Act 1 – Chapter Six: En Passant

Sometimes, I wonder whether or not I should try staying in the library overnight. I spend enough time there, and it seems a waste of effort to leave in the evening only to be straight back there the following morning. I'm certain Yuuko wouldn't mind. Then again, although the teachers are lenient about my skipping classes, I think they would take a much dimmer view of me actually moving into the library. I bring it up because yet again, the library is where I find myself during the festival, away from all the stalls and crowds outside.

I used to go somewhere else during this time. A quiet clearing in the woods, just off campus. Nobody else seemed to know about it, and I used it as another place of refuge when Yamaku became too busy for me to stay. Then someone thought it would be a good idea to go there with their family for a picnic, and my safe haven was no longer so much of a haven. Last year I chose to stay in the dormitory, figuring that everyone would be at the festival instead of staying in their rooms. Then I realised it would mean barricading myself in my own bedroom – too late for me to escape without running into the crowds again. I didn't think how people would be showing their families their rooms and spending time there during the day. I ended up staying in my own room for the entire festival period, not even leaving for the bathroom, nor to eat. Not so great a time for me.

So this year, I decided to leave as early as I could, before people started arriving for the festival. And now I find myself sitting in my beanbag reading through another new novel, listening to the faint sounds of the revelries outside. I have no desire to go out there and join everyone. I'm more than happy to sit here on my own, curled up with a good book.

It's something of a surprise to hear Hisao's voice, when I assumed he would be with Lilly enjoying the festivities.

"Hey, Hanako. I had a feeling I'd find you here..." Hisao's intuition serves him well, it seems.

I jump a little, before slowly poking my head above the low block of shelves separating the two of us. "H-Hisao?" I wonder why he isn't outside, actually.

"Hey. Lilly's pretty busy, so she sent me to find you." The answer to my unspoken question is brief, but it makes sense. Lilly would be concerned, after all. It's just how she is. Neither she nor Hisao would have really expected me to be with the masses of people, so coming here was the obvious step.

"O-oh," I reply. "Do you want to sit down?"

"Actually, I'm feeling a little hungry," says Hisao. "Would you like to get something to eat from one of the stands?"

I guessed he would try this. Sometimes, it looks like Hisao can be as bad as Lilly, trying to get me to act a little more 'normal', or at least be more social. Fortunately, I came prepared. I knew I wouldn't get a chance to go and eat elsewhere during the day anyway.

"Um... I... I brought some food, so..."

Hisao frowns a little as I foil his plans, but he doesn't give up. The compromise he offers is much easier for me to bear, though. "How about we eat in the tea room? I passed by it on the way here, and no-one was around. We can make some food there, and it'll be a little more comfortable. What do you say?"

I think it over, and realise he definitely does have a point. It's not like there's anywhere to prepare anything edible here in the library, whereas the tea room has facilities long ago installed for students before Lilly and I started attending Yamaku. Nobody else tends to go there, so it'll certainly be private. If I'm with Hisao, it won't be so bad.

"S-sure. Let's go." I close my current book and place it delicately into my bag.

"Good to go?" I notice Hisao watching my movements with a curious look on his face. What could he be thinking, I wonder.?

"Y... yeah." We leave together, and walk slowly along the deserted corridors to the tea room. Without any windows to let the sound in, the festival is barely audible. I focus on the floor ahead of me and start to forget that Hisao is even here. My steps start to fall into an old routine, a game of sorts from when I was younger. I remember the times not long after my accident, when the other children would tease me and abuse me for my scars. In my loneliness, I made up all sorts of games purely to distract myself. The games worked, to a point, and eventually I was able to bury my thoughts and emotions behind deep walls, walls that very few people have ever breached. Even Lilly hasn't managed to break the toughest ones down. The therapists try hard, but they too have always met with failure.

As we walk, I manage to completely forget Hisao, which makes it all the more startling when he speaks up.

"Are you alright?"

I stop, completely still. My eyes turn to meet Hisao's. "W-what?"

"I dunno... it looked like you were tripping or something."

