Dear Diary
So I've just celebrated my sixteenth birthday and well it wasn't as crazy as some other sweet sixteen birthdays. Although Caroline insisted on throwing a party I have to say that my favorite moment of my birthday was when Damon took Claire and me back to the Salvatore house and we had a little family party of our own. Damon made me a small cake and we took pictures of our little family enjoying the moment. It was a perfect way to celebrate.
The nights have gotten a lot better now that Claire is sleeping about six hours at night. With school starting up it will be good to have Claire sleeping pretty much through the night so that I won't be too tired at school. I'm not really looking forward to having to leave my baby girl during the day while I'm at school but I know it's something I have to. Over the last couple weeks I've tried to ease my nerves about leaving Claire by going for a run or to the movies with Caroline and Bonnie.
At four months old Claire can roll over from her stomach to her back. She isn't a fan of lying on her tummy so will scream bloody murder. When she first rolled over I got all excited and raced to get the video camera. She was not impressed when I made her do it again so that I got it on video.
She loves to play with her rattle and to babble away to herself when she is in her swing. Its like she found her voice and loves to make new noises to amuse herself. Colours and shades also fascinate her. We got her one of those music and motion activity gym and play mat that has bright colours and dangling toys for her to grab onto.
She is also getting so big and it seems that almost every week we end up having a stack of clothes that no longer fit her that we have donated to help other new parents. She grows so fast that I'm not sure where all the time has gone. This is another reason that I dread having to leave Claire, I don't want to miss anything in her life but I know I'm doing this for her.
Elena
As the new school year arrived yet again many of the students groaned as their alarms woke them up to not only wake them up for school but to also officially announce that summer was over. Elena was especially not thrilled about having to go back to school because that meant she would have to leave Claire five days a week.
The bright red lights on the digital clock seem to get brighter and brighter as her time with Claire shrunk. As Elena held Claire in her arms her eyes would looked over at the large numbers on the clock letting her know that she had twenty-eight minutes left until she would have to leave for school.
As Claire babbled to herself, Elena kissed Claire's temple and was bouncing her up and down. With a sigh Elena looked down at her school bag that lay on her bed all ready to go. She was going to be a junior this year and it was her hope that this year wouldn't involve some of the cruelty to experienced last year.
"Ready to go?" came Damon's voice as he entered Elena's bedroom as saw how anxious Elena seemed.
"No," She said quickly as she kissed her baby girl again.
"She'll be fine," Damon said with a smile as he leaned against the door.
"Its not her I'm worried about, its me" Elena told him honestly.
"Look this will be good for you, last year wasn't exactly an easy year for you but this year you can have some normal high school experiences. At least between the hours of 8am and 2pm" Damon said with a smile as he stepped closer into the room. "And this little bambina and I will be just fine" Damon said as he tickled Claire's tummy.
"So what you're going to teach her Italian now?" Elena said with a giggle.
"Hey I have a whole year off from school so who knows what the two of us will get into" Damon told her as he reached out to take Claire from Elena. She was reluctant at first to let Claire go but then gave in and handed her over knowing she had to get going for school.
"Are you sure you're okay taking a whole year off from school?" Elena asked knowing that Damon had been accepted to a number of universities but had suspended his acceptances until next year.
"Hey we have talked about this," Damon said as he bounced Claire in his arms while she played with her rattle. "You would feel more comfortable with me taking care of her during her first year then a daycare and since I really don't know what I want to go to school for I can figure it out while taking care of our little girl."
"Okay I know" Elena said taking a deep breath and grabbing her bag.
"Can you wave bye-bye Claire?" Damon said softly to the big blue eyed four month old. Holding one of Claire's little arms he had her wave to Elena as she swung her bag over her shoulder. "Say bye mommy, have a fun day at school!"
Elena smiled when she saw Claire put on a big smile for her while chewing on her rattle. "Bye, mommy is going to miss you" Elena said as she leaned in and kissed Claire again.
As Elena dragged out the goodbye Caroline and Bonnie showed up to walked with Elena to school. As Elena came down the stairs they saw how anxious she was about leaving Claire. Damon wasn't far behind Elena as he came down the stairs carrying Claire.
"There's Auntie Caroline's big girl!" Caroline said with a squeal as she clapped her hands when she saw Claire.
Claire squealed when she saw Caroline and had a huge smile on her face. Both Bonnie and Caroline giggled and awed when they heard the adorable shriek from the baby girl. Handing Claire over to Caroline so that Caroline and Bonnie could gush over her for a while as Elena made sure Damon had everything he needed.
"Okay so I've made up some bottle, I fed her around seven she can have one around ten and then lunch time" Elena said as she nervously rushed through the kitchen.
