Dear Diary

When you have a child, everything that was important to you shifts. As a teenage mother you go from being selfish where everything you do is about you, to a mother whose main priority becomes the baby.

As a teenager our biggest fear is if that cute boy in math class will turn back and look at you. You fall in love and the worst fear you have is if he will break your heart because you give him your whole heart. You come to believe that this love is the only thing that can come into your life and light it up or the thing that can break your heart, but then you become a mother.

Elena

Cradling the fussy eight month old in her arms, Elena rocked her back and forth in the nursery. She had been trying to get Claire to go down for the night for over an hour now but wasn't having much luck. "Come on baby girl, I know your tired" Elena whispered to the little girl as she pressed a kiss to her temple.

Claire's cries got louder as she started to push against Elena's chest not wanting to settle. Wrapping a blanket around her and swaddling her, Elena tried singing a soft lullaby to her. She watched as Claire let out a barking cough and rubbed her eyes, obviously tired but for some reason didn't want to settle at all. Turning to look at the clock it was almost ten o'clock and she had plans to meet Damon at a party. Yet as she stood in the middle of the nursery rocking Claire she knew there was no way she was going to make it to that party.

With a sigh she gave Claire her soother and that calmed her down a bit but she was still moaning as she looked up at her mommy with sad eyes. Pulling out her phone Elena pressed 2 for Damon's speed dial. As she balanced Claire in one arm she held the phone up to her ear with the other.

As it rang she bounced Claire and made hushing noises while looking down at her tired but stubborn little girl. Leaning down to kiss her forehead Elena figured that she was a little warm. The phone rang for about three rings and then Elena heard the sound of loud music and people laughing on the other line.

"Hey, you almost here?" she heard Damon asked.

Biting her bottom lip she continued to bounce Claire up and down while she moaned. "Actually I don't think I'm going to make it" Elena told him in an apologetic tone. "Claire doesn't want to settle and she is a little warm," she added.

"You want me to come over?" Damon asked.

"No it's fine, you have fun I know you have been looking forward to tonight so I'll take care of Claire" Elena assured him. She knew that Damon was missing seeing his friends since he was home with Claire everyday.

"Okay, call me if you need anything" Damon told her before he hung up.

Setting the phone down Elena gave all of her attention to the crying little girl and put a hand to her little forehead to feel how warm she was. "What's wrong baby girl?"

Hanging up the phone Damon set it down on the counter and let out a sigh as he leaned against the counter. He had hoped that him and Elena could enjoy an night out together and just be regular teenagers for a night but that didn't seem to be the case tonight. Reaching for a beer on the counter he popped it open and took a gulp.

"Well look who it is?" came a female's voice from behind him.

Turning to look at the girl Damon smiled as he saw an old classmate of his, Meredith Fell. With a drink in her hand she passed a number of teenagers to get over to where Damon was standing. She had a big smile on her face as she came to stand in front of him. "I see you have been released from baby duty," she said with a laugh.

"For one night" Damon told her.

"I've heard that Elena has you on a short leash" Meredith teased as she took a step closer to him.

"You've been talking to Katherine" Damon stated before taking another drink.

"Actually my brother Logan has been talking to Katherine and he told me" Meredith explained. Damon and Logan had been close friends through out high school and because of that Meredith got to know Damon pretty well. In fact she had the chance to get to know Damon is a way Logan never did. "Him and Katherine have been getting together whenever he is in town."

Damon gave a slight smile and nodded his head before turning and taking a sip from his beer bottle. "So I've heard," Damon, told her because Logan wasn't one to not brag about whom he was banging.

"Jealous?" Meredith asked as she tilted her head and smiled at Damon watching for any sense of jealously in his eyes.

"No I'm not," Damon said with a bit of a laugh. To be honest when Damon had first heard about Logan hooking up with Katherine, jealously or anger were not any of the emotions he had running through his head. In fact he could really careless what Katherine did or with who. He may have been with Katherine for years but he never really cared about her and she was pretty much nothing but someone he used to screw when he was bored.

Meredith smiled and set her empty drink on the table, "Good, cause I always hated that girl" Meredith said as she leaned in closer. "Would you be a dear and get me another drink?"

With a smile Damon pushed off from the counter and went off to get Meredith another drink. Meredith smiled and watched him leave and thought about how fun tonight could be with Damon especially if he got really drunk. Glancing down she saw his phone start to fibrate and as she pressed a button to on his phone the screen lit up and she saw he had a message from Elena. Rolling her eyes at the name on the phone she clicked the message so that it looked as if he had already seen it and wouldn't bother calling her back.

Elena stood there in the hallway with a nervous look on her face as she held the phone to her ear. "Come on Damon pick up!" she begged with a nervous and worried tone. Claire had a very high fever and her breathing was very raspy now, she had never been like this before and Elena didn't like this at all.

When she got no answer she called hung up figuring he probably couldn't hear his phone. She then dialed Dr. Bennett knowing she would tell her what to do since Claire's breathing was only getting worse. "It's okay baby girl we will figure it out."