So he noticed my footsteps. I feel my cheeks redden slightly and my gaze drops to the floor again. "It... it's nothing."

"You know," replies Hisao, "when you say 'nothing' like that, people are inspired to ask further questions."

I pause for a moment. He's absolutely right, and I should know that better than anyone. I've had the same situation several times before, when people have asked me questions that I don't want to answer. Mainly about myself, and my scars. Avoiding the issue only makes them more curious, until I have to flee the situation entirely. I realise that answering honestly is the best course of action, though I won't give away any information I don't have to. There's no real need for Hisao to know the whys and the hows of my little quirks.

He's almost started to continue walking when I smile a little, kind of embarrassed, and answer him.

"It's a... a game."

"Game?"

"Do you... see the floor here?" I point down at the linoleum tiles at our feet.

"Well, yes. What about it?"

"Sometimes... when there's no-one around... I only step on the darker ones..." My embarrassment at playing such a childish game grows as I finish speaking, but it hardly matters anyway. Truth be told, I do play it sometimes when walking with Lilly. She can't see me, of course, so it doesn't bother me with her being present. Occasionally though, I suspect she might be able to hear my erratic footsteps, but she's never commented on it. Not to me at least.

"Darker ones?" asks Hisao.

I shuffle my feet a little and point a toe to the kind of tile I mean. "L-like, these ones." Some are a shade darker than others, not usually noticeable except in strong light. But I seem to have a knack for picking the right kind. I've been playing this game since I was a little kid.

"Oh, right, so these ones are no good?" Hisao nudges his own feet towards another, very slightly lighter, tile.

"Y-yeah. Something... something like that."

"Oh, I see. Do you play this game a lot?"

I shake my head. It's kind of rare that I get the chance and actually decide to play. Which makes it all the more embarrassing when I do play it.

"Just when the halls are empty?" Now he gets it! I nod my head in confirmation.

"Well then," says Hisao, "no point in stopping. I'm beginning to get really hungry."

He says this as I can see the tiny miso soup stains on the bottom of his sleeve, and smell the strong flavours on his breath. Still, I agree with him. I'm getting pretty hungry too, so I nod my head again, but with a clear enthusiasm this time.

"Well then, let's go."

As we continue to walk, I make a conscious effort to get out of my old routines from childhood, stepping wherever I please without caring what colour each tile is. I can see something rather different in the corner of my eye, though. Looks like Hisao's caught the game bug as well. I try to suppress a small giggle, unsuccessfully, but I don't think Hisao heard it...

We soon reach the door to the tea room. We enter, and I move across to my regular seat, as Hisao walks to the window. He opens it and breathes deeply. I guess the air here is somewhat different to city air. Looking at Hisao, he strikes me as a city person, someone who's never really spent much time in a rural area like this. I learned how to judge people long ago, though my intuition isn't always spot on.

"Do... would you like some tea?" I ask, playing mother in Lilly's absence.

"That would be great, thanks."

I fill the pot and set it to boil, following the same traditional ritual Lilly always uses. Although I can see exactly what I'm doing, unlike her, I still take the same amount of care and consideration, both in the brewing and in making a set of sandwiches from my meagre packed lunch. It's not the first time Hisao's seen me do this, but I can feel his eyes on me, watching intently. For once, though, it doesn't bother me. I feel much happier to be alone with him after the effort he's shown this week. And it's nice to have someone here with me today, of all days, when I don't feel up to going outside with everyone else. Everyone deserves to be with someone on a day like this.

When the tea is ready, I place the tray with the pot and sandwiches on the table and pour two cups for us. Hisao's voice cuts through the silence, but the room remains calm.

"I think I know why you like this room now."

"Um... I don't know what you mean." I think I do, really, but I'd like to hear him say it.

"Well, there are quite a few people out there, but in here it's like another world. You can pretend that there's no-one around for miles."

"Y-you're right." And he is. Even with the windows open, a gentle breeze flowing in through the warm summer sun, the noise of the festival is almost unnoticeable. Looking out, I can't see anyone. This room is like a tiny little bubble inside Yamaku, one that's not quite ready to pop. "It's like the world has forgotten this room. And b-because of that, you can forget about the outside."