"Elena we'll be fine" Damon told her as he place his hands on her shoulders and kissed Elena's forehead. "Now go to school, have fun and maybe learn a thing or two," Damon told her.
"Okay, okay I know!" Elena said as she took a deep breath. Heading for the door Elena kissed Claire one last time before Damon took her back and watched as the three girls headed out the door.
"So this year we're juniors, it's a fresh new start I'm sure many of us could use one, one way or another." Caroline said as they entered the school halls of Mystic high once again. Elena nervously followed Caroline and Bonnie down the hallway to their lockers and got a few stares.
"I think that is easier said then done" Elena said as she saw some of the glares she was getting.
"Ignore them" Bonnie told her as she opened up her locker. "Lets just focus on making this a good year."
"Yeah" Elena said with a sigh as she fixed her hair and bit her bottom lip. She couldn't help but think about her baby girl.
As the three girls stood there they saw Jeremy walk past but he didn't so much as look their way as he past. Elena tried to stop him and talk to him but he didn't even acknowledge that Elena had said his name.
"Whoa, what seems to be wrong with him?" Bonnie asked as she watched Jeremy completely ignored Elena.
"I have no idea, but he's been sneaking out, not coming home by curfew and I think he's hanging out with some bad kids," Elena said with a worried tone as she watched her brother continue down the hall.
"Seriously how much trouble can he get into in a small town? Caroline asked.
"I don't know" Elena said as she let out a sigh. Just then the bell went and then the three headed down the hall towards their first class to begin their new school year.
As they arrived in class Elena found Stefan sitting in class and staring at his phone with a horrified look on his face. "Hey," she said she took a seat beside him. "You okay?"
"No, I have a crazy chick on my hands" Stefan said without looking up from his phone.
"You mean Amelia? Damn I was hoping Damon wasn't right about her seeing how cocky he was being about it." Elena said as she pulled out her books and placed them on the desk.
"No he's right about her," Stefan said with a deep sigh. "I mean she practically freaked out when I got a texted from Caroline and then the next day she acted like nothing happened. Then a couple days ago she was mad that I had to work and couldn't hang out and then broke up with me." Stefan said.
"She broke up with you, that's good then right?" Elena asked wondering why he still seemed confused.
"Well now she has changed her relationship status on Facebook to in a relationship with Stefan Salvatore" he said as he showed his mobile Facebook screen to Elena.
"Oh…" Elena said as she realized that this girl was indeed crazy.
"Plus I think she's hacked into my e-mail account," Stefan said with a sigh.
"Sorry," Elena said as she took out her own phone and stared at it half hopping Damon would call and wanting her to come home for Claire.
"So how are you doing with your separation from Claire?" Stefan asked her.
"I didn't sleep last night, and Bonnie has had to stop me from calling home twice already. I mean I know she is with Damon but I just worry I'm going to miss something while I'm gone" Elena said as she forced herself to put away her phone.
Back at the Salvatore house Damon had a recorded football game playing on the television screen. Checking his stop-watched Damon was kneeling in the middle on the room with Claire lying on her back in front of him kicking her legs. "Okay, it's game time, three, two one go!" Damon called out as he clapped his hands and then bent down and pulled out a clean diaper out of the diaper bag. Quickly unsnapping the buttons on Claire's blue bodysuit he pushed up the clothing to bring the dirty diaper into view. While Claire babbled away, Damon removed the dirty diaper and folded it up with one hand while the other held Claire's feet up. Tossing the dirty diaper from where he sat he got it into the trash bin across the room. After using a wipe he unfolded the clean diaper and placed it under Claire. Strapping it up and then rebuttoning her bodysuit, Damon pressed stop on his timer and checked it time.
"Twenty seconds baby!" Damon said happily. Claire lay on the floor giggling at her daddy. With a smile Damon reached down and picked Claire up and started to kiss her cheek. "We're an awesome team!" he told her as Claire reached out to touch Damon's cheeks. In the middle of their father, daughter moment there was a knock at the door. Wondering whom it would be Damon got up and while holding Claire against his chest he got to his feet and headed for the door.
As he opened up the door he wasn't expecting to see the person standing on the other side and actually didn't really want to see her. "Katherine, what are you doing here?" he asked with an annoyed tone.
"I thought you might be lonely here alone and I have a few hours before my next class" Katherine said as she pushed passed Damon and entered the house. "Thought you may like some company," she said as she took a seat on the sofa.
"I'd hate to sound rude but Katherine you're the last person I'd want to see" Damon told her as he came into the main room still holding Claire.
