eyes heavenward, leaning on the back of my chair.

"Harlie, SIT DOWN."

Well, there were two reasons that I sat back down in my vacated chair. One: years of being obedient to hulking older brothers isn't easily dismissed; and two: Daniel never, and I mean NEVER, calls me Harlie.

I gave an exaggerated sigh, and sat back down.

"Why don't you want to talk about it?" he asked quietly.

"You know, Daniel, for a smart guy like you, that's a really dumb question."

"Okay," he agreed. "I'll give you that. It was a dumb question."

"Duh."

"Can you drop that tone and we have a grownup conversation, please?"

"Alright. I know you want to go sometime. I know you have to go. I want you to be happy, Daniel.

I just don't like thinking about it."

"I'm not going anytime soon, squirt."

"But you will eventually go. And when you do, well, you won't be HERE. It will be hard not talking to you whenever I want. Not getting to hang out with you, like we are tonight."

"It'll be hard for me, too. But there is such a thing as telephones, you know."

"It's not the same thing, and you know it."

"No, it's not the same. You're right about that. But I will come home sometimes, and you can visit

me."

"I could come to Nashville?" I asked him.

"Well, Nashville, or wherever I am, sure."

"That sounds like fun," I admitted. I fiddled with the paper off my

straw. "It's just hard to think about you being so far away, Daniel."

We were quiet for a couple of minutes, and Daniel blew his straw

paper across the table at me.

"Ready to go?" he asked.

"Yeah."

Daniel paid the check, and we drove to the mall, both of us

quiet, until I spoke. "When are you thinking you'll go?"

"I don't know exactly when."

"But you have a pretty good idea of when, don't you?"

"After I get a little more money together."

"You said we'd have a grownup conversation," I reminded him. "I'm

asking you straight out, Daniel."

He looked at me, and then back at the road. "Alright," he said,

quietly. "Probably within six months or so."

I caught my breath sharply. I thought I'd been ready for his

answer, no matter what it was, but six months! I looked

out the window, blinking back tears. "Oh."

Daniel pulled into the mall parking lot, and shut off his truck.

"I'm always gonna be there for you," he said. "It may have to

be kind of a different way, but I'll always have your back, squirt. You

know that's true. Don't you?"

"Yeah, I know." I turned to look at him. "I know I sound like I'm only

thinking about myself, and how I'm going to feel. But I am proud of

you, Daniel, of your talent. Very, very proud."

"I'm proud of you, too, so I guess we're even."

"Why are you proud of me?" I asked.

"Are you serious, or just fishing for a compliment?"

"I'm not fishing. I just mean, I'm such a mess sometimes. I'm

always doing something dumb."

"Sometimes you do, but you're learning. I'm proud of you for lots of

reasons. You're smart, and you're compassionate. You care about other

people. You have a gift with animals, and you've got music in your veins

just like I do."

"Want to know something? That I haven't told anybody but Guthrie?"

"What?"

"I'm thinking about veterinary school."

Daniel whistled, looking suitably impressed. "Wow. That's fantastic. A very lofty

ambition."

"Your grade point average has to be incredible to even think about it."

"You can swing it, no problem."

"I'd have to get scholarships. It'll be expensive."

"Yeah. And I'll help you with money, as much as I can."

I smiled at him. "Thanks."

"Feeling better?"

I nodded.

"Let's do the mall crawl," he said, and we got out to walk in.

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