I smile at Hisao. I could do with forgetting so much. Even in Yamaku, I feel like an outsider. I stay away from people because I don't trust them enough, but it would be good for someone to make an effort, and at least try to be friendly. It never happens. Nobody bullies anyone here, because we're all in the same boat, but you can't throw a couple of hundred teenagers together and expect them to all get on alright, even when they're all united by something like our disabilities. We're still regular people, with everything that entails.

"That's a good point. It's like this room gives you some kind of complete freedom."

"Y-yeah." That's exactly it. Here, I feel like I can be myself. On that note... "Say... do you play chess?" I ask Hisao.

"Chess? I've played it a bit, I guess...I take it you've played before?"

"A little..." Or perhaps I'm something of a chess shark... then again, perhaps not. I walk over to a cupboard and pull out an old set. I usually play with Lilly, so the pieces are well worn, though they weren't exactly new when we first began to play the game together. It's Western chess, rather than Shogi, so I can't be sure how familiar Hisao is with it. Lilly often proves a challenging opponent, but her familiarity with Western culture would be a great help. I wonder if the specific cultural version of the game will be an advantage to me, or not so much?

"Do... do you want..." My query is lost in my nervous stammer, but Hisao realises what I was trying to say. Asking if he wants to be the White player, and start the game.

"Sure, why not?" We set the board up and take our positions, Hisao opening with his queen-side centre pawn moving two squares ahead. I respond with my opposite corner knight, and soon I find myself lost in the game, enjoying the moment of tranquillity. I used to play chess as yet another distraction, anything to keep my mind off the torment I suffered as a child. At least life got a bit better at the orphanage as I grew older. I suppose chess is also a reminder of happier times for me...

Hisao starts to build up a smart defence with his knights and pawns. I can see his plan, to free his king ready for castling. I try to counter with one of my bishops, but am soon driven back by his own, and lose control of the centre of the board. It looks like this game may be more of a challenge than I thought. I retaliate with my pawns, only for Hisao to engage in a risky sacrifice, losing a bishop to take one of my knights. Perhaps he thinks one is more valuable than the other? I wonder if I can use that to my advantage...

Another sacrifice, but a stupid one this time. Hisao sends his knight to attack one of my pawns, only to lose it to my remaining bishop. It's only afterwards that I realise how painfully obvious his plan was, and how I was a fool to miss it. His queen is already in place, and puts me immediately into check. With very few options open to me I choose to defend using my own queen. I realise it will lead to a mutual sacrifice, but I'd rather there be no queen on the board than have Hisao's queen ravaging my defence.

He takes the bait, and I take his queen with my king. I guess I can't castle now, which may have been his plan in the first place, removing another aspect of my defence. We continue on, and Hisao proceeds to wipe out my remaining central pieces, despite a suicidal yet brave attempt by myself to attack using my first bishop. A concentrated pawn attack is defended by one of Hisao's rooks, while his second remains unmoved in the corner. We exchange our remaining bishops, saving me from yet another check. Hisao's strategy has been very aggressive, forcing me to constantly react and giving no quarter for me to attack. What started as an equal match, a war of attrition, has quickly developed into an onslaught with a clear victor.

I take the chance to move my pawns on the unguarded left flank. My right, Hisao's left. He spots this quickly, however, and moves his knight into the empty space, driving my king back further. He reacts with his own flanked pawns and quickly takes advantage of my scattered positioning, before cornering my king with his knight, a solitary pawn, and a rook.

"Checkmate." The game is over. I'm quite surprised at how well Hisao played. I'm normally a pretty good chess player, but today was something of an off day. I guess I just wasn't as into it as usual, but it was nice to play against Hisao. I enjoyed it. I didn't feel quite as competitive as I tend to be. I can't even remember the last time Lilly managed to beat me. When I play chess, I like to win, though I'm nowhere near the insane levels of competitiveness as, say, Shizune. I wonder what it would be like, playing chess against her...

"You're not bad at this, are you?" I feel something new at Hisao's words, something I've not felt in a very long time. I'm actually flattered. I smile at Hisao, just slightly, but the happy sentiment I feel is much greater than that.

"I... I guess not," I reply.

"Does Lilly play?" He picks up a piece and studies it. Maybe he's wondering how a blind person could possibly play chess, at least with any amount of skill?

I pause at this. "A... a bit. T-this is the first time I've played against someone... other than her, or..." I stop suddenly. This is bringing up bad memories, reminding me of the exact reason why I'm at Yamaku in the first place. Why the people I played chess with are no longer around. I can't bring myself to tell Hisao why, so soon after we've met. Maybe one day, but I'm not yet ready.

Fortunately, Hisao knows when to leave well enough alone. "Well then, I'm honoured to have played against you."

I smile again, a more sheepish grin this time, glad that Hisao has the foresight and intuition to avoid pushing things too far. I feel bold enough to make a small request. "Um... can we play again?" I think this time, I'll be sure to win. I'm all fired up inside from the last game, even if I don't show it outwardly.

"Sure," Hisao replies. "Though don't expect me to go easy on you this time."

I can hear the competitiveness in his voice. My eyes narrow and I continue to smile, but with a far more mischievous look. I briefly consider what Hisao might think of my expression as I reply to his challenge. "S... same here..."

We begin setting the board up for our rematch, when I hear the door open. We both turn at the noise to see Lilly gently walking in. "Good afternoon."

"Lilly..." I start to speak at the same time as Hisao.

"Oh, hey there Lilly. Are you finished?" I guess he's referring to Lilly's class stall at the festival. I'd almost forgotten about it in the peace and calm of this room.

"You both are here? Wonderful. At any rate, our teacher was able to round up some extra help, so I was able to leave. Have you been here since you left?"

"Pretty much, we've just been playing a bit of chess."

I take the opportunity to interject. "W-would you like a cup of tea?"

"Actually," replies Lilly, "I think it may be a good idea to go outside for a little while."

Does she really expect me to agree to that? It's hard enough when I'm with a few classmates, how does she think I'll be able to cope with being in the crowds at the festival? There's a damn good reason why I chose to spend my day in the library and in here. Talk about trying to throw me in at the deep end! Still, I'm not in the mood for a confrontation with Lilly, so I say nothing. She can't see the change on my face, but Hisao can.

"I... I kinda think that we should just stay here..." Hisao comes to my rescue. I'm relieved when Lilly's next words reveal both mine and Hisao's error in judgement.

"Really? It's so crowded here that I was thinking we should leave the school and head for the local tea house."

"You mean the S-Shanghai?" That sounds like a much better plan. I quite enjoy going to the Shanghai, and Yuuko is likely to be working there today. I didn't see her in the library, after all.

"Of course. With everyone at the festival it should be practically empty." Just the way I like it.

"Tea house?" Of course, Hisao doesn't know about the Shanghai. He's not been there so far this week, I suppose. Well, it looks like Lilly and I will have to educate him.

"Oh, that's right," says Lilly. "You probably haven't heard of it. There is a tea house not far from here, which we go to every so often."

"Sounds like a plan." Hisao seems reasonably happy to visit there. "Hanako, what do you think?"

I jump slightly at being directly addressed, and have to fight the temptation to retreat into myself as I so often do. I'm glad that Hisao chose to seek my opinion though, rather than assuming I would be happy to go. As it turns out, I'm more than happy to visit the Shanghai, even if I feel a slight disappointment in abandoning our rematch. "If... if it's the Shanghai, I think it'll be nice." I don't just think it. I'm certain of it.

"Well then, it's settled. Let's be on our way." I notice smiles on everyone's faces to some extent. My own included. With a practised movement I quickly return the chess board and pieces to their proper place in the cupboard.

"Looks like we're ready now," says Hisao. "Please, lead on."

I walk close to Lilly, helping to guide her through the corridors, keeping clear wherever I hear too much sound. We make our way to the front gates, with Hisao following, and begin the descent down the hill. The noise from the festival is faint and the sun is starting to set, the sky a dark red.

"Strange," Hisao comments. "I thought that most people would be beginning to leave by now..."

"They're probably here to view the fireworks." I can hear just a hint of bitterness in Lilly's voice as she mentions the firework display that traditionally closes the school festival, but I'm not so sure Hisao notices.

"Fireworks?"

"Yes, apparently the school puts on quite a show. A lot of people come from town just to watch them."

I can't really blame them. The fireworks are visible from the town, so I won't be missing them, and for that I'm glad. They're the one part of the festival I can actually enjoy, and every year's display seems to be better than the last. It's good that we're headed out of the school, though. With so many people coming up, I'm better off downhill, though we see very few people walking the path. Most have already arrived, or plan to drive here. Still, I focus on the route ahead. Even the stares of the small number of fellow pedestrians is too much for me.

Soon enough, we've reached the Shanghai. From the outside it looks quite ordinary, but inside it's something else. I've rarely seen anywhere quite as traditional and rustic as the Shanghai, a quaint feel giving rise to a peaceful atmosphere that goes right through me. It's also quiet, since most of the town are now at Yamaku. Not that it tends to get too busy here anyway, though when it does I can easily hide in one of the high-backed booths. Yuuko always makes sure to reserve one if there's a chance Lilly and I will be stopping by. Speaking of Yuuko, she doesn't seem to be around right now...

"Er, is this place closed or something?" I find myself agreeing with Hisao's sentiment. Until a red-haired bespectacled figure suddenly jumps up from behind a booth.

"I wasn't asleep and welcome to the Shanghai!" Wasn't asleep. Right.

Yuuko rushes over from her resting place clutching a menu. Before she can say another word, however, Hisao asks the obvious question.

"You work here now? What happened to the library?"

"What? Lilly? Hisao?" I don't feel left out, like most people would at being ignored. Sometimes I suppose I can blend into the background a little too well, and Yuuko does look rather puzzled anyway. Best not to confuse her even more. "Welcome to the Shanghai!"

She bows low, much lower than one would expect a server to bow even in a place as old-fashioned as this. Her glasses, already askew from her 'not sleeping', slip even further down her face and fall to the floor. "Uweh? My glasses..." Hisao picks them up for her, while Lilly starts to explain to him why Yuuko is present.

"Yuuko works here part-time as well as at the library. It's one of the reasons we like to come here."

Yuuko takes her glasses back and responds, "Yes... that's right... thanks... Shall I show you to your table?" I look around and see nothing but empty tables. The place is completely deserted – as if Yuuko's snooze wasn't evidence enough of that. "There's no-one else here so you can choose your table and order whatever you like, but there may be a delay as I will have to make it myself..."

Lilly clearly agrees with me that there's no need to make a fuss. "It's all right, Yuuko. Just a pot of black tea and a plate of sandwiches will be fine."

"Right! I'll get right onto that!" Yuuko runs off towards the kitchens, only to return almost instantly. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please, sit wherever you like! I'll be right back!" Yuuko has pretty much been like this for as long as I've known her. Slightly neurotic, eager to please everyone yet always nervous that she isn't doing a good job of it. Still, she's a genuinely good person. I just think she could be a bit more relaxed sometimes.

Hisao takes the lead, guiding Lilly and myself to a booth near the entrance, and sits down. Lilly and I also sit, the booth effectively cutting us off from the rest of the tea house. If anyone else walks in they wouldn't even know we were here.

"So, Hisao," says Lilly. "I didn't know you played chess..."

"Well, not very well, but I do know how to play." I assume they're both talking about Western chess as opposed to Shogi. I've never actually played Shogi against Lilly, though it would be interesting to try. I find the tactical aspect so much more complex, and much more fascinating, but I don't know if Lilly has any idea of the different rules.

"I suppose the obvious question would now be... who won?"

Lilly has such an innocent smile on her face, but her real thoughts are locked to me. Such an enigma, I have no idea what she hopes to find out here. Hisao's pause gives me a clue, though. I see a frown on his face, while I look rather sheepish, but there's no way for Lilly to pick up on that. I guess she wants to test Hisao rather than me for once – maybe to see how he reacts to the question. Whether he's a gracious victor or a sore loser. Either way, I decide to put them both out of their misery.