"I'd highly doubt that," Katherine said with a devilish grin as she crossed her legs seductively in her very short dress. "You missed a fun morning on campus today, Collage is so much better then high school." She told him.
"Look Katherine as great at it is for you to invited yourself over when ever your black heart feels like it, I've got better things to do then deal with you" Damon told her.
"Come on how long are you going to stay mad at me?" Katherine asked as she got up and crossed the room to close the distance between them. As she came to stand in front of him she let her eye move from Damon to the adorable little girl he was holding. As Katherine touched Claire's little hands she let out a sigh. "She should have been ours…"
"No offence Katherine but you and I spent more time trying to hurt each other that there was no room for a baby in that war," Damon told her as he moved passed Katherine to put Claire on her play mat.
"Damon you may see me as a cold hearted bitch but I do love you," she told him.
"No Katherine, you love attention and when you don't have it you will do anything to get it. I got tired of your crap and thank god I did" Damon told her.
"Damon we spent our whole high school looking forward to college and all the parties and fun we could get into and yet now look at you, your home with a baby! What the hell happened to the Damon I knew, the one whom only cared about himself and having a good time? Trust me Damon you may think your happy staying home but trust me I know you better then you know and your going to miss being part of the college experience" Katherine told him angrily and then turned on her heals and headed out of the house in a huff.
As Damon sat on the couch he was flipping through the channels on the t.v when there was a sudden bang! Looking up he spotted Elena running into the room in a huff as if she had ran all the way from school. "Where is she? Where's my baby?" she pleaded.
With a smile Damon got up from his spot on the couch and moved around to where Elena was standing. Leaning in he kissed her hello but Elena still seemed to be more focus on finding Claire. "How was your day?" Damon said in a teasing voice.
"Come on Damon where is she?" she pleaded getting antsy.
Loving seeing how Elena seemed to be unable to standing still or relax Damon found it a little hard to resist playing his game a little longer. "Claire…um she was here…"
"DAMON!" she cried about to pull her hair out.
Damon couldn't help but laugh but decided to put Elena out of her misery, "Okay calm down," Damon told her as he stopped her from jumping around. "Think about it, its 2pm where is she usually at 2pm?"
"Um she would just be up from her nap," Elena said as she brushed her hair out of her face. "Her Swing! She should be in her swing!" she said quickly.
With a smile Damon stepped back so that Elena could see her baby girl sitting happily in her swing watching her parents. When Claire was finally able to see her mommy she smiled and started to giggle while reaching her hands out for Elena.
"Oh baby!" Elena said as she ran over to her baby girl. With a huge smile she unstrapped Claire from her swing and picked her up and hugged her close to her chest. "Oh baby, mommy missed you so much today!" she said and started to kiss Claire all over. "How is mommy's baby girl?" did you have fun with daddy? Oh I missed you so much" she added in between kissing her.
As Elena continued on talking to Claire, Stefan walked in the door a little puzzled on how Elena had beat him home when he was the one with a car. "How did she out run my car?" he asked Damon as he took a seat on the couch beside his brother. Damon just shook his head and laughed.
"Anyway I need your help" he asked Damon in a troubling tone.
"What did you do now?" Damon asked.
"He's got girl trouble," Elena said as she came over to the sofa and took a seat next to Damon while bouncing Claire on her lap.
"The crazy chick? I thought you broke up?" Damon asked.
"That's what I thought, but she seemed to have somehow got my password for Facebook now and has changed my relationship status to in a relationship with her…"
Damon couldn't help but laugh while both Elena and Stefan didn't find the situation funny at all. "God she is even crazier then I first thought!" Damon said.
"I need you to break up with her for me" Stefan blurted out.
"What?" Damon said not sure he heard his brother right.
"I need you to break up with her for me" Stefan repeated.
"Why? I'm not the one who started dating her," Damon told him.
"Yes but you are like the master in breaking up with girls, I mean there were times you broke up with them and they didn't even now you were breaking up with them but that taking some space was in their best interest. Damon you are like the king of ending relationships and somehow not having the girls hate you afterwards. Now I won't be picky about how you do it and I don't expect you to end it with her so she doesn't' hate me but I just want you to get her out of my life!"
"This is crazy, are you like scared of her or something?"
"Yes!" Stefan said without thinking about it. "Come on Damon!"
"NO! Deal with your own crazy chick, I had too and I'll even give you some advice. Make sure there isn't anything she can throw at you when you tell her" Damon said with a smile.
Slouching back on the couch Stefan let out a sigh. As the three sat there they suddenly heard someone yelling outside and after a few seconds they realized whom ever it was yelling Stefan's name. "OH GOD SHE'S HERE!" Stefan said as his eyes went wide.