Shots were brought over for the group as everyone cheered and clapped their hands. "3, 2, 1 GO!" Meredith called out and then everyone around the table took a shot. Damon downed his shot and then placed it on the table and watched as Meredith did a little dance.

"Another round?" Meredith asked with a smile as she looked at the group who seemed to be really drunk.

"How are you still standing?" someone asked her as their placed the shot glass down.

"I think she is cheating somehow" Damon insisted as he smiled and touched Meredith's chin. It was only for a second and then he turned back to the group and joined in a card game.

Meredith smiled happily figuring that with just a few more drinks, Damon would forget all about Elena and the baby and would only be thinking of her. As she stood there watching Damon talking with some of the guys she stood beside him and felt his phone begin to vibrate in her jean pocket yet again. Quickly while Damon was busy and not paying attention to her she checked to see who it was and Elena's name came up on the screen and showed that he had five messages from her. Rolling her eyes Meredith thought Elena was nothing but a whiny and controlling girlfriend and hoped that after tonight she would be out of the picture.

Stuffing the phone back in her pocket she flicked her hair back and placed an arm around Damon's shoulders and joined in the laughter of the group. The way Meredith saw it, one way or another Damon would be hers tonight.

Across the room Caroline was glaring at Meredith knowing full well the girl was doing her best to put the moves on Damon. Sure Damon wasn't intentionally flirting back with her but seeing how Damon was Damon and a drunken Damon at that who knew how much longer he would be able to resist returning to his old habits.

"Come on Caroline can we just forget about them?" Tyler begged as he sat next to his girlfriend and wrapped his arm around her. "Damon isn't doing anything with her and I doubt he will."

"Yeah but with her hanging over him like that all night he might just give in" Caroline insisted. "Elena is one of my best friends and he better not think about screwing that slut while Elena is taking care of his daughter!"

"I'm sure Damon will behave" Tyler told her and then kissed her neck trying to get her mind of Damon.

"Yeah well Damon's behaving and normal person behaving aren't the same thing" Caroline snapped as she got up from her spot and crossed the room passing a number of drunk kids to get to where Damon was playing shot games.

"Uh oh I won again!" Damon said with a smirk and watched as everyone else at the table took a shot.

After making her way through the crowd and having to push a few drunken kids off her she finally reached the table where Damon and the others were. As she reached them she saw Meredith hugging Damon's shoulders and resting her chin on top of his jet-black hair while he was sitting at the table. Not liking how comfortable she was making herself Caroline grabbed Meredith by her free arm and pulled her back.

"Hey! What the hell?" Meredith whined as Caroline came to stand in between her and Damon. For a second when he heard Meredith complain Damon turned to look at her but didn't seem too interested in standing up for her.

"I'm sorry but you seemed to have mistaken my best friend's boyfriend for your own" Caroline snapped at her.

"Look this is none of your business" Meredith snapped at Caroline. "No back off!"

"No you back off!" Caroline yelled. At this point the scene had now got the attention of many of the drunken teenagers as the two girls seemed to be ready to get into a catfight.

"Caroline come on" Tyler said as he ran up and tried to pull Caroline away.

"He has a baby with my best friend and the fact that you haven't taken the hints of him not flirting back with you are just sad and pathetic," Caroline told her with a angry tone.

"You bitch!" Meredith yelled as she lunged at Caroline.

"Alright that's enough!" Damon yelled as he jumped in front and pushed Meredith back before she could get to Caroline.

"Damon what are you doing? Have you not been listening to her, I want to punch her face!" Meredith screamed.

Damon laughed and shook his head, "No offence Mer but Blondie here can take you" Damon told her and watched as the hurt appeared on Meredith's face. He stared at her for a moment and then with a sigh he shrugged his shoulders. "Look I'm going to head out, as fun as this is I need to go check on Claire" he said and then reached into his pocket looking for his phone.

"Damon come one you don't have to go" Meredith told him as she ran to him not wanting him to leave.

"Where's my phone?" Damon asked as he patted down his jeans looking for his phone and ignoring Meredith's pleads.

"Damon I'm sure she's fine!"

"Did you see my phone? I had it, I used it and then I…" he stopped in mid sentence and looked up at Meredith with a glare. He remembered being on the phone with Elena and then when he hung up he had placed the phone on the counter while talking to Meredith and then he went to get them some drinks and when he came back he never saw his phone again. "What did you do with my phone?"

"Look she is obsessive and can't seem to survive a night without you" Meredith told him as she saw the anger growing in Damon's eyes.

"Give me my phone Meredith" Damon ordered her and everyone in the room stared at Meredith as she desperately tried to get Damon to forget about the phone and Elena.

"Damon come on," Meredith said as she started to cry.

"GIVE ME MY PHONE!" Damon yelled.

Meredith had tears in her eyes, she had hoped Damon would want to be with her but even after all those shots he was still determined to make things work with Elena. She hated it, because for almost a year she had tried to get Damon to commit to her and yet he continued to sleep around. What was so special about Elena that made him give up all his flings for her and yet she never could get him to. Baby or not why was Elena the one he gave up everything for.