"H-Hisao did."

"Yes... but, uh, not by much..." Hisao's voice is full of guilt for beating me. He appears to be downplaying the result purely so it doesn't seem like he hurt my feelings. I wish he wasn't treating me like a fragile doll, but I appreciate the sentiment. It's rather amusing to see him so flat footed.

"Well done, Hisao. You've accomplished something I've only ever failed at." To be fair, it is more difficult for Lilly to play chess. She has to remember the locations of all the pieces, keeping a detailed play-by-play run-through of the game in her head. Or feel every piece and remember which are black and which are white. Then again, blindfold chess is a good way to improve the strength of most regular players. Strictly speaking she should be getting much better with every game...

"Er, thanks," replies Hisao. "I haven't played in ages, so it felt good to play again."

"Y... yes... It did." My nerves show as I start to play with my hair a little, but I can't avoid a little smile.

As we discuss the chess game, Yuuko makes her return, carrying a tray with a large pot of tea, cups and saucers, and a plate of sandwiches. "Are you alright there, Yuuko?" asks Hisao. "Do you need a hand?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine. I have to do this properly, it's my job."

So obsessive about her work. She looks down at the tray, staring as if she's willing it to stay steady. It doesn't work. Everything is rattling hard as she gently lowers the tray, placing it on the table with a gentle crash. "There, see!"

"Err, well done?" says Hisao, looking rather baffled.

"Thank you, Yuuko," Lilly says. Yuuko bows once more, head low again.

"You're very welcome."

"Would you like to join us? There's something else I'd like to discuss about that recent order, if I may..." Lilly was telling me the other evening that she'd ordered a lot of books in Braille, as part of her duties as class rep. There was only a limited selection until a few weeks ago, and she told me the blind students were getting somewhat annoyed at what they felt was ignorance regarding their own requirements. Now they need sorting, and Lilly had agreed to help Yuuko organise them.

"Ah, yes," comes the response from Yuuko. "We didn't get the chance to go through them, did we?" She sits down quickly. "I'll be in the library tomorrow afternoon if you'd like to try again..."

"That sounds perfect. I'll meet you there after classes."

I interject here. Lilly's actually forgotten something rather important... "Um... L-Lilly..."

"Oh dear, that's right. Tomorrow is Monday, how could I have forgotten?" I can't really comment here, given what I did on Friday... "Well, perhaps we could come to some other arrangement..." Lilly says. "Yuuko, will you be in the library later this week?"

"Hmm, maybe, but this is already overdue..." Yuuko is pulling Lilly one way...

"A-and there are some... things I n-need..." And I'm pulling her the other. I feel bad, but I need to stand up for what I want for once.

"This might be a problem..." Lilly sounds defeated, but she has to make a choice. Of course, Lilly being Lilly, she decides to take a third option. "I wonder, might we be able to enlist the help of another, if need be...?"

Hisao picks up on who she's referring to, but he doesn't seem to understand what she means. "Um, to do what? You lost me quite some time ago..."

"Oh, of course. The other day I was helping Yuuko sort the new Braille books in the library. But Hanako and I usually go shopping on Monday afternoons; it's much quieter on that day than on weekends." Fridays are a rare occurrence, for essentials, but Mondays are the main shop for the two of us. And truth be told, I really do need to go tomorrow. For reasons that Hisao, as a man, would probably not understand... Lilly continues. "Last week we couldn't go because I was busy with the festival. I managed to slip away later in the week, but Hanako couldn't make it."

She's being quite diplomatic, telling a half-truth while sparing my embarrassment at forgetting to meet Lilly when I did. I'm grateful to her for that. I don't think I could easily face Hisao if he knew about my lapse of memory, although I wouldn't be surprised if he suspected something anyway.

"Well, since I can't read Braille, I'm assuming you'd like me to go shopping with Hanako?"