Getting up the three headed for the front door and peaked their heads out the window. Elena was still holding Claire as she babbled away with herself. "Well go talk to her!" Damon said as he pushed his brother towards the door.
"STEFAN! They heard Amelia yell.
"Just pretend we're not home and she'll go away."
"STEFAN!"
As Stefan hid behind the door Damon kept peaking out to see if Amelia would give up. Yet it seemed like the longer they ignored her the angrier she got. Her voice was getting louder and she was jumping up and down like a two year old having a temper tantrum.
"Wow bro, you really know how to pick them" Damon said as he watched Amelia with her evil eyes.
"Thanks" Stefan growled not liking the tone Damon used.
"Oh god she's got a bat!" Elena shrieked in horror.
"Crap!" Damon said as he watched Amelia start to swing the bat around and then headed for Stefan's car that was parked on the driveway. "She's going for the car!"
"What!" Stefan yelled as he ran over to look out the window just in time to see Amelia take a swing at the windshield. "Damn it!" he yelled and then swing open the front door just as Amelia was taking another swing. "HEY!" he yelled at her as the bat made contact with the hood of the car. Stefan let out a shriek at the crazy bitch was destroying his car.
Damon and Elena followed him out and stood on the front porch in shock of what Amelia was doing. "So you dated this crazy?" Elena asked Damon quietly.
"No she definitely takes the cake…" Damon said still shocked at what she was doing.
"AMELIA STOP IT!" Stefan yelled as his hands started to pull at his hair. He was about to run at her but Damon held him back. "DAMON WHAT THE HELL!"
"We can fix the car but if that girl swings at your head he can't fix it!" Damon insisted.
"AMELIA PLEASE STOP IT!" Stefan yelled at her.
"Why didn't you call me after school?" She asked him as she held the bat in one hand and leaned against it. "Why did I have to come all the way here for you to even notice me!" she yelled back at him.
"I just walked in the frigging door!" Stefan yelled.
All the loud voiced was too much for little Claire and she started to cry in fear of what was going on. Cuddling her close and making hushing sounds Elena headed back into the house to calm Claire down.
"So you were going to call me?" Amelia asked as if nothing had happened.
"Look just put the bat down!" Stefan yelled at her ignoring her last question.
Amelia stood there for a moment holding the bat and looked over at what she did to Stefan's car. "I'm sorry you must think I'm a crazy person or something?"
"No we weren't thinking that at all," Damon said with a smile, which got a glare from Stefan.
"Stefan?" Amelia whined.
"Look Amelia we broke up… you broke up with me remember?" Stefan said not really sure why they were having this conversation at all.
"Only because you never made me your girlfriend on Facebook, I fixed that" she said with a big smile.
"Yeah Amelia that is another thing, you can't hack onto my Facebook account" he told her as he shook his head.
"Yes I can, I already did it," she told him.
"She's got a point bro," Damon said.
"Yes but you shouldn't!" Stefan said while giving Damon a look like your not helping.
"Stefan?" Amelia whine again and the noise of her voice was becoming pretty irritating to Stefan now.
"Look Amelia I'm sorry it's not you its me!" he told her. "I'm not good enough for you."
"Oh you're giving her that cliché?" Damon said as he rolled his eyes.
"Shut up Damon your not helping!" Stefan snapped at his brother who was still standing behind him with his arms crossed over his chest. Turing back to face Amelia, Stefan let out a sigh, "I'm sorry Amelia but it's over…"
Scrunching up her nose and letting out a mean growl Amelia picked up the bat and took one last swing at Stefan's car and smashed off the passenger side mirror. Stefan winced at the sound and watched as the side mirror fell to the ground. "Screw you Stefan!" Amelia yelled and then stormed off and over t her own car to drive off.
"Man that is one crazy bitch!" Damon said with a laugh. "We should make sure to lock the doors tonight just incase she considers murdering you while your sleeping" Damon said as he headed back into the house. With a sigh Stefan went over to check out the damage on his car.
As they days went by both Damon and Elena were getting into a groove of going to school and taking care of Claire. The mornings were becoming less hectic as Elena wasn't having much separation anxiety anymore. Each morning she would get up to nurse Claire before school and have a little one on one time with her.
Each day after sending Elena off to school Damon would take Claire over to his house to spend the day. As he dealt with dirty diapers, spit up and Claire crying he would get texts from his friends at Collage telling him all the great stuff he was missing out on and sending pictures of parties they were at.
One afternoon he was having a hard time getting Claire to go down for her afternoon nap and it didn't seem to matter what he did she wouldn't stop fussing. "Come on Claire I know your tired..." Damon said he bounced her up and down. He had tried giving Claire her soother but each time just spit it out and cried some more.
She seemed determined not to go to sleep no matter what Damon tried and he did try pretty much everything. He rocked her back and forth, made hushing sounds in her ear, rubbed her tummy, played her annoying music box no matter what she wasn't' giving in. "Come one baby girl what's wrong?" Damon asked her softly as he kissed her temple. He had figure that she must be exhausted from all the crying but was too stubborn to give in and go to sleep.
As he started to rock her again his phone started t go off in his pocket and with a groan he reach for it and saw it was another message from one of his friends on campus sending him a picture of crazy initiation his friend was having to do to join a fraternity. Getting annoyed he tossed the phone onto the dresser and started bouncing once again. It was hard to believe that last year at this time he was thinking about what colleges to go to and what fraternity he would join and now here he was not in college and stuck at home taking care of a screaming baby. If someone would of told him last year that his future involved dirty diapers and late nights caring for a baby instead of picking up college chicks and parting every night he would of thought they were on crack.
As Elena arrived at the Salvatore house after school she wanted nothing more then to play with her baby girl but unfortunately had a group project she had to do. She was only there for about half an hour to nurse Claire after her nap and then had to pass her back over to Damon and head out the door to meet up at the library to work on the project. Claire started to cry when Elena was getting ready to leave again and it broke Elena's heart to see her baby girl reaching out for her mommy as she headed out the door.
"It's okay Claire, mommy will be back" Damon whispered in the little girls ear as a tearful Elena had to run out of the house. With a sigh Damon headed into the main room just as his phone was going off. Checking the message it was his friends telling him about an awesome party that he should come to. With a sad sigh Damon shoved the phone into his pocket while he carried Claire over to her swing.
"Everything okay?" Zach asked as he sat on the couch reading the paper and saw the stressed look on Damon's face.
"Everything is fine just fine…" he lied.
Around 9pm Elena walked in the door of the Salvatore house with her hands full of books. Tossing them aside she raced up the stairs hoping to catch Damon before he put Claire down but when she arrived at the closed nursery door she knew that she had missed putting her to bed.
"Sorry she didn't sleep much today so I put her down early" Damon with an apologetic look.
"No that's fine," Elena said with a sigh although she was a little disappointed she missed putting her daughter to bed. "I've got some more homework to do anyway…"
Going back to grab her books, Elena noticed that Damon had forgotten to give Claire her fuzzy pink bear blanket to sleep with and quickly grabbed it and ran up the stairs. "Damon you forgot to give Claire her fuzzy pink bear blanket! She can't sleep without it" Elena told him as she headed for the nursery.
"Actually lately she doesn't sleep with it" he told her and stopped her from waking Claire up.
"What do you mean, it's her fuzzy pink bear blanket, it's her favorite!" Elena told him as she waved it around.
"Well today the only way I could get her to go to sleep was to wrap her in one of your old sweaters" Damon told her.
"What?"
"She was really fussy today but when I wrapped her up in the sweeter you wore yesterday she went to sleep for me" Damon told her and watched as Elena bit her bottom lip. She stood there for a moment nodding her head and then all of a sudden broke down and fell to her knees.
"Hey, hey!" Damon said as he rushed to Elena's side as he whole body started to shake uncontrollable as she cried. Damon wrapped his arms around her and rubbed her back as Elena buried her face in his shirt.
"I'm a terrible mother" Elena cried, "I don't even know what me own baby likes anymore," she cried.
"No Elena don't say that" Damon told her as he kissed her forehead and tried to calm Elena down.
"No I'm not!" She cried in Damon's arms. "All of these thing that are suppose to be the right things like going to school, but in the morning I have to leave her and sometimes I come home and she's already asleep. And how I can't play peek-a-boo with her because I have to study, I mean these I suppose to be important things too and these right decisions don't feel so right" she cried.
"I know baby, I know" Damon said as he kissed Elena's temple and did his best to comfort her. It broke his heart to see how broken up she was about how things had to be and he hoped that somehow they would be able to make it all work out.
"Listen to me, you are a great mother," he told her as he wiped away hear tears. "She lights up when ever she sees you and I know it's hard but we'll figure it all out okay" Damon said as he leaned into give her a gently kiss. Elena nodded her head and let out a sniffle as Damon wiped away her tears. "You are an amazing mother Elena, no one could ever replace you in Claire's life. Okay?"
"Thank you" she said with a sniffle as she leaned in for another hug. The two stayed there for quite some time just enjoying being in each other's embrace before getting up and heading to Damon's room to get some sleep.