As Damon remained persistent about getting his phone, Meredith let out a sigh and gave in. Shaking her head realizing Damon would never be hers she pulled his phone out and handed it to him.

As he continued to glare at her, Damon quickly grabbed his phone from her hands and did it with force. Not even bothering to say anything to her he walked off and left her and everybody else standing there in shock of the scene that had just taken place.

Storming out Damon glanced down at his phone and saw that he had fifteen unanswered messages from Elena. Quickly he put the phone to his ear and started to listen to them, but as soon as he heard Elena's voice say they were in the hospital he made a run for it.

Standing in the room that Elena and Claire were taken to, she looked down at her little girl as she continued to have a fever and a high pitch raspy voice that just seemed to be getting worse. The Doctor had just been in and given Claire a single dose of steroid to help reduce the swelling in her airways but was told it may take a few hours to work.

Claire looked so tired but was unable to sleep due to her soar throat. She had her tiny fist wrapped around Elena's finger tightly as she lay in the hospital crib. Whipping a tear away from her eye, Elena used her free hand that wasn't being clutched by Claire to brush over her head.

She suddenly heard footsteps come running into the room and when she turned around she saw Damon standing there as his eye fell on the crib that Claire was lying in. Over the last two hours Elena had called Damon worried and scared but after not hearing from him she was now furious with him.

"Where the hell have been?" Elena snapped at him with her watery red eyes and furious and terrified look on her face. "I've called you like a hundred times!"

"I know I'm sorry," Damon said as he stepped further into the room with a look of compete guilt on his face. "I didn't have my phone on me" he told her figuring it wasn't time to bring up what had happened with Meredith.

"Yeah well while you were off partying and getting drunk I was here with our daughter!" Elena screamed at him.

"Hey on the phone you told me she was fine, how was I suppose to know that you saying she was fine would lead to her being in the hospital!" Damon snapped back. As much as he was worried about Claire being in the hospital he didn't like that she was blaming him from not knowing she was so sick that she would have to be in the hospital. Walking past Elena he made his way over to the crib and looked down at his little ladybug.

"What's wrong with her?" Damon asked.

"They're running tests, she had a fever, she makes a raspy sound when she breathing, she has this barking cough, and a runny nose" Elena told him as she moved to stand on the other side of Claire's hospital crib. Biting her bottom lip Elena let out a sniffle, "We took her to the park a few days ago, you wanted to take her to the park" Elena said.

Hearing this Damon looked up at her in anger, "You think this is my fault?"

"Your were the one who was so insisted of us going" Elena told him, "Who knows what she could of picked up there."

"Going to the park doesn't make you sick Elena!" Damon snapped back angrily. "Besides you take her to a mommy and me swimming classes every week, I highly doubt that public pool water is very clean" Damon told her.

"I would never do anything that could harm my baby" Elena told him as tears continued to fall and she glared at Damon across the crib.

"You keep forgetting she is MY daughter too! I would never want to cause her harm" Damon growled back at her as he gripped the side of the crib while he glared at Elena.

The two terrified parents glared at each other, as they felt powerless and unable to control the situation with their baby girl. Feeling powerless they were taking their fears and frustration out on each other since there was nothing they would do for Claire. The two looked away from each other afraid they would say something else that could potentially make things worse. Tears continued to fall from Elena's eyes as she looked across the room trying so hard to control her emotions.

Across from her Damon looked down at his little ladybug as she let out a barking cough and started a raspy cry. He rubbed her tummy as Claire lay there looking up at her daddy and stopped her crying. As he watched her he noticed that her raspy breathing was getting worse and her face was starting to turn blue.

"She can't breath!" Damon said and Elena quickly looked down in fear. "WE NEED A DOCTOR NOW!" Damon yelled and storming towards the door to find a doctor or nurse.

"Claire! Baby girl" Elena cried in a panic as her daughter struggled to breath and there was nothing she could do.

Within seconds the room was swarmed with doctors and nurses as they surrounded the crib. Elena was holding Claire's tiny hand as she begged the doctors to help her little girl who was still turning blue.

"Miss I need you to back away" one of the nurses told her as they tried to moved Elena out of the way. There were so many doctors and nurses' hands moving around and doing everything they could to help the eight month old.

"Please you got to help her" Elena cried, "Baby girl mommy is right here."

As the doctors tried to work, Damon came up behind Elena and wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to the other side of the room so that the doctors could work to save their ladybug.

"Her airway is closed off! She needs oxygen" the doctor said out loud.

Their eyes were full of tears as they watched helplessly. Elena pretty much collapse, as she was unable to remain standing as she watched in horror. Her hands gripped Damon's arm that was draped across her chest. Her fingers were digging into his skin, as her worst fear was playing out right in front of her. She cried begging the doctors to please save her baby, and begging Claire not to give up. Holding her tight Damon was doing his best to hold it together and be strong as he pressed a kiss to the top of Elena's head as tears continued to fall. He watched as the doctor's worked to get oxygen to their daughter's lungs while praying their ladybug would be all right.