I look at Hisao with a face like a rabbit in headlights, as I'm certain I've looked before at him. I can't blame Lilly, though. It's a sensible request and solves the problem for her, if Hisao agrees to it. It might be nice to spend more time with him, but then again it might be pretty damn awkward. As usual. And I'd rather be with Lilly than Hisao when buying my... feminine essentials, but they can always wait a few more days.

"Correct," replies Lilly. "You were a great help to me the other day."

"I think I can handle that. Hanako, what do you think?"

It's hard for me to say anything, but I manage it anyway. I guess it won't be so bad, given the extent to which Hisao and I seem to be getting on now. At least, as much as I can get on with anyone. "I-if you wouldn't mind..."

"Of course not. I'm still not familiar with all the stores in the area, so it sounds like a good idea."

"O-okay." I can help him in learning more about the layout of the town, too, and maybe I'll get a chance to show how useful and how strong I can be. Maybe I'll have the courage to take the lead on tomorrow's little journey.

"Now that we have that arranged, shall we have some tea?" The pot is still sitting in the middle of the table, probably cold by this point. It doesn't matter much to me, I don't mind cold tea, but Yuuko still has her nerves shattered trying to make up for her apparent lack of duty.

"It's my fault! Let me pour that for you..." Hisao reaches the pot before she does, however, and starts to pour instead.

"It's alright, I've got it. Since you've already made the tea and sandwiches, you've fulfilled your waitress duties, right?"

"I... I guess..." She doesn't sound so sure.

Before we can begin eating and drinking, a loud bang is heard from outside, and a bright flash. I jump a little at the sound but soon realise what's going on.

"Ah, I take it the show has started." She may not be able to see the fireworks, but Lilly's hearing is as good as most people's. Possibly a bit better, to compensate for her lack of sight. Not that anyone but Shizune could fail to hear the explosions coming from the sky. Really though, I hadn't even realised how much time had passed since we left the school grounds.

"Let's go watch!" Yuuko's waitress duties are all but forgotten as she rushes across to the window, Hisao and I following close behind. "Oh... sorry, Lilly..." Maybe she heard the faint bitter tone in Lilly's voice too?

Lilly takes it in stride, though, and in her usual fashion is as charming and understanding as ever. "Please, don't miss the show on my account. From what I've heard, this isn't a bad location to watch them from."

I love the fireworks. It may seem odd, given the reasons for my condition, but there's always been something about the beauty of the lights in the sky that appealed to me. I know I'm not pretty, but I appreciate beauty elsewhere, regardless of its form. Bright lights shining against such a dark background. It's wonderful to see them before they burn themselves out and fade away...

Fade away they do. Soon enough the show is over, too quickly for my liking, but fireworks cost a lot of money, and even though Yamaku puts a massive amount of effort into the festival compared to other schools, it still has a limited budget to use. We turn to go back to the table with our tea and sandwiches. Before Hisao leaves the window, though, I turn to face him. I want him to know how grateful I am to him for making me feel less lonely. It's hard for me to say anything, especially considering how quiet I usually am, but the words come readily.

"Um, t-thanks for today... and tomorrow."

I smile at him as he replies. "That's okay. I don't think that I could have faced those crowds either. On days like this, it's more relaxing to spend some time away from everyone, don't you think?"

My sentiments exactly. "Y-yeah."

"Anyway, we've been delaying this tea for far too long now, let's get back."

"S-sure." He's right, but it's only as I sit down that I think about how cold the tea will be by this point. I lightly touch the side of my cup as Lilly begins to speak – sure enough, the cup is like ice.

"That sounded impressive," says Lilly, no trace of her earlier disappointment. "Bigger than last year's, at least."

Yuuko is full of excitement, her enthusiasm shining like the fireworks themselves. "Yeah, it was great! I've never seen them put on such a show. It gets better every year!"

"I'm afraid, however, that during that time the tea has gone cold." The frown on Lilly's face isn't one of annoyance, but rather a look of resignation, as if she's simply informing us of the state of our tea before we begin to drink. Yuuko doesn't take it that way, however. Not that she sees Lilly's comment as a criticism, but Yuuko is more prone to criticising herself. Maybe something we have in common? Except I have good reason to do so to myself, whereas she doesn't...

"Oh no! Let me make some more! This is my fault..."

"Calm down, Yuuko, it's nobody's fault." Again, Hisao is the voice of reason. Whenever he takes the chance to defend someone or help someone I feel conflicted. I dislike his tendency to be a white knight for everyone, and I hate it when Lilly does the same for me. I want to stand on my own two feet. But at the same time, seeing Hisao act in such a way for others is rather sweet. It makes me admire him even more. I'm really not sure what I should be feeling, as a matter of fact.

Hisao takes a sip from his cup of tea, licking his lips with clear enjoyment. "This tea isn't too bad cool, anyway. It's like an iced tea."

"Really?" asks Yuuko. I can agree with him actually. After tasting my own cup, I can see Hisao's point.

"Yes, really. If you add a bit of sugar it's kind of nice."

"Are you sure?" Yuuko the skeptic.

"I'm positive. Now, why don't you sit down, and we'll finish this together?"

"O-okay." She sits down in the only free space, next to Hisao. No sooner has she done so than she measures out five spoons of sugar and tips them into her teacup. I've often thought, seeing her drinking tea in her office in the library, that if she isn't careful she'll end up at Yamaku as a student herself. Diabetes, more than likely.

"Er, I said a bit of sugar..." Hisao is alarmed, while Lilly can't see the sheer amount of sugar Yuuko has taken.

"I know, but I like my tea sweet anyway." I'll say. Hisao looks across, into her cup, and I too steal a glance. The sugar is just a lump sitting at the bottom of the cup, even after stirring. Until Yuuko takes a large gulp, of course, and soon there's nothing left in her cup at all. "You're right! That's not bad at all!" she cries out.

"Er, good..." Hisao does the same, while Lilly and I are both already done. "Well then, it seems we're all finished."

"Should we head back now, or do we want seconds?" Lilly's query is reasonable, but I'm not exactly hungry any more, and I can see the look on Yuuko's face. She may take her work very seriously, perhaps a little too seriously, but even she has her limits. Hisao has also seen it, and heads off any further discussion on the matter early.

"I think that it would be best if we got back soon. We do have to get back before curfew, after all."

"Oh," replies Lilly. "That is a good point." Yuuko looks relieved, massively so, and I can hardly blame her. "I'll meet you tomorrow, Yuuko." Lilly is clearly referring to their arrangements regarding the Braille books.

"I'll be looking forward to it, Lilly. Goodnight, everyone."

We make our goodbyes and begin the long walk uphill, back to Yamaku. Because of the festival, curfew has been extended tonight, so we have more time to return than we would normally have, but we hurry anyway. I feel much less self-conscious walking in the dark, where fewer people can notice my scars, but I still lead us along a few more minor streets to avoid the bulk of the returning crowd. When we arrive at Yamaku, standing outside the dormitories, Hisao bids Lilly and I farewell.

"Well then, thank you both for today. I think I learned a lot."

"You're most welcome," says Lilly, "but I'm afraid that I really must be going. Today's been a long day." She has spent half of it on her class stall, after all, and the walk uphill can be very draining even when not carrying bags of shopping, as we usually do.

"Sure thing. Well then, I'll see you both tomorrow. Good night."

"Good night, Hisao," comes Lilly's response.

"N-night," I stammer. Lilly and I leave Hisao to his own journey back, as we walk across to the girl's dorm.

"So, how was it all for you?" Lilly asks. We're both aware the conversation won't be very long, as we are both somewhat exhausted after today, but I answer anyway.

"It was... fun. I-I enjoyed spending time with H-Hisao." I'm stuttering, as usual, but I'm smiling too. Lilly won't be able to see that, but she can surely hear the happiness in my tone of voice. She smiles too, in my general direction, as we enter the girls' dormitory building.

"I'm glad to hear it. You two get along so well..." With that, Lilly heads up the stairs alone, leaving me to wonder what she means. I get the feeling she senses something that I don't. Wondering at what that might be, I follow her upstairs and retreat to my own room for a well earned